Breathless - Jesse Book 1 (18 page)

“Jesse, I don’t want you to go. I don’t give a damn about the fights. I need you here. Don’t go.”

“Why should I stay? You don’t even see how much I’ve changed for you. I fought for you; I stood up for you, Niki”

“The violence scares me. I don’t want a man to control me. I want a man to work with me. You know I’ve been dominated my whole life. But I do believe that you care for me and you mean everything to me. You came into my life and filled a huge hole in my heart. Ever since my mother died, I have had a hard time feeling anything, until I met you. I don’t know how it happened, but I feel connected to you and if you leave, I don’t know how I can go on and...and....”

I talked fast and rambled in an attempt to say everything I wanted. The more I spoke, the more his features softened. He cupped my face in his hands and looked deep into my eyes. It rendered me breathless. His eyes flicked up and down from my lips to my eyes and back again.

Before I could catch my breath, he claimed my mouth with his, tears welled up behind my closed eyelids. He pulled back enough to let me feel his breath on my lips. “I’ll stay, Niki.” He whispered. “I’ll stay for us.”

Tears spilling, and my chest rising and falling from my irregular breathing, I choked out the words, “Thank you, Jesse. That’s all I want. Just give us a chance.”

He crushed my mouth again, swirling his tongue, pushing his hands first up into my hair and then running them down my back, pressing me up against his warm muscular body. Granting fate to follow its path, I leaned into his embrace and met his kisses with un-abandoned submission, my mind whirled, all thoughts lost to the moment. In that one simple movement, that one willing gesture, all of his wishes and future wishes were affirmed. He knew I was his and he was mine. He pulled back from our kiss, and dipped his head to touch my forehead, still holding me in the crook of his elbow, his arms wrapped around me so tight, while I trembled.

“I will, Niki.. You are my sweet angel, so beautiful and good. I never had much faith in love, or miracles, never wanted to put my heart on the line, until I met you, and everything changed. I don’t want to imagine a life without you, so now I’ll say goodbye to the old me, it’s already gone. You are everything I’ve been looking for. Every kiss and every touch feels new, yet so familiar. When I look at you I see the other half of me, my reflection, like a mirror.” Tears rolled freely down my face as I blinked up into his eyes.

Jesse loosened his vice grip and put enough space between us for him to bring his hands to my face. He wiped away my tears with his thumbs; his burning gaze never left mine.

“I need you with me.” Goose bumps raised on my skin, as he caressed me. Before I could catch my breath, he ran his hands down my arms and took my hands. He pulled on them, as he walked backwards, driving me towards his bedroom, our eyes never unlocked. With the weight of his body, he pressed my back against the hallway wall, as the solid pack of his chest muscles firmly compacted my breasts. It ignited a torrent of heat that ricocheted up and down the entire length of my body. I felt the hardness of his erection against my thin tank top and sweat shorts. My nipples budded up in immediate response. He interlaced his fingers in mine, palm to palm and pushed my hands over my head. I was pinned to the wall. My arms went up, my chest arched out and my head tilted back, reflexively. He held my petite hands tightly. I released a soft whimper and my lips obediently parted for him. He claimed my mouth hungrily, as if he were a man starved of every basic human need, darting his velvet tongue in and out of my mouth, and sucking my lower lip as he pulled away slowly. Heat pulsed in my stomach. He pushed with his knee and coaxed my legs apart. A long hot tingle raged between my legs.

Jesse trailed hot kisses down my neck, his free hand ran up the inside of my thigh, all the way to where it pushed the crescent of my breast into his kisses. I rolled my head to the side and looked down, tantalized by the sight of his mouth working my breast. I watched, as the tattoo on his bicep danced to the tune of his tugs, pushes and squeezes, until the pink of my nipple rewarded his tongue. I groaned a deeply salacious moan and whispered Jesse’s name into the late afternoon shadows of the hallway.

The loose soft cotton fabric of my sweat shorts moved compliantly as his hand slid down inside my panties. He crushed his lips to mine as he slid his fingers easily between my separated, wet folds, ratcheting up the delicious tingle that he had already activated in me. He kissed and fondled me, his tongue and fingers moved in synchronicity, in and out, swirling, pushing, and stroking two frenzied erogenous zones at once. My mind screamed, overwhelmed with pulsing sensations that assaulted my ragged nerves. My breath caught, as he pushed his fingers inside of me and every last coherent thought spilled out of my brain. He pulled his fingers out of me, and pulled back, his breath ragged with desire. He pinned me with a gaze from his burning blue eyes. He looked at me from beneath those long unruly locks and anointed himself with my wetness, like holy water.

