Bigfoots Don't Do Mini Coopers (Kate Storm Book 1) (22 page)

Aunt Tabs scowled, Al snarled some more and Morgan ignored all o
f us. “He’s a Demon Lord, Aunt Tabs. He really didn’t mean to hurt Kate. He flared up and Kate forgot to cast a spell.”

My aunt whirled back to me. “
You forgot to cast a spell?”

My UDBF just couldn
’t resist throwing me in the cauldron tonight. I wondered where my phone was with certain incriminating photos?

“
It happened rather quickly.” Defensive spell casting was not a subject my Aunt took lightly. “But I bought some Flame Away so we don’t have to worry anymore.”

“
They still make that?”

“
Yep. What’s more it can be applied directly to the naked skin now.” I realized what I’d said when Al growled and Aunt Tabs narrowed her eyes. I rushed on to add, “and it comes in a variety of scents.” I let go of Al and held out my arm. Aunt Tabs dutifully sniffed.

“
Oh. It reminds me of your body lotion.” She sniffed again. “What other scents do they have?”

“
Ya wouldn’t need to worry about bein’ burned if the demon weren’t around.” Al snarled from the crook of my elbow.

“
I’m not going anywhere, little furball.” Ash growled.

“
Who ya callin’ little?” Al demanded, his tiny body stiffened from nose tip to tail. I smashed my foot down on Ash’s before he could reply.

An odd growl interrupted the rapidly deteriorating conversation. We all turned to see Harley sitting up in t
he middle of my pull-out, glaring at us.

Her eyes widened just as the metal legs groaned and the pull-out collapsed. Harley, the thin mattress and the buckled metal all ended up on the floor. The main frame of the couch lifted at least a foot into the air,
wobbled for a moment before the metal frame gave up all together and the sofa crashed behind her. Two legs broke on one end and the sofa settled into a lopsided slant.

“
I think it’s time Harley went home, dear,” Aunt Tabs patted my shoulder.

25. Bigfoot Goes Home. Finally.

The silence might have been uncomfortable, but I was rather thankful for it. 1) I didn
’t know what to say to my Aunt to convince her Ash was a nice demon. 2) Morgan was still sulking  about returning Harley. 3) Sitting next to Ash always got me hot and bothered and I was afraid if I tried to say anything I’d start talking about bjs.

Not a good idea with my aunt in the back seat.

Al rode in the back of the truck with Harley.

I couldn
’t wait until she was out of my life. You know, since she belonged in the woods. And not on my broken pull-out. And she was fully healed. And didn’t really like me. And Al would sleep with me again.

Ok, mostly because Al would sleep with me again. But my other reasons were still valid.

Just not as important.

“
It’s just around this corner.” I pointed out the spot through the windshield.

It was a few minutes after seven, which meant we had another three plus hours before it actually got dark. The sun still shone brightly, although some of the shadow
s were a bit more elongated.

“
I know exactly where you were hurt, Kate,” Ash growled.

I could tell the memory bothered him. The emotion in his voice made my chest swell with warmth. We were still together and Ash cared. Pretty damn amazing after the last f
ew days.

I sighed.

Morgan echoed my sigh. Unfortunately, hers wasn’t as giddy as mine.

I turned to look at her. “
It’s for the best, Morgan. You know she can’t stay with us. She belongs in the woods.”

“
I know.” She didn’t sound convinced.

“
If you don’t want a cat, how about a rabbit?” We’d all agreed a dog would not be a good idea. Except for Ash, he thought Morgan should get a dog. A female Chihuahua.

Like I said, I hadn
’t minded the silence after his comment.

“
I don’t want a rabbit, Aunt Tabs.” No. What Morgan really wanted was her very own Bigfoot. I didn’t understand it. Usually, I think of Morgan as ruthless and bloodthirsty.

Now I could add slightly unreasonable.

I was also beginning to think my Duck and Dodge instincts were hereditary.

“
Maybe you could visit her?”

Morgan perked up. “
You think she lives close by?”

I didn
’t know. I just knew where I’d hit her in the first place, but it seemed logical.

I glanced at my Aunt and she shrugged. She didn
’t get it either.

Morgan frowned. “
I’ve hunted in these woods before. I can’t believe I missed seeing her.” That made two of us. Not much got past Morgan.

