CHAPTER FIVE:
No Pony?
-o0o-
Thursday, June 7
th
IT HAD BEEN LESS
than a week since I talked to Brick about a car, but when I walked into the compound and saw Brick waving me over I hoped that he'd found one. I almost skipped towards him.
“
Ready to see you ride?” he asked and put his arm around my shoulders.
I knew I had a big stupid smile on my face when we walked into the garage and it stayed there up until the point he proudly waved towards a big, blue truck. A fucking truck! I kept staring at it. Was this a joke? I couldn't drive around in that monster! I was trying to think about something to say that didn't make me sound extremely... rude or ungrateful.
“How much am I supposed to pay for it?”
That was the only thing I could think of saying. Which I realized sounded both rude
and
ungrateful. I heard a familiar laugh when Dawg walked around from behind it, wiping his hands on a rag.
“
It's a classic, Nibbles. And you'll be safe when you practice driving this thing. You'll tear through other cars like tissue paper.”
I stared at Brick and he nodded in confirmation.
“I'll kill people,” I tried.
I'd been driving in New Delhi for chrissakes. There, bumping into cars was how you got people's attention!
“Don't give a shit about 'people', doll. Give a shit about you and my kids and you'll all be safe in this thing. And you're not paying for it.”
It looked like a heap of shit, and I sighed. Between the emails from Lanie and actually getting to know him, I knew for sure that he was a determined guy, and that was the diplomatic way of putting it. In plain English, he was a stubborn motherfucker used to getting what he wanted. He wouldn't get me another car, no matter what I said. Wasn't giving up on the paying for it, though, even if I had a hunch that he'd simply refuse to take my money. I sighed again.
“Does it even run?”
“
Dawg has made sure of that and we'll keep it running for you. Just make sure you hand it in now and then.”
“
I'll even install a stereo for you,” Dawg said and smiled.
I would've actually expected a wink or wiggling eyebrows to that comment, but he looked... normal. Wasn't flirting at all, and I wondered what that was about. But he looked nice and honest so I smiled back.
“Thanks, but...” I turned back to Brick. “I'm paying for it.”
“
No you're not.” He kissed my cheek and turned to walk away. “Have fun kids.”
“
Ready to practice?” Dawg said with another big smile. Which was a bit more like his usual smiles.
“
With him?!” I yelled after Brick while pointing at Dawg.
Brick didn't even turn around, but I could swear I saw his shoulder shaking as if he was laughing. That fucker!
“I'm not gonna bite, and yes, with me.”
I glared at him. “What are you up to?”
“Babe, absolutely nothin'.”
“
How did you convince him to do this?”
“
It wasn't that hard. Told him I'd behave and that I'd inform you that if I was out of line all you had to do was tell him and he'd take me up in the ring.”
The ring was their boxing ring where they now and then beat each other up. I did notice that Dawg looked a bit surprised, and I couldn't help myself.
“Admit it, you're surprised, too, because you know what you're like. And I'm not gonna be able to focus if I need to fend of your... advances.”
“
Advances?” He laughed. “Nibbles, I'm flat out hitting on you or I'm not, I don't advance.”
“
And now you're not?”
“
I'm not. You’d know if I was.” He opened the door on the driver's side. “Get in.”
-o0o-
“Jesus fucking christ, Nibbles. You weren't kidding when you said you were a bad driver!” Dawg yelled and grabbed the wheel with his right hand while at the same time trying to remove her hands from it with his left. “Brake!”
When they were safe at the side of the road, he was hyperventilating and turned when he heard Edie mumble next to him.
“Can we go out to some big area? I'm not used to this car.”
Dawg took a few deep, calming breaths. “You're not used to
any
car, lady. You're not used to
driving.
Period!
”
He noticed her big eyes becoming shiny, and he was about to curse out loud, because Dawg was not good with crying women. At all! And it certainly looked like Edie was about to cry. Then her lips parted in a smile and she started to laugh. It totally blindsided him.
“What?” He asked, not yet fully laughing.
“
Lady? You called me ‘lady’?”
“
That's what you got from that? I've called you loads of shit.”
“
I know.” She took a few deep breaths and dried her cheeks while still giggling. “Just... 'lady'? I'm a lot of things, but no lady. And you made me feel like I’m sixty years old.”
“
What?” He couldn't stop laughing now. “Sixty years old?”
“
Yeah. 'Lady' is like one step from 'ma'am'. Makes me think of blue hair and menthols.”
That's when Dawg lost it. He couldn't fucking stop laughing. It was the combination of Edie laughing, that he just a few minutes earlier literary saw his life flash before his eyes, and the panic he'd felt for quite some time before that. And then Edie, just laughing. She was very beautiful when she laughed, and she didn't do it in a feminine way. The woman was half screaming when she laughed. She even snorted, and her reaction to that was to slam her hand over her mouth and laugh even harder.
So he leaned against the dashboard, laughing his ass off.
“
Oh, come on!” Edie hit him in the side, but he still couldn't' stop.
