Authors: Kim Dare
“Because if he was still alive, I wouldn’t be here,” Bayden finally whispered. “I couldn’t have looked after him and obeyed your rules about how I earn money. I’d have had to stop submitting to you after the six weeks were up and—”
“Bayden,” Axel cut in. “Did you think you’ve have gone back to—” He stopped himself short with the word prostitution hanging from his lips. “To taking bets that looked like scenes?”
Bayden nodded.
Axel made him look up. “That was never going to happen. I know I told you before that saying your safe word would be able to stop
everything
between us. But, that wasn’t entirely true.”
Bayden tried to look down but Axel refused to give him permission to do that.
Bayden cleared his throat. “If you’d still wanted me sometimes, I’d never have said no to you, sir.”
Axel stroked Bayden’s hair back from his face. “That’s not what I mean. You can decide you don’t want to have sex with me. You can decide you don’t want to submit to me. You can say your safe word, or say no, or whatever—there are lots of ways you can stop those kinds of things. But you can’t just decide I should stop caring about you. A word can’t make me stop looking after you. That’s not the way it works—not between men who aren’t playing games together.”
“I can look after myself,” Bayden whispered. “I wouldn’t have expected you to—”
“Your family didn’t expect you to help out, but you did, even after they told you not to.”
Bayden pulled away. “It’s different. I wouldn’t have taken money off you.”
Axel let Bayden sit upright, but he put his hand on his thigh, knowing that the lightest touch would be enough to keep him where he wanted him. “You wouldn’t have taken cash off me to pay your bills, but there are ways I could have made sure you could earn enough yourself, without needing to do things like that.”
Bayden tensed. His leg twitched under Axel’s fingers. Bayden didn’t go so far as to pull away, but when he spoke, his anger was obvious. “If there was any other way, I would never—”
Axel shook his head. “Being human means I have options you won’t have until the anti-pack laws are overturned.”
Bayden folded his arms across his chest.
“Did you know Tolmore inherited his uncle’s house last year? He’s talking about renting out some of the bedrooms. If your mother and grandfather had moved in with him, he wouldn’t have charged them wolf rates. If your mother had been willing to do more than her fair share around the house, that would have meant even less rent. Tolmore’s gay, so you wouldn’t have had to worry about him bothering her—they’d have both been perfectly safe.” He studied Bayden’s expression carefully and weighed each word before he spoke. “You could have covered their bills from your wages here—you wouldn’t have needed to take a penny off me that you hadn’t earned.”
Bayden nibbled on his bottom lip.
“If you didn’t like that idea, then Drac is talking about doing up the flat above his studio. They could have moved in there with a similar deal.”
Axel stroked Bayden’s cheek.
“If you didn’t like that plan, Griz is always complaining he needs someone to sort out his workshop—between doing that and your work in the bar, you could have probably covered all the bills even if they kept paying wolf-rates where they were living before.”
Bayden bit his bottom lip. “I…”
“Is that why you’ve been feeling guilty—because you thought it was his death that meant you could stay with me?” Axel shook his head and stroked Bayden’s cheek, very gently. “Between us we would have found a way to keep your family safe without you needing to do any bets that broke the rules. You’re not here because your grandfather died, pup, you’re here because this is where you belong.”
Bayden slowly unfolded his arms. He closed his eyes. Axel watched as Bayden swallowed several times in quick succession. Without opening his eyes, Bayden leaned forward and rested his head against Axel’s chest again.
“Good boy, I’ve got you.”
“I can learn to be just like a human for you, sir, and—”
Axel put his hand over Bayden’s mouth. “Not an offer I want to hear.”
Bayden waited patiently until Axel took away his hand. “It would be easier for you. It would mean—”
“It would mean I don’t deserve you in my pack,” Axel cut in, allowing no room for argument in his tone. He stroked Bayden’s cheek, just to make sure he knew he wasn’t angry with him. “Telling someone you’ll accept them as long as they pretend to be someone they’re not—that’s not real acceptance. And saying you’ll love someone as long as they lie about part of who they are—that’s not real love, pup.” Bayden tensed at the word love being uttered out loud for the first time. Axel smiled and pressed a kiss against Bayden’s temple. “I won’t be someone who does that.”
