Breaking Bedlam (Beautiful Bedlam Book 2) (22 page)

“Why? Do you often run in to crazy crying girls with blood pouring down their noses?” she remarked wryly.

“Only every Monday.” He smirked causing Sienna’s heart to do that flipping motion again. “So what really happened?” he asked curiously.

“I’m not exactly sure to be honest. I’ve never really had a nosebleed before.” She admitt
ed.

“
Oh, you’re still running with that story?” he asked rhetorically as if he didn’t believe her. “It’s the truth. I know what you’re thinking and no, no one hurt me. I can take care of myself.” She stated confidently.

“Yes, I saw Miss Simmons. I have to say I was very surprised when I found out you were the one who broke her nose.” He remarked and struggled with great difficulty not to grin.

“Let me guess? You’re severely disappointed and appalled by my disgusting juvenile behavior?” Sienna sighed.

“Oh, on the contrary. I think it’s refreshing seeing you stand up for yourself
for once, besides I’m sure Bethany will just get herself a new nose anyway but you didn’t hear it from me.” He chuckled causing Sienna to giggle along with him. He had an infectious laugh. He was one of those rare people who could light up a room just with a smile. Sienna’s smile stilled as she felt his fingertips lightly graze her plump lower lip as he wiped the blood away. The look they shared was prolonged and intense causing both of their hearts to race.

His eyes lingered upon hers for just a moment as if contemplating a much-desired kiss but he withdrew away from her suddenly and put the wipes in the trashcan. Sienna shifted uncomfortably in her seat and tucked her hair behind her ears. Blake mentally kicked himself. What was he doing? She was just a child? Not even an adult yet. She was vulnerable and ill. He was her teacher, her guide, and her mentor. He couldn’t, he wouldn’t abuse his authority. It was just wrong. He dragged a stool nearby and moved it a safe distance away and sat facing her. On the surface Sienna appeared calm and composed, on the inside however was completely another matter entirely. Her heart sped up at the thought of what could have easily just have happened. She knew you weren’t supposed to feel this way about your teachers, but then again most teenage girls’ chemistry teachers looked more like Walter White than the blue-eyed Adonis that was William Blake.

“Blake, that night at the cemetery… you told me you were visiting your wife?” Sienna asked quietly and fidgeted with her fingers nervously. Blake ran his fingers through his tousled dark hair and looked at her apprehensively.

“It’s none of my business.” Sienna apologized shaking her head. She had clearly crossed some invisible line. It was his dead wife for goodness sake. Of course he didn’t want to talk about it let alone to an unhinged student who was clearly smitten by him.

“Her name was Charlotte.” He said somberly staring in to Sienna intensely giving her the feeling that he rarely spoke about his wife.

“We met at Stanford. Charlotte was the one that actually
grew up in Haven Falls. I grew up in London but got a scholarship to Stanford at age fifteen. She was a couple of years older. Taught me everything I knew. I was pretty damn terrified of her at first. She was strong, courageous, so extroverted, the polar opposite of me. We actually got married pretty young. Our parents were furious. We were the odd couple in college already married by eighteen. Everybody thought we wouldn’t last five minutes but we were
so
determined to make it last. We weren’t going to be like our parents. We would last forever.” He smiled sadly as if recalling fond memories.

“Of course forever ended up being only two years due to her untimely passing.” He added cynically as he stared out through the window looking at the beautiful sunset. The question as to how she passed away burned up inside Sienna but she squelched her growing curiosity. This was clearly a sensitive topic. She couldn’t help but feel her heart throb for him. She understood his pain and a part of her realized it was easier for Blake to confide in her because he knew she actually understood.

“Well, you did last forever, well as forever as this world can guarantee you. You were together til death did her part. You loved her til her death. That’s more than a lot of people can say about their wives and partners.” She whispered her voice shaking with emotion. She could see the tears in his eyes that he immediately blinked away.

“God, this is like therapy.” He joked and breathed out a shaky laugh. She smiled back at him radiantly, with her glowing skin and big sad endearing eyes. He looked at the amazing creature that had somehow snuck her way in to his heart and managed to get him to open up about the darkest parts of his life whilst so many others had tried countless times and failed.

“That’s me, Oprah Winfrey minus the likeability factor and the billions.” She retorted wryly. “People like you.” He replied instantly with so much surety in his voice it threw her. “What?” she yelped. “Just because you’re not popular it doesn’t mean you’re not liked.” He said with an arched eyebrow and smirked as if he knew something she d
idn’t.

“With all due respect Blake, but that is the stupidest thing I have ever heard.” She scoffed refuting his claim.

“I think you’d be surprised by the number of people who genuinely dislike the so called ‘popular’ kids at this school and in any school in America. I mean I’ve never seen so many people so thrilled to see a certain someone sporting a broken nose.” He smiled secretly proud of her.

“So you’re saying because I punched Bethany Simmons this morning my likeability factor is suddenly hitting the roof?” she asked and bit her bottom lip unable to contain her smile.

“
That’s ridiculous.” She scoffed and shook her head slowly.

“No, you’re not liked because of the fighting although I must admit that did help. If you could have seen the way everybody was looking at you today after your speech. I’ve never seen
two
hundred
rowdy teenagers stunned so silent, sitting so quietly and being so enraptured by someone before.” He said earnestly. His deep blue eyes sparkled and reminded her of sunlight reflecting off the ocean waves.

