Bookish (28 page)

“I’m jealous,” I told Isaac on the morning of their wedding.

“Why on earth would you be jealous of anything?” he asked and kissed me as he adjusted his bowtie. He was the best man, and I must say he looked incredible in his tuxedo.

“Jane’s got a huge family,” I said and applied my lipstick slowly, deliberately. “It just makes me think about Auntie Abby and how much I miss her.”

“And how shitty my own family is,” he finished my thought. “I’m sorry they are, love.”

“It’s not just that,” I said and turned to face him, “I feel lost sometimes, like I forget that she’s dead. I keep thinking to myself that I forgot to tell her about our engagement. And then I remember she’s gone.”

“Would it be easier if we moved back into the house?” he asked.

“Not at all,” I said, “I was even thinking of giving it to Marta.”

“Are you sure about that?”

“I can’t go back there. Drake’s trial is next month, and if he’s convicted I can put the whole thing behind me. But if I keep living in that house, I’ll never move past it.”

“I wish I could do something to make you feel better,” he said and wrapped his arms around me.

I pressed my face against his chest and said, “You do. Every day. You love me and that’s more than enough.”

“I’m glad,” he whispered and leaned down to kiss me.

“My lipstick!” I exclaimed as his lips got closer.

“Fuck the lipstick,” he growled and kissed me anyways.

Afterwards I slashed a streak of cover across my lips and wiped lipstick off his face. We had to get dressed again, but we definitely looked better than we had before. Sex always seemed to energize the both of us, it always gave us a bright energy and shared secret grins.

The church was downtown near the water. We took a car service and were immediately swamped when we got out. I hadn’t realized how much media would be attending, hundreds of them were yelling questions and taking pictures all at the same time.

We walked the red carpet up the stairs in front of the church and I had a glimpse into what life as a celebrity must be like. We were halfway up when Marta and Sylvie joined us. Sylvie had a gorgeous young man on her arm and was eating up the attention, waving and posing for photos.

Marta looked grim, she took the football approach, hunched her shoulders and walked with a determined gait. She just wanted to get past the chaos.

“Why are there so many people here?” I asked Isaac.

“I suspect it might have something to do with the guest list,” he replied, “Ethan and Jane both travel in social circles that include a lot of actors, musicians, models, you know the type.”

“I guess I do,” I laughed and hung onto his arm.

We were almost at the top of the stairs, I clung to Isaac and Marta was pressed up against me on the other side. Sylvie and her date were just behind us. I heard my name being called from the sidelines. I was startled, turned and saw Chloe frantically waving her hands at me.

“You’ve got to be fucking kidding me,” I groaned and stopped. Isaac saw where I was looking and immediately stood straighter and stiffened up. I glanced at his face, he had a calm look but I could see his jaw twitching in anger.

“We have to get security to get rid of her,” he said, glaring in her direction.

“We can’t do a damn thing about it,” I said and sighed. “Anything we do will end up on all the gossip blogs. Let’s just keep our heads high and keep moving.”

Sylvie stuck her face over my shoulder and said, “What’s the hold up?”

“Chloe’s here,” I said and shrugged in the direction where Chloe was now trying to break through the line of guards and get to us. I shuddered when I saw the look in her eyes, she seemed obsessed. Crazy.

“Isaac!” she screamed, “I did it because I love you so much Isaac James!”

“Fuck this shit,” Sylvie said and broke away from our group. She stomped over to Chloe and slapped her in the face hard enough that I heard the smack from where we were standing.

“That’s right, get her!” Marta laughed and clapped her hands.

Sylvie stood with her hands on her hips and her feet firmly planted on the steps. “If you want a story, talk to this bitch! She’s the one who told the world about Isaac James, it was never Aubrey.”

By the time Sylvie walked back to us she had a huge grin on her face and Chloe was surrounded by a crowd of angry reporters. The world hated the person who had almost broken us up, and now her identity was public.

Chloe would be fodder for the gossip blogs now, and I couldn’t be happier.

“Thank you,” I said and laughed as the five of us walked into the church.

The ceremony was beautiful, and I cried like a baby as they said their vows. I knew it was probably just PMS but the emotions seemed to race through me and take up residence in my heart.

Maybe love did this to a person. Before I met Isaac I was a bit of a jerk when it came to romance, now everything I saw made me think of my relationship and it often ended in tears.

The reception was held a couple hours after the ceremony, we had to leave Marta and Sylvie to go take wedding photos at a nearby beachfront park.

The entire day was perfect, from Chloe being outed, to the beautiful weather on the beach, my body was filled with love and peace.

And happiness. I almost felt guilty at how happy I was, guilty that Auntie Abby wasn’t here to enjoy it with me.

I guessed that’s what being alive meant though. Growing up I’d allowed myself to become so closed off and almost relished my unhappiness as a testament to how much I missed my parents.

That’s what Auntie Abby had meant that last day we’d spent together. Finding love and happiness didn’t mean I loved my dead family any less, in fact it honored their memories by living a rich life.

Auntie Abby would smile if she saw me now, so I let myself go and I let myself laugh and love.

Isaac and I danced together and I fell in love all over again. The way he held me in front of everyone, like I was the most delicate and precious thing he’d ever had, it just solidified the feelings I had for him even more.

Made them more real.

That night in bed, I curled into the crook of his arm and simply enjoyed the moment. There was nothing else in my head but love and Isaac.

And it was perfect.

My life was perfect.

Epilogue

Life wasn’t always perfect, there were times when Isaac pissed me off by forgetting to pick up milk or leaving the toilet seat up so I hit the ice cold water with my ass at two in the morning.

