All's Well That Ends Well (9 page)

LAFEW
    Do all they deny her? An they were sons

of mine, I'd have them whipped, or I would send them to

th'Turk
⁹⁰
to make eunuchs of.

HELEN
    Be not afraid that I your hand should take.

I'll never do you wrong for your own sake.

Blessing upon your vows, and in your bed

Find fairer fortune, if you ever wed!

LAFEW
    These boys are boys of ice, they'll none have

her.
Sure
⁹⁶
they are bastards to the English, the French ne'er

got
⁹⁷
'em.

HELEN
    You are too young, too
happy
⁹⁸
, and too good,

To make yourself a son out of my blood.

FOURTH LORD
    Fair one, I think not so.

LAFEW
    There's one
grape
¹⁰¹
yet. I am sure thy father

drunk wine.
¹⁰²
But if thou be'st not an ass, I am a youth of

fourteen. I have
known
¹⁰³
thee already.

HELEN
    I dare not say I take you, but I give

Me and my service, ever whilst I live,

Into your guiding power. This is the man.

KING
    Why, then, young Bertram, take her: she's thy wife.

BERTRAM
    My wife, my liege? I shall beseech your highness,

In such a business give me leave to use

The help of mine own eyes.

KING
    Know'st thou not, Bertram, what she has done for me?

BERTRAM
    Yes, my good lord,

But never hope to know why I should marry her.

KING
    Thou know'st she has raised me from my sickly bed.

BERTRAM
    But follows it, my lord, to
bring me down
¹¹⁵

Must answer for your raising? I know her well:

She had her
breeding
at my father's
charge.
¹¹⁷

A poor physician's daughter my wife? Disdain

Rather
corrupt
me
ever!
¹¹⁹

KING
    'Tis only
title
¹²⁰
thou disdain'st in her, the which

I can build up. Strange is it that our bloods,

Of colour, weight and heat, poured all together,

Would quite
confound distinction
, yet
stands off
¹²³

In differences so mighty. If she be

All that is virtuous, save what thou dislik'st,

A poor physician's daughter, thou dislik'st

Of virtue for the name. But do not so.

From lowest place whence virtuous things
proceed
¹²⁸
,

The place is dignified by th'doer's deed.

Where
great additions swell's, and virtue none
¹³⁰
,

It is a
dropsied
¹³¹
honour. Good alone

Is good without a name. Vileness is so:

The
property
by what it is should
go
¹³³
,

Not by the title. She is young, wise, fair.

In these to nature she's immediate
heir
¹³⁵
,

And these breed honour.
That is honour's scorn
¹³⁶
,

Which challenges itself as honour's born

And is not like the sire. Honours thrive,

When rather from our acts we them derive

Than our
foregoers.
¹⁴⁰
The mere word's a slave,

Deboshed
¹⁴¹
on every tomb, on every grave

A lying
trophy
¹⁴²
, and as oft is dumb,

Where dust and damned oblivion is the tomb

Of
honoured bones indeed.
¹⁴⁴
What should be said?

If thou canst like this creature as a maid,

I can create the rest: virtue and she

Is her own
dower
¹⁴⁷
, honour and wealth from me.

BERTRAM
    I cannot love her, nor will
strive
¹⁴⁸
to do't.

KING
    Thou wrong'st thyself if thou shouldst strive to
choose.
¹⁴⁹

HELEN
    That you are well
restored
¹⁵⁰
, my lord, I'm glad.

Let the rest go.

KING
    My honour's
at the stake
,
which
¹⁵²
to defeat,

I must produce my power. Here, take her hand,

Proud scornful boy, unworthy
this
¹⁵⁴
good gift,

That dost in vile
misprision
¹⁵⁵
shackle up

My love and her
desert.
That
¹⁵⁶
canst not dream,

We
,
poising
us in her
defective
¹⁵⁷
scale,

Shall
weigh thee to the beam.
¹⁵⁸
That wilt not know,

It is
in us
¹⁵⁹
to plant thine honour where

We please to have it grow.
Check
¹⁶⁰
thy contempt:

Obey our will, which
travails in
¹⁶¹
thy good.

Believe not
thy disdain, but
presently
¹⁶²

Do thine own fortunes that obedient right

Which both thy duty owes and our power claims,

Or I will throw thee from my care forever

Into
the staggers
and the
careless
lapse
¹⁶⁶

Of youth and ignorance, both my revenge and hate

Loosing
¹⁶⁸
upon thee, in the name of justice,

Without
all terms
¹⁶⁹
of pity. Speak. Thine answer.

BERTRAM
    Pardon, my gracious lord, for I submit

My
fancy
¹⁷¹
to your eyes. When I consider

What
great creation
and what
dole
¹⁷²
of honour

Flies where you bid it, I find that she,
which late
¹⁷³

Was in my nobler thoughts most base, is now

The praisèd of the king,
who
¹⁷⁵
, so ennobled,

Is as 'twere born so.

KING
    Take her by the hand,

And tell her she is thine, to whom I promise

A
counterpoise
, if
not
¹⁷⁹
to thy estate,

A balance more
replete.
¹⁸⁰

BERTRAM
    I take her hand.

