Read American Love Songs Online
Authors: Ashlyn Kane
And, okay, he also ordered a really nice pair of custom boots. Retail therapy—the concert later on would be his first since his interview had been published.
He could not have been less shocked when Chris and Parker wore their Stetsons to the concert, but then Parker actually spoke into the microphone, and Jake almost had a heart attack. “Were changing up the routine a bit tonight,” he announced, thankfully sans terrible accent.
It was a good show—not their best, but far from their worst—and Jake was feeling pretty good when the afterparty finally ended and he stumbled back into the room he was sharing with Parker. “Aw, you shouldnt have,” he cooed a bit drunkenly when he saw the giant bouquet of flowers sitting on the table by his bed.
“Oh, trust me, I didnt.” Parker yawned, turning from his side onto his back and stretching. He hadnt lasted as long at the afterparty as Jake had; he never did.
“Well, who are they from, then?”
“I dunno, Allanna must have dropped them off.”
Maybe they were from her? Jake locked the door behind him and kicked his shoes into the closet. Curious, he crossed the room and turned the vase a few times, looking for a card. A lurid purple envelope was set on one of those plastic forks florists used for just such a purpose, and he snatched it up, rolled across his bed—a mistake, as he ended up dizzy and kind of nauseous—and flicked on the light so he could read it.
His first thought was that he had had too much to drink. “Parker.”
“Hmmm?” Parker didnt open his eyes.
“Does this say what I think it says?”
“Ugh, you suck.” There was a flash of pale bare skin and freckles as Parker rubbed both hands over his eyes, and then he reached over for the card and took it from Jakes nerveless fingers.
Jake was taken aback. Parker almost never swore; the most vulgar he got was the use of gestures, and Jake had never heard him put the word “holy” in front of anything.
“You got a happy-coming-out card from
Elton John
!” Oh. Holy shit.
“Not helping,” Jake told him. He looked at the card. “I didnt know they made happy-coming-out cards. Do you think I should frame it? Maybe get a shadow box and dry the flowers?”
Parker stared at him blearily. “I think you should turn the lights off and go to bed,” he suggested at length. “You can fangirl Sir Elton in the morning.”
“Huh.” Jake considered the idea. He
was
pretty comfortable. “Kay.” He leaned over and flicked off the light. He was asleep even before he could try to wiggle under the covers.
After a successful three months on the road, Independences own Wayward Sons are home to roost for a few weeks before jetting off to LA to record their second studio album. Their first album,
Manifest Destiny
, hit the shelves earlier this month and has already sold over 50,000 copies.
Chris Collins, Jimmy Jones, and Jake Brenner, all native to Independence, as well as guitarist Parker McAvoy, originally of South Dakota, have been touring the country since August with veteran altrockers Red Star. The boys plan to play three free shows as a holiday thank-you to their loyal fans here in Independence. You can catch them this Saturday at P.T. Morts and next Saturday and Sunday at Rock Lobster. All three shows begin at 9 p.m.
I bought a hot tub. What else do I need, right? Ive got a place to live— two, strictly, if you count the place were going to be renting in LA, which is a lot nicer than where we live when were at home, but its still not, you know,
home
. But we had some downtime in Kansas, so.
Jimmy went out and got a motorcycle. It is an absolutely beautiful machine, a classic Harley, but man, the thing is beat to hell and back. I think hes planning on spending the next couple of years learning how to fix it up again. He got the matching leather jacket
,
too, although I dont know how the hell hes going to be able to fit a helmet on over his hair.
Chris got drunk with a bunch of strippers and woke up with a tattoo. I wont tell you where it is, but its of a whole bunch of different colored lip prints. Its hilarious. I cant post a picture, so Ill just leave it to your imaginations.
Parker spent two days researching on my laptop, put on a suit (I didnt know he had a suit—though to be fair, its the ugliest suit Ive ever seen) and took a cab somewhere. He came home with a used Prius.
“
“Happy New Year,” Mike said back, and Jake held the phone to his shoulder to shout at Chris and Jimmy—they were having a flip-cup competition with a couple of coeds the next room over, and they had the music blaring. “Hey, assholes! Shut up, would you? Im trying to talk to our boss, here.”
The whole “professional musician” thing was still new enough that this actually held some sway, and not only did the sound die off, but Chris and Jimmy themselves left the coeds to their own devices and crowded into the practice room where Jake and Parker had been watching the broadcast from Times Square. “Whats he want?” Chris asked, but he was grinning.
Mike told him, and Jake dropped the phone. “Shit.” He fumbled for it again, spilling his beer all over himself in the process as the guys looked on in amused befuddlement. “Mike, you better not be kidding, because that shit is just not funny, okay?”
Jakes brain felt like it was currently not getting any reception. “Seriously?” was all he could think of to say, and, “Oh my God. Mike—dude, thank you.”
