Breaking Even (17 page)

Read Breaking Even Online

Authors: Lily Bishop

The waterfall wasn’t big—only about twenty
feet—but it made a nice sound as it hit the pond below.

“Where does all that water come from, out
here in the middle of nowhere?”

“There’s a steep hill here. The water
gathers and then drops off this rocky outcrop,” Ric explained.

“I just love it.”

He turned and caught her eye. Lindsey
thought he was going to say something, but then he didn’t. He swung off his
horse and tethered the reins to a low-hanging branch nearby.

Lindsey didn't know how she would
dismount. She looked at the distance she was from the ground, then at her feet.
She didn't think she could do it without a stool, but then Ric took her by the
waist and helped her swing her leg over. He acted as if she weighed nothing at
all.

After she dismounted, Lindsey turned and
saw the picnic table with a woven basket and two coolers. The rustic table made
of carved redwood blended into the area near the waterfall. The round table
included two attached round bench seats.

“How did this all get here?”

“Stan and his wife arranged it for me.
What do you think?”

Lindsey leaned up and kissed Ric, barely
touching her lips to his. “You’re amazing.”

He squeezed her in a quick hug. “What can
I say? You inspire me. Let’s see what goodies they gave us.”

In the basket, Lindsey found a tablecloth
and she spread it out over the table. She also found two cushions, which she
added to the bench seats. Stan’s wife Stella had provided real china and
cutlery.

Lindsey set the table, impressed by
everything Stella had sent. A silver salt and peppershaker. Oversized silver
spoons and a serrated knife. As she set out the dishes, warning bells clanged
in her head like an old-fashioned fire station. Why would he set all this up in
a secluded location?

What if Ric proposed? She knew that was
what he wanted, and she would have to tell him no. Oh, God, how could she tell
him no? What would she do?

Her hands shook as she lined up the forks
and folded cloth napkins over the plates.

“So, what do we have?” she asked, her
voice masking the fear she felt.

“It looks like fried chicken and a
selection of salads.”

He lined up the plastic bowls in the center
of the table, each a different color and added spoons to each one. She found
potato salad, pasta salad, fruit, potato chips and sour cream dip.

“Wow. This is a picnic.”

“Can’t have my girl going hungry.”

Lindsey sat down and began fixing them
both plates. “Is that what I am, Ric? Your girl?”

He glanced up and smiled. “You’re so much
more than that, but we have to start somewhere.”

“True.” She took a bite of corkscrew
pasta. “Mmmm. This is good. I don’t even like cold pasta, but this one actually
has flavor.”

Ric pulled apart a roll and made a
sandwich with roasted chicken. Lindsey nibbled on a piece of cheese. She took a
fat purple grape and reached toward him. He leaned forward, and she traced the
grape around his lips before she popped it in.

“I’ve never met a man like you,” she said.
“Every other man wants something from me. You’re content to let me just be.”

“Content is overstating,” he said, his
lips quirking. “But I understand you need time.” He fed her a piece of cheese
and another bite of honeydew. She took his finger in her mouth and sucked. He
drew in a deep breath, shuddering just a little as he let it out.

That hung in the air, just a little bit
awkward. “So what made you decide on a picnic?”

“I wanted you to get a feel for the
property, and you’ve been so busy finishing the semester, you needed a break.”

“That’s the truth. I definitely need a
break.”

“Speaking of breaks, have you decided what
you’re going to do for Christmas? I still want you to come down to Calliope.”

Lindsey continued filling her plate, but
she didn’t look up. Not just yet. She didn’t know what to say.

She realized that Ric was waiting for her
answer, so she had to say something. “I don’t know yet. I usually spend the
holidays with Laura. She and Fox will probably be having Christmas at their
house in Atlanta. If it weren’t for that, I’d love to come to Calliope.”

“Well, let me know. If you can’t, maybe I
can come up after Christmas, and we can spend some time together.”

“I’d like that too,” Lindsey echoed. She thought
he wanted to say something else, but he didn’t.

