Blizzard (The Brotherhood Journals #1) (24 page)

Rose was one of ours, and they’d fucked with her in the worst way imaginable.

Skins lifted his chin at me in understanding, as if he could read the thoughts running through my head.

Enough was enough.

We were going to finish this.

I’d spent most of the day before holding her hair back as she vomited, curled up next to the porcelain toilet. She was in so much pain it was almost unbearable.

I’d done this. Because of me and my ability to hold onto the most ridiculous grudge, she had been doped up to the eyeballs. The come down was fucking painful and I was going to be here with her the whole time.

There was a soft knock at the door.

I’d managed to carry Rose’s limp body to the bedroom just after finally getting her in a shower and some food in her stomach. Mom had to help as Rose was alert, but her body was aching and she was weak. I sat back against the headboard with her head in my lap and my fingers threaded gently through her hair.

Skins was in and out, checking on her regularly, and helping me to force some kind of fluid into her body. We’d had a doctor on Judge’s payroll come and look her over just to be safe. Her vitals told us she was fighting back, I expected no less from her.

“Come in,” I offered quietly, trying not to wake the sleeping beauty.

The door creaked softly as it opened and Optimus slipped through the small space before shutting it again.

“How is she?” he asked, staring down at her sleeping form.

I shuddered, just the memory of her writhing on the kitchen table as Skins attempted to hold her still haunted me. “Meth, they doped her up on meth, man.”

Op’s face scrunched up. “How much did they fucking give her?”

“Not much, but she mentioned something about her drink being laced when she finally got consciousness. Doc reckoned it was the combination of both. A fucking toxic cocktail, strong enough to make her so fucking sick that she’s spent almost the last twenty-four hours shaking and crying and that was after she was done puking.” I squeezed my free hand into a fist. I was filled with rage. If it hadn’t been for Judge and his boys having to practically restrain me yesterday, I would have gone over there and shot up the whole damn place. But I had to remember, Lane was still in there, and if they could do something like this to a woman that they liked—what would they be doing to someone they held prisoner?

“Judge called. Let me know what was happening. Thought I should be here to support you.” He took a seat on the edge of the bed, watching me carefully like I could explode at any moment.

“You mean stop me from doing something fucking stupid,” I corrected dryly.

He shrugged. “We all know that despite your protests that you care about her, Blizz. I ain’t ever seen you this wound up over a girl before.”

“I was wrong.” The words fell out, they felt foreign. “She doesn’t deserve this. I was wrong.”

“Marco really pulled a number on her,” he said with a tilt of his head. “We all wanted to hate her for the lies and shit that she pulled, but she was just the puppet. She had no control when he was pulling the strings.”

I twirled her hair delicately in my fingers, the gritty straw-like strands a testament in itself to what this was doing to her body.

“We need a plan B, brother,” I told him, unable to remove my eyes from her face. The second the drugs had begun to wear off and she finally opened her eyes and saw me, she broke down. Her fight was done, and she trusted me to watch over her while she fell apart. And that’s exactly what I was going to do. “Can’t send her back in there.”

Op nodded, but it was her voice that broke the silence. “I have to go back.”

“Bullshit,” I stated clearly. “You could’ve fucking died.”

I’d talked to Skins briefly. He said it was more than likely whatever they had put in her drink that had made her this sick as opposed to the meth. That actually may have saved her life, counteracting the effects of the other and waking her body up long enough for her to get out of the house.

She reached up and rubbed at her head gently. “How long have I been out?”

“It’s been a good thirty-six hours.” I felt her body tighten at my words. “You going to be ready to talk about it soon?”

She nodded her head against my leg. It brushed gently up against my cock and I could feel myself begin to harden. Fucking uncomfortable with my president sitting five feet away. I knew Rose could feel it, though, her body stilling instantly.

“Give me fifteen to wake up properly, and then we can talk,” she muttered.

Op nodded. “I’ll go and make coffee.” He dipped his head at me before leaving with a soft click of the door.

“I would get up, but A) I still don’t have the strength, and B)…” she cleared her throat, “I’m scared to let this moment end.” She still wouldn’t look up at me, opting to stare across the room at the blank wall decorated only with a couple of tears in the worn out wallpaper.

I knew that I should help her up, help her get dressed, and head out to where the others waited for us. But I was being selfish. Not ready just yet to let her go. “I can solve those.” I tucked my hands under her armpits and pulled her almost limp body up. Her hands came to rest on my chest, her head tucked into the crook of my neck as her legs rested on either side of mine. “Moment’s still here and you didn’t have to use any strength at all to move.”