But more often than not it was.

This morning it sure felt like it. We’d been together for two years and had recently purchased a larger place, still downtown and still on the water. It was a four bedroom penthouse with the most spectacular three hundred and sixty degree views I’d ever seen.

We had moved in last week and I was sitting on the toilet with a pregnancy test in my hand.

In the rush of moving and traveling with Isaac for work, I hadn’t noticed how late I’d been.

I took a deep breath, peed on the stick, finished up, washed my hands and went into the bedroom.

“Well?” Isaac asked his face lit up with joy.

“We have to wait,” I said, “It takes a couple minutes.”

“Dear god this is going to feel like hours,” he complained and I playfully punched his arm.

“It’s going to feel like years for me, you ass,” I said, “I’m the one who’s going to be carrying this baby remember.”

“I’ll be the one going out at midnight for ice cream,” he laughed.

“Yeah, yeah,” I smiled and he kissed me.

It was a passionate kiss, but tentative because of the nervous energy we both had coursing through our bodies.

We were going to be parents, I was sure of it. We’d been married last year, a private secret affair in Bali, and hadn’t been really trying, but it had happened.

Obviously we’d wanted it to happen, buying the big apartment and all.

I was nervous that our lifestyle wouldn’t suit a baby. I still ran the bookstore, but had mostly handed the reins over to Sylvie. Marta was still there a couple times a week, but she mostly did tarot readings in Auntie Abby’s house. Well, I should call it Marta’s house, I’d given it to her shortly after Jane and Ethan’s wedding. She had cleansed the energy and it felt fresh and clean.

I could even visit her now without being haunted by everything that had happened there.

Ethan and Jane were expecting again, so this baby would be perfect timing in that sense. I could go through everything with my best friend who was also experienced in all of this.

“Can we check it yet?” Isaac asked, breaking into my daydreaming.

“Yes,” I said, “Are you ready?”

“Of course,” he said and grabbed my hand. We walked together to the bathroom and I picked it up.

I turned to him with a grin, held it up and said, “Congratulations, Daddy.”

He had tears in his eyes when he picked me up and swung me around, laughing.

I had tears too, tears of joy to match his. I was breathless with laughter by the time he set me down.

“Shit, I shouldn’t do that again,” he said, “It’s not good for the baby.”

“I’m pregnant, not sick,” I told him, “I can still do pretty much everything I used to except eat sushi. Or drink wine.”

“I’ll swear off everything you can’t have,” he said and kissed me on the tip of my nose. “I love you, Aubrey. I can’t wait to tell the world.”

“I love you too,” I replied and wondered what his family would say.

***

I was heavy with my pregnancy and crankier than I thought humanly possible. Of course I would have to get knocked up just in time to enjoy the hottest summer on record. I didn’t know if it was the heat or the humidity or my swollen ankles that would kill me, but I was positive it was one of them.

I was lying on our deck overlooking the ocean, wearing a loose white shift and no shoes, when the doorbell rang.

“You have got to be fucking kidding me,” I grumbled. Isaac was home, so I let him get it. It must be the baby monitor I’d ordered, but usually the doorman would take parcels for us. I’d have to remind him that I was a bloated, angry pregnant woman who didn’t want to be disturbed the next time I saw him.

A cool breeze swept over me and I closed my eyes to enjoy the day. It wasn’t that big of a deal, I probably wouldn’t say a thing. My crankiness was simply hormonal and discomfort. I didn’t need to punish anyone else for it.

I heard Isaac talking in the apartment and realized there were a few voices. I opened my eyes and struggled to get up off the chaise lounge. I managed to get sitting up when Isaac came onto the deck.

“Aubrey, love,” he said with a huge smile, “I’d like you to meet my family.”

“Family?” I said, not comprehending what he was saying.

People flooded out from behind him, Madeline was in the lead with a grin. “You don’t have to introduce me,” she said, “I know Aubrey.”

She was right, she’d been at our wedding and a huge support since Isaac had been cut off.

I didn’t recognize the rest of them, although I saw bits of Madeline in the elegant older couple standing awkwardly a few feet away. I recognized Isaac’s siblings, spouses and their children from photos on Madeline’s Facebook account.

It was his entire family.

I didn’t know what to say. Part of me wanted to rage at them for putting him through hell all this time, but part of me was elated that they’d come through for us and our child.

“I would like to be the first to apologize,” Isaac’s dad said and took a step towards me. “We are stubborn in our family, and sometimes it gets in the way of us being decent human beings.”

“I’m sorry,” Isaac’s mom said, “Please forgive us.”

Isaac came to my side, put his arm around me and said, “It’s up to Aubrey. She’s the one who was hurt the most by your actions.”

I sighed, stood up with Isaac’s help and looked at them all, standing there expectantly, waiting for my response.

I felt our baby kick, and I felt another cool breeze wash over me. I looked up at Isaac, took his hand and squeezed it.

“Of course I forgive you” I said with a smile, “I’m so pleased you were able to come see us.”

With that, the tension was gone. I was surrounded by family and love, talking and laughter. They felt my belly and asked about the baby. We showed them ultrasound pics and we chose a restaurant for dinner.

In short, it was a typical day with the family, and it was exactly what Isaac and I had been needing to make our lives complete.

In case you were wondering, Abby Olive James was born almost exactly a month after that. Named for my late Auntie, she was big and healthy and has filled our world with more love than either of us knew existed.

Isaac had proven that it was possible to fall in love with somebody at first sight, and our daughter proved to both of us that it was possible to do it over and over again.

I would never tire of falling in love with Isaac James.

The end.