Apple's Angst (17 page)

“I don't know. Maybe he had the urge to watch some men in tights or something. Maybe he really was just in the area and it popped into his head,” Apple suggested.

“I think he likes you,” Lyon said. “I think he now has a crush on you, or maybe he always did.”

“Hello? You're acting crazy. He's with my best friend Happy, remember? And he didn't like me, remember?” Apple argued.

“So?” Lyon asked. “Things change. People have changes of heart all the time.”

“Nothing has changed!” Apple said. She was starting to become annoyed. Since when had Lyon become so clingy and jealous?

“I'm not convinced,” Lyon said. He was pouting, and it wasn't a very sexy look for him.

“Can we please just go for dinner? I need to relax. I just finished my first week at work. And Crazy Aunt Hazel left me
twenty-two
messages today about helping her find the perfect wedding dress. She's stressing me
out. So please, Lyon,” Apple pleaded. “Please don't stress me out too!”

“Let's go,” Lyon said. “You're right. You had a hard week. I'm sorry.”

Apple couldn't help but notice there was still a slight edge to his voice. Why couldn't he see that, if anyone, she was the one who should be on edge?

Lyon took her to a sweet little bistro near Apple's home, one of their favorites.

Just as Apple felt herself starting to relax over tortilla chips and guacamole dip, Lyon brought up Zen again.

“I just get a weird vibe from the guy,” he said.

She really didn't want to be talking about Zen, but she had to stick up for him. She had known him much longer than she had Lyon.

“Really? He's one of the sweetest people I know,” Apple said. “He's always volunteering for something. He's just a nice guy.”

“Listen, Apple. I'm a guy. We know what other guys are like,” Lyon explained. “And I'm telling you, he wasn't there just to pick up a DVD. He wasn't happy to see us going out. He's trying to worm his way in between us. I just know it.”

Apple couldn't help but laugh, accidently spitting out some of the chip she had just taken a bite of.

“I'm being serious, Apple,” Lyon said.

“I didn't notice anything weird,” Apple responded, putting the half-eaten chip back on her plate. She had
suddenly lost her appetite, thanks to the way Lyon was acting, even though she had been starving just minutes ago.

“Well, what is he supposed to say?” demanded Lyon.

Apple didn't feel comfortable telling him the real reason Zen had come over, which was to ask her for advice about Happy. She hadn't told Lyon anything about Happy's new crush or how Happy wasn't into Zen anymore. That was their business.

“I think you're really seeing something that's not there. I really don't want to talk about this. It's so stupid,” Apple said. Her usual favorite meal, steak and French fries, arrived and it suddenly didn't look so appealing on the plate. She wished she had ordered a salad instead. Her stomach was in knots. She and Lyon had never fought before, and this felt like a fight. This was their first fight.

“All right, then. Let's go on a double date with Happy and Zen next week,” Lyon suggested, as if he was daring her.

Apple gulped. She couldn't think of anything she would rather not do. Who even knew if Happy and Zen would still be together next week? Apple knew that Happy had been avoiding Zen like the plague and continued to kiss Hot and Disturbed Guy before her sessions. For a minute, Apple thought of telling Lyon the truth about what was going on with Happy and Zen.

Apple knew that her aunt Hazel told her future husband—Mr. Kelly—everything about her friends. According to her aunt, there could be no secrets in a
relationship and if a friend told you something in confidence and you had a husband, obviously that friend knew you were going to share it with your partner.

Still, Apple felt in her gut that if she told Lyon Happy wasn't into Zen anymore, he'd just become more jealous and would really watch out for how Zen acted toward Apple and how Apple acted toward Zen, even if there was nothing to watch out for.

“Sure. If work doesn't get in the way. And if they're available,” Apple said, trying to placate Lyon.

“You'll make the time,” he said. “And of course they'll be available. She's your best friend! So it's a date.”

“Fine, it's a date. If that's what you need to see that Zen is NOT interested in me, then we'll do it. But you're being ridiculous,” Apple said, pushing her plate back and looking away from Lyon.

Lyon didn't respond. This romantic, relaxing dinner was a bust. But suddenly Apple wanted to fix it. She didn't want to be fighting with Lyon. She knew she hadn't been the best girlfriend over the last couple of days. She had forgotten to call him back so many times. She had bailed on lunch. She had been short with him. And, in Lyon's defense, Apple
had
once been in love with Zen. Maybe it was only natural for him to act this way.

“You're forgetting one thing,” Apple said.

“And what's that?” Lyon asked shortly.

“I'm interested in
you,”
Apple said as Lyon handed over his credit card to the waitress.

“Sometimes, Apple, I'm not so sure,” he said, much to Apple's shock. She had been trying to make up with him.

“What's that supposed to mean?” demanded Apple. She was trying to play nice, but Lyon wasn't playing nice back. She was losing her patience.

“You heard me,” he said, slipping Apple's coat over her arms as she stood up. Even when Lyon wasn't in a good mood, he was always the gentleman.

Apple had a response, but not one she would voice aloud to Lyon in a public restaurant.

“Listen, I've just been overwhelmed with the stress of this new job and school. It has nothing to do with you,” Apple said.

“Exactly,” said Lyon. “I feel like nothing in your life has to do with me anymore.”