Soft laughter tickled my neck followed by a muffled whimper.

“Rose? Are you okay?” I wrapped my arms around her center, pulling her against my chest.

“I feel like I’ve just done five days’ worth of crunches,” she admitted through gritted teeth.

I snorted humorlessly. “Yeah, vomiting for hours on end can be quite a workout.”

“I was fucked, wasn’t I?” Her lips played against my neck as she spoke, the sensation shooting little electrical bolts straight to my manhood.

My fingers danced across her bare back. Mom had helped to get her into a pair of sleep shorts and a cropped top. I was trying not to let myself get carried away, but her skin felt so soft under my fingertips and I couldn’t help the trance that they left me in as my hands brushed across her skin.

“That feels good,” she murmured.

“How’s the rest of your body feel?” I asked softly, massaging at the base of her spine. I swear I could almost hear her purring like a cat.

“Broken.”

I stilled. I’d done this, I’d let her feel like she needed to prove something, and because I was an asshole she’d almost died.

Moving my hand up her back, I used it to cup the back of her head. My fingers tightened gently in her hair, and I used the pressure to pull her face back so our eyes met. In that moment, it was like I was looking at her for the first time. Even with the dark circles under her eyes and her cracked lips, she was fucking beautiful. Her wide hazel eyes stared at me, she was like a delicate doll, and my hands held her with care.

“I’m sorry,” I choked. “I never wanted this to happen.”

It was true. I never expected things to go this far. I never anticipated what lengths she would go to, to prove to the club and to me that she was more than what we labeled her.

“You don’t have to say you’re sorry.” She licked at her lips.

“I shouldn’t have pushed you to the point where you thought you needed to do what you did. We… I made you feel like you had no other choice,” I admitted. My other hand moved up her thigh and cupped the underside of her perfectly toned ass cheek.

“I’m not that naïve little girl anymore, Blizzard. I’m fully aware of the choices I’m making,” she whispered softly. Her eyes slipped shut and she leaned her head into my palm.

“Sad to say, baby, but this next choice won’t be yours to make.” I squeezed her ass causing her to grind gently down on me. I held back a groan. “You’re not going back there.”

Her bright eyes popped open once again, but this time, I saw something different. Pure determination. “I can get her out. I’ve come this far, you can’t stop me now.”

My fingers tightened in her hair and she let out a delicious gasp. It wasn’t from pain, though, I could see the anticipation in her eyes.

“You can’t stop me.” The words were meant to be strong, they were meant to be defiant, but all I could hear was desire. She was challenging me. Her hands slipped down my chest, searching for the hem of my shirt. They were cold and sent a shiver through me as she slipped them underneath the fabric.

“Watch me,” I told her softly before my mouth crashed down on hers. It was like coming home. Our lips tangled together, melding into one.

I felt her lifting my shirt higher and we broke just for a second as she pulled it over my head and tossed it to the side. Her breathing now was harsh and her skin was flushed in a soft shade of crimson.

I growled, my hands going straight to her hips and pressing her down onto my straining jeans. “Tell me he never got close to this,” I demanded, my voice low as she wiggled her body, searching for some kid of friction. I was scared since she’d been passed out for a while in that house that they had done something to her. I knew she would be able to feel it in her body if they had.

“No,” she gasped. “He never did.”

“Good.” I spun our bodies so she was lying flat on her back, and I was pinning her down. Her legs went around my waist and she hooked her ankles behind me, pulling me closer—like that was even possible. Every inch of us was already touching and the feel of her against me was something I was not going to risk losing.
Ever.

I lapped at her neck, my tongue trailing down her collar bone.

“Blizzard,” she moaned softly. “Please, I need you.”

Just as I was about to declare everything—how much I wanted her—there was a harsh knock on the door.

“What?” I snapped, never taking my eyes from my woman.

That’s right.
Mine.

“Rose’s phone is blowing up with calls and texts, brother. We need to sort this shit,
now.
” Optimus’ tone had gone from caring friend to Brothers by Blood President and I knew that this wasn’t a request. This was an order, sort my ass out now before we hit shit creek.

“Yeah, coming,” I called back.

“Now,” was all he said before I heard his footsteps heading back down the hall.