Bayden pressed a return kiss against his shoulder, as shy as ever but with just a little bit more confidence this time.
“I love you pup—every bit of you. You’ll never need to lie to me about anything, or to hide anything from me. That’s what real love is all about.”
“I love you too.” He whispered the words into Axel’s shoulder, as if he was too shy to lift his head and say them to his face.
“Enough to agree to be part of my pack?” Axel asked.
“Yes, sir.”
Even though he knew the answer, Axel’s soul still soared at it being acknowledged properly between them. “And my mate?”
“If you want me to, sir,” Bayden whispered.
Axel coaxed him to lift his head. “And my submissive?”
“Your collared submissive,” Bayden specified.
Axel studied where his fingers had automatically slipped down to rest against Bayden’s neck. “Is that a problem?”
Bayden took a deep breath.
It was always going to be their most likely stumbling block. Axel had known that from the start. Asking Bayden to wear something that was more likely to be worn by a dog than a wolf was always going to be hard for him. If wolves had been made to wear them during the Captivities, he’d have been brought up to hate the very idea.
Bayden swallowed. His Adam’s apple bobbed against Axel’s fingertips. “Would it have to be tight, sir?”
“Tight?” Axel echoed blankly, thrown completely off his stride.
“You said I’m not allowed to try to stay human all the time,” Bayden reminded him.
“That’s right.”
Bayden put his hand to his throat. “I think my neck’s bigger when I’m in my wolf shape. If it was looser, I think I could shift with it on and…”
“And it would never have to come off,” Axel finished for him. He nodded, instantly in love with that possibility. “I’ll get one that will fit you all the time—whatever shape you’re in.”
Bayden smiled. A few seconds later, he followed it up with a nod.
Axel stroked his fingers against Bayden’s neck again, finally letting himself enjoy the image of a collar laying there without forcing himself to remember that he might have to learn to live with the fact it could be a reasonable limit for a wolf. His cock hardened, his soul cried out with pleasure, but he did his damnedest not to let either reaction distract him. “You know some things will change once you’re collared?”
“Whatever you want.” Bayden said it with perfect confidence, as if it was the most natural thing in the world for him to submit to Axel in every way there was.
“I want you to give up your place and move in here properly.”
Bayden glanced up at him. “After the collar?”
“No. There’s no need to wait. As soon as we get time to fetch anything you want from there.”
Bayden cautiously placed his hand on Axel’s chest. When Axel didn’t object, Bayden fell into his habit of tracing his tattoos while he thought. “I can pay you the same as I paid for my bedsit, and the garage I rented. You could—”
Axel shook his head.
“I’m not here because I want your money, sir.”
Axel moved his hand to the back of Bayden’s neck and stroked the hair at his nape. “I know that.”
Bayden moved on to one of the tattoos on Axel’s arm. “I always paid my way. When I was living at home, I never lived off anyone else.”
“I won’t play the landlord with you, pup. You can’t pay to live here.” Bayden tensed. Axel could feel the desire to pull away get stronger by the moment. So many men had paid him to do so many things. A landlord wouldn’t be the worst role he could be cast in. “Of course, if you’re just telling me you want to chip in for household expenses, that would be different. There’s nothing wrong with that.”
Bayden looked up.
“Part of your wages can go in the bills pot,” Axel allowed. “And you can keep the rest to spend on whatever you want.”
Bayden nodded.
“But I decide what proportion goes where,” Axel added.
Bayden stopped nodding.
“Alpha’s prerogative,” Axel said. Just as he suspected, that idea sealed the deal. Bayden wouldn’t argue with his alpha unless he had to.
Axel smiled down at Bayden. The way they were snuggling against each other already had them both hard and eager to play.
“What about the money I still owe you?” Bayden said, softly.
“We’ll sort that out before the collar goes on,” Axel decided, pulling his own brain back above his belt once more, with only a little extra difficulty. “A clean slate.”
Bayden smiled up at Axel. His obvious relief left Axel in no doubt that he’d made the right decision. Waiting would be worth it if it let Bayden come to him without anything hanging over his head.
