Belong To Me (book 4) (The Fielding Brothers Saga) (22 page)

The smile left Allison’s face. “I’ve come to say goodbye.”

“Goodbye? You cannot leave now.”

“Charlotte, honey, I can’t stay here forever. I’m getting rather bored, and I feel it’s time I go back home.”

Sadness clenched Charlotte’s heart and tears sprang to her eyes. “But what will I do without you?”

Allison laughed. “I think you shall be just fine. In fact, you have been doing just fine without me for more than a week.”

“But I don’t want you to leave. Can’t you and George stay just a little while longer?”

Allison hung her head as she looked at the hands resting in her lap. “I can’t speak for George, but I’ll not be able to stay any longer. I’m sorry.”

Charlotte scrunched her forehead. “What’s wrong, Allison?”

“I believe George has already left to return home.”

“What happened between the two of you?”

Laughing lightly, Allison lifted her gaze, showing watery eyes. “Can you believe he thought I wanted a commitment? He doesn’t, which I already knew, and he thought I was pushing him into marriage.”

“Were you?”

“I might have, I don’t know. I’m in love with him, but to marry again…” She paused and shrugged. “I don’t know how I feel about that.”

“I’m sorry.” Charlotte squeezed her friend’s hand. “Are you all right?”

“I’ll be fine.”

“Would you like to go shopping? That has always cured our unhappiness in the past.”

Allison smiled. “No. I’m on my way home right now. I just dropped by to say goodbye and to wish you luck with Ian.”

“Would you like to stay for tea? I’m certain Lord Thatcher would like to visit with you before you leave.”

Allison shook her head. “He’s already visited with me. He told me I was more than welcome to stay in his castle, but I declined. I’m homesick and wish to return to home.”

“Oh,” Charlotte mumbled softly. “I’ll miss you terribly.”

“Are you still planning on ending your marriage when the month is over?”

Laughing softly, Charlotte shook her head. “I don’t know what I want any longer. I’ve been so confused lately that I just don’t know what to feel.”

“What’s causing you such turmoil?” Allison asked.

She hesitated then whispered, “The other day Lord Thatcher kissed me.”

Allison gasped and clung to Charlotte’s hands. “Then what happened?”

“He’d saved me from the commissioner’s advances, and...” She took a deep breath. “We were caught up in the moment. He was there comforting...I was in his arms...it just happened.” She smiled. “And, I liked it.”

“Oh, Charlotte, no.
What about Ian?”

“I also shared a nice moment with Ian. He told me I held his heart. He promised he’d never cause me to doubt him again.” She shook her head. “I just don’t know what to do. I’m so confused. I have feelings for both of them.”

Allison’s expression turned to humor as a twinkle shone in her friend’s eyes.

Charlotte cocked her head. “This is not humorous, Allison!”

“I know, but I can’t hold it in. For three years you did nothing but make yourself beautiful so your husband wouldn’t be able to resist you, and now you finally have him, you’re not sure you want him?”

“Yes, it does seem rather ridiculous, does it not?”

“How does Lord Thatcher feel about you?”

Charlotte shrugged. “I believe he’s attracted to me. He wouldn’t have kissed me otherwise. He hasn’t declared any intentions toward me other than friendship.”

“I see. But isn’t it true Ian told you he lived like a hermit? Well, maybe he’s just using you, taking advantage of your time of confusion. Maybe he’s after your money.”

“Allison, no.
Adam wouldn’t—” But Charlotte wasn’t certain. How well did she really know him?

“I didn’t think George would give up so easily, either.” Allison shrugged. “Do you think perhaps you have feelings for Lord Thatcher only out of pity?”

“Pity?”
Charlotte shrieked. “I think not! I’ve gotten to know the real man, and there is nothing to pity. He’s a kind and decent human being, not to mention his loving and sweet qualities. Believe me when I say I think he’s a very handsome man inside and out.”

Allison smiled. “I’m glad you think that. But you’re right. You do have a problem.” She patted Charlotte’s hands. “Do let me know which man you choose.”

Charlotte nodded. “I’ll write you.”

Allison leaned over and gave her a hug. “I really should go now. Take care and don’t get into any more trouble.”

“Don’t worry so much.”

Charlotte walked out of the parlor with Allison and as she turned the corner, she saw Adam standing not too far from the door. Charlotte’s heart accelerated. Had he overheard the conversation? She almost hoped he hadn’t, but then he looked at her differently with warmth and tenderness in his eyes. Or was that just her imagination?

Charlotte watched Adam closely as they waited by the carriage and wished Allison a safe journey home. They stood side by side, waving goodbye as the carriage pulled away.

He turned to Charlotte, a soft smile bracketing his mouth. “Are you all right?”

Charlotte shrugged. “I think so.”

“Will a picnic sound enjoyable this afternoon to help lift your spirits?” Adam asked.

She smiled wider, her heart pounding in her chest. “Would you be my escort?”

“Certainly.”

“I think a picnic would be a wonderful idea.”

“I have a basket already prepared. Would you like to leave right now, or do you need to change first?”

“I would like to get a shawl. What do you think?”

“It’s warm today.”

“I should be fine without it.” She stepped to him, hooking her hand through his elbow.

He escorted her out to the waiting buggy, and then turned to fetch the basket, but O’Toole had brought it out, along with a blanket. After thanking the butler, Adam climbed in the buggy beside her.

“Where are we going?” she wondered.

“There’s a spot on my estate that’s just perfect for a picnic. I don’t believe you have been there, yet. A gurgling brook and large oak trees will be our companions.”

“Sounds lovely.”