KING
    Good fortune and the favour of the king

Smile upon this contract,
whose ceremony
¹⁸³

Shall seem expedient on the now-born brief,

And be performed tonight. The solemn feast

Shall
more attend upon the coming space
¹⁸⁶
,

Expecting
absent friends.
As
¹⁸⁷
thou lov'st her,

Thy love's to me
religious
, else, does
err.
¹⁸⁸

LAFEW
    Do you hear, monsieur? A word with you.

PAROLLES
    Your pleasure, sir.

LAFEW
    Your lord and master did well to make his

recantation.

PAROLLES
    Recantation? My lord? My master?

LAFEW
    Ay. Is it not a language I speak?

PAROLLES
    A most harsh one, and not to be understood

without bloody
succeeding.
¹⁹⁶
My master?

LAFEW
    Are you
companion
¹⁹⁷
to the Count Rossillion?

PAROLLES
    To any count, to all counts, to what is
man.
¹⁹⁸

LAFEW
    To what is count's man. Count's master is of

another style.

PAROLLES
    You are
too old
, sir. Let it
satisfy
²⁰¹
you, you are too old.

LAFEW
    I must tell thee, sirrah, I
write
²⁰²
man, to which title

age cannot bring thee.

PAROLLES
    What I
dare too well do, I dare not do.
²⁰⁴

LAFEW
    I did think thee, for two
ordinaries
²⁰⁵
, to be a pretty

wise fellow. Thou didst make tolerable
vent
²⁰⁶
of thy travel, it

might pass. Yet the
scarfs
and the
bannerets
²⁰⁷
about thee did

manifoldly dissuade me from believing thee a
vessel
²⁰⁸
of too

great a
burden.
I have now
found
thee.
²⁰⁹
When I lose thee

again, I care not. Yet art thou good for nothing but
taking up
²¹⁰
,

and that thou'rt scarce worth.

PAROLLES
    Hadst thou not the privilege of
antiquity
²¹²
upon

thee—

LAFEW
    Do not plunge thyself too far in anger, lest thou

hasten thy
trial
, which if— lord have mercy on thee for a
hen!
²¹⁵

So, my good
window of lattice
, fare thee well. Thy
casement
²¹⁶
I

need not open, for I look through thee. Give me thy hand.

PAROLLES
    My lord, you give me most
egregious
²¹⁸
indignity.

LAFEW
    Ay, with all my heart, and thou art worthy of it.

PAROLLES
    I have not, my lord, deserved it.

LAFEW
    Yes, good faith, every
dram
of it, and I will not
bate
²²¹

thee a
scruple.
²²²

PAROLLES
    Well, I shall be
wiser.
²²³

LAFEW
    Even as soon as thou canst, for thou hast to
pull at a
²²⁴

smack o'th'contrary. If ever thou be'st bound in thy scarf

and beaten, thou shall find what it is to be proud of thy

bondage.
I have a desire to
hold
²²⁷
my acquaintance with thee,

or rather my knowledge, that I may say
in the default
²²⁸
, he is a

man I
know.
²²⁹

PAROLLES
    My lord, you do me most insupportable vexation.

LAFEW
    I would it were hell-pains for thy sake, and my
poor
²³¹

doing
eternal. For doing I am past, as I
will
by thee,
in what
²³²

motion age will give me leave.

PAROLLES
    Well, thou hast a son
shall take this disgrace off me
²³⁴
;

scurvy
²³⁵
, old, filthy, scurvy lord! Well, I must be patient. There

is no
fettering
²³⁶
of authority. I'll beat him, by my life, if I can

meet him
with any convenience
,
an
²³⁷
he were double and

double a lord. I'll have no more pity of his age than I would

have of— I'll beat him, an if I could but meet him again.

LAFEW
    Sirrah, your lord and master's married. There's

news for you: you have a new mistress.

PAROLLES
    I most unfeignedly beseech your lordship to make

some
reservation
of your
wrongs.
He is my
good lord.
Whom
²⁴³

I serve above is my master.

LAFEW
    Who? God?

PAROLLES
    Ay, sir.

LAFEW
    The devil it is that's thy master. Why dost thou

garter
up thy arms o' this fashion? Dost make
hose
²⁴⁸
of thy

sleeves? Do other servants so? Thou wert best
set thy lower
²⁴⁹

part where thy nose stands. By mine honour, if I were but

two hours younger, I'd beat thee. Methink'st thou art a

general offence, and every man should beat thee. I think

thou wast created for men to
breathe
²⁵³
themselves upon thee.

PAROLLES
    This is hard and undeserved
measure
²⁵⁴
, my lord.

LAFEW
    
Go to
, sir. You were beaten in Italy for
picking a
²⁵⁵

kernel out of a pomegranate. You are a
vagabond
²⁵⁶
and no

true
traveller. You are more
saucy
²⁵⁷
with lords and honourable

personages than the
commission
²⁵⁸
of your birth and virtue

gives you
heraldry.
²⁵⁹
You are not worth another word, else I'd

call you knave. I leave you.