America's Bravest (37 page)

oOo

“What do you mean, he’s gone?”

At five in the morning., Sophia spoke to her
mother over the phone. Louisa routinely stayed over when Tony was
on nights and Sophia was on call at the hospital. She’d just
finished an emergency surgery and had been filling in a chart at
the nurse’s station.

Her mom’s voice was trembling. “Mari had a
nightmare. I went in to see what was wrong and noticed Miguel’s
door open a little. It was closed when I went to bed. He’s not
there.”

“Did you check downstairs?”

“Yes. He never gets up this early. I’m
worried.”

“So am I. I’ll be right home.”

Her heart thumping in her chest so loud she
could practically hear it, Sophia clicked off, turned and bumped
right into Brock. “Hey, what’s the hurry? It’s the middle of the
night.”

For some reason, she clutched at his
shoulders. “Miguel’s gone. My mother called.” She pulled off her
scrub cap, sending her hair down her back. “I have to leave.” She
started for the elevator.

Brock called out, “Sophia, you need your
purse with the keys.”

“Hell.” Turning back around, she circled the
big desk, got her purse out of a locked drawer, then went back to
the elevator, where Brock waited. He pressed the button. “I’m going
with you. You’re too shaky to drive.”

“I—” She looked down. Her hands were
unsteady. “Okay.”

When they reached her car, he asked for the
keys, then they slid inside. The twenty-minute drive to her house
was nerve-wracking. She tried Tony’s cell and it clicked into
voicemail. “He must be on a call.”

“That’s all right, I’m here to help. You’re
not alone.” He used his calm, reassuring doctor’s voice and it
comforted her.

“No, I need T–” She stopped herself. “You’re
right, I can do this.”

Bolting out of the car as soon as they pulled
into her driveway, she ran into the house through the garage door.
It was still dark out and she tripped on a bike. Pain shot up her
leg, but she ignored it. Louisa met her in the kitchen. “
Dios
mio
, what has happened to him?”

Sophia put her hand on her mother’s shoulder.
“I’ll call his friends.” She was dimly aware of Brock coming in
behind her as she approached the phone. Four very sleepy friends
later, Sophia started to panic. “He’s nowhere.
Nowhere
.”

Brock, who her mother had served coffee to,
came to her and took her hands. “He has to be somewhere.”

“We argued before bed,” Louisa said. “He was
mad at me.”

Again, she touched her mother’s shoulder.
“He’s mad at everybody these days, Mama.”

“Where does he usually go when he’s angry?”
Brock asked.

“To Antonio.” This from Louisa. Her mom had
not been in favor of Tony moving out, but she’s supported Sophia
anyway.

“Yes!” Sophia said, grabbing her husband’s
house keys from the drawer.

“You’re still stressed,” Brock said,
following her out. “I’m driving.”

“Whatever. Let’s go. Mama, keep calling
Miguel’s cell.”

The streets were deserted on the drive to
Tony’s, with only a few cars passing them. The eerie time before
dawn chilled her. Brock was silent for a while, then he asked,
“He’s not living at home?”

“No.”

“For how long?”

“Two weeks or so. But, Brock, I don’t want to
talk about my problems with Tony.”

When they reached Brody O’Malley’s street,
then his house, Sophia gasped.

On the porch stoop, under a dim light, sat
Miguel.

“Thanks for seeing me, Chief. On such short
notice.” Tony tried to keep the weariness out of his voice, the
fear, but he wasn’t sure he succeeded. His shoulders were heavy
with fatigue and his heart about crushed by his mission here.

From behind his office desk, Noah Callahan
smiled kindly at Tony. “Of course I’d see you. You’re a valued
member of this department.”

Now, that hurt.
Jesús,
the guy never
told him that directly before. “Thanks.”

“Can I get you coffee?”

The scent hovered around Tony, but it turned
his stomach. He shook his head.

“Are you here about this morning’s fire? I
know you and Syd were trapped in an attic and the blaze was
incendiary. If I were you, I’d be pissed as hell that somebody
deliberately set you up.”

The incident
had
scared the shit out
of him and not merely because it took so long to be rescued. The
fire had gotten worse and not better. But Sydney had been really
scared, and he was shocked. She was always so tough. The remnants
of the well-rescue-gone-awry were still with her.