“
I can’t believe Bigfoot really exists.” Morgan turned her head to check on Harley in the bed of the pick-up, as if she thought Harley might simply disappear.

And it suddenly hit me. Morgan didn
’t have pet issues. She was entranced with something new. She was an ancient being who had been everywhere, done everything and seen everything. Except Bigfoot.

In her shoes, I
’d probably consider kidnapping Harley. At least for a little while.

Morgan turned back around with a distinctly calculating look in her bright green eyes. Maybe she
’d like a ferret?

Ash slowed his truck and pulled off the road. The shredded remains of my umbrella dangled limply from a large
pine tree across from where we were parked.

I didn
’t remember the two track road Ash parked on, but it had been extremely dark and extremely rainy. And I’d run over Bigfoot. I’d had other things on my mind.

I was about to open my door when Harley sat up an
d began growling and pointing in front of us.

“
She wants us to follow this road.” Morgan’s eyes glowed with excitement. I thought Harley could walk quite comfortably from here.

“
Maybe she wants to show us her home? Do you think there are more of her kind?”

Sweet Glinda, I sincerely hoped not.

Morgan and my Aunt rolled down their windows, peering at the forest as we drove along. Even Ash sat forward as if in anticipation.

I crossed my arms over my chest. Honestly, couldn
’t we just drop her off anywhere on this road? Did she need a tree front drop off?

“
Can either of you see Al? Is he all right?” I wasn’t keen on him riding in the back of the pick-up, but he’d started talking about guns and Ash had started growling and I’d realized Al couldn’t reach the top of the sides in the back of the truck.

Plus Aunt Tabs and Morgan had promised to keep an eye on him.

“Harley’s holding him.” Morgan smiled.

“
Isn’t she sweet? She’s got him cuddled right up to her chest.” Aunt Tabs reached over the seat and patted my shoulder. “Don’t worry, dear. Al’s just fine.”

Wonderful.

I slumped down in my seat and tuned out Morgan and my Aunt as they discussed the possibilities of where Harley lived and whether there were more creatures like her.

Ash
reached over and squeezed my leg. “We’ll find a good place to set her free.”

Frankly, I thought any place for the last two miles along this road looked pretty damn good.

Harley started howling. I jerked upright, afraid something might have happened to Al. I turned in time to see Harley smack her fist against the side of the truck. Al was tucked under her other arm.

“
I think she wants us to stop.” Morgan nearly vibrated with the force of her excitement.

Ash stopped in the middle of the two rut road. I doubte
d anyone had driven it in months, possibly years and there wasn’t a place to pull off to the side.

Thick pine trees interspersed with leafy aspens blocked any view beyond five or six feet. Deadfall and various bushes shrouded the ground in a dense, tangled
mess. Pretty much the same view as anywhere along the drive.

I knew we could have dropped her off sooner.

We all got out. Morgan came around to the same side of the truck Aunt Tabs and I were on when Harley jumped to the ground next to us. Al still tucked under her arm.

Morgan swatted at a branch. “
Do you live around here?”

I heard the hood of Ash
’s truck groan a second before his large body landed next to me. My back hit hard steel as Ash moved in front of me, pressing me between his body and the truck.

I
opened my mouth to ask what the heck he was doing when the vegetation moved. Actually moved. As in several of the bushes unfolded and rose up. And up. And up.

I gripped the back of Ash
’s shirt in one hand and my wand in the other. A quick glance to the side assured me Morgan and my Aunt were backed up against the truck as well. Aunt Tabs held her wand and Morgan’s fangs were on display.

Al growled from Harley
’s forearm.

Giant, furry creatures stood in front of us. A few stood on the other side of the truck
and several moved to block the road as well.

We were surrounded by Bigfoots.

Every one of them had to be Ash’s height at a bare minimum. They each had the same small dark eyes, flattened nose and wide mouth as Harley.

Unfortunately, that
’s where the resemblance ended. Leaves, sticks and small branches matted most of their fur. My eyes began to water.

Harley came by her hygiene habits - or lack thereof - honestly.

I cupped my hand over my mouth and nose at the same time Ash did.