“This is going to be the beginning of a beautiful friendship,” Jake said stupidly, unable to keep the grin from spreading across his face. Sitting here in his buddys mediocre townhouse drinking second-rate beer with four minutes to go until midnight—this really wasnt where he thought hed be when they got signed back in June.
Mike had to get off the phone before Chris could steal it away— his wife wanted to spend time with him while he was at home for once, or something. Jake said his goodbyes without really feeling them, and once the call was disconnected, he spread his arms wide and started laughing.
“Son, if you dont tell me whats so goddamned funny, Im gonna have to beat it out of you.” But Chris didnt exactly look too threatening just then.
“
Manifest Destiny
,” Jake said when he could finally speak. He was so high right now that nothing in the world could bring him down. “It went gold, guys. Five hundred thousand copies.”
Chris said, “Holy shit.” Then he whooped so loud they probably heard it three doors down. “Holy
shit
!” This was followed by a lot of jumping up and down and hugging that Jake wasnt paying attention to now and wouldnt remember later; he thought he might be in shock.
However, he was never going to forget the look on Parkers face when Chris pulled him bodily off the couch and bear-hugged him, then laid a big, fat kiss on his mouth and ruffled his hair. “Couldnt have done it without you.”
They called in the coeds—not that Jake was surprised by that turn of events—and shared the news, and Jake already knew by the looks the girls were casting Chris and Jimmy, not to mention Parker, who as usual didnt seem to notice, that hed be heading back to their side of the semi sooner rather than later.
He wasnt wrong about that, and he didnt miss the significant glances of the third coed as he and Parker stumbled drunkenly out the door an hour later, holding on to each other for support. He was too happy to care, though, still basking in the glow of their success.
Parker was a little worse off than he was, so Jake kept an arm around his shoulders until they made it to their couch, then dropped him on it and more or less fell down himself, unreasonably winded.
“Hey, Parker,” Jake said, reaching out just far enough so that his hand could reach Parkers hair. His fingers curled into his skull without input from his brain, but Parker just made a happy little sound and pushed into the touch so that his head was resting on Jakes thigh.
“Chris is totally right, you know. So, thanks for being an awesome guitarist and not abandoning us for somebody cooler with a lot more talent.”
Jake didnt need to look to know that Parker was blushing—the silence said it all. He started pulling his hand away, figuring Parker was embarrassed enough already, but Parker made another noise, this one of protest, so he left it where it was. A few more rhythmic
thump
s punctuated the silence.
Jake smiled lazily. Man, he couldnt remember the last time hed been this close to falling asleep at not even two oclock on New Years Eve. Next time he definitely needed to go easier on the champagne. “Hmm?”
Jake didnt know what to say to that, so he just smiled and scratched his fingers gently against Parkers scalp until he passed out a few minutes later.
The good news: you all loved
Manifest Destiny
so much it went gold. I cant even tell you how awesome that makes me feel. It was so awesome that even Parker got drunk to celebrate,
that’
s how much you make us love you. Thank you, thank you, thank you.
The slightly less good news: this is going to delay our next album release somewhat, since itll be longer before we make it into the studio. But hey, I promise it will be worth it!
PRODIGAL: OFFICIAL BLOG OF THE WAYWARD SONS
Hi guys! Jake here, writing you from someplace on Interstate 80. Sorry its been so long since my last update. Weve all come down with a case of the boring. Seriously, its like weve done nothing but work, work, work for the last three weeks. Good thing we love our jobs! A big WS shout-out to LA, Vegas, Salt Lake City, Boise, and of course all my peeps in Fruitland, Utah. We missed you guys!
Anyway, here are some pictures of our time on the road/significant events you might have missed. For example: that first one is Jimmy peeing at the Great Divide! Of course I have censored it so you cant actually see him peeing, but you can imagine the way it breaks into two streams! Dont tell anyone though, I think this might be illegal, and I wouldnt want Jimmy to get in trouble! Another example: Chris at the roulette table in Vegas! I personally think the purple feather boa would look better on Parker, but Chris insisted it was lucky and wouldnt take it off the whole night.
30
And finally, my personal favorite, Parker asleep on a Formica tabletop in a McDonalds. I actually have a collection of pictures of Parker asleep at restaurants. I wish Id taken another picture when he woke up, because he had ketchup all over his face. He looked like a zombie.
Speaking of Parker, I assume the nosier of you are wanting to know how the Quest is going, though I admit it has been a while since I floated the idea by you. For anyone requiring a refresher: we need to get Parker laid. On that front, I have sadly little to report. I am not sure yet if it is because he is asexual (difficult to ascertain) or just blind (plausible. Parker cannot see shit without his glasses). He still lets me cuddle him when I have a bad dream, so I know he isnt repulsed by the touch of others. Then of course there is the possibility that hes a virgin and is afraid of sex! I keep telling him he cant get pregnant his first time, but I dont think he believes me.