Annabella's Oblivion (Hard World Tour #1) (49 page)

“
She went to see Megan, and then one thing kind of led to another, and the band will have a free concert here in a week. They’re kind of busy with preparations and, you know, no one wants you to distract her with your shit.” I sat down because it was a bit too much information. She hated that town; why would she do it for the townsfolk? It wasn’t a bad place, but maybe seeing her nephew changed her perspective on a lot of things.

“
I have to say I’m surprised.”

“
We all were, but, apparently, it’s a charity thing and folks in town are excited. It’s to build a new school or something. I didn’t really care that much for details. Even the press is coming. So stay put for now, okay, brother?” He wasn’t amused anymore and his voice was serious. I understood he really was asking me to stay away, all jokes aside.

She needed it. For some reason, I knew it was part of her healing, and since when did I refuse anything for my girl?

“
I got you. I’ll see you then.”

I hung up the phone and palmed my face. I thought about the mess I’d been these past few days and how I had to set some shit straight.

I had one week.

I hoped like fuck she would still be willing to give me a chance then.

If not, then, well, it would make it all the more difficult, but I would still fight for our happy ending.

Because I had no desire to live a life full of regrets.

Not anymore.

Annabella

I tried to calm my nerves as the cheering of the crowd was getting louder and louder. My palms were sweaty, and I checked myself one last time in the mirror.

I had on my usual makeup for the performance’s sake. Smoky eyes, jeans, shirt, jacket, and boots. My hair was done in a ponytail and I looked as if I was ready to conquer the world, when inside I felt anything but.

We’d been getting ready for this for the past week. It took some organizing since I came up with it, but Jeremy took over the reins. All we had to do was plan the performance, but the girls helped me out there.

I tried to reach Ryan, but it was useless. I hoped he would be here, but if he wasn’t, there was always the news, right?

The press was here. They all wanted to have the opportunity to cover the event live; after all, we hadn’t been seen in public all together in almost a year.

Jer scheduled the conference for tomorrow and made sure the questions would be only about the performance, no personal questions asked. I knew that probably wouldn’t be the case, but didn’t care that much. I wasn’t afraid of them.

Not anymore.

I knew Megan, Mathew—wearing headphones to protect his tender hearing—and the rest of the family had special seats by the arena.

“
You look good,” Sam said in a calming voice and gave me a hug. I just smiled at her, though it was forced.

“
I hope I can do it.”

“
I hope we all can do it.” Ariel came to us. She was taking longer to apply that damned lipstick of hers. “It’s not like we performed without you.”

“
Ariel, your words aren’t exactly reassuring.” Jane finally joined us, looking slightly disheveled. We studied her curiously and she blushed.

“
Someone finally had backstage sex, huh?” Ariel elbowed her, but she pushed her away.

“
Shut up. I didn’t have sex.” Jane’s voice was hushed.

“
Well, you had something.” It made me super happy that I had the opportunity to tease her about the guy.

“
Did not.”

“
Totally did.”

Jane was about to reply when Sam rolled her eyes and snapped. “Shut up, both of you. We can talk about if after the concert. Surprisingly, a lot of people showed up,” she mused, as she watched what was going on from our hiding place.

“
They probably came from all the nearest towns, too. After all, it is a charity concert, and so much attention. Damn, but I feel excited!” Ariel shouted and we all frowned at her. She just winked. “Come on! It’s like old times when we tried to get our gigs.” That brought a smile to my face, because it was true. We all loved our job and never took it for granted, but at some point, we lost this excitement we had before the performance, where everything felt raw and unconquered. That’s how we felt right now.

Maybe we did really need the break we had this year, though I wished it was for different reasons. But life, as I discovered, was too short to live in constant what-ifs.

Jo appeared, all nervous as usual. We had to summon her here, and she lost her shit, because she felt like we didn’t have enough time to prepare everything. But then we assured her that, after all, she was the best, so she could do it.

“
Showtime, girls. Cell phones.” I checked my phone one last time, but there was nothing. After Jer had given it back to me, I snuck Ryan’s number from his, but he never picked up. I sent him tons of messages, but they were unanswered.

It didn’t change tonight, either.

Jo took everything and, with hectic hand movements, sent us on stage. We quickly moved by the steps, and the minute we were on the stage, the screams became so loud that I almost felt like covering my ears. I was unused to it after the year break.

We knew our routine and did it perfectly. I came closer to the mic, adjusted it, and calmed myself.

It was a stage, after all, my second home. How could I forget how comfortable it felt?

“
Hello, Moonlight Rose!” I screamed loudly, and the cheers erupted around us as I sent them my signature smile.

