Between a Rock and a Hard Place (41 page)

“That’s so sweet of you.  You didn’t have to come all the way home just to turn around and fly back tomorrow.  I don’t remember the schedule, but I know you don’t have more than two days off between shows.”

“Don’t worry about it,” Tommy said.  “What’s been going on here?  Why haven’t you taken my calls?”

“I’m sorry, baby. I’ve had an incredible week and these last few days were insane.”  She let out a small burst of excited and untimely laughter.  “Insane, but fantastic!  You should have been here when I first got home.  After I fired the head dressmaker, it was a nightmare.  I had to take charge.  I worked closely with the team day and night.  One dressmaker stood out.  Isabella.  She’s a star!  I was so pleased with her work and commitment that I made her the new head dressmaker.  It made sense.”  Jessi nodded, confident in her decision.  “I think she’s going to work out really well.”

“I know how much trouble you were having with that other woman.  I’m sorry I didn’t pay more attention and that I was self-absorbed.”  Guilt echoed in Tommy’s words and he hung his head.  “I should have been more involved with your work.  That’s all going to change from now on.  I’m taking a vested interest.  I want you to design something for me.”  Tommy smoothed his hand down the front of the Ramones T-shirt.  “I should be wearing your clothes instead of these faded rock T-shirts.”  A tiny smile snuck into the corner of his mouth.  “Well, maybe one of your cool jackets to go over my T-shirts.”

She laughed.  Tommy and his T-shirts.  She looked closer at the Ramones shirt he wore.  It was skin tight.  His biceps bulged from the sleeves and the white lettering pulled across his chest.  “What a minute.  That’s not yours.  That’s Angel’s.”

Tommy shrugged one shoulder, a little self-conscious.  “I got to thinking about what Angus said.  I don’t really fit into the image of a punk rock band.”

Jessi rolled her eyes with a smile.  Tommy was trying to be fashionable.  “Don’t listen to him.  If there was something wrong with your look, I’d be the first one to tell you.  Long hair, jeans and hard rock T-shirts.  That’s you.  Your style is as unique as your music in the punk rock genre.” She turned to Angel for confirmation.  “Am I right?”

“Yes.  He decided to invade my closet.  I mean, my suitcase.  I had nothing to do with this.  I love Tommy’s look.  What else has been going here since you’ve been home?”

Jessi brought her hand to her forehead.  There was so much she wanted to share, so many different opportunities that arose in the short time she’d been home.  “I finally got in touch with that journalist from
Vogue
Deutsche
and we did an interview over the phone.”

“That’s wonderful, hon!”  Tommy squeezed in a quick hug.  “When’s it going to run?”

“Let me finish. He had a photographer come to the store and I did a photo shoot. It was amazing! The first half of the interview is going to run next month.”

“First half?” Angel asked.  “They’re doing a follow up?”

“
Vogue Paris
wants to do the second half of the interview and they want to do a cover with the three of us.  We’d only be on the cover of the Paris publication, but both halves of the article would run in the German and Paris issues of
Vogue
.  I can’t believe it!” Laughter bubbled out of her throat and floated into the air.  The cover of
Vogue Paris
would give her worldwide exposure and it was going to showcase some of the flashy stage outfits she made, modeled by none other than Angel Garcia!

“There’s more.  The accountant ran some preliminary numbers.  The store already made a profit!  Do you know what a big deal that is? It’s not a huge margin, but business is thriving!”  She tried to speak slower.  She was rambling from excitement, and she could tell Tommy and Angel were struggling to follow her.  “If business keeps up at this level, I can pay back Ricardo in a year and then, maybe, start thinking about opening another location in the Village.”  Her smile radiated across her face.  She was euphoric.

Both Angel and Tommy had an astonished wide-eyed look on their faces while they processed the profusion of information she shared with them.

“Congratulations, hon!”  Tommy kissed her and pulled her closer to him.

He dropped everything to be with her and she was touched by his devotion.  “I can’t believe that you’re here.”

“This is where I belong.  At your side.”

