Belong To Me (book 4) (The Fielding Brothers Saga) (21 page)

“Ian!” she gasped, stepping out of the light. “Do you always have to sneak up on me?”

“Well, yes. I can’t just knock on your door. You know I’m trying to keep myself out of sight. That is why I use the hidden passageways through the castle.”

She arched a brow. “Hidden passageways?”

“Yes. I’ll have to show them to you sometime. I’m quite certain you’ll enjoy yourself.” He stopped in front of her and leaned over, kissing her cheek. “How are you today, my sweet?”

“How am I today?” Her voice rose as she pushed him away. “You really want to know?” She threw her brush. It crashed on her dressing table, knocking over her powder. Charlotte planted her hands on her hips and took two steps backward. “I have had the worst experience of my life…and it was
all your
fault!”

Amusement flickered in the eyes meeting hers.
“My fault?”

“Yes. I went into town to your office, trying to find anything that might help convince the authorities of your innocence. Just as I was leaving, the commissioner arrived, and because I couldn’t succumb to his advances, he took it upon himself to...to...” Her voice broke.
“To attack me!”

“What?” His voice escalated in furious anger. “He touched you?”

Tears quickly gathered in her eyes, her voice barely above a whisper. “Yes. He ripped my dress and forced his disgusting lips and hands on me. I tried to fight him, but he was too strong.” She covered her face with her hands and sobbed at the burning memory.

He wrapped his arms tightly around her and she leaned her head against his powerful chest. “What happened?” Anger tightened his voice.

She tilted back her head and looked up into his face. “Adam saved me.” Her voice was soft.

His brows drew together. “Adam? Do you mean Lord Thatcher?”

“Yes. He saved me from being violated.”

Pain etched itself in the lines of his expression. “Oh, my darling, I’m sorry.” He pulled her to him again. “I’m so very sorry I wasn’t there to save you.”

Charlotte didn’t cry as she had when Adam comforted her. She sniffled. “I didn’t know whether I should trust your servants. O’Toole tried to go with me into town, and I refused his help. Thankfully, he went to Adam. I think we can trust O’Toole after this.”

“Oh, yes, my darling.
We’ll trust him, but where was Ewan Stout while all this was happening?”

The strong steady beat of his heart lulled her, and gave her peace. Finally, she lifted her head and gazed into his eyes. “I don’t know. He wasn’t there. The commissioner said he sent him away.”

Ian’s hand stroked the side of her face lovingly. “Can you ever forgive me for not being there when you needed me the most?”

Wiping her eyes, she turned her back on him. “I suppose, though I wish you had been there instead of Adam…but don’t look so worried. I can take care of myself.”

“I know, and you’ve done that masterfully. But dash it all…I should have been there to protect my own wife!” He rubbed his thumbs across her shoulders.

“No, Ian. We need to clear you from these false crimes before you can be seen in public.”

“No.” He moved closer to her until the buttons on his shirt touched the back of her wrapper. “Let’s leave this place. We’ll escape these charges against me and start a new life somewhere else together, my love.”

“No, Ian.” She turned. His arms slipped around her shoulders, and she rested her hands on his chest. “You are not the kind of man who runs from his problems, and I won’t let you do that now. You need to see this thing through to the end. I don’t want to live my life in fear that you might get hung for a crime you never committed. I don’t want to live every day glancing over my shoulder either.”

Sighing heavily, he nodded. “You are right.” His lips brushed across her forehead. “But, my darling, I don’t want you going into town unless somebody is with you. Do you now see how dangerous the commissioner is? I cannot trust him with the fate of my own life.”

“Yes.” She laid her hand gently along the side of his face. “I shall not go into town by myself again. And, I’m sorry for blaming you. It wasn’t your fault that I was in your office at the same time the commissioner came.”

“Yes it was,” he said sadly.

“No, Ian. It was my fault.”

“But you were trying to help me—” He stopped when his voice caught.

“But if I had listened when you told me to stay here, it wouldn’t have happened.”

“I should kill him for doing that to you.”

“No. Then there will really be a reason to hang you.”

He sighed again, pulling her close to his body as he kissed the side of her face. “Thank you for caring about me. I really don’t deserve it.”

She drew back and looked up into his brown eyes then chuckled. “No, you don’t.”

He smiled. “You didn’t have to agree.”

“I needed to do something to keep you from kissing me.”

One of his eyebrows arched. “Was I going to kiss you?”

“You know perfectly well you were.”

“And you wouldn’t have liked it?” he teased.

A blush warmed her cheeks. “That’s not the point.”

He chuckled deeply. “Oh, Charlotte, how can I keep myself from being near you when you are this breathtakingly lovely? And how can I keep my lips from yours when they are so lusciously inviting?” His lips began descending to hers. “And how, my love, can I keep my heart intact when it belongs to you?”

He’d always seduced her with his words, and this time was no different. She was drawn to him, innocent and uncaring about the outcome, because once his lips touched hers, she was lost in his hungry and exciting kiss. She clung to his shirt, fearing if she broke their embrace, the thrill would die.

His strong hands moved up and tangled in her hair as he met her demanding kisses. She thought this was never going to happen, but it was real, and he was real, kissing her and exciting her just as much as he’d done that night of the masquerade ball.

His hands floated down her neck, slipping inside her wrapper, the tips of his fingers brushing her shoulders as gently as a butterfly. Ian’s mouth left hers and moved down her throat. She didn’t know how it happened or why, but this was exactly what she needed at this particular moment. Ian knew how to pleasure her beyond imagination. She let herself go; allowing his seduction to carry her skyward—but then her mind conjured up an image that made her pause.