Adam urged the horses onward as they began their journey. During the short ride, he kept the conversation polite and proper. Charlotte wanted to ask him about the kiss; wanted to know if he had enjoyed it, too. She also wondered if he’d overheard the conversation she had with Allison, but she didn’t dare ask. She watched him out of the corner of her eye, wondering why he was
so
quiet as she regarded him with somber curiosity.

The shaded grove was absolutely beautiful, with a light patch of lavender and yellow wild flowers growing near the green grass where they spread their picnic. Tall trees canopied their little spot, and a clear gurgling spring trickled a few feet away. Everything was perfect.

Adam laid the blanket next to the oak tree then set out the picnic. Charlotte quickly moved next to him to help. The aroma from the roast beef caused her stomach to rumble, and the juicy apples made her mouth water.

“Adam, this smells wonderful. Did you make it yourself?”

“Of course, my dear, since I’ve not hired a cook as of yet.”

She smiled. It made her happy to think he’d take the time to do this for her.

“Mrs. Archibald’s departure was rather sudden, was it not?” he asked.

She swallowed down the bite of biscuit before answering. “Yes. I thought she was going to stay until my month with Ian was over.”

Adam gave her a quizzical look. “Does that mean you don’t plan on staying as Ian’s wife?”

She laughed lightly. “To tell you the truth, Adam, I don’t know what I plan on doing.
Not now, anyhow.”

“Why?”

She shrugged.
“Because I’m confused.”
She shyly met his gaze. “I really don’t know why I’m confessing my personal feelings to you.”

“I was out of line for asking.”

“Oh, no.
I think the reason I say so much is because you’re so easy to talk to. I’ve never known a man like you.”

He smiled. “I’ve never known a woman like you.”

She looked back down at her half empty plate and realized she wasn’t hungry. Setting her plate aside, she gazed back at him. “Adam?”

“Yes?”

“Can we talk about the kiss we shared the other day?”

He quickly looked away. “No.”

His gloved hand lay on the blanket between them. Gently, she placed her hand over his.
 
“Please? I’d really like to get it out in the open.”

Slowly, he turned and gazed deeply into her eyes. “I don’t think I’ll be able to say no to you, especially when you look at me like that.”

“Then will you talk with me about the kiss?”

He blew out a heavy sigh. “What do you want me to say? It happened and it shouldn’t have.”

Now that the moment was upon her, she really didn’t know what to say. Would he admit his feelings about the other day? Laughing lightly, she shrugged. “Why did you kiss me, then?”

He peered down at their joined hands. “Would you hate me if I said I didn’t kiss you just to comfort you?”

Her heart pounded faster. “It would be hard for me to hate you.”

“You were so very beautiful, even with your tears. You looked at me as if I was a real man, and God help me, I couldn’t help myself.”

“But Adam, you are a real man.”

“Don’t talk like that, Charlotte.” His voice was soft, but husky. “You are still another man’s wife, and I shouldn’t have taken advantage of you.”

“You didn’t, I assure you. I’m very grateful you saved me.
And...
I welcomed your kiss.”

His eyes widened. “Why?”

“I think our relationship has progressed nicely, and we’ve become very close friends of late. I think the kiss was meant to happen.”

He pulled his hand away from hers. They sat in companionable silence for several moments. She tried watching the stream babble over the rocks, but her gaze returned to him.

His dark eyes softened. “You must know what kind of emotions are going through me. You are a hard woman to resist, and sometimes I have a devil of a time controlling myself around you.” He raised his hand and grazed his fingertips across her shoulder. “Do you realize how much I want to touch and kiss you like a man does to a beautiful woman?”

“How much?”

Their eyes met, and invisible sparks happened between them. He withdrew his hand. “I mustn’t, and neither should you.”

“Do you know it’s because of my feelings for you that I’m confused about staying with Ian?”

“Don’t say such things.”

“You’re both so different, and I believe it’s the differences that attract me.”

He gulped noisily. “Please stop this insanity right now. My defenses are weakening.”

Bringing his hand up to her mouth, she kissed his gloved fingertips softly then turned and kissed his palm. “Adam,” she mumbled against his lips. “Take off your gloves. I want to feel your hands.”

“No.” He withdrew and stood. “You may be ready, but I’m not. I shouldn’t have even done this to you, considering what you are to me—”

Confusion clouded her mind. “Please explain.”

Turning away from her, he shook his head. “I’ve said too much.”

“Adam, please. I don’t understand.” She stood next to him.

Sighing heavily, he turned toward her. His hand stroked her cheek. “I suppose since your husband hasn’t told you then I must be the one.” He paused, briefly. “Your husband’s family and the
Thatchers
are related. The
Fieldings
and the
Thatchers
are cousins.”

Her eyes widened in shock.
“Cousins?”

“Yes.”

She studied the side of his face that was not scarred, and could finally see the similarities. Both men had high-defined cheekbones and sharp angular noses. “I cannot believe I didn’t see it before.”

“Ian didn’t want you to see it. In fact, I was reluctant to tell you.”

“Why?”

“Because our families hate each other.”

“Is that why it was hard for Ian to agree to living out here while in hiding?”

“Yes.”

“Why should it make a difference?”

The hard lines in his face relaxed and he smiled. “Charlotte?” He cupped her face with his hands. “Don’t you see? Because of you…” He shook his head. “You are married to my cousin, and even though the thought of having you for myself thrills me beyond anything, the fact remains that you’re still married to Ian.”

“But, if after the month is over and I don’t wish to be married to him, he promised he’d grant me the annulment.”

“Is that what you wish? Do you really want to resolve the marriage to a strong and vital man like Ian? Do you really want to give up going into society functions with him on your arm? If you chose me, you’ll not have any of that. You know the sort of life I’m forced to live.”