Angel gently turned her chin with his fingertips so she faced him. He leaned down and kissed her.  It was a strong close mouth kiss that progressed, at his initiation, into one of his full-on panty melting kisses that left her breathless.

He held her chin in his hand and his dark eyes burned into her.  “When I was faced with either proceeding with the tour or coming home to you, there was no question. You need me, I’m here. Familia primero.  That means family first. My dad has instilled it in my head since I was a little boy.”

She took a deep breath and her heart skipped. Angel was a man who took her heart and turned it inside out. Her love for Tommy was simple and pure, with no encumbrances. It was Angel who sent her heart reeling. She hugged them both at the same time.  “I’m the luckiest girl in the world.  I’ve had the most amazing week and you two showing up here to surprise me like this,” her voice cracked, “it may just push me over the edge.  When is your flight back?  Do you have time to stop by the store tomorrow?  I’d love to show you some of the changes I made and some of the new garments that I . . .”

She was cut short by the silent exchange between Tommy and Angel.  They seemed to be waiting for the other to say something.

“I’m not going back,” Tommy said. “I can’t be on stage, doing a show thousands of miles away, when you’re home struggling with your business. It’s selfish.  You need me here.  I can’t leave you to handle all the bullshit by yourself. I want to help you.  It’s only fair.  You’ve done so much for me.”

“For
us
.”  Angel corrected.

Tommy cupped her face in his hands.  A stubborn blond strand fell haphazardly across his forehead, and she brushed it behind his ear while she tried to understand where this conversation was headed.

“None of it means anything to me if you’re not there. I love you, hon. You mean more to me than music.”

She couldn’t believe what she was hearing.  Tommy was giving up the chance of a lifetime to be with her.  He was provoking an overbearing manager and toying with one of the most powerful men in the recording industry. She was so overwhelmed she could barely talk and squeaked out a sentence.  “I . . . can’t believe you would jeopardize your contract.”

“It doesn’t mean anything without you. You’re the reason I never gave up. Without you, I’d be stuck in a dead end band and probably would’ve stopped playing years ago. You encouraged me to keep going. You’re the reason I played my heart out every time I got up on that stage.”

“You would do that for me? You would leave the tour? Are you crazy?”

Tommy and Angel exchanged another awkward glance.  There was obviously more that needed to be said and she waited with a queasy feeling in the pit of her stomach.

It took Tommy almost 10 seconds before he spoke.  “I quit the band.”

Her jaw flopped open.  “What? Why? What happened?”  She imagined a horrific fight with Damien or Jimmy or something horrendous to cause his departure.

Tommy put his hands on her shoulders and his voice was low and intense.  “We were happy when we were here, playing The Quadrangle and neighborhood bars.  Fame complicated everything.  It pulled us apart.  I’m not going to choose touring and working on an album over my marriage.  I’m not going to be away from you for months at a time. Nothing is worth ruining what we have.  I’m not jeopardizing it for fame or a record deal, not for the world.”

Leave Immortal Angel? Jessi’s head was spinning.  She put her fingers through her hair and clamped her hands down on her head.  Her eyes darted around the floor, followed by her erratic breaths.  She would never let him go through with it.

She snatched her cell phone off the table and started dialing Mr. Abelman’s personal number.  “I’m not letting you do this, Tommy.  You can’t throw away – ”

“It’s not your decision.”  He pulled the cell phone out of her hand and pressed the off button.  “My place is by your side.  You said I had no time for you.  I’m making time for you.”

She was frantic. Her heart was beating against the wall of her chest.  Although she never fully admitted it to anyone, she always associated herself as being part of the band. She was attached, bonded. Addicted. Music fueled her body.  The band wasn’t a hobby; it was sustenance. It called her to the stage.  She couldn’t live without the rock and roll lifestyle any more than she could live without the blood in her veins.  Music was her calling.  Designing was her hobby.

