Audrey and the Maverick (16 page)

Audrey gave her a warning look. “That doesn’t mean I would sell my body, Maddie. I’ve been at his ranch a month and we haven’t—we didn’t—I’m still as I was.”

Maddie held up a hand. “Just hear me out, child. Let’s say you marry this stranger and make a life with him. Perhaps he’s a thoughtful spouse. Perhaps he thinks of making you happy, but perhaps not. Perhaps he uses you, consumes you, taking and never giving. Perhaps you lie in your marriage bed, growing bitter and sad, night after night, year after year.”

Audrey sat next to Maddie on the sofa, regarding her friend in a new light. Maddie had always been her neighbor, the kind, middle-aged lady who lived alone. Now she wondered at Maddie’s life, wondered what brought her to open a boardinghouse by herself in a town like Defiance. “Did that happen to you?”

“I’ve been married to three men, honey. The first and last died; the middle I divorced.” She pressed her lips into a thin line as she regarded Audrey. “Contrary to what you read, contrary to what Sally Kessler would tell you, there’s nothing sacred about what happens between a man and a woman. It is just a physical act, like eating or smiling.

“It can be nice; it can be boring. It can be awful. Or it can be extraordinary. Wouldn’t it be wonderful if you could taste extraordinary? If you could know, before you settle for your stranger, as we both know you’ll do, what the best of a man felt like?”

“Are you suggesting I accept McCaid’s offer?”

“Why not? You certainly would benefit from it. And we know you’re a practical girl. Honey, let me tell you, if a man like that offered me a summer of passion, well, I think I’d pay him for the pleasure.”

“Maddie!” Audrey was shocked. Maddie had been friendly with her parents and with Leah’s mother; it was strange to think of her hungering for a man. “It doesn’t matter anymore. He made that offer before he knew about the children. I doubt he will feel the same way now.”

“I saw the look he gave you at Jim’s. He’s going to feel the same way. More so, now that he knows your secret. And he went after your kids. He didn’t have to do that. He wouldn’t have done that if he wasn’t a man worth having. He would have let Sager and Malcolm go alone.”

Audrey slumped against the sofa back, considering the shocking advice her very staid neighbor had just given her. “What’s the advice you would give Leah?”

“Leah is more fragile than you. She’s never trusted any man. She would not survive a casual relationship. Nor would she pick just any man for a husband.”

Audrey considered that, compared it to her own situation. She wasn’t sure she was as strong as Maddie thought. If she gave herself to Julian, his leaving would destroy her.

Audrey leaned wearily against the window jamb, trying to reassure herself that the kids were fine. They had to be. Julian and Sager were capable men. But she’d made the kids afraid of Julian, and they didn’t know Sager. At least Malcolm would be there to put them at ease. They would find the kids and bring them home safely, she reassured herself, until her mind began to cycle through its crushing destructive thinking. What if the children had not stayed together? What if they encountered a mountain lion? What if they got hopelessly lost and the men couldn’t find them?

What if the sheriff had sent men after them?

Audrey pushed away from the wall and started another loop around the room. Maddie was dozing on the sofa, snoring genteelly. A sound outside drew Audrey to the window.

“Maddie! They’re back!” Audrey ran through the front door and down the steps. Five horses were stopped between her home and Maddie’s, two with bodies strapped to them. Hysteria clawed at her, melting rational thought. Oh, dear God. What had happened?

Sager and Malcolm dismounted and began lifting children down. Mabel, Colleen, and Joey ran to her. She gave them fierce hugs, bending close to look into their faces. They looked tired and happy and relieved. Not hurt. Then Kurt stood there, looking at her. Something was wrong. Luc came and stood there too. Sager lifted Tommy down, his sleeping form slack against his shoulder.

Maddie hurried into the street, holding a lantern high. Julian dismounted, holding Dulcie in his arms. Something about the way he held her made fear catch in Audrey’s chest. What had happened out there?

Julian handed her to Audrey. “She was scared. She leaked.”

“Julian, what happened?”

“Here, I’ll take her.” Maddie set her lantern down in the drive, away from the horses. “Malcolm, help me get them settled.” Maddie took Dulcie, and Malcolm took Tommy. They ushered the others ahead of them, leaving the older boys with Julian, Sager, and Audrey.

Audrey didn’t like the silence surrounding the boys. They were never still, never quiet, especially not on a night like this. Audrey opened her arms and the boys stepped into her embrace. She wrapped her arms around their shoulders, pressing kisses against their foreheads. “Tell me what happened.” There were two dead men. Something had happened.

Kurt spoke first. “We were coming out to find you.”

“Why?”

“I heard what the sheriff’s planning. It ain’t good.” Luc looked from Audrey to McCaid. “He’s sending men out to slaughter your sheep and burn your buildings. We had to warn you. And he ordered some men to come for Kurt and me.”

“We had to leave, and we had to bring the others in case the sheriff’s men went after them too,” Kurt added, looking at Audrey. “We didn’t know what else to do.”

Audrey waited for the rest of the story, the part where someone explained the dead men. She looked at Julian and Sager. The hard expressions on their faces did little to settle her nerves.

