Annabella's Oblivion (Hard World Tour #1) (21 page)

“
Can I come with you?” I had no idea where it came from, but suddenly the party and everything else sounded unappealing.

He blinked several times and his mouth opened in shock, as though it was the last thing he’d expected. I felt bad; maybe he didn’t want me with him, and here I was ruining his evening plans. He already had to attend a party that made him uncomfortable, and now this.

“
Sorry, I shouldn’t have asked. Have a nice evening.”

“
No, I mean, I would be happy if you joined me.”

“
Really?”

“
Yes.”

“
Let me just grab my jacket, and I’ll be good to go.”

I was about to have ice cream with Ryan.

I had no idea what I was doing, but for some reason, I was excited.

Annabella

I woke up slightly groggy and blinked, trying to understand where the hell I was.

After my practice session with Nate where I had sung a whole song, I needed time to collect my thoughts and myself. I ran to my room and, oddly enough, the minute I had seen my bed, I wanted nothing more than to lie down and fall asleep.

What I hadn’t expected was to remember Ryan, of all people, or that stupid party or where we went to have some ice cream. I tried not to think of that time or of him, but lately it had become difficult.

Nate and what he had done for me tonight was huge. When I had kissed him, so many emotions had washed through me.

I never wanted to let him go, and that scared me.

The tender moment we had shared in the studio reminded me of Ryan.

The way Nate played and looked while he doing so, it was like he felt every note deep in his body. It was like he gave himself away to the music and felt the same pleasure I did. It was amazing; it was why I loved to create music so much.

Ryan was the only other guy with whom I’d had that connection.

Before I blew it.

I was good at that, at blowing things. I would probably do the same here, but there was no stopping me from my feelings.

I checked the time and found it was around four o’clock, which meant I’d slept for only a few hours. I felt beaten up, and I needed to freshen up before Drake came. We had our usual appointment today, and I really wanted to talk to him.

I quickly washed my face and made myself more presentable before heading downstairs to grab a sandwich. I knew Marie was out buying groceries. She did it every other day at the same time, so I wouldn’t be bombarded with tons of questions.

Nate wasn’t anywhere in sight, and to be honest, I wasn’t looking for him. I needed a break from him, and us.

Yeah, because clearly there was an us now.

Finally, it was time, and I went to the room and sat down on the couch.

After a few minutes, Drake entered, looking as calm and friendly as always.

“
Hey,” I said, and he smiled.

“
Hello, Bella.” He sat down opposite to me, took out his tablet, and smiled. “Ready for our session?”

“
Oddly, yes. Today I’m ready.” He didn’t show any kind of emotion and let me continue. “Something happened today,” I said carefully.

“
What exactly?”

“
I sang a song.” He made a note.

“
How did it happen?”

“
Nate and I, well, we, or rather, he played the piano and I sang. He…he didn’t let me use Nick’s guitar.”

“
Your.”

I looked at him, confused.

“
What?”

“
Your guitar.”

“
Yeah, my guitar.” I guess I was so used to calling it Nick’s guitar that it was hard to change. In our previous sessions, Drake told me to start doing that. It was important, according to him. Maybe he was right. “Anyway, it was hard, and it wasn’t my best performance ever, but still, I managed to sing the whole song and I couldn’t do it before.” He nodded.

“
How did it make you feel?”

“
It was…liberating. Yes, that’s the word. I felt relieved because I still could do it. And at the same time, I have no idea what to do with it now.” I licked my dry lips. “I want to do it again, but would I be able to with anyone but Nate?” I saw understanding in his eyes and he put his notepad on the table.

“
Are you afraid of the connection you are forming?”

“
I know it makes no sense. I’ve known him for such a short time and everything, but I feel safe with him and it scares me. What if I rely on him too much? I want to learn to be on my own.”

“
I see. Is this the only reason, or is there more?”

There was more, but I wasn’t sure I should talk about it.

I was afraid to voice my feelings.

But maybe I had to.

“
He reminds me of a guy I used to know. His name was Ryan, and he was one of Nick’s closest friends.” Drake gave me an odd look but said nothing. “I had this feeling today, the feeling of closeness that I only used to feel with Ryan.”

“
Was Ryan your friend?” I shook my head and looked to the side to the view outside. The weather was becoming way better. Spring was slowly touching down on Texas, and that made me smile. I loved warm weather.

“
We weren’t friends. We actually never spent much time together except—” Well, shit. That part was hard to talk about.

“
Except what?”

“
Except that one night we had in New York almost four years ago.”