Leave the tour and the glamour and the fans? The adrenaline of the stage, the electricity of the crowd and the chant of the audience?  Never!  Tommy was giving it up for
her
, but it was the last thing she wanted.  And where did that leave Angel?  She looked into Angel’s eyes and at his face.  He looked almost as distraught as she was.  His brows hunkered down over dark eyes that bore pain and his face drooped with sadness.  It broke her heart just to look at him.  She had to summon the courage to ask him what his intentions were.  “What about you?” she asked softly.  “Immortal Angel is dead without you.”  The words caused a fresh wave of nausea to roll through her belly.

It took Angel a long time to answer.  “Immortal Angel is dead without either one of us.”

Jessi’s heart crumbled and fell into the nauseous pit of her stomach.  It was crushed, pulverized, at the thought of the band’s dissolution. “No.  No!”  She threw her arms out to the sides, palms facing up to the ceiling.  “Are you both crazy?  I don’t want that!  Immortal Angel is everything I worked for!  It’s my heart and soul!”

“But it took up all my time,” Tommy said.  “This tour was the worst thing that ever happened to us. It’s not going to get any easier and I’m not losing you because of it.”

“We’ll work it out.  That’s why I quit my job at Falcon.  I won’t get bogged down with meaningless tasks all day and we’ll have more time to spend together.  Do you think I could stay away from the band and the stage? Don’t you remember the first time I saw you play at that little bar, when we first started dating? I was awkward and out of place. I was boring. I blended into the crowd.  You called me on stage before the show started, and that’s when the sheer excitement of it hit me, and you hadn’t even start playing yet. Then when you played me your fist guitar solo, I felt like I was about to explode. You transformed me into the person I am today. I could no sooner stay away from the limelight of the stage than I could stop designing.  It calls me. It feeds my soul.  I need to be part of it.  It’s my destiny.  Resigning from Falcon Records will give me the freedom I need to work on my designs, and pick up and fly back to New York if we’re on tour and there’s a problem.  I could never do that while I worked for the label.  Now I have everything I ever wanted.  My dreams have found a way to co-exist.”

Angel looked a little more hopeful, but Tommy was resilient.  “I can’t go back to the way things were.  It was too much pressure.  And you shouldn’t have to give up your job with Falcon so we can have more time together. I needed to do something, for us, and I did.  I walked away.”

Jessi closed her eyes and slowly shook her head.  Oh God, this couldn’t be happening.  “Please, Tommy, find another way. I don’t want this.  You’re breaking my heart.”

His shoulders dropped and he sounded exhausted as he sighed.  “I don’t want to break your heart, hon. I want to make you happy.”

“Then please call Mr. Abelman and tell him you made a mistake.  Tell him you were drunk.  Tell him anything. Just tell him you didn’t mean to walk out on the tour.”

He glanced at Angel and then back at Jessi, but he still had that same deadpan look on his face.  “I didn’t want to leave the band.  But I can’t have Angus breathing down my neck for song composition every free moment that I’m not on stage.  I need time to spend with you.  I need a life, too.”

“Then tell Mr. Abelman that.” She tried to hand Tommy the phone, desperate for resolution, but he didn’t take it.  She looked at Angel and her pleading eyes begged him to help her.

“Actually,” Angel said, “Tommy never told Mr. Abelman directly.  He told Audra.”

Audra was the band’s salvation.  Jessi knew that Audra loved Immortal Angel as much as she did and Audra would fight just as hard for its existence.

Jessi shoved the phone into Angel’s chest.  “Call Audra.  Explain that it was a mistake.”

Angel took the phone.  It was clear that he wanted to make the call, but he looked at Tommy for the OK.

Tommy took the phone from Angel and put it in his pocket.  “You’re not listening to me, Jessi.  If I go back, everything is going to be exactly the same.  I’m still going to spend every minute in the studio or on stage or at an interview.  I’d be spending all my time with Angel, even though we would be working, and not with you.  That’s not fair to you and it’s no way for us to live.”

“Wait a minute.”  A light flickered behind Angel’s eyes.  “Audra can help us, Tommy.  She specifically asked me if Angus was working us too hard.  She said that she arranged it so we could have two days off.  I’ll bet she has some kind of pull or rank over this guy.  She could talk to him about lightening up our schedule.”