Authors: Sue Lilley
Reminiscing had made Joe horny. Not the most convenient feeling, when you were driving in such dangerous weather. And what was it with women and silence? They just didn’t get it. Lisa had been chattering the whole way about nothing. It would be a relief to actually get there.
“We’re almost in York. Do you know where we’re going? The one-way system can be a nightmare.”
Lisa fished a scrap of paper from the pocket of her jeans but recited the address without having to read it. How bloody typical! Almost next door to his sister’s place. Could it get any worse? He could hardly drive past the door without calling in and the last thing he wanted at the moment was family chit-chat.
“If I send you an invitation, will you to come to my wedding?”
“What wedding?”
He’d snapped without thinking. He saw Lisa was biting her lip and felt mean for being cross with her. Beneath the bravado, she was a scared young girl wanting the fairy tale. It wasn’t her fault she was bringing back memories he’d rather forget.
While he’d been trying to concentrate on the road, she’d been putting on make-up. Far too much in Joe’s opinion but it wasn’t for him to say. He wasn’t the poor sod about to get an unplanned visit.
“Maybe you should try not to get your hopes up.”
“Simon’s got to marry me, Joe. Or my mother’s going to kill me.”
“But maybe you should have a back-up plan, just in case?”
“What do you mean?”
Did he really have to spell it out for her? Tell her she was probably a casual shag that the guy could barely remember? He was hardly going to be thrilled by a pregnant schoolgirl turning up on his doorstep. Joe knew all about that. The guy hadn’t even told her he’d moved. She was only here because Simon’s mother, of all people, had given out his address to get rid of her.
“You haven’t seen him since March, right?”
“But we text all the time.”
Joe stopped himself asking how long it had been since the last text. She didn’t need to feel any worse. But when it all went horribly wrong, no doubt he’d be the one picking up the pieces and he’d only just met the girl. It was looking less likely he’d get to Cornwall today, the weather was so bad it had taken ages to get even this far.
“Look Lisa, I only meant he’s going to need time to get used to the situation. And parents are programmed to deal with trouble. Maybe your mother will be more understanding than you think.”
“She’ll be more understanding when I tell her I’m getting married.”
Joe suspected a shotgun wedding at sixteen would be hardly less of a blow to Lisa’s mother, but he kept that to himself.
“Anyway, here we are. Welcome to York, my home town.”
He knew he didn’t sound enthusiastic. But even after living away for years, the first sight of the golden stone walls always managed to make him feel trapped.
“You never mentioned that.”
“I thought I just did. My four sisters are all still here but I don’t come back unless I have to.”
“I always wanted a sister.”
“You can have one of mine.”
Another one of his jokes she didn’t laugh at. If he wasn’t careful he’d be getting a complex.
Even on a wet Sunday, nothing much had changed. The same mad traffic in the wrong lanes. The same tour buses holding everything up and the same flaky tourists nearly being run over with their cameras and dinky little maps.
“Simon will be pleased to see me, won’t he? Do you think he’ll want me to move in with him?”
Joe’s stomach plunged down to his feet. He was hardly the poster boy for responsible behaviour. What could he tell her?
“Like I said, he might need some time. It’s bound to be a shock. I’d plan on going home anyway, if I were you. Just for the time being. I’ll take you, like we said.”
“Okay, maybe if you think that’s best. Do I look alright?”
He could hardly say he thought she was prettier without the make up. Simple Simon, if he remembered her at all, would have seen her with full slap, looking older and well up for a shag.
“I’m sure he’ll be bowled over.”
Hopefully, if not bowled over, at least human enough for a kind word. Looked like he had a bit of cash. These warehouse conversions were all sandblasted brick and glossy black metal, balconies lined up along the river. Probably the type with more cash than sense. But what could Joe say about that? He’d never had either.
He pulled up outside the smart entrance to the block. She opened the door but was obviously terrified as she picked up her backpack and clutched it like a shield.
“Still time to change your mind?”
“I’ll be fine. Don’t wait.”
“You’re joking. What if there’s nobody in? And what about my lucky jacket?”
“Sorry, I forgot about that.”
She started to take it off but he couldn’t let her meet the guy bra-less and desperate. Did she have no idea what she looked like?
“It’s okay, keep it on for now. I’ll get it back later, when you’re sorted.”
He scribbled his number on the back of a paper napkin. “Ring me as soon as you like, okay? I’ll be waiting at my sister’s place, just further along the river.”
She took the napkin and got out of the car. “Thanks. But will you go now?”
What could he do but drive away, feeling like a twat for letting her face it on her own? He should have gone with her but it was too late now. He couldn’t even see if she’d gone in, due to the inconvenient bend in the road as he drove along the quay to Heather’s place.
Heather wasn’t that thrilled to see him, but he’d been expecting the little dig about not being in touch since Christmas. He left all that family stuff to Evie. But she did make him tea, in a china pot, taking after their mother with her unreasonable hatred of tea bags. He told her his version of the latest.
“Evie wouldn’t just fancy a few days on her own in Cornwall. She finally left you, didn’t she?”
“What do you mean, finally? She’s just in a strop. I’m on my way down there to sort things out. Bloody cottage doesn’t even have a phone and she forgot to take her mobile.”
“Maybe she left it on purpose because she doesn’t want to speak to you?”
“Why? What do you know about it? I didn’t come here for an ear bashing.”
Heather slid some ginger snaps onto a plate and carried the tray over to the sofa, its cushions a splash of statement lime green in the otherwise monochrome room. Joe sat down, wishing he’d just waited in the car.
“What did you come for, sympathy? Did you expect her to carry on forever, turning a blind eye to your womanising ways?”