“Can you really see yourself here? Giving
up the island? You’ve been part of an island all your life. Not a lot of ocean
up here.”

Ric shrugged. “There are many issues I
have to consider, but I’m ready to expand beyond the island. Of course, Buck
says he wants to sell, but he may not be ready. It’s still early.”

“What exactly do you want to do with the
horse farm? Stan talked about an expansion?”

“We're still running the numbers. I’ve
considered a riding school, to supplement the reiners, and I might breed
quarterhorses. There’s a good bit of recreational horseback riding in this
area, and good trails. That, combined with a fencing academy, should keep the
pace in the black.”

He had thought everything out. Love rushed
inside of her. Ric was considering her feelings and actually thinking about
moving off the island.

They finished the picnic with a couple of
slices of cake and then mounted the horses to go back. They stored everything in
the cooler, where someone would collect it later.

Lindsey couldn’t remember when she had had
so much fun. At one point, she had thought Ric would propose, but he had
stopped short of that each time. At first she had wondered how she would tell
him no. Now she was second-guessing that decision, and found herself wishing he
had asked.

 
CHAPTER
SEVENTEEN
Dinner and Then Some

 

As they cleared
the table from dinner, Ric lifted the almost empty bottle of wine.

"There's not enough to save," he
explained. "Do you want a bit more?"

“Sure, I’ll take another glass. I don’t
have anywhere to be.”

In her note, the housekeeper had said that
to leave the dishes for her, so Lindsey retreated to the den. She stretched
like a cat before she sat down on the sofa.

Ric brought her the refilled glass and sat
down beside her. This might be her favorite wine of all the ones he had given
her. He had said it was a shiraz from Australia. She had smelled a distinct
bouquet of blackberry. He told her he could also pick out currant and pepper.
Lindsey only smelled blackberry. And wine.

Ric had turned off most of the lights. The
lamp in the foyer gave the den enough light that they wouldn’t trip over each
other. Lindsey wanted to sit closer, wanted to initiate contact, but she didn’t
know how. After he had told her no the night before, she didn’t need that
debate again.

“Why do I feel really awkward?” she said
after a minute.

“No need.” He lifted her across his lap as
if she weighed nothing. With her back against the arm of the couch, she could
still reach her wine and she could still see his face.

His hand on her hip kept her balanced. She
relished the heat that he generated. She took another sip of wine and then set
it down.

“You keep getting me to try new stuff.
Don’t be surprised if I get addicted.”

“You’re talking about the wine, right?” he
asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Yes, the wine,” she lied, grabbing him by
the back of his neck and pulling him toward her. She couldn’t get enough of his
scent. She craved the taste of him.

She loved the strength in him, knowing he
was holding her. His arms felt solid around her, as if he would never let her
go. She so needed this. She so needed him.

“There’s something I forgot to tell you
last night.” She leaned over to pepper his neck with kisses.

“What’s that?” His voice sounded tight, as
if he were barely holding it together.

“I went on birth control last month.”

“You went on birth control,” he echoed.
She could almost feel the control humming in his muscles.

“Yes, sir. Sure did.” She slipped her hand
between them and rubbed the hard ridge she found in his pants. “I got the
implant. It should give me a few years without worrying about taking a pill
every day or getting pregnant.”

He groaned. “You are making it difficult
for me to respect your innocence—”

“I don’t want you to respect it. I want
you to take it.”

She would have scrambled off him, but he
held her still.

“Not yet. No rush.”

“I want everything. Full speed ahead,” she
answered, grinding into him.

He chuckled, a warm sound that stoked her
fires even further. “I promise. Everything. And more.”

She wanted to argue her point, but he
kissed her again and she forgot why she wanted to rush him. When he squeezed
and kneaded her breasts, her nipples tightened in response.

How did she not know that he could make
her gasp out of need for him? She threw her head back, just to get a breath,
and he surged to her neck, finding a pressure point just below her ears. When
he kissed her there and tickled with his tongue, her nervous system sang with
joy. Tingles rushed through her until she thought they would burst through her
skin.