“
Hrry, An Tbs.” I glanced over at Morgan’s muffled words, blinking to clear my stinging eyes. Aunt Tabs held her wand out, casting her spell as Morgan leaned on her other arm. I sincerely hoped it worked because there was no way I planned to lower my arm so I could cast a spell.

I was quite positive I
’d pass out first.

And I
’d thought Harley smelled bad.

My eyes quit watering and I cautiously lowered my arm. I nudged Ash. “
You can lower your arm. Aunt Tabs cast a spell.” I coughed. “It isn’t perfect, but you can breathe.”

Ash lowered his arm, coughed a few time. It smelled like the garbage was in the room with us, but the lid was on the can. And there was a small breeze.

I started to edge around Ash, but he shoved an arm back to block me in. “Stay behind me. I don’t know if they are friendly.”

He had a point. Plus I was pressed up against him. If he didn
’t want me to move, I didn’t plan to argue.

Harley began uttering low growls. She gestured towards us with one large furry hand. I sincerely hoped she was introducin
g us and not accusing us of attempted murder and kidnapping.

I
’d done my best to explain what I could to her several times, but the not-speaking-the-same-language thing had made it a bit difficult.

Al quit growling and sat up higher on Harley
’s arm. One of the Bigfoots moved forward. It stood almost a foot taller than Harley. I gripped my wand tighter and held my breath. Morgan tensed as it approached. She was close enough to lash out if it attempted to hurt Al.

The creature stopped a foot away. It raised
one massive hand. I lifted my wand and started the words to a spell guaranteed to zap it.

It sniffed loudly. Reaching out, it stroked sharp claws through the soft and heavily conditioned fur around Harley
’s face. It grasped her hand and ran its thumb over her cranberry nails.

Then it started to purr.

I was beginning to get a funny feeling about the relationship between these two.

The Bigfoot leaned forward and rubbed its cheek against Harley
’s. She rubbed back.

Yep. Definitely together.

“Hey buddy, ya wanna take it back a step or two?”

The Bigfoot jumped and growled, Morgan stepped forward and Harley pulled Al into her chest.

I was happy Harley felt so protective of Al, but I was happier still she had a boyfriend. I wanted my Chihuahua back.

“
Quit snarlin’ at me jackass or I’ll break your leg.”

Preferably before he got himself killed.

The Bigfoot snarled some more at Al. Al bared his tiny teeth.

I pushed against Ash
’s back. “I’ve got to get Al before the Bigfoot hurts him.”

“
He could stand a little . . .”

I shoved Ash hard. “
Don’t even think it.” I pushed again. I might as well been trying to move a three ton bolder. “Would you please move?”

“
You are not going anywhere near that creature. Besides, it looks like Harley has things under control.”

I turned to
look. Harley had Al tucked under her chin while she waved her other fist at the giant Bigfoot. He didn’t look happy. I wasn’t either. I really wanted my Chihuahua back.

Suddenly all the Bigfoots, including Harley, froze. They all turned towards the back of
the truck.

Claud Potier jumped out of the woods. He was dressed head to toe in leafy camouflage. The sunlight glinted off his round glasses and the barrel of the gun he held pointed straight at us.

****

Something seemed off about Claud’s gun, but I couldn’t quite figure out what. Then again my brain doesn’t work at optimum levels when faced with lethal weapons.

Ash subtly shifted his body so he stood firmly planted between my mortal self and the crazy man with the big gun. I gripped his waist and pee
ked around him. Harley and Al stood closest to Claud and his gun.

I didn
’t know how much damage a gunshot could do to a Bigfoot. I could imagine all to well what it could do to my Chihuahua.

My breath hitched.

“Well, well. What do we have here?” Claud Potier was going to completely ruin my image of Santa. His voice still sounded as cheerful as it had the first time we’d met. And despite the gun, with his portly figure and the leafy camouflage, he rather resembled an extremely healthy and well-watered bush than a potentially murderous xenologist.

“
A genuine, real live Bigfoot.” Claud practically sang out the words. If he hadn’t been holding a very large rifle, I’m sure he would have clapped his hands. “A whole group of Bigfoots. This is even better than I’d hoped,” he chortled. “I’m going to be famous! My picture will be on the cover of every magazine.”

“
I’ll be forever famous as the scientist who discovered Bigfoot!” Claud certainly didn’t try to limit his aspirations.

“
The xenologist, I presume?”