Autumn Bridge (45 page)

“He stayed by your side for three weeks, to insure that you were well recovered from your recent loss. Only official duties would take him away.”

“I felt less care than observation in his presence. He seemed to be watching me rather closely.”

“A righteous man sometimes joins a too-brittle sense of propriety to an overactive imagination.”

“I fail to see anything in my behavior that would warrant such exertion. And I am not sure I would call Robert righteous. Being quick to pass judgment does not make one righteous.”

“If he has been hasty, then I am sure it is only because of his concern for your well-being.” Smith smiled. “I find it highly ironical that I am justifying Lieutenant Farrington’s actions to you on his behalf.”

“So do I. Especially since you were ready to assault him only two days ago.”

“A terrible lapse, for which I once again apologize.”

“It was more than a lapse, Charles. That afternoon, something passed quite wordlessly between Robert and yourself. The result was violent outrage on your part, and acute embarrassment on his. What was the cause?”

Smith chose his words with care. He said, “His thoughts, and my sudden apprehension of them.”

“I had gathered as much on my own.”

“To go further would exceed the bounds of proper conversation between a lady and a gentleman.”

Emily frowned. “You and Robert have shared a thought, presumably about me, a thought sufficiently volatile to cause you to attack him. Yet you cannot properly enunciate it in my presence? You will excuse me if I am not comforted.”

Smith bowed, conceding the point. “Nevertheless, there we must leave it.”

“That is most unsatisfying to both my curiosity and my feelings.”

“Once you are betrothed, Emily, it will not matter anyway, so it should not matter now.”

“Once I am betrothed. I am sorry to have delayed matters so long. I assure you, it has nothing to do with either Robert or yourself, and entirely with my own flaws.”

Smith said, “I would not call being in love a flaw.”

Crimson instantly suffused Emily’s cheeks. He knew by this that his surmise had been correct. Her inherent honesty betrayed her even when she did not speak. She did her best to cover the truth, but he had already seen it.

She said, “It would be simple indeed were I in love with you or Robert. But while my admiration is great and equal, that is not yet the case. That is what makes the decision so difficult.”

“There is difficulty,” Smith said. “But not in the decision. It is already made. You are in love.” Now that he knew, his sympathies were aroused. The road ahead of her was fraught with peril of a kind and degree she could not even imagine. Taro’s attempt on her life — for Smith saw now that Farrington had been right about that, if nothing else — was certain to be only the first of many. “You must follow your heart. What else is there to do? The only question is, are his feelings consonant with yours? If they are not, love can only bring suffering, not joy. In that case, you would be well advised to choose admiration over love.”

“I think perhaps we are not speaking of the same thing,” Emily said.

“You are in love with Lord Genji,” Smith said.

Had she not been sitting, she would surely have fallen.

“God help me,” she said. “Is it so obvious?”

“No,” Smith said. “I wasn’t certain until now. So far as I know, I am the only one who even suspects.”

“Robert doesn’t?”

“His suspicions are of a different nature.”

He was grateful that she did not pursue that line of thought. Instead, she bowed her head and buried her face in her hands.

She said, “What am I to do?”

“Be patient,” he said. “When Lieutenant Farrington and I have gone, it is not unlikely that Lord Genji will deduce the truth. Then he will come forward, or he will not, and you will have your answer.”

When she looked up, her eyes were wet, but she smiled and said, “Thank you, Charles. You are a very good and kind friend.”

Smith bowed. “Should your best hopes not be realized, I stand ready to be good and kind and more than a friend. Business will keep me in Edo for another month. I will visit you again before I leave Japan.”

“I have not deserved such consideration.”

“Nevertheless, you have it.” Smith smiled. “But be cautious. Your relationship with Lord Genji has already been the cause of malicious gossip within the Western community. Things highly damaging to your reputation have been said.”

“It is written,
We can do nothing against the truth, but for the truth.
I will trust in that.”

“Amen,” Smith said, “but remember, it is also written,
The poison of asps is under their lips, and the sting of the asp is deadly
.”

“Amen,” Emily said. “I have done nothing wrong. Nor has Lord Genji.”

“I have never thought it of either of you,” Smith said. He did not add, Unlike Lieutenant Farrington.

“First Lieutenant Farrington,” Genji said, “and now you, Mr. Smith. How regrettable. I had hoped for a resolution. Nothing is amiss, I hope. Lieutenant Farrington seemed more morose than usual.”

“He has let himself get caught up in wrong thinking,” Smith said. “He will come out of it eventually.”

“Wrong thinking?”

“It means faulty reasoning leading to the wrong conclusions.”

“I understand the idiom,” Genji said. “I don’t understand the reference.”

“Is that possible? Miss Gibson, an exceptionally beautiful young woman of marriageable age, has been your houseguest without chaperone, relative, or companion for several years. It is not difficult to reach the wrong conclusion about your relationship.”