She really didn't want to fight with Lyon. She had no idea what was happening to them. Even when she tried to be nice, they still kept on fighting. Lyon, she thought, was maybe waiting for some sort of deeper apology. What Apple wanted to say was that he was lucky she had even come out with him tonight. She had to be at
Angst
all the next day, and her aunt wanted to meet her after to go scout out some wedding dresses. Apple needed a good night's sleep.

They drove home in silence, until the silence became deafening. Apple turned on the radio. Lyon dropped her off and didn't even attempt to invite himself in. He didn't lean over to give her a goodnight kiss either—which was fine with Apple. She was in no mood to kiss him. She simply said, “Thanks for dinner,” and got out of the car.

Lyon had put Apple in what her aunt called her “Bad Apple” mood. Apple didn't want to talk to anyone. She
didn't even have it in her to call Happy and tell her that Zen had stopped by, or to return Brooklyn's call, or to tell anyone that she was in the middle of her first fight ever with Lyon. She knew her aunt would be pissed off that she didn't return any of her twenty-two messages. Although no one was around, Apple couldn't help but slam her bedroom door.

I
t had been a strange day. Apple had arrived at
Angst
on Monday at 4:22 p.m. She had spent the entire weekend at
Angst
as well, holed up in the dungeon sorting mail, and was starting to feel more at home. She no longer felt nervous as she walked in. She had even brought her favorite water bottle, which she kept at her desk. People around the office now nodded a quick hello when Apple walked by.

“Good girl,” Morgan said, winking, tapping her fashionable pink watch. It had become somewhat of a joke between them: whenever Apple arrived now, Morgan pointed out the time.

“I know. I'm a fast learner. Is Emme here yet?” Apple asked.

“Of course! She arrived about an hour ago,” Morgan said. “We've never had an intern this ambitious before. Ever.”

“An hour ago?” Apple winced.

“She's eager,” Morgan said. “I mean, I guess that's a good thing.”

Apple was tired. She had stayed up until four in the morning reworking her advice column, which was due today.

Apple was still distraught over her Friday-night dinner with Lyon but had managed to put it in the back of her mind while concentrating on her advice column. They hadn't spoken for more than three minutes the rest of the weekend, which was fine by Apple. She didn't want to have to explain one more time that Zen wasn't into her. She didn't want to have to explain just how stressed she was feeling with this new job, falling behind on her schoolwork, and not being the perfect bridesmaid for her aunt.

Apple had woken up at 5 a.m. so her mother could read her answers for
Angst
. It wasn't cheating, Apple thought, when she first wondered if she should show her mother what she had worked on. It was simply getting help. After all, she didn't want to screw up on her first assignment. Plus, Apple knew it would make her mother feel needed. Besides, this was a perk of living in the same house with someone who had doled out relationship advice for almost two decades.

“Apple, this is good,” her mother had said, reading the page she had printed out. “Really good. You must have worked on this very hard. It's well written, well thought out, and very helpful.”

“Okay, but you must have some advice to give me. Something could be improved!” Apple demanded. “Give me something. You must have some criticisms. I won't be offended. Tell me the truth.”

“Honey, you have to be confident. And plus, this isn't exactly my demographic. These are your peers. Would the answers you wrote be answers you'd give to your friends?” her mother asked.

“I guess so. I didn't get to pick these questions, though. Michael gave them to me. I think they're made up,” Apple explained.

“Well, that's sometimes how it works. You know that Guy answers all my viewers' e-mails. Viewers think they're getting a response from me, but in reality they're not. It doesn't matter, though. Guy knows me better even than your father,” Dr. Berg said.

“Um, can we get back to me, please?” Apple asked.

“Honey, they're great. Really. They are. You do have a gift. I'm going to try not to take any kudos for that, but I think you may have inherited some of my talent!”

“Okay, Mom. You can go now,” Apple said. “I have to find something in my closet that's
Angst
-worthy to wear to the office. Last time, my sleeves were too long or something, and then my pants weren't the right length.”

Her mother had left for work and Apple had headed back to her room. The pull of her bed was too strong for her to resist.

I'll just lay here for a few minutes, she had thought to herself. After all, it was still only 6:45.

“What are you doing?” she had heard Hazel scream suddenly, right in her face. “I've been honking outside for five minutes. Why are you still in bed?”

“Oh, my God. What time is it? I just meant to go back to bed for a few minutes,” Apple moaned.

“Well, you are going to be late, sweetie. Here, throw on these,” her aunt said, tossing her a pair of jeans that had been lying over a chair.

“I can't wear those! Are you crazy? I'll be laughed right out of
Angst
if I wear those,” Apple responded huffily. Didn't her aunt know anything?

“Since when did you become a fashion queen? Go take a shower and I'll get an outfit together for you,” her aunt said. “Unlike some people who haven't yet found the time to help
me
pick out an outfit for the MOST IMPORTANT DAY OF MY LIFE.”

Apple knew that the best way of dealing with her aunt when she was in a rant was simply to ignore her comments.

“Fine. But nothing slutty. They don't like slutty. They like chic and sophisticated,” Apple said.

“Slutty? Me?” Crazy Aunt Hazel asked mockingly. “Make this the quickest shower you've ever had.”