Apprehension and Desire: A Tale of Pride and Prejudice (12 page)

Read Apprehension and Desire: A Tale of Pride and Prejudice Online

Authors: Ola Wegner

Tags: #Fiction, #Romance, #Historical, #Regency

As they finally reached their destination, Darcy needed to turn his eyes away from her so as not to be tempted to take her in his arms again, so attractive was she to him with  her cheeks flushed, her bosom heaving from the exertion, and her dark, chocolate curls escaping the pins because she had removed her bonnet much earlier.

“Pleasant view,” Darcy noted as she walked to the edge.

“Surely, it cannot be compared to the views of Derbyshire. My aunt, Mrs. Gardiner, was born and brought up there, and she always  praises the wild beauty of that county.”

“I cannot deny it. Where exactly did your aunt live in Derbyshire?”

Elizabeth turned to him. “Lambton.”

Darcy’s eyebrows shot up. “But it is only five miles from Pemberely.”

“I know, Aunt mentioned it when Mr. Wickham was introduced to her last December.”

The scowl altered Darcy’s features at hearing Wickham’s name. He hated the thought of this bastard anywhere near his Elizabeth. “I have heard that the militia is about to leave Meryton... within days,” he tried to keep his voice calm and detached.

“Yes, they are moving to Brighton for the summer,” she confirmed.

As the memories of July last year returned to him, how Wickham had nearly succeeded in ruining his sister, he did not register that Elizabeth stepped close to him, touching his arm to bring his attention.

“For a long time now, I have wanted to ask you about one matter.”

He gave her a warm look. “Yes.”

“It is about Mr. Wickham. He told me some things about you...,” she hesitated, “Very unfavourable ones.”

“What did he tell you?” Darcy barked, his voice losing all its soft tones.

Her eyes widened at his tone. “He complained that you unfairly refused him the living in the church that your late father had promised to him,” she explained quietly.

Darcy clenched his fists. “It is a gross untruth. I paid him off, three thousand pounds, and he never intended to become a parson in the first place. Wickham a clergyman, Good Lord!” he exclaimed, “He was more interested in gambling and womanizing.”

Elizabeth’s dark eyebrows frowned as she stared at him. Could it be possible that she did not believe his words? Did she think Wickham a victim?

“Elizabeth, I have a proof, the documents he signed. I do not have them on me, but I can send for them.”

Her expression was still uncertain. “I just do not understand,” she searched his face, “Why did he say such things about you to strangers, to me?”

“Elizabeth, I am not surprised. Wickham hates me. He was always jealous of me because I was the heir to Pemberley, and he only the steward’s son, though due to my father’s generosity, he was brought up as a gentleman.”

“He told me that your father loved him more than he did you and it was you who were jealous of him.”

Darcy began pacing, clenching and unclenching his fists. “He did tell you that, the bastard.” He grunted under his breath. “Did he also tell that last summer he attempted to ruin my sister? He talked her into elopement, convinced her of his love, and all because of her dowry. He wanted her thirty thousand pounds!”

Elizabeth gaped at him in shock. “But your sister is very young, a child.”

Darcy nodded. “She was barely fifteen then.”

“He should be prosecuted for it!” Elizabeth cried fiercely.

“No, I do not want anyone to know. You must understand that I want to keep it secret for Georgiana’s sake. I want her to forget and to protect her reputation.”

“You can trust my secrecy,” she assured.

Darcy nodded. “Thank you. You are the only person who knows about it, apart from Colonel Fitzwilliam, who is her second guardian.”

“How is she now?” Elizabeth asked after a moment, her expression one of true concern.

Darcy answered in a calmer voice. “She is a bit better, but still not how she used to be. Georgiana is shy by nature, we both are, but after what happened last summer, she became worse. I have hoped that you, with all your liveliness, will help her to open herself.”

“I would wish to meet her.”

“I would wish that too, but you must see that I cannot bring her here while Wickham is in Meryton.”