Genji said, “Emily has not been without watchful companions the entire time she has been my guest. She has also spent much of that time on expeditions of her own. In this castle and the palace in Edo, she has quarters entirely separate — and, may I add, distant — from mine. Days and weeks have passed without either of us even seeing the other in passing. I understood lords in other countries have accommodated guests on a similar basis.”

“Her companions have not been from among her own people,” Smith said. “They have been your vassals and servants. Anyone who has been in this country for a single hour knows that the command of a lord is obeyed without question. They are no real protection for her. And guests who visit lords in such places as England always have servants and chaperones of their own.”

Genji nodded. “How foolish of me. I should have relied on an advisor other than Emily. Her innocence sometimes prevents her from seeing things as others might. May I assume Lieutenant Farrington believes I have somehow taken advantage of her?”

“In a word, yes.”

“And you?”

Smith smiled.

“Lieutenant Farrington has a habit of suppressing his instinctive feelings and natural thoughts as if they were traitorous rebels. He refuses to acknowledge them as his own, and instead imputes them to others. I do not suffer from that habit. Besides, my lord, if you want something, you would take it openly, the consequences be damned. That is the way of the samurai, is it not?”

“That is the way as we like to think it is, and how we would like others to see it,” Genji said. “In fact, we are so concerned with consequences and appearances, we frequently are capable of nothing at all. We rely so much on what is not said, we frequently do not stop to consider that nothing at all has been communicated, that there is only the wish in our own heads. We are often the opposite of decisive, I am sorry to say.”

“Then let me relieve you of some of the burden by speaking plainly,” Smith said, “and being as decisive as I can. I will return at the end of next month before departing for home. If Emily remains unbetrothed, I will renew my suit. I hope she is, yet I know her hope is the opposite, so I pray most sincerely that she finds happiness, wherever it is best found.”

“‘Her hope is the opposite.’ Do you mean she has a preference for Lieutenant Farrington?”

“Her preference is not for Lieutenant Farrington. And her feelings are quite beyond preference altogether. She is in love, and has been, I believe, for some time. Furthermore, I believe you have known it all along.”

Smith wondered how Genji would react. Outrage? Surprise? Contempt? Laughter? Perhaps he had gone too far.

Genji’s expression did not change. The small smile that was habitually on his lips remained, and he spoke in his usual tone.

“I have often wondered whether she is as transparent to her own people as she is to us,” he said. “Apparently, she has not been, or neither you nor Lieutenant Farrington would have gone as far as you have. Sometimes, those on the outside can see what those on the inside cannot. May I ask what has led you to your new awareness?”

“Pure accident, sir.” Smith was relieved by Genji’s mild response. “A confluence of observation, remarks, oddities of behavior. All came together of a sudden, and I was able to make sense of it. You must remember, there has always been much talk amongst her own people, none of it flattering. Speculation has tended to be of an extremely salacious nature.”

“But she is so prim and proper.”

“She is also extremely beautiful.”

“So I understand.”

“You understand. You do not see it for yourself?”

“Frankly, no. Our ideals of beauty are so different, it is almost as if beauty and ugliness are reversed for us.”

Now it was Smith who was surprised.

“You find Emily ugly?”

“Well, ugly is a harsh word. Unattractive would be the better choice.”

Smith exhaled as if he had been holding his breath.

He said, “That is a great relief to me, sir. If you returned her love, then the situation would be dangerous to you both, in every way imaginable. Neither of our nations looks with favor on the mixing of races. Furthermore, you are in need of an heir, and it is certain Emily would never accept being a concubine. To her, that would only be a form of harlotry.”

“You spoke of renewing your offer of marriage to her.”

“As I said, I will, as soon as I return.”

“Why wait? Do it now.”

“A woman in love with one man needs time to open her heart to another. We must proceed with patience. For now, tell her we have spoken — of my suit, not of your knowledge of her feelings — and say that you approve wholeheartedly. Your enthusiasm will speak volumes. And she will then have a month to prepare for my return.”

“Thank you, Mr. Smith, for your wise counsel.”

Genji remained alone after Smith left. He could speak to Emily in the way Smith had advised. It would require a certain amount of lying, which was not a problem, since he was a much better liar than she was. He had concealed his feelings from her and everyone else for a long time. Another month would not present a problem. But there was a better way than speaking, and it would make whatever he eventually said more believable. The outsiders had an appropriate saying.

Actions speak louder than words.

There was much excitement among the household staff of the castle. At last, their lord was taking decisive steps to insure the continuation of his lineage.

“Have you heard?” one maid said to another as they carried trays of tea to other rooms.

“Of course! Everyone knows.”

“Who will they be?”

“I heard he hasn’t decided yet.”

A third maid passing in the opposite direction said, “Court ladies.”

“The Emperor’s or the Shogun’s?”

“Both, of course!”

“Politics and sex,” the first maid said.

The second maid nodded. “Is it not always so?”

“Not for us,” the first maid said, and they both stifled their giggles. They would have laughed out loud if they were not so close to the quarters of lordly men.