“
Ariel! Ariel! Ariel!” She came closer, took out her white napkin, kissed it swiftly, and threw it to the crowd.

As always, everyone went wild to get it, and she blew them one more kiss in the air. The girls took their positions.

“
Before we start our concert, I would like to say something to everyone, and if I can ask for silence, please.” Slowly, the cheers and screams settled down and I gazed at the audience. People were curious, and I took a deep breath because it was a turning point in my life, and I was happy to finally do it.

“
We weren’t in public much this year. As you know, I suffered a deep loss.” My voice shook a bit, but I continued. “I lost my brother. He was an amazing person, and I wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for him. I want him to be remembered as a great brother. I never write songs. That job has always belonged to Jane.” I took a pause and there were whistles for her and I clapped along. “But I wrote a song and my girls composed the music. I would like to share it with you and dedicate it to one of the best men I ever knew, Nick Hastings.” The crowd was silent and I gave the sign to the girls to start. Sam began to play on her guitar and Ariel joined her. Then Jane as well. My slightly raspy voice rang out to accompany them. The song was soft and slow, and the words came from deep inside me.

It’s in the middle of the night

I sit out here thinking to myself

How will it ever be all right
…

Without you.

Those words aren’t good
…
Enough

I’d run to you if I could

I miss those days when I would

Spend them with you.

I wanna let you know

It’s hard to let you go

I’m sitting here alone

And trying to move on

You used to light up my sky

You and I, you said we could fly

Over the world way up, up high

I need you here, I need you now

I need you here, I need you now

My eyes were closed the entire time and all I saw was Nick and all the memories we had together. My voice shook at the end of the song, but I managed to pull it off. It was my sort of good-bye to him, my sort of showing my appreciation for everything he’d done for me. There were tears running down my cheek, but I didn’t try to hide them. They were part of me and my pain. Pain that would always stay, but I could live with it.

I could live in a world he no longer existed in.

I knew I would survive.

I finally opened my eyes and the audience seemed to snap out of their trance. Loud cheers erupted, and since it was dark, I saw lots of mobile phones lighting up. There were also screams of approval and applause. I wiped my tears away and cleared my throat.

“
Thank you. I hope Nicky looks down at me and is happy with what he sees.” I grabbed the mic harder in my hand and continued with the second thing I had planned for tonight. “I wouldn’t be able to be here if it wasn’t for another man as well. I have been to hell and back, and he was with me all the way. You see, he was always it for me, but I just realized it recently, and I hope it’s not too late to admit it.” I took a deep breath and smiled. “Ryan Jackson, I love you, and I want to thank you for being there for me. You see, I can live without you. I just don’t want to. I don’t ever want to.” There were whistles and more cheers. “Well, I didn’t write a song for you,” I joked, and the audience laughed. “But that doesn’t change anything. I love you.” The last words were said in a whisper that was loud enough for everyone to hear.

I had no idea whether he was here or not, whether he cared or not. But I was free.

Free to love, to choose, and to believe.

“
Okay, now that the emotional stuff is out of the way, how about we kick it off with an all-time favorite song?” Now the screams were deafening, and thank God I had to sing, because to hear anything would have been a hard job.

I looked back at my girls and they all smiled as they raised their hands in the classic rock sign. I just rolled my eyes.

We were back.

“
Let’s rock the stage, people!”

Ryan

“
Well, bro, that was really romantic. I’d have anxiety issues if I were you. You know, to top that is a hard job,” Drake said, and Jer smirked, finding it too damned hilarious.

I came late, but I was there. I joined Jeremy, Drake, and Megan, who watched the performance from the best place. I had made it in time for her speech about Nick.

Damn, that song.

I could feel all her emotion from down here, and all I wanted to do was go there, hold her in my arms, and hug her.

I came here to beg her to take me back, or kidnap her and convince her we were meant to be.

Both seemed like great solutions to me, so whatever. I decided to do what was necessary.

What I didn’t expect was what came after.

Ryan Jackson, I love you.

They were the words I’d wanted to hear from her forever.

I stood there, frozen, and had no idea what to do, but watch my girl with fascination. She was a bit afraid, I could tell, but there was this sureness in her eyes. She was okay with what she said, and she was only nervous because she wasn’t sure about saying those words out loud.

The girls started to play a familiar song, and the crowd went crazy, if it was possible, because they were already out of control.

She picked up her mic and started to sing, raising her other hand in the timing of Jane’s drums.

‘
In this whole wide world, there is no one like you

So giving up doesn’t sound like something you’d do

Get up, fight, show ‘em what you’re all about

They don’t have a say of whether you’re worthy or not

‘
Cause those who matter will never mind

And those who mind will never matter

Just be yourself

You’re one of a kind