“It was a bitch all around, and yeah, I’m
pissed. But nobody was hurt and I think they got more information
on the torch. I’m here, to…” he looked down at the floor, toeing
the leg of Noah’s desk. At the thought of what he was about to do,
his gut clenched and his heart twisted in his chest. But this was
no time for recriminations. What choice did he have after all that
had happened? If he wanted to save his family, he had to do
this.

“…to apply for an instructor’s position at
the Academy.”

Literally, the chief’s mouth dropped. “This
is a surprise. I thought you liked being on the line.”

“I do. There are reasons to transfer.”

The chief frowned. “I have to ask. Are they
physical?”

“What? Oh, no. I’m healthy as a horse.”

Sitting back, Noah steepled his fingers. “Can
you tell me why you made this decision?”

How specific should he be? He couldn’t tell
the chief how, when he’d gone to Brody’s duplex after the
nightmarish call, he’d found his wife clinging to another man and
his son shivering on his front steps. Though he’d been sick at the
thought of Sophia turning to Carrington, Miguel had been his
primary concern.

“My family. They’re not doing well with my
job.”

“I’m sorry. The hours are better at the
Academy and you can get time off more easily.”

“It’s more than that, Chief, but truthfully,
I can’t talk about it.”

The man he respected a lot watched him. “I
see. Well, then…” He took out a folder and opened it. “We’ve filled
two spots for training the recruit class, so two more are open.
You’d be a real asset to them, having recently come off the
line.”

“When does it start?”

“October seventh.”

“So soon?”

Setting down the folder, the chief’s gaze
narrowed. “Tony, don’t you want to make this move?”

Tony glanced out the window, where the wind
had picked up and was blowing the trees. Finally, he answered. “I
got no choice, Chief. I’ll take the position if you’ll have
me.”

“Of course I will.” The chief was thoughtful.
“On one condition.”

Not more demands. Tony wasn’t sure if he
could take much more. “What is it?”

Callahan leaned over the desk. “Look, I can
see you’re conflicted by this choice. And I know a lot about
conflict. In the job and in relationships and how the two clash
sometimes. Often when we’re in the middle of things, we can’t
always see our way clear. You can have the job, but I want you to
talk to Jack Harrison at some point about what’s going on with
you.”

Tony was going to object but kept his mouth
shut. It’d probably help to be able to be honest with somebody,
totally honest and totally selfish. “Yeah, okay. That sounds like a
good idea.”

The chief nodded. “Then, glad to have you on
board. And remember, this is for the recruit class that lasts four
months. We can decide what will happen permanently in
February.”

Tony scowled. “What about my position on
Rescue 7? That’ll have to be filled.”

“Actually, I have some officers I’d like to
rotate in and out of the Rescue Squad for the experience. We can
cover for you for the time the class runs.”

He’d never expected this. And he wasn’t sure
the gift made his move easier or harder to accept. In any case, his
part was done. He stood and so did the chief.

“Stop by HR on your way out. I’ll call
down.”

“Thanks, Chief. I really appreciate you
shuffling the schedule around for me.”

“People care about you in the department,
Tony. And want you to be happy.”

He swallowed hard and couldn’t respond.
Instead, he started out. At the door, he turned back. “Can I tell
my group myself? We’re off for four days, but I can get them
together.”

“Sure, go ahead.”

After wading through the paperwork, Tony left
the Academy and got in his truck. But he just sat there, on this
beautiful Indian Summer day, feeling like thunderclouds had
descended on his life. He couldn’t believe he’d given up the job
he’d loved since he was eighteen. It hurt so bad he started to
choke on the grief. So, he made himself think back to last
night.…

“What’s going on here?” he’d asked, his fists
curling at his sides at the sight of his wife standing so close to
Carrington. He hadn’t known then that Miguel had run away.

Sophia raised her chin, but her lips were
trembling. “Miguel came here after they all went to bed.”

“Here,
hijo?
You knew I was working
nights.”

Miguel glanced away. Tony looked to Sophia.
She shook her head, indicating she didn’t know what was going on,
either. So he dropped down next to his son on the porch. For a
minute, Miguel sat there, staring at the ground, then he pivoted
and threw himself into Tony’s arms. “I gotta be with you, Dad. It’s
not right you live alone. I wanna move in with you.”