He could hear the door on the drivers side opening and a few seconds later the one on his side. She was pushing his side, trying to get him to move over.
“Slide over and drive somewhere safe.”
“
Safe?” He asked and dried his eyes, sliding over to the driver’s seat.
“
Yeah. Where it's safe for me to drive.”
That made him laugh again. “You want me to drive to the Sahara?”
“Shut up!” She hit him again. “It's a big car.”
“
Baby, it's a truck.” He turned the ignition while looking at her. She was still smiling. He really liked her smiling. “It's designed to be big.”
“
Why couldn't he just give me something small? Like a Beetle or something else that's cute.”
“
He wants you safe. It's safer to drive around in a cardboard box than in a Beetle. And
lady,
you
need
a safe car.”
“
Where are you taking me?”
“
It's a quarry. Loads of room for you to get comfortable with the truck.”
She was quiet for a while and then turned to him. “Thanks, Dawg, this is really nice of you.”
“No problem, Nibbles.”
“
Why did you really want to do this?”
“
I'm the patient one.”
She sat still and then started to laugh. “Wow! Considering how you went off back there, anyone else would probably have killed me if you're the patient one.”
He considered it for a while and then made up his mind. “Actually, I asked for it because I think we got off on the wrong foot.”
“
With you violently hitting on me?”
“
Exactly. I'll behave and maybe the others'll stop glaring at me and Vasco might talk to me normally again.”
“
And you won't get blowjobs in my room?”
“
No. I'll behave.”
“
Good. Not saying you can't have blowjobs, just not in my room.”
“
I got that, Nibbles. And I'm getting blowjobs whether you like it or not.”
“
Why do you call me that?”
“
I'll tell you if...”
She wouldn't let him finish. “If I tell you what I have on my back. You said you weren't going to flirt with me.”
“I said I wasn't going to hit on you, but that's not what I'm doing.”
“
It's not?”
He turned and smiled at her. “You might've noticed, I'm pretty fucking interested in ink, and what people have on them means something. At least if you only have one.”
“What makes you think I only have one?” She did an annoyed face when he raised an eyebrow at her. “Okay, I only have one. Still not gonna tell you and if I do, I'd rather get your first name.”
She turned her head back towards the road without saying anything else.
“You're not gonna tell me?”
“
No.”
There was a twitch on her lips and he turned his eyes back to the road as well. Sooner or later he'd find out. Hopefully before she killed him while driving her truck.
-o0o-
Tuesday, June 22
nd
DAWG HAD STARTED TO
text me. It started with texts from him just telling me when we were going to practice driving. Pretty soon he texted random stuff, and I quickly figured out he had the humor of a twelve year old boy, but my sense of humor wasn't all that mature, so I liked it.
“
i'm outside your window”,
was sent to me one night.
I was reading in bed and wondered what the hell he was up to and got up to look outside. I didn't see anyone.
“No, you're not.” I texted back. It took about five minutes and then he got back to me.
“
my invisibility cloak is working!”
I started laughing out loud and felt a bit silly about falling for something so stupid and obvious and decided to get back at him.
“You should use capitalization and punctuation. It's pretty important.”
“
Text. Messenger. Nazi!”
Was all I got back.
“
It's the difference between 'Helping your Uncle Jack off a horse' and 'helping your uncle jack off a horse'.”
“
I'll get you for horses nibbles. Go to bed! Driving tomorrow!”
“
Are you gonna give me a pony?”
“
shut up and go to bed.”
“
No pony?”
“
Hello?”
I didn't hear from him again that night, and he didn't mention horses until three days later, when I came to the compound for practice and he had painted a white My Little Pony on the side of my truck. I wasn't sure how to get back at him for that, but I was gonna get him.
-o0o-
Thursday, June 25
th
VASCO NOTICED THAT IT
was Edie driving into the lot this time and Dawg was sitting next to her. Obviously she was getting more comfortable with driving the truck. After the first catastrophe, Dawg hadn't let her drive within two miles of populated areas.
Vasco'd told Brick that she wouldn't like that big thing, but Brick wanted her and anyone she drove in it, mainly Eliza, safe. And she did seem to like it now, despite that big fucking pony Dawg had painted on the side of it.
He'd seen Dawg sitting and talking to Vi, Bear’s youngest daughter, and later the same day the two of them standing on the side of the truck painting something. When he came up to them, Vi looked nervous, so Dawg made him swear he wouldn't tell Edie that Vi had been in on it. She was apparently a bit nervous about it, but Dawg had persuaded her, since he wanted the horse to look good and Vi was good at drawing.
The Dawg and Edie thing had turned out better than expected. Dawg was making an effort to get to know her, and as far as Vasco could tell that was working out really well. She liked it, too and they got along, seemed to have fun together, but he wasn't sure... if it was more than just the two of them being friendly. He hadn't completely figured those two out, and it bugged him. He had a feeling they wouldn't be able to be just friends.
Edie came up to him and sat down next to him, looking pretty pleased.
“
He let me drive in town today, on the main roads. Where other people drive!”