Rose’s body sagged and she let out a disappointed sigh.

“We get this done, then you’re mine.” She nodded, slightly apprehensive.

What I think she didn’t realize was that I wasn’t just talking about today.

I was talking about forever.

Because the burn I felt inside had become more than a simmer, it was a fierce fire and I’d be damned if anyone got in the way now of it burning.

My head was pounding and I felt like the drugs were still soaring through my body.

I felt like I was dreaming—this must be a dream.

Blizzard treated me with such gentle hands, helping me get dressed, holding my pants for me as I steadied myself on his shoulders. His mouth was tight and his hands skimmed up the back of my legs as he pulled up my jeans. My heart was racing, the moments we had shared just a few days and moments ago, still fresh in my mind. I wanted his touch now more than ever.

Hanging out with Edge and his goons had made me feel dirty, like an addict and a whore. The way they leered at me made me want to curl into a ball and hide away in a corner. Not that they weren’t good looking guys—most of them were—but they looked at me like I was a piece of meat and they were ready to rip me to shreds with their teeth.

“You okay?” My daze cleared and Blizzard was now standing in front of me, looking down at me curiously. He towered over me, and at one point I had found that intimidating, but now I didn’t. I felt protected by this huge man who’d spent his time holding me and comforting me as I fell apart.

His large hands held my waist and I begged for him to use them to lift me up and press me against the nearest wall. But that would have to wait. Optimus was here, as well as Judge and his boys, and they were waiting for us so we could discuss what our next options were.

“Yeah,” I sighed, straightening my shoulders and lifting my chin.

He smiled. “That’s my little soldier.”

I felt a sense of pride soar through me as he tugged me behind him and out of the bedroom. My legs were still reasonably shaky. Who the fuck knew that meth could be so strong? How people did it day after day, I would never know. I guess their bodies slowly became accustomed to it.

He held my hand as we approached what was now a packed full living room. I was slightly stunned at a number of bikers that could fit into the small house Jackie and Judge called home. Some wore the Brothers by Blood colors, others wore Satan’s Sanctuary patches, including Blizzard’s mom, Jackie, who wore her property patch with pride.

She caught me out of the corner of her eye and immediately weaved through the men toward us. She gripped my shoulders in her hands, her eyes roaming my body as if she was in shock that I’d survived.

“Thank the fucking Lord.”

“I’m not sure the Lord’s name is meant to be used next to the word fuck,” Slider, one of Blizzard’s brothers commented sarcastically.

“What if it’s a holy fuck?” Wrench commented dryly.

Slider seemed to consider that for a second before bobbing his head up and down. “This is true. I retract my previous statement.”

“Idiots! My club is full of idiots,” Optimus groaned.

I watched as Jackie took inventory of my body. I don’t know if she was looking for bruises or injuries, or if she was just looking for confirmation that I wasn’t dead.

A loud, obnoxious ringtone went off, filling the small space. It took me a minute to realize that it was mine.

Optimus held up my cell phone as it continued to buzz excitedly in his hand. “It’s been going off continuously for the last hour.”

“Edge?” I asked with a sigh.

He nodded. “Text messages, too. Seems our boy is quite concerned about you.” The tone of his voice wasn’t accusing, but there was a subtle question there.

Why was this guy so worried about where I was?
I knew the answer.

“We talked…” I told the group softly. Blizzard’s hand tightened on mine. I looked up at him and whispered, “It’s okay.”

“Rose,” Optimus warned carefully. “What did you talk about?”

“He doesn’t trust his brothers. He’s got an Old Lady back home, and from my point of view, it seems that they sent him on this mission to get him out of the way so she could whore herself around the club,” I explained Edge’s story to them. I felt for the guy. With his entire family part of his club, he felt as though that was his legacy as well.

Turns out we had more in common than I thought.

Blizzard scoffed beside me. “He’s trying to get into your pants.”

I ignored him, instead looking to Optimus for support. “He’s different than them. He feels like he has to be there because that’s his family.” I tapped my chest. “Until recently, I knew that feeling well.”

“Why are you standing here defending him?” Wrench asked, his eyebrow raised. “Cool, he’s not a bloodthirsty killer that we assumed him to be. Good to know. But he still has the kid locked up there in a room.”

Wrench was right, he may have his ideas and loyalties all fucked up, but he was still holding her there and it was my job to get her back.

I nodded. “Yeah, you’re right.” I held out my hand to Optimus. “Let me text him back, so he stops freaking out.”