“
Aw, son
,”
he whispered,
clasping on to the boy. “Shh. I’ll make everything all right again.
I promise.…”

The memory of why he was going off the line
gave him strength. He sat up straight in the car and turned on the
engine. He’d done the right thing for his family, and that’s all
that mattered.

oOo

Late morning of the day after Miguel had run
away, Sophia paced the garden at their home. Marianna had gone to
school, and her mother had taken Miguel to her house to sleep so
she and Tony could talk. They’d taken a nap, but he was gone when
she awoke. As Sophia had waited for him to return, she’d made the
mistake of turning on the news. Damn it. He’d been caught in the
arson’s trap, as she feared would happen, and this time, he almost
didn’t get out. She’d known a terror so great it immobilized her.
So she came out here hoping the fresh air would make it easier to
breathe. But today she couldn’t appreciate the fall chrysanthemums,
the blue mist shrubs or the tinge of fall in the air.

“Soph?”

Turning to the house, she saw him in the
doorway, holding a mug of the coffee she’d made. She said, “Hi. I
was worried.”

“Now, that’s an understatement, isn’t
it?”

She couldn’t read his mood. When he came out
onto the deck, she saw that his face was ravaged and for once, he
didn’t look good. There was the bleakest expression in his eyes—one
she’d only seen once before. Not when they were fifteen and she’d
told him she was pregnant. But when she’d lost their baby.
“Tony
,
what is it?”

“We have to talk.”

“I know about the arson. It was all over the
news.”

Wearily, he settled in a chair under one of
the umbrella tables. She dropped down adjacent to him and picked up
his hand. It was really cold. “I’m so sorry about Miguel.”

“That’s not your fault,
carina.
”

“Yes, it is. I was the one who insisted you
leave. I keep making decisions based on my fears and I’m hurting
everybody I love.”

“It doesn’t matter anymore.”

“What do you mean?”

He stared ahead.

“Oh, no, Tony, if you want a divorce, I swear
I won’t give you one. I’ll fight for you.”

That brought a sardonic smile to his lips.
“No, no divorce. I’m going off the line,” he said, his voice
cracking on the last word. “I took a job this morning at the
Anderson County Fire Academy.”

“What? Why didn’t you discuss this with me
before you made your final decision?”

“
Querida,
we’ve been discussing this
forever. After Miguel, after getting trapped, after…never mind
that.… We couldn’t go on this way.”

“Oh, Tony.”

“It’s okay. I’ll be teaching a recruit class
that starts next week.” He tried to smile. “It’ll be fun. Like I
said, teaching’s the job I would have picked if I wasn’t a
firefighter.”

Forcefully, she quelled any tears.
He
was the one suffering now. “I—I know this isn’t what
you want.”

“I
want
my family back. Quitting the
line is the only way to get it.”

She couldn’t speak because of the lump around
her throat.

He stared at her. Finally, he said, “It’ll
work out. I promise.” He stood. “I’m whipped. I couldn’t sleep when
you did. If I don’t get some zees, I’m gonna collapse.”

She asked, “Want me to come?”

“No, love, really, I gotta sleep.”

With shoulders slumped, his gate uneven, Tony
made his way into the house. Sophia sat on the deck, staring after
him, thinking that for a woman who’d gotten what she wanted, she
was absolutely miserable.

oOo

His group dropped everything to meet Tony
later that afternoon. Which only made the task at hand harder. Syd
had to get a sitter, the O’Malley boys and their women were taking
their parents’ boat out of the water for the winter and Gabe had
planned a day with Rachel. Still they came through the door of
Badges willingly.

“Hey,
hombre,
you okay?” Gabe’s tone
was concerned, though he looked relaxed and happy. “You said you
were, but you sounded ‘off’ on the phone.”

Bleakly, Tony wondered how long he would be
off.

“Nope, I’m fine. But I gotta tell you all
something and I wanted to do it together and not in the
firehouse.”

After O’Malley slapped him on the back, and
Syd kissed his cheek, they ordered a pitcher of beer and snagged a
table. He must look like shit, but nobody teased him and they were
unusually subdued. Tony prayed to God he could get through this
without breaking down. These people were his family, too, and he
was giving them up for Sophia and the kids. He placed a hand over
his heart which pulsed with angina-like pain.