“We were about to camp for the night, when they found us.” Luc pointed to the bodies tied to their horses.

“They chased us with knives. We made the others run or hide or just get away. But those two, they tied us up and took a strop to us, trying to get the others to come out of hiding.”

Audrey shut her eyes, but was unable to block the images storming her mind. “How bad is it?”

Luc shrugged. “I got worse from my old man.” He rubbed his wrists. “I just didn’t like being tied up.”

“Go inside, boys,” she quietly ordered. “I’ll put some salve on your injuries.”

Audrey looked from Julian to Sager and back again. “I can’t thank you two enough. If you hadn’t ridden after them, hadn’t found them—” Audrey’s eyes blurred as moisture filled them. She looked at the dead men. “Who were they?”

“Howie and Zeke,” Julian answered.

Audrey wrapped her arms around her waist, feeling hollow. This was her fault. She should have let Howie do what he wanted to. Warm arms surrounded her, pulling her against a hard chest as her sobs took hold. She was vaguely aware of Sager leading three of the horses toward Maddie’s stable.

“Ah, sweetheart. It will be all right. The boys will heal in no time. Tonight was more than they bargained for, it’s true. This is a tough place to raise children. I wish—I wish I had known about them. I wish you had trusted me.”

“I wish I had known I could trust you.” She resisted the urge to cry herself out in his arms. She couldn’t break down now. She had to see to the kids. Her gaze snagged on Julian’s torn sleeve and all the blood staining the material. “You’re hurt.” Audrey pulled free to look at his wound.

He reluctantly let her out of his arms. “Just a scratch. Sager took care of it. I’m going to deal with those two.” He nodded toward the bodies. “I’ll see you in the morning—we need to talk.”

Julian took up the reins from the outlaws’ horses and followed Sager to Maddie’s stable as a new and troubling thought came to him. Was Amy Lynn Audrey’s daughter or another of her foster children? He sincerely hoped it was the latter, for then her first introduction to intimacy with a man might not have been violent—if indeed she’d ever been with a man.
“I didn’t know him,”
she’d told him in response to his question about whether she loved Amy’s father. Had that meant Amy wasn’t her own child?

“Mr. McCaid?”

Julian looked up, surprised to see Luc still up. He had washed his hands and face and now wore fresh clothes. “It’s late, Luc. You should be in bed.”

“Yessir. I just had something to ask you.”

“What’s that?”

“Will you take care of Audrey? Me and Kurt, well, we can’t…” He nodded toward their small shack. “And Malcolm isn’t…”

Julian straightened and looked at the boy. What was it about Audrey that engendered such protective behavior from the males around her—all except her brother, apparently? Julian looked at Sager, then back at Luc, who still awaited his answer.

“Yes, I will, son.”
Whether or not she’ll let me.

Luc nodded. “Good night, then.”

Julian stared into the darkness outside the small stable long after the boy left. How the hell was he going to protect Audrey? She was the most independent, mule-headed woman he’d ever encountered. He’d already offered his protection and been turned down—several times. He sent Sager a look; his friend only grinned. Julian swallowed an oath and went back to the work at hand, rubbing the horses down and setting out oats and water.

“You could marry her,” Sager offered helpfully.

“No, I can’t.”

“Why not?”

“You know why not.”

“Change your plans.”

Julian did curse then. “Leave it alone, Sager.”

“And let my friend make the worst mistake of his life? Hell, Julian, you’re a maverick. You created your world, you don’t have to be a victim of it. You have an empire and enough money to run a small country. Who do you think is going to come after you and threaten that?”

“The world is what it is, Sager. It’s bad enough being part Cherokee. If any of my business partners found out that I’ve got black blood, they would no longer do business with me. My empire, as you call it, would collapse.”

“Then build it again. Find business associates who aren’t bigots.”

“And what if slavery is reinstated? What if a few years from now the government decides it shouldn’t have been abolished?”

Sager straightened and gave him a hard look over the side of the stall. “It ain’t coming back, Julian. It’s done.”

Julian sighed. Sager had spent most of his life thinking he was part white, part Shoshone. He, of all people, should understand what Julian had to deal with. That he didn’t was frustrating. Perhaps the difference was in their self-perceptions. In the war, Sager’s experience in the West made him an excellent scout. Indian blood or no, he was admitted into the ranks of the white troops. Had anyone known Julian’s grandmother was a slave, Julian would only have been allowed to serve in the ranks of the Negro soldiers. His situation was complicated. He was white enough to be white. He didn’t need to try to pass for white—he was white.

But he was also black.

Sager came out of a stall and tossed the rag he’d been using into a bucket. “I’m gonna say this, my friend, and then I will never again discuss this with you. If you love Audrey and you leave her to go make your life with another woman, your thoughts will plague you. You’ll lie awake at night, wondering where she is, if she’s safe, if she’s healthy, who she’s with. You’ll hear she’s happy and it will gut you to know she’s happy while you’re miserable. You’ll hear she’s suffering, and you’ll know there’s nothing you can do for her. All because you made a decision, based on dumb-ass reasoning, that once made can’t be changed.”