“
A one-night stand.”

That made me angry and ashamed at the same time. Because he wasn’t a one-night stand, but I had treated him like one. Suddenly, I didn’t want to talk about it anymore.

“
It’s okay, Bella, to feel a connection to people—to feel. You are not dead.”

Yeah, maybe he was right. I wasn’t dead…was I?

“
Then why am I afraid?”

“
Maybe because you are afraid to lose again.”

“
Like Nick, you mean?”

“
Do you feel like you lost him?”

That was the whole point of these sessions, wasn’t it? For me to admit that I did, but no matter how much I tried, I just couldn’t do that.

I didn’t want to do that.

“
I don’t know what to say.”

The truth was I had no idea what to do or say about a lot of things.

And that shit was scary, too.

Ryan

“
I don’t care, Steve. I need all the information about the hotel’s performance for the last month in an hour.”

“
But, Ryan—”

“
One hour, Steve, or you can consider yourself fired.”

Without hearing another word, I hung up the phone.

Steve was one of my father’s right-hand guys and was used to having a lot of power in his hotel business chain. Well, not anymore. My father had given me the power seat as CEO six months ago, and since then, it was nothing but an ongoing battle. No one had wanted to change the old ways, and no one wanted to do as I said, but with time, they were learning that they had to. I hated the whole hotel business. I was content with the job I had. But for the sake of my parents, I had agreed to do this whole shit, but only if I had full control.

It was hard to manage it now when I was away, but with my few trips there and conference calls, it was doable. I leaned back in my chair, closed my eyes, and exhaled. I was exhausted and needed to rest, but I knew, even if I tried to lie down, it would be useless.

At least, until I saw her.

She had run away so fast, but after some time, I went up to check on her. She was sound asleep. She looked so peaceful that I stayed, like some kind of creeper, and watched her sleep for a while. I then put a blanket over her and left the room to get some work done.

I heard a knock on the door and it made me open my eyes.

“
Come in.” I rubbed my eyes and saw Drake enter the room. Well, that was a surprise. “Hey, man.”

“
Hey,” he said and sat without further invitation. Drake and I had a rather difficult relationship, to put it mildly. He was my father’s older son, which meant a son from his first wife. Drake was older than me by two months, and the funny thing was, he was a genius child, just like me. Dad had to have really good DNA, although Drake took his time and didn’t hurry as much as I did. He got his degree at twenty-two and had then started his practice. He usually worked for non-profit organizations.

Much to our dad’s disappointment, Drake had wanted nothing to do with the hotels and made it very clear. He even insisted on giving me the reins.

Still, he was a major shareholder and did some business on the side.

I wouldn’t have asked for his help with Bella, if it wasn’t for the fact I knew he was perfect for the job.

“
To what do I owe this visit?” It wasn’t hard to read the sarcasm in my voice; he refused to even acknowledge me when I asked about her health. He preferred to send me e-mails, but here he was.

He studied me for several seconds and finally spoke.

“
What the fuck are you doing?” Of all the things I had expected him to ask, this question wasn’t one of them.

“
What do you mean?”

“
With Bella. What the fuck are you doing?”

“
I’m helping her out. What does it look like I’m doing?”

“
She told me today that she played with you.” Ah, so little one spoke about our music.

“
And?”

“
She seems happy that she is playing again. You see, you remind her of a guy she had a moment with.” Everything in me froze and my fists became tight. I had no desire to hear about some guy she used to date, and now I reminded her of him?

Fucking great.

“
I see.”

“
She said he was her brother’s best friend.” I snapped my eyes to him and he grinned. “His name was Ryan. Since you were such a good friend of Nick’s, I thought I’d ask you if you know a Ryan by any chance…Ryan?”

She remembered me?

As far as I knew, the night we had spent together had meant nothing to her.

She certainly was very vocal about it.

“
What do you want, Drake?” He wanted the admission it was me, and I wouldn’t give it to him.

“
I just want to make sure you know what you’re doing.” If I thought he cared about what I was up to, I would have sworn there was concern in his eyes.

“
I know.”

“
Okay, little brother.” With those words, he left the room, leaving me fucking confused.

Why did he feel the need to let me know about this incident? Didn’t they have some kind of confidentiality agreement?

I was fucked-up. I had to tell her the truth if she’d started to connect me with Ryan.

But I couldn’t.

Because the minute she learned the truth, it would be the end of this.

And as healthy as she was now, she still needed my help.

Once she was good to go, I would let her.

But that wouldn’t be my choice, either.