“I keep dreaming about you and I wake up
on fire,” she told him.

“I haven’t slept through a night in six
months for dreaming of you.”

 

#

 

What had he done
to deserve such a woman? Ric eased her off him and stood, and then he lifted
her in his arms. He kept kissing her
—she tasted wonderful, of wine and summer
in the dead of winter.

He was torn—he wanted her more than he had
ever wanted any woman before, but he didn’t want her to regret anything. He
sensed last night that he had hurt her feelings, but her first time shouldn't
be rushed. At the waterfall, he had almost asked her to marry him, but instinct
told him she wouldn’t say yes. Not yet. His father had always told him not to
ask that question unless he knew the answer. He always said a man and a woman
couldn’t recover if she said no.

He laid her on the bed and pulled back the
cover. He nudged his boots off with his feet and took the time to unzip her
brown leather boots and slide them off.

He wished he had brought more wine into
the bedroom. He needed to slow things down and quickly, or he would be too much
for her. He stretched out beside her and pulled her into his arms so they were
both on their sides facing each other.

“You are amazing,” he whispered. His hand
slipped beneath her shirt so he could rub her back. She wore a crisp
button-down shirt with a tank top beneath it. He didn’t feel a bra strap. He
reached around the front and found one of her pert little nipples. It was
already on high alert, but it tightened even more under is fingers.

He had to see them. He let her lay back
and unbuttoned her shirt until only a thin camisole lay between him and his
goal. Her hands followed his, trying to help but getting in the way.

He took her hands and pulled them above
her head until they touched the iron headboard.

“Hold your hands up here, out of the way.
I’ve got this,” he added, when she looked like she would protest.

The shirt finally open, he pushed the
camisole up until it framed her tits like a curtain. Beautiful, dusty pink
nipples stared at him, daring him to give them attention. He tweaked one with
his fingers while he leaned in and circled the other with his tongue. She
gasped at the twin assault, and he took that as a sign to keep going.

“You like that, baby?” he asked, cooing to
her.

“Yes,” she ground out, and he felt her
hands on the back of his head.

“No, ma’am, put your hands back or I stop.”

She whimpered, but did as he asked. He was
so turned on, if her hands roamed where she wanted, he’d embarrass himself on
the sheets.

“These are perfect for me,” he whispered.

“They’re too small.”

“No ma’am, perfect. I’ve got just the
amount I want. Right here.”

 

#

 

How could he just
stop? Ric had been giving her breasts attention and then stood up abruptly. She
was about to protest until she realized he was pulling off his jeans. His shirt
and undershirt came next until all he wore was the boxer briefs. Her eyes
widened when she saw the way his erection jutted out.

“I worried you were quitting,” she said when
he lay back down.

“Those pants were doing some serious
damage. Your fault,” he added.

“I can tell.” She touched him through his
underwear and felt him jump to greet her.

“And that’s why I kept my pants on so
long.”

“What? I can’t touch you?”

“Not if I’m going to keep my sanity and
make this good for you. We need to go slow, make sure you’re ready.”

“Every fiber of my being tells me to
hurry…”

“I know, but you have to fight that urge.
There will be time for rough and ready sex after your body is used to the idea.
If we do that now, it could hurt you even more than you’re ready for.”

He slid up on the bed and kissed her, one
hand rubbing her breast, his elbow taking most of his weight. She could relax
without having to stretch toward him, and she let herself enjoy his touch.

At that thought, she smiled beneath his
kiss. The nervousness she had felt earlier had faded.

The hand that was on her nipple slipped
lower and of its own volition her hand moved to block. He stopped at her
stomach and soothed her. “It’s just me,” he said. “You know I won’t hurt you.”

She nodded against him, squeezing her eyes
tight. She had been feeling so good. Now the coldness was back, the freeze that
had shut her down every single time.

“Deep breath, sweetie. Deep breath. I’ve
got you.”