He placed it in my palm, the second he did it began to ring. I hit the answer button quickly and held it to my ear. I turned to look at Blizzard, who glared at me, knowing I was about to do something that was going to make him furious.

“Hello,” I answered casually.

“Fuck, Lily. I’ve been trying to get a hold of you since fucking yesterday.” He didn’t sound angry, more relieved.

“Yeah, well, I was coming down off that shit. I can’t believe you let them shoot me up!” I was angry, this emotion was real.

He groaned, “Baby girl, I’m sorry. These boys, they don’t fuck around. It was a test—”

“You test people by drugging them?” I sneered.

“It’s more to see what they’ll do in order to be part of the club. Look, I’m sorry. I wasn’t expecting shit to be so strong and it knocked me out. Woke up and you were gone…” his voice turned reticent, “…thought maybe they’d done something to you.”

I looked around the room that I stood in, all these men—and women—they had complete and utter trust in each other. When you were part of their family, you never had to worry about them going behind your back, or talking shit, or hurting you. Because that’s not what a family was about.

“Sounds like you need better brothers,” I told him, my voice strong.

“You’re telling me.” It was with those words I knew he wasn’t committed to that club, and I hoped like hell that maybe one day he would see what I can now see.

A world outside of your blood and your DNA. A world where you adopt your family and you don’t have to be stuck with the one that God handed you.

“Can I see you?” he asked. I had to look away from Blizzard as I answered. I knew that he was going to argue, and do whatever he had to do before he’d let me go back to that house. But you know what, I may not have anything left to prove to these people, but I had something left to prove to myself. That I was strong, and that I was selfless enough to risk my life for someone else.

That was one thing that stood out so clearly to me during the drama with my father and Chelsea. If I had just taken the time to be selfless, I would have realized that Chelsea’s life meant more than my need to feel like I belonged. Her future on Earth meant more than me needing to be told I was loved.

Sometimes you just have to realize that people deserve to live. Everyone deserves the chance to figure out what their future may hold. But if my choices and my actions are going to stop them from getting that chance, then I desperately need to make changes.

“Yeah,” I took a deep breath. “Will the boys be home?”

“Nah, they’ve been awake for two days already. They don’t wanna hang out here.” He cleared his throat. “I’ll see you soon?”

“Half an hour,” I told him. There was a loud smash behind me and I spun to find Optimus and Wrench with their arms hooked through Blizzard’s. They were holding him back, the fire in his eyes almost melted me on the spot.

“What was that?” Edge asked in concern.

I looked down at the vase which was shattered into tiny pieces on the floor, flowers, petals, and water strewn all over. “My cat knocked something off the counter.” Tears welled in my eyes as I watched the anger radiating off Blizz.

“Okay, I’ll be here waiting.”

I ended the call and let my hands fall to my sides, my phone dropping onto the carpet.

“What the fuck do you think you’re doing?” Blizzard roared at me, breaking the silence. The boys held him back, stopping him from rushing at me.

“I’m finishing this, I’m gonna get her out.” I looked over to where Jackie stood, clutching onto Judge and tears pouring down her cheeks. “I’m going to get her out,” I repeated slowly.

“Honey, you’ve already done so much. I’m not sure we can ask you to go back there.” She sniffled and Judge pulled her closer with his arm around her shoulders.

“You don’t have to ask.”

“Rose,”
I stilled at Optimus’ harsh tone. “Now we have details, we can figure out another way to do this. You don’t have to go back in there.”

Sighing, I stepped forward and stood right in front of the man who’d been the focus of both my dreams and my nightmares for the past few months.

“I can do this,” I told him softly. “Let me do this?”

Blizzard shook off the hands of his brothers, who reluctantly let him go. “You’re gonna get yourself killed.”

“Not if you’ll have my back.” I held my breath, hoping that the time we’d shared together in my apartment wasn’t just a mirage. He stared into my eyes, and I almost fell to pieces through the silence.

“Always so fucking stubborn.”

I couldn’t help but grin as he reached for me and pulled me into the safe embrace of his arms.

“Another one bites the dust,” Slider began to sing. “Hey Rose, would you like Blizzard’s balls gift wrapped?”

“Shut up, fucker,” Blizzard growled into my hair.

I didn’t care, though, I was where I wanted to be.

From now on, no more nightmares just dreams.

Sweet dreams.