“They were all just paying attention because they’re curious to see what the nutcase will do and say next. I’m just sick entertainment for them.” She remarked the truth lay heavy on her heart bringing her mood down.

“That’s not true.” He whispered adamantly and reached out to take her hand surprising the both of them.

“I
wish
you had stayed at least ten seconds longer at the pep rally today. If you had, you would have heard the things people said about you.
Nice
things.” He said and stood closer to her. He needed her to believe him. He needed her to see how special she was.

“I don’t need their pity, and I don’t want it! I didn’t speak out today because I wanted sympathy. I didn’t speak and bare my soul to half the town just because Principal Sharpe said so. I only said the things I said to send a message to someone.” She sniffed and snatched her hand out of his annoyed that this was what everyone must have thought. Her annoyance only grew she felt her emotions betray her as the tears flew down her cheeks. She wiped at her eyes exasperatedly yet the rain continued to pour from that pair of distraught green skies. She ran her fingers through her hair angrily and clenched the hair at the top of her head tightly trying to relieve some of the emotional pain she felt inside, trying to gain some control over her life.

“Sienna, Sienna, stop! Stop!”
Blake yelled and held her wrists tightly in his hands. She let her head fall against his hard muscled chest in defeat. She felt so emotionally drained. No amount of medication would ever take away the sadness Sienna felt. There was no magic pill she could take, no special prayer she could read, no wish upon a shooting star that could ever alleviate the pain she was enduring. Blake wrapped his arms around her fragile trembling body.

“You need to cry. You need to let it out. Take it from me, bottling it up will only prolong the pain.” He said softly as he stroked her silky dark locks affectionately soothing her down.

“I’m sick and tired of crying. All I do is cry. My heart and eyes are
sore
yet I still cry and cry and cry. I
hate
crying. I
hate
feeling like this. I
hate
crying at night and then crying again in the morning because I’ve woken up, because I didn’t just stay asleep forever. I hate feeling so helpless, so sad all the time, so
weak
.” She sobbed and gasped, soaking the front of his shirt with her tears. 

“You’re
not
weak.” He whispered obstinately.

“
I am
.”  She cried and held on to Blake as if he were the only thing in the world that was still holding him up. At that moment in time he truly was. Sienna was alone. She wondered how it was humanly possible to be so alone. Everything and everyone in the world seemed to come in pairs, even the animals in Noah’s ark came two by two. She was destined to be alone and to lose all those close to her. People always left in the end, either by choice or by cruel fate. In the end Sienna was left with nothing but gaping hole in her battered heart and her eyes bleeding with the tears of her shattered soul.

“Look at me. You do not get to feel sorry for yourself. Look at me. You are the strongest person I’ve ever met.” He said holding her angelic face gently in his hands and gazed in those alluring emerald eyes.

“Then I’m sorry that you’ve been subjected to such a low class of people in your life.” She replied with a broken smile.

“You forget that I was the one who pulled you out of the ground that day. You forget that I’ve seen you at your worst. I’ve seen nothing but unimaginable pain and strength from you. You wonder why ordinary people don’t understand you? It’s because you’re not ordinary. You’re not normal. You’re different and that’s not always a bad thing. Sometimes it can be an amazing thing.”

“I don’t want to be different. I don’t to stand out.” She replied sadly and removed his hands away from her. She didn’t deserve his warmth, kindness and compassion. She didn’t even know what to do with it all. The last time a person of any kind had shown her affection like this he had turned her world upside down and crushed her. She couldn’t let herself get so close to someone again. She walked away from him and picked up her backpack.

“You have to let it go.” He said as her back was turned to leave.

“What?” she asked and turned to face him.

“You have to let go of all the anger and the hate. It will eat away at you until you’re left with nothing but bitterness and I’d hate to see that happen to someone so sweet.” He spoke softly the words penetrated in to her heart and sent her stomach in to a twist.

“I don’t hate anyone.” She responded choosing to ignore the obvious compliment. He merely looked at her knowingly with those remarkable piercing blue eyes of his. She understood what he meant. She had to stop hating herself. He was just too polite to voice her thoughts.

“You’re wrong you know, not everyone likes me.” She said remembering the girls in the bathroom. Blake was nice and caring but he was also a teacher. He didn’t see the whole picture of what was really going on within the high school.

“Even those who hate you can’t help but secretly admire you.” He said honestly. He was constantly defending her from herself. He just wouldn’t give up on her.

“Well answer me this, if I’m as liked as you claim then why is my only friend my chemistry teacher?” she asked sardonically with a raised brow.

“We both know we’re not friends.” He replied as he leaned against the table. They weren’t. They both knew they were something a lot more. She couldn’t help but blush and glance away momentarily. She felt hot all of a sudden under the warmth of his loving gaze. “We’re each other’s shrinks?” she joked easing the tension between them. “Exactly.” He whispered. “I should get to Principal Sharpe’s office.” She said quickly. “Well, I guess I’ll see you tomorrow Miss Rivers.” He said with a half smile and she could have sworn his blue eyes even twinkled at that same moment. She blinked and it was gone. She reminded herself to take her medication when she got home.

“Tomorrow, Mr. Blake.” She nodded and got the hell out of that lab as quick as she could without actually looking like she was physically running from him. She breathed a sigh of relief as she got out in to the fresh air. She hadn’t realized that she had been holding her breath for so long. She waited for her heart rate to slow down to a healthy rhythm before she walked back in to the high school, and towards principal Sharpe’s dreaded office to find out where she was having her detention.