“Of course.” Elizabeth agreed as she walked to sit on the fallen tree trunk. “I am still shocked with what you have told me.” She shook her head, “What a cad he is!  And he pretends to be so agreeable, so charming.”

Darcy came closer, hovering over her. “Charm was something Wickham never lacked.”

She looked up at him. “I cannot imagine what you felt when you discovered his intentions.”

“It was one of the worst moments in my life, to say the least.”

Elizabeth took his hand and made him sit down next to her.

“I am so sorry that it happened to your sister and to you.”

Darcy looked into her dark, big eyes. He knew that Georgiana’s history had moved her tender heart, but did she really care?

“It is behind us,” he said curtly.

She squeezed his hand in both of her smaller ones.

“I just want Wickham forever out of our lives.” He cupped her cheek, “Promise you will be careful when you see him.  It would be best to not talk to him at all. I fear that he will try to hurt you somehow, now that he has surely learned about us.”

She nodded. “I promise. I shall do my best to avoid him.”

 

Chapter Nine

 

“Lizzy, Lizzy, come here.” Mrs. Bennet hissed, widening her large blue eyes even more as she stood on the doorstep to her bedroom.

Elizabeth, already dressed in her nightclothes, was on her way to Mary’s room to retrieve her book. She had no idea what her mother wanted from her that she could have not told her before.

Elizabeth frowned. “Mama?”

“Come here.” Her mother mouthed, making a wide, inviting gesture with her hand.

Elizabeth pulled her shawl tighter over her arms and stepped across the hall. “Yes, Mama.”

Mrs. Bennet shoved her inside the room and closed the door, “I did not want to talk about it in the presence of Jane. Poor, poor Janie.”

Elizabeth’s heart fluttered in worry. “What has happened?”

Mrs. Bennet settled in her favourite armchair in front of the fireplace. “I paid a visit to my sister Phillips today while you were walking with Mr. Darcy.”

“Yes, I know. You  have told us about it already, Mama, at dinner.”

“What I did not tell you is what I heard there about Mr. Darcy.”

Elizabeth stared down at her mother with a frown. “Mr. Darcy? What would that have to do with Jane?”

“Mr. Darcy is not staying at Netherfield.” Mrs. Bennet announced.

“He is not? Then where?” Elizabeth’s eyebrows shot up. “Are you sure, Mama?”

“Yes, Lizzy. It is certain.”

Elizabeth’s frown deepened. “But...” She sat down on the opposite chair.

“Has he ever mentioned to you that he was staying at Netherfield?” Mrs. Bennet asked.

Elizabeth hesitated. “No, he has not, although I took it for granted. It seemed logical - Mr. Bingley is his friend - so I thought that Mr. Darcy asked his permission to use his house during his visit in the neighbourhood.”

“Nothing like that has happened, it seems. Mr. Darcy has been staying at the inn in Meryton since he arrived.”

Elizabeth stared at her mother. “I had no idea.”

“There is more, child. He is buying Purvis Lodge.”

Elizabeth blinked her eyes. “Who?”

“Mr. Darcy, of course,” the older woman cried impatiently.

“Mr. Darcy, Purvis Lodge?” Elizabeth questioned unbelievingly. Purvis Lodge was a spacious cottage with a large garden, stables and  even a small park, just outside Meryton. It had been uninhabited for the last couple of years.

“Are you sure, Mama?”

“Yes, Mr. Darcy came to your uncle yesterday to ask him if he would care to deal with all the legal papers concerning the sale.”

“I know nothing about it,” Elizabeth said. “Mr. Darcy never mentioned it to me.”

Mrs. Bennet  leaned forward.  “Lizzy, child, you must ask Mr. Darcy about it. If he is buying Purvis Lodge, it can only mean that Mr. Bingley does not intend to ever come back to Netherfield, and Mr. Darcy, as his friend, knows that. Perhaps Mr. Bingley already decided to give up the lease of Netherfield. You must talk with Mr. Darcy about it and question him whether his friend intends to ever return here. You must do it as soon as possible, tomorrow.”

Elizabeth gave her a worried look. “But Mama... Mr. Darcy told me today that he will be away for the next two days. Tomorrow morning he goes to London to see to some important business there.”