Adam’s face held a sad expression it made her catch her breath. As suddenly as it had come, the image changed, and he was the one kissing her with such passion. Her mind screamed for her to stop. What was she doing? Why was she allowing Ian to kiss her so tenderly when not more than thirty minutes ago she was thinking about Adam, and dreaming about him kissing her the way she wanted a man overcome with love to react?

Having this attention from Ian was what she wanted. Wasn’t it? Her heart argued with her head, but it was her body that won out. Ian’s warm and seeking hands excited her, yet the thoughts of Adam left her very confused. She didn’t like feeling this way. What she and Ian were doing was right, because they were, after all, still married, but it didn’t feel right in her heart. Until her heart and her body could share the same signals, she couldn’t let Ian make love to her.

“No, Ian. I cannot do this.” Breathlessly, she pulled away. He reached toward her, but she stepped away.

“Why? What’s wrong?” His voice was deep and still laced with passion.

“I—I can’t do this yet. It’s too soon.”

“But I can tell you are ready. Don’t you remember the passion we shared between us that night at the masked ball?”

How could she forget? She still dreamed about it at night. Taking quick steps, she moved to her bed. She grabbed a pillow to her bosom and lay down, curling her legs up to her stomach. “Ian, there’s no mistake that my body responds to your touch, but my mind and heart are still very confused about many things.”

Ian breathed a few labored breaths, trying to gain control. With a deep sigh, he sat beside her on the bed and softly stroked her leg. “What’s it that you’re confused about, darling?”

She shrugged.

“Is it another man?”

Her eyes widened and her heart quickened. “Another man?” she asked quickly. “What makes you think it’s another man?”

“Well, since George was the reason you came to find me seeking an annulment, I just wondered if...well if you still held feelings for him.”

The rhythm of her heart slowed considerably. “Ian, I know I led you to believe George was interested in courting me, but the truth is, he’s not the reason I sought an annulment.”

“He isn’t?” His luminous eyes widened in astonishment.

“No.” She sat up, still keeping the pillow clutched to her bosom. “To be honest, George is in love with Allison, not me.”

“Then why did you tell me differently?”

She shrugged. “I didn’t want you to pity me. I didn’t want to show you how pathetic I was. I also wanted to make you jealous.”

He studied her expression then brought his hand up and cupped her face. “I’m sorry I was such an inconsiderate fop.” She laughed, which made him laugh. “I suppose your plan worked.” His thumb stroked her cheek tenderly. “It’s now my turn to confess something to you.”

“What’s that?”

“I knew about Allison and George.”

“You knew?”

He dropped his hand. “I didn’t really know about them until after you had moved into my townhouse, but I noticed them together in town one day and could tell they were very much attracted to each other. After that, I put the pieces together.”

She sighed. “Are you angry with me?”

“Why should I be angry?”

“Because I lied.”

He chuckled. “It worked, didn’t it?”

She smiled. “Yes, I suppose, but that doesn’t make it right.”

Leaning closer to her, he circled her in his arms. “You don’t need to suppose, my darling. I grow more and more attracted to you as each day passes. It’s as I told you before, my heart belongs to you and no other. I want you as my wife, Charlotte, and I’ll never give you reason to doubt or mistrust me again.”

Her smile disappeared and she wanted to cry. She had waited so long to hear him say that to her, and now he had, and she was the one who couldn’t return the words because of her scrambled mind.

He crushed his lips to hers. A spurt of hungry desire spiraled through her, and the degree to which her body responded stunned her. They were kissing with so much unreleased passion that she didn’t think she could pull away this time. His kiss melted her weary soul into surrender.

Ian withdrew, smiling. “I shall be patient, my love.”

“Thank you.” Her hand moved up to caress his face. “You have no idea how much I have longed to hear those words from you, but...” She shrugged. “But I need more time to unscramble my mind.”

His hand covered hers and moved it up to his lips as he tenderly kissed the palm of her hand. “I’ll give you more time, darling.”

She nodded. “Thank you for understanding.”

* * * *

She had thanked him for understanding, yet she couldn’t understand it herself. She’d waited so long to hear Ian say such kind and sweet words to her, so why couldn’t she respond the same way? Had she really hardened her heart toward him? Was it too difficult to forgive him for leaving her? Or were her feelings for Adam stronger than she first realized?

Leaning back in her chaise, she pushed her fingers through her long hair, sweeping it away from her face. With a heavy sigh, she realized something must be done about her dilemma, and soon.

Her maid stepped into the room and smiled. “Are you up for a visitor today?”

Charlotte really didn’t want one. She’d planned on staying cooped up in her rooms, but the older woman’s cheerful disposition sparked her interest.

“Who’s calling?”

“Your friend, Mrs. Archibald.”

Charlotte smiled wide and she jumped to her feet.
“Quickly, Clara.
Help me dress.”

The maid hurried and dressed Charlotte in her burgundy day dress with bell shaped sleeves and heart-shaped bodice. The slender skirt dragged behind a small train, making her feel very elegant. She did nothing fancy with her hair, just brushed it until it shone, and then pulled back the sides, tying it with a burgundy ribbon on top her head, letting the curls cascade down her back.

When she hurried downstairs to the parlor, Allison was sitting by herself. Charlotte’s first instinct was to question about George’s absence, but then she wondered why Adam hadn’t kept her friend company.

“Allison!” Happily, she rushed to her friend and hugged her. “I’m so pleased you’re here. I’ve certainly missed you.”

“I’ve also missed you,” Allison replied.

“I would have come to see you today if you hadn’t come first.” She turned toward the chairs. “Let’s sit.”

Allison’s wide eyes scanned the room. “I can’t believe the remarkable changes in this place.”

Charlotte laughed. “Yes, we’ve certainly been busy, and Ian’s servants have been so helpful.”

After they were seated, she patted her friend’s hand. “So, what have you been doing?”