“My happiness is immaterial, Sager. I have to put the welfare of my children before anything else.”

Sager walked out of the stables, toward the horses patiently holding the dead men. “For a smart man, Julian, you’re dumb as hell.”

Julian followed him. “I don’t love her.”

“I fought loving Rachel. I fought it kicking and screaming, but the truth was I loved her on first sight when I saw her standing there facing that rabid wolf. You’re outflanked, Julian. Sometimes, you just have to surrender.”

They led the outlaws’ horses around the corner and up the street to the sheriff’s. It was well into the wee hours of the morning now. Even Sam’s had closed. The town had an eerie quiet about it, lying dormant in the blue-gray haze cast by the moonlight. Outside the sheriff’s, they untied the first body and set it down on the boardwalk, leaning it against the jailhouse. They put the second body next to it. Rigor mortis had set in, locking the two corpses into the position they had been in draped over their horses, their arms outstretched, their bodies leaning forward slightly.

Sager tilted his head, looking at them critically. “That don’t look right.” He tried to reposition them, but they were too stiff.

“Leave them. Go back to Maddie’s. I don’t want you here for this.”

“Bullshit. I’m coming with you.”

“You’ve got a family now, Sager. You don’t need this trouble.”

“I got you for a friend. That’s nothing but trouble. Let’s get this done with.”

Julian went inside the jail. The door creaked. He halted, waiting for one of the sheriff’s henchmen to appear. No one did. The sheriff and his boys usually drank pretty freely at Sam’s each night. They were probably out cold. Julian moved through the dark interior to the hallway that led to the stairs up to the sheriff’s apartment. Sager stayed below, making sure no one else followed him.

The stairs opened immediately into the sheriff’s large, one-room apartment. The place was a pigsty and smelled much worse. Clothes and liquor bottles littered the floor. Dishes were stacked on the table and dry sink. A couple of men slept on the carpet next to the sofa. One man slept on the sofa, his snores joining with those coming from someone on the bed. Julian made his way to the man stretched across the rumpled bed. He was still fully clothed, still wearing his boots. Julian eased the silver star off his vest and tossed it in an overflowing spittoon, wondering how long it would take Kemp to discover it. Then he knelt on the bed and took a fistful of Kemp’s hair and pressed his knife to his throat. He grinned down into the sheriff’s face, waiting for him to focus, knowing his smile wasn’t a nice one.

As soon as Kemp did awaken, he jerked forward, trying to sit up, nicking himself against Julian’s knife. “Bet that hurt.” Julian winced and sucked a sharp breath between his teeth. “This knife is too damned sharp.”

“What the hell do you want?” the sheriff growled.

“I came to tell you I left a surprise for you downstairs. And I wanted to personally assure you that if you ever send your boys after Audrey or her kids again, or you try to harm her yourself, I will kill your boys and then I will kill you. If you doubt me, just ask Howie and Zeke.” He moved back, letting the sheriff up just enough to land a solid right hook against his jaw, laying him out flat.

The drunk on the sofa and the men on the floor never roused.

Julian made his way downstairs. Sager silently followed him to the door. Outside, they took up the reins to the outlaws’ horses. “What are you going to do with the horses?” Sager asked.

“Kemp can’t claim them without claiming the boys who rode them.” Julian grinned at Sager. “You should take one. I’ll give the other to Audrey.”

“Done.”

Audrey did not sleep well that night. She was too exhausted to relax and could only doze between bouts of wakefulness. She was back in her bed, with Amy beside her. The kids were all safely in their bunks, Malcolm included. Everything was back to normal.

And everything was completely different.

She knew a decision awaited her in the morning; she just didn’t know what it would be. Should she try to make a go of it in Cheyenne? That option was fraught with unknowns. Could she do it if Leah didn’t come too? Would Malcolm go or stay here? And what of Julian’s last offer? Was it still on the table? Would he rescind it tomorrow when they spoke, now that he knew about the kids?

Her thoughts were worse when she did doze off. Maddie’s crazy suggestion took root as her mind played with that option. She relived her encounters with Julian. She felt his mouth on hers, his arms banded about her, holding her naked body against his, skin to skin. She felt her fingers sift through his silky brown hair. His scent filled her nostrils, permeated her soul. In one dream, he set her on a table as he had done when he came here. He spread her thighs. He touched her.

There.

The shock of it woke her up. Dawn lightened the sky. Audrey was glad the last twenty-four hours were done. This was a new day, a new chance. She rose, sponge-bathed, then dressed and set water boiling. She intended to make sure every one of her children had a bath today. Then she would trim their hair, scrub the little cabin, and do laundry. Days like this were best spent lost in work. What was coming was coming, like a wall of water down the mountainside, straight toward her.

She wondered where she would be when the washout came to a stop.

Leah saw her open front door and came over bearing eggs and day-old bread perfect for battered toast. “What happened?” she asked. “I heard the kids last night. Is everything all right? Are they okay? Are you?”