“My what? Don’t I get to put my side of the story?”
“And what would your side be? Golden boy of the family, always the centre of attention. You’re my little brother and I love you. But sometimes you can be such a prick.”
“Thanks, Heather. Make me feel worse, why don’t you? I know Evie looks out for everybody and I take her for granted.”
Heather snatched a biscuit from the plate and snapped it with such force Joe decided he’d better keep quiet and drink his tea.
“It’s not just that. Evie’s my friend, remember. We do talk. She suspected you were up to your old tricks again.”
“Did she, now?”
“It’s not funny, Joe. She gets upset.”
“Believe me, I’m not laughing. I suppose she just couldn’t wait to tell you I’m out of a job?”
“She didn’t tell me, actually. But let me guess what happened. You got caught tomming about? Jesus! Are you ever going to grow up?”
“It wasn’t like that. I left. I thought I’d walk into something better.”
“Do I need three guesses?”
“What do you want me to say? I cocked up but it’s nothing that couldn’t be talked about. She didn’t have to run off like that.”
“Typical of you to think it’s trivial.”
“I don’t, not exactly. But it’s hardly the end of the world. You might not believe me but I want to make things right. That’s why I’m driving down there after her.”
“Yet here you are drinking tea instead of blasting down the motorway?”
“I’m giving somebody a lift. Just waiting for a call and then I’ll be out of your hair.”
He didn’t want to explain about Lisa. Heather already looked sceptical and she’d always had the knack of putting him in the wrong.
He got up and stalked across the open plan room to the balcony doors. Hands stuffed in his pockets, he stared out at the river. It was deserted, the tourists driven inside by the rain which pitted the surface of the murky water. Where the fuck was Lisa? He wanted to be on his way.
He checked the phone in his pocket. No calls yet. Was that a good sign, he wondered? Maybe he should go back out to look for her?
“Oh, come and sit down. You’re making me nervous. And there’s something I’ve been wanting to tell you.”
Heather refilled his mug and handed it to him as he sat down beside her, only half listening to what she was saying. He’d have this tea and go, he decided. He really shouldn’t have left Lisa to face that guy on her own.
“I’m sorry if I was ratty with you. I’m a bit hormonal. Can you believe I’m actually pregnant? Fourteen weeks this time and over the dodgy stage at last.”
She rubbed the front of her striped jersey top, revealing the smallest bump. Joe didn’t know what to say. Or how he felt. Why, all of a sudden, did the whole world seem to be pregnant? He pulled himself together and kissed her.
“That’s great news. I’m over the moon for you. You’ve been waiting a long time.”
“After three miscarriages you start to think it’s never going to happen. I’ve been dying to tell Evie but I’ve been waiting for the right moment. It didn’t seem very tactful.”
“She’ll be happy for you.”
He realised he had no idea how Evie would feel. They’d never talked about what had happened.
“Steve’s thrilled, as you can imagine.”
“Yes, I guess he would be. Where is he anyway?”
“Amsterdam for a stag weekend. Due back on the afternoon flight, if they weren’t too hammered to catch their plane.”
“And you don’t mind?”
“Why should I mind? He isn’t you. He’d never do anything to jeapardise our future.”
“Lay it on thick, why don’t you. I know I haven’t been the perfect husband. Unlike yours, obviously.”
At one time Joe would have been first on the invite list for any stag do involving Steve. They’d been best mates. Except Joe had always resented Steve’s money. They weren’t in touch much now, other than through their wives. Maybe another set of fences for Joe to mend?
“He’s always been perfect for me,” Heather said, not biting. “Now that you’re here, you should stay, catch up?”
“Maybe.”
He wondered if he should take the chance to dip his toe in the icy water. There wasn’t much left of the afternoon anyway. If Lisa didn’t ring him soon, he’d already be pushing it to make it to Cornwall before dark.
“I had a text from Claire,” Heather was saying. “Italy with Granny for a birthday treat? She’s a lucky girl.”
Joe didn’t know they had the text thing going on. Had he been living in a parallel universe?
“I don’t want Claire upset by any of this. It’s been a difficult year for all of us but she’s young to have to cope with all that trauma. She deserves her treat and it needs to be sorted before she gets back.”
“I have to say this for you, after the balls-up you made at the beginning, you haven’t done too bad at being a father.”
“Careful. That’s almost a compliment.”
“Let’s not get carried away. She’s only thirteen. There’s more than enough time for you to screw up again.”
It was on the tip of his tongue to ask how well Steve would have coped with a baby at nineteen. But he already knew what the answer to that would be. Steve, brought up to respect family pride and tradition, wouldn’t have shoved his head in the sand.
“Actually, we’re planning a trip to Cornwall next weekend,” Heather said. “We’re telling the in-laws about the baby. And we’ll be discussing the possibility of us moving down there.”
“What, permanently? You? What would you do for shopping?”
“There’s always the internet. Anyway I’m sure I’ll have more important things on my mind. Steve’s folks haven’t been in the best of health lately and I don’t think they can cope with the business any more. Or that ridiculous big house. Steve would hate to see it sold outside of the family.”
“What about big brother Malcolm?”
“I suspect Malcolm will be pleased to have the problem off his hands. He’s too busy making dosh in the City. And we can hardly go on living here, can we? You can imagine a toddler climbing those railings and ending up in the river. Anyway, having a baby changes most people’s priorities.”
Joe drained the last of his tea, ignoring the little dig.
“Do you want something to eat? I’ll be cooking for Steve anyway. He’s bound to have the munchies after all that booze. You didn’t say, who’s this friend you’re waiting for?”