“But that doesn’t mean you’re allowed to do anything crazy to get the money,” Axel reminded him.
“I won’t let you down again, sir.”
Axel brushed their lips together. “There’s no rush. I’ll need time to get a collar that’s just right for you. The thing about wolves not liking silver—is there any truth to it?”
Bayden shook his head.
Axel ran his hand down Bayden’s back and over his caned arse, but he stopped short of starting anything. “If you’re going to be my mate as well as my sub, is there anything else I need to get?”
Bayden looked up at him with a mix of curiosity and confusion.
“Are there any lupine traditions—gifts one wolf gives another when they become mates?” Axel checked. “Or is there a ceremony—like when humans get married?”
Bayden shook his head. “The only thing that matters to us is both wolves knowing who their mate is.” He paused for a moment. “What about you, sir?” The words were soft and cautious.
“Me?” Axel asked.
“What about the other side of the human traditions, sir? I get a collar, you get…”
Axel grinned. “I get you.”
* * * * *
“Do I still need permission to go out, sir?”
Axel looked up from where he had the pub’s accounts spread out across the desk in his office. Bayden had showered and dressed after spending the last couple of hours shifted. It was once more hard to remember that he could ever look anything other than human.
“Go where?” Axel asked.
“Out,” Bayden repeated.
“Do you want to visit your mother?” Axel guessed. “We could…”
Bayden shook his head.
Axel leaned back in his chair and studied him. Bayden stood in the doorway making no effort to actually enter the room. He had his hands pushed deep into his pockets, the way he did when he wanted to make sure he didn’t fidget.
“It’s been a while since we paid our respects to your grandfather,” Axel said.
“It’s nothing like that, sir. I’d just… I’d like permission to go out.”
He’d been cooped up for a while. It wasn’t unreasonable for him to want to kick off the dust and get some air. Hell, after the way he’d wanted to avoid riding after all that bull with Granger, Axel was sure he should be celebrating rather than questioning him. “It’s a couple of hours before we need to open, we could go for a ride—”
“On my own, sir.”
No.
Axel bit back the instinct and forced himself to be reasonable. This wasn’t a kinky little scene. It was real life. As much as he loved the idea of never letting Bayden out of his sight for the rest of his life, it wasn’t realistic long term. “Where do you want to go?”
Bayden shuffled his boots. “It’s not somewhere you’d disapprove of, sir.”
“But it is somewhere you don’t want to tell me about.”
Bayden shrugged.
“What do you want to do there?” Axel tried.
“Nothing that’s against your rules, sir.”
Axel stretched his legs out and crossed his ankles. It had been three days since they spoke about the collar. A certain amount of boundary testing was to be expected. Bayden wanted to be sure that he would be allowed a reasonable amount of freedom before he made that commitment—he wanted to know that Axel would trust him. There was nothing strange about that.
Axel smiled reassuringly. “If you tell me where you want to go and what you want to do, you’ll probably get my permission.”
“Hello?” Griz’s voice called through from the door at the back of the pub.
Bayden looked over his shoulder.
Axel got up. He ruffled his hair as he went to meet Griz. “We’ll talk about it later,” he promised.
Bayden said nothing.
Outside, they found Griz looking very pleased with himself. There was another man with him, still straddling an old Royal Enfield bike. The guy took off his helmet as they approached. Evan.
“You got his bike running?” Axel asked Griz. At the same time, he nudged Bayden toward Evan. “Go on.”
Bayden joined Evan as he got off the bike. Axel kept an eye on them while he listened to Griz rattle off a list of things they’d done to the bike to bring it up to its current standard.
Evan pointed to something on the bike. Bayden had never held a grudge against the boy for helping out in the pub during his punishment. He paid attention to everything Evan said. After a while, Bayden even went so far as to utter a few sentences himself. In werewolf terms, that counted as exceptionally friendly.
Bayden crouched down alongside Evan as they studied a bit of the bike that Evan was apparently especially proud of. Axel couldn’t hear what they said to each other, but the fact a real conversation had developed was promising. Friends among the lifestyle subs, and particularly with one who might well join the Dragons in the future, could only be a good thing for Bayden.