She kept her eyes closed and breathed deep
as he spoke. He unbuttoned her jeans and pulled them past her hips. She
expected him to slide her panties down at the same time, but he left them in
place.

His hand skimmed her stomach. She sucked
in a breath fast, but he danced around her navel and then returned to her
breast. When he started nibbling and sucking, Lindsey lost herself in the
moment as the cold fear receded.

“You still with me, Princess?” he asked.

“Yes, I’m here—”

“Don’t overthink it. If you want me to
stop, all you have to do is tell me. I’ll go take a cold shower.”

“Oh, God, I don’t want you to stop,” she
said, then squealed when he brushed her nipple with his teeth. He swallowed her
squeal with a kiss.

This time when his hand slipped down, her
hand didn't chase him. He went under her panties and cupped her mound. She
arched into him, not even realizing what she was doing.

“That’s it baby,” he cooed, sliding her
panties down. She felt him take off his boxers, and she cupped his ass with her
hands, squeezing. He murmured his pleasure, leaning into her. His cock rubbed
against her, arousing her even more. “You like that?” he asked when he dry
humped her, letting her feel the rhythm without penetration.

“I need more,” she whispered, breathing through
the need. She knew now what it felt like, that determination to have him inside
her. It went beyond anything she had felt before. She needed to have him.

He rolled off her until there was a little
bit of space and kissed her again. She felt his finger sliding down her mound,
rubbing her in circles that got smaller with each turn. She wanted to slide his
finger exactly where she needed it, but he might think she wanted him to stop.
So she waited.

She stretched up and pushed onto his
finger, gasping when he added a second finger and plunged inside. She was
wetter than she ever remembered being, slippery wet as he slid in and out. She
felt full, but thought she could take more. She needed more. He plunged in and
out with his fingers, readying her for him.

She looked up, and in the dark room, lit
only by the nightlight in the bathroom, she saw the love in his expression.

“Make me yours, Ric. Only yours.”

She felt him at her entrance, probing,
readying himself. He was big. Much bigger than his two fingers. He eased in.
Lindsey held still, surprised by the burning sensation. She squeezed her eyes
shut, trying to breathe past it.

“You okay?”

She nodded. “Just do it.”

He moved slowly, letting her get
accustomed to his size. The burning eased. She shifted a little bit and felt
him push in more.

“Better?”

“Better.”

Using a vibrator a few times couldn’t
compare to the sense of fullness she felt now. The sense of being invaded by
another. She gloried in his power and knew that he would use every bit of it to
protect her. He reached between them and rubbed her clit, circling it with his
finger. She felt herself open up even more. This was nothing like the violence
she had experienced before. This was something completely different, something
magical.

“You’re so tight,” he whispered. He moved
again, and this time, the pain receded quickly. She could tell he was holding
back.

“I want all of you,” she whispered.

“Are you sure?”

“Yes, all of you.”

She closed her eyes and gripped his back.
She gasped as he plunged all the way in. Her eyes watered and she couldn’t get
her breath.

“Breathe,” he whispered. “The pain will
fade.” He held still and waited. She felt the tension in his arms, felt the
control he enforced to go slow for her. She moved her hips, just a little, and
the movement helped.

“That’s better,” she whispered.

He started with slow thrusts, introducing
her body to the foreign movements. She felt like she was learning a new dance.

She didn’t know when the burning stopped
and the flushing started. She felt like her entire body was on fire. He reached
between them again, circling her clit. She bucked up, meeting his thrust. He
pressed harder with his fingers, and she felt the fire rush up in waves and
then dissipate just as quickly. She panted at the sensation, not sure what
happened. When he froze above her, she felt him finish inside of her.

When he rolled off her, he carried her
with him so that she was partially on top of him. “Are you okay?” he asked. “I
hope the pain wasn’t too much. It shouldn’t hurt again.”

“I’m okay,” she said, but she couldn’t
hold back a sob. She wasn’t upset, but she felt tightly wound.

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