Authors: Mary Helen Bowers
It was a real lesson for me. Becoming more flexible with my eating allowed me to feel satisfied and to stop obsessing over ice cream and chocolate-covered caramels. I found that when I made whole grains and healthy carbs a regular part of my life I suddenly craved less sugar, ate less sugar, and started losing weight.
There are many myths that can sabotage us if we let them. For example, eating at night will not make you fat. This myth has terrified so many women. Many of my clients have asked questions like: “How do I not eat after six PM? I work until then!” or, “Do I need to eat early, when I feed my kids? I like to wait for my partner to have dinner.”
The truth is that it doesn’t matter very much when you eat if you are eating often and eating good foods. If you go to bed at 8:00 PM, you may not want to eat past 6:00. But if you are awake later, eating later is fine. I’m not advocating a big meal at 11:00 PM with espresso and a rich dessert, but having dinner at nine o’clock is not going to ruin your figure. I eat a late dinner all the time—after all, I live in New York City! If I had a rule about not eating after 7:00 PM I would never have another dinner out with friends. In fact, I probably wouldn’t eat dinner at all because I can’t remember the last time I sat down to dinner before seven at night.
Do make an effort to go easy on your alcohol, sugar, and salt consumption, no matter what time of night you are eating. Too much of any of these could disrupt your sleep cycle, make you feel bloated, and lead you to overeat the next day.
Everyone is different in how and when they like to eat. You need to think about and figure out what works best for you. I personally prefer to eat four meals a day. I eat breakfast around 7:00 AM, then I split lunch in two—maybe half a sandwich and fruit around noon, then another small lunch around 4:00 or 5:00 PM. I eat dinner on the late side, usually around 9:00 PM. This might mean I have a small snack before my dinner, around 6:30 or 7:00 PM, but I rarely snack again before bed.
If you work in an office you might not have this flexibility, and if you’re a busy mom you may prefer to eat with your kids. As you tune in to how your body is feeling—full, hungry and just right, then you will be able to decide how and when to eat so that you feel your best all day long.
Here’s another myth that can get in the way of being flexible: you need to eat three square meals a day, no snacking allowed. When it comes to eating, our bodies need different amounts of food and at different times.
One size does not fit all.
It’s true about
fashion, and the same thing goes for what you eat. I’m not going to tell you to eat six mini-meals or three square meals a day with no snacks. Every body is different, and every day is different—for every one of us! I have clients who are grazers by nature and feel best when eating mini-meals all day long. But that doesn’t work for everyone—the key is to find what works for you.
Many diets seem to chain you to your kitchen and your home to make you stay away from trouble. I find these types of eating plans very unrealistic because they are utterly inflexible. I will show you how to navigate restaurant eating and meals on the road, and I’ll give you a usable guide to making the best possible choices when you don’t have an ideal menu offering.
Keep in mind that this program will change the way you live, with flexibility built in. All you need to think about are your own needs and how to embrace them! Just don’t forget to eat breakfast every day. Please!
Katherine on Staying Away from Extremes
I
now stay away from extremes. I learned that you can make simple substitutions that go a long way in how you look and feel—have a piece of cake and it doesn’t have to mean your day is shot. I used to have a triple whole milk latte twice a day, every day; after Mary Helen and I talked about switching to soy or skim milk, I made the change and began to adjust. Now I don’t miss it in a way that’s important to me. I now indulge in a full-fat latte maybe once or twice a month. I also have to say that when I feel healthy and fit, I don’t want to eat a whole cake. The times when I want to eat a whole cake are when I’m feeling lousy because I have already eaten a whole cake!
Most of us have tried and failed when it comes to dieting. Because most diet programs provide temporary weight loss, we are often left with misconceived notions about dieting and how to lose weight. The problem with these programs is that they cannot be maintained, and so they set you up for failure and the dangerous swing of weight loss followed by weight gain.
All women struggle with forgiveness. To be truly happy and healthy, you must find a way to focus on the positive and do what you can do today to make tomorrow better. Forget about the fact that you skipped your workout yesterday, ate fries earlier in the week, and had a brownie with lunch. Health is not all or nothing, and your approach to exercise and eating shouldn’t be either!
This is true whether you’ve eaten dessert two nights in a row because it’s holiday time or you’re on vacation and have had cocktails at dusk for three straight days. My approach to getting in shape and staying in shape is all about forgiveness: if you miss two or three or even five days of working out, I will help you get right back into your schedule
when you can.
By being flexible and forgiving yourself, you can learn to move on when you have too much chocolate cake or polish off a bag of chips without even thinking. Learning to forgive yourself and move forward with your healthy lifestyle even when you don’t make great food choices or miss your workout allows you to regain your balance by making the next meal a healthy one. Treating your body with this type of kindness is truly liberating. It’s a critical step on the road to a healthy relationship with your body and with food.
WHAT ABOUT FASTING?
My clients ask me all the time for my thoughts on fasting. The answer? I’m not a fan. I worked hard to achieve a balanced, healthy lifestyle and would be very wary of anything that might disrupt it. I also think that cleansing encourages bingeing because of its built-in deprivation. While I enjoy the occasional green juice, now that I know the beauty of balance in a healthy lifestyle, I’m just not interested. You do not need to fast with Ballet Beautiful; you only need to focus on filling your body with whole, nourishing, delicious foods and giving your body a challenging workout. Satisfaction, not deprivation, is the word here.