Mrs. Bennet clasped her hands together. “He needs to bring money to pay for Purvis Lodge,” she exclaimed. “It is the only explanation.”

“I think you are correct on this, Mama.”

Mrs. Bennet was shaking her head. “Lizzy, I do not like it. I do not like it at all. What if Mr. Darcy had an argument with Mr. Bingley! Perhaps they are not friends any more? Mr. Bingley will never come here to be the groomsman at your wedding, and he and Jane will never have another chance. Oh, my poor nerves!”

“Mama, we cannot know that.”

“Did Mr. Darcy speak to you about Mr. Bingley?”

“No, he did not.”

“You see yourself! Poor, poor Jane. I have thought that all will be well now, but no, all is lost.”

“No, Mama, it is not,” Elizabeth spoke with force. “I will ask Mr. Darcy about his friend at the first opportunity. I promise you. I am sure it is just a misunderstanding of sorts.”

“I hope so, Lizzy.  I do hope so,” Mrs. Bennet said in a weak voice.

Elizabeth leaned to kiss her cheek and quietly left the room.

***

From midday, on the day when Mr. Darcy was to come back from London, Elizabeth impatiently awaited his visit.   She sat near the window in order to see who was coming, calmly bearing the teasing of her younger sisters, who joked that she awaited her admirer. The sale of Purvis Lodge seemed to be a fact. Elizabeth had walked by the place earlier in the morning  and had seen that the doors and windows had been opened wide, with servants working, putting the house into order.

The more she thought about the matter, the more she was convinced that Mr. Darcy had not told Mr. Bingley about their courtship, about his intentions toward her. Her suspicion was that Mr. Darcy still considered Jane not good enough for his friend and tried to keep Mr. Bingley away, not informing him of his stay in Hertfordshire. Such reasoning on Mr. Darcy’s part did not make much sense to Elizabeth. After all, he had decided to marry her, and since she was Jane’s sister, they belonged to the same family. If she was good enough for Mr. Darcy of Pemberley, her sister should be considered an appropriate match for his friend. For certain, not all of Mr. Darcy’s actions could have been easily explained.

The sun began lowering on the skyline, but Mr. Darcy had not arrived. Elizabeth began to wonder what could have kept him away, because she was sure he would pay her a visit the same day he returned to the neighbourhood.

Closer to dinner time, a man came, whom Elizabeth recognised as one of Mr. Darcy’s servants, bringing a small parcel for her.

She ran upstairs to her room and tore the wrapping with impatient hands. There was a book inside and a note, with Elizabeth written in a strong hand.

She sat close to the window, opened the seal and began to read.

My dearest, loveliest Elizabeth,

I dearly hope you are in good health, the same as when I last saw you. When we spoke, I said that I would return to you in two days' time, but some unexpected circumstances have detained me in London. My sister, Georgiana, insists on meeting you, and wants to travel with me to Hertfordshire. I know for certain that the Militia is to leave by the end of the week, so we will probably arrive on Monday afternoon, as there will be no risk of her meeting W.

I think about you every day, my love. I passed by a bookshop today and noticed this book, thinking you would like to read those poems. I saw you reading Wordsworth in the past, and this is the newest selection of his poetry. I hope you will enjoy it.

Yours,

F. Darcy.

There was a knock on the door and Mrs. Bennet came in.

“Lizzy?”

Elizabeth turned to her. “Yes, Mama.”

The woman walked closer. “What does he write?”

“He is coming back on Monday.”

“What has he sent you?”

“A book of poems.”

“Does he write anything about Mr. Bingley, about Purvis Lodge?” Mrs. Bennet asked in a whisper.

Elizabeth folded the note. “No, Mama, he does not. ”

“He does not,” Mrs. Bennet sighed fretfully.

“No, but he says that he will bring his sister with him so I can meet her.”

“His sister, that is good.  The girls will have   new company,” she said listlessly. “Come, Lizzy. We have fish for dinner, the way you like it.”

***

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