There was a time when my relationship with food was more guilty than forgiving. If I ate an extra slice of pizza or let myself enjoy a cookie, I felt like I’d “blown it” and might as well eat a candy bar and anything else I wanted or craved because I would make up for it by not eating enough calories the following day. Maybe you’ve been there too. But once I learned to be flexible and more forgiving, I found that balance became easy for me, that I could stop this destructive behavior and move on. As I learned to pay more attention to my body, I also realized that once or twice a month my hormones make me crave salty, oily foods like french fries, and that’s okay. I can eat a salad for the next meal, drink some water or tea with lemon, and move on.
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his chapter is chockful of easy-to-use lists of foods to help you substitute for satisfaction, reinforce your weight loss (if that is your desired goal), and live Ballet Beautifully. There are also tips here for shopping and stocking your refrigerator and cupboard with the foods that will always satisfy you—for breakfast, lunch, dinner, and snacks, and some desserts as well!
Whole Healthy Foods: Lists to Live Ballet Beautifully
The food lists provided here essentially cover all the basic food groups—lean proteins, fibrous fruits and vegetables, grains, and dairy. I’ve even included sweet dessert options as well as healthy fats (including some dairy options, olive oil, and nuts). Most importantly, you’ll find foods here that are easy to find at your local grocery or health food store and easy to incorporate into your life. I aim for a mix of lean protein, healthy fats,
fiber, and grains at each meal. This balanced approach to food keeps me satisfied and well nourished.
As you get to know your timing and settle on some dishes or snacks to try, try using these lists to prepare your meals. As I’ve mentioned, I don’t recommend fixating on or worrying about portion sizes—especially if you are eating unprocessed whole foods, with sweet treats in moderation.
Protein
These are suggestions and guidelines—feel free to discover your own favorites!
Fish and Seafood
I try to buy seafood that is fresh, local, and in season whenever possible!
Salmon (preferably wild) Cod Red snapper Blue Fish Flounder Swordfish Tuna steak | Shrimp Scallops Mussels (a favorite bistro meal! Order mussels with a garlic and white wine sauce— Oysters (I eat them raw, not fried) |
Red Meat and Poultry
Yes, meat can be a healthy part of your diet! Choose organic versions of the following when possible:
Extra-lean ground beef Filet of beef Skinless chicken breast (I eat the skin sometimes, as you’ll see in some of the later recipes; again, everything in moderation!) | Top sirloin Turkey breast Lean ground turkey |
Alternative Protein Sources (Including Beans and Nuts)
Beans (black, white, pinto, kidney, cannellini) Eggs (free-range, organic) Lentils Lima beans Nut butter (Almond and peanut butter are my favorites, though there are other varieties, such as cashew. Whatever you choose, read the labels and make sure you choose an organic option with no added sugar or oil.) | Nuts Raw walnuts Raw almonds Raw cashews Unsalted pistachios (undyed!) Tofu Soybeans or edamame |
Dairy
Dairy can be a good source of calcium, protein, and vitamin D, but it can also contain too much fat. So be mindful of your cheese selections and try to stick with skim or nonfat milk. (If you are vegetarian or vegan, you can get your calcium from your veggies, especially leafy greens.)
Fat-free plain Greek yogurt Yogurt cheese Organic string cheese (great for snacks and when you are on the go) Feta cheese | Organic skim milk Fresh, low-salt mozzarella cheese Extra-sharp cheddar cheese |
There are plenty of nondairy substitutes out there. Almond milk is my personal favorite, but soy and rice milk can also be great ways to go. Just check the labels—look for an unsweetened variety, as some nondairy products have added sugars.
Grains
I love the sustained energy that whole grains give me, especially on days when I am working out.
Whole-wheat or multigrain bread Whole-wheat tortillas or wraps for sandwiches Whole-wheat pasta Kamut, quinoa, or brown rice pasta Wild rice | Quinoa Whole-grain cereals, including steel-cut oatmeal, Shredded Wheat, and old-fashioned oats Wheatena (whole-grain cereal) | Oat bran Whole-grain crackers and rice cakes (These are packaged foods and, as such, not exactly “clean eating.” But they also are good sources of fiber.) |
Organic Produce
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t’s expensive, but I try to splurge when I can to buy foods that are pesticide-free. The rule of thumb is to buy organic when you are eating the skin of the fruit or vegetable to reduce your exposure to chemicals. Apples, pears, peaches, nectarines, berries, lettuce and greens, celery, and grapes are at the top of my list for organic foods.
Vegetables
I use vegetables that are versatile and can be prepared in a variety of ways. Frozen spinach, for instance, can be a good choice in the winter, when good fresh veggies are hard to find. Carrots, peppers, and kale are among the vegetables that work well cooked or raw.
Spinach Broccoli Kale Collard greens (Kale, collard, and all of the dark leafy greens are terrific sources of calcium—great for your bones as well as your waist!) Squash Fresh green beans Asparagus Carrots Brussels sprouts Eggplant Yams or sweet potatoes | Onions Peppers (green, red, yellow, or orange) Celery Zucchini Tomatoes Lettuce (Buy organic when possible, and buy all types: romaine, arugula, butter leaf, mixed greens—whatever you like best! But avoid iceberg: it doesn’t have the nutritional impact of other greens.) Mushrooms Cucumbers |