In a hormone infused fog, we stumbled, the rest of the way into his bedroom, pawing and tearing at unwanted clothing. Jesse kicked the door shut with his foot, his hands slipped up under my flimsy tank top and pulled it off over my head in one swift sweep. The shock of having me alone, nearly naked, for his pleasure, registered like a ten on the Richter scale. He paused for a moment, stunned as if in disbelief, drinking in my body, roaming and caressing every curve with his eyes. I slowly slipped my bra straps off, first one shoulder and then the other. I pulled my arms out, one at a time, with my arm across my chest. I held the cups of the bra to my breasts with splayed fingers, pushing and squeezing for his viewing, teasing his adrenaline level to the max. I looked down at my breast, pushed them up hard to overflow the cups and lifted my eyes to catch his reaction. It was magnificent. His eyes were so hungry, the expression on his face like an open book. He wanted me badly, as much as I wanted him.

As if suddenly released from a frozen time warp, he blinked and ripped off his T-shirt over his head and let it fall to the floor. He exhaled a slow breath. My eyes flickered and widened, his muscles rippled under his tan skin. I raked my teeth over my lower lip. My eyes trailed down to the bulge in his jeans. I closed my eyes and swallowed hard. He pushed his hand through his hair, pulling my attention back to his inked bicep and slowly unraveled any last ounce of resistance I had left in my body. I wanted him to fuck me. I wanted it so badly, more than anything I’d ever wanted in my life.

I threw off my bra and wiggled out of my shorts leaving on my hot, pink, lace panties for further tease appeal. He leaned forward like he was about to reach for me, but I planted my palms flat against his chest, in a signal to wait. The warmth of his skin permeated my palms and my fingers splayed with anticipation across his tight pecs. They jittered, then stilled. I looked into his eyes. I lightly trailed my fingers down his chest, his abdomen and stopped my tactile exploration at his belt buckle, as I lowered myself to my knees.

Jesse’s jeans came off, boxers and all and his hard cock sprang free, a magnificent piece of artwork of the male body. I circled my hand around it and stroked his flesh, while cupping his balls. He hissed and tossed his head back. I wrapped my warm wet lips around his engorged manhood and sucked. I squeezed his balls, sucking and stroking. He put his hand gently on my shoulders. He grabbed my hair and tousled his hands in it, guided it and moaned with delight. He gently pushed my head back to release his cock and smiled at me. “Ladies come first.” He lifted me by my arms and guided me to the bed.

Laying me gently down on its softness, Jesse kissed my stomach right above my panties, then enjoyed the tease, as he pulled them down over the curves of my hips. All of my nakedness was in his total view and I could hear his excited breathing.

For a very long time, his warm hands moved along my thighs, tracing up and down, and each time he strayed towards my wetness, I moaned louder and louder. I couldn’t help it, I had wanted him to touch me like this since that first night on the beach. He sucked my nipples using his other hand to guide each one, budded with pinkness into his mouth and gave equal attention to both.

Jesse’s mouth slid down my rib cage, down my stomach and to my mound. I gasped flushed with anticipation. Using his fingers he parted my folds and flicked his tongue on my pulsing clit. I bucked against his mouth wanting more.

He licked and fingered me, building the intensity. I tensed and he fucked me with his fingers, as my orgasm took reign over my body, building, climbing, and accelerating, nearly to the exploding point. I looked down and the second I saw his head moving between my legs, pleasuring me so erotically, I wailed and my orgasm came with a sharp edge to it, crashing and shattering me to pieces.

Jesse rose up to his knees, stroking his cock, priming it for action. I saw in him an intensity so great, a desire so wild that I thought I couldn’t take any more. He leaned over to the bed stand and ripped open a small foil packet. A moment later, he slid into me, filling me and delicious tingles of pleasure rocketed through my entire body. He groaned, and panted with the satisfaction of finding his destiny. His rhythm picked up, with each thrust and I moaned louder and louder, my body bucking and writhing in response. I pulled my legs up, bending my knees to offer him the deepest penetration. I longed to please him completely. I felt the pull again. I couldn’t believe it. He was making me come a second time, I was transported, I was out of my mind, out of my body with sexual pleasure.

Repeatedly screaming out his name and God’s, in gasping breaths, I dug my fingers into his flesh, frantically I positioned him where I needed for the second orgasm. The wave of tension rose, then broke, and I was taken with such ferocity that it resembled convulsions. He growled and released deep inside of me, shaking and trembling, as his hot breath fell in steamy puffs on my neck. Collapsing onto me, he exhaled a final long audible breath and rolled to the side, waiting for our breathing to regulate.

Jesse leaned over, stroked my hair and looked into my eyes. “Baby, that was amazing.
You
are amazing, everything I’ve ever wanted.”

I tried to swallow the heavy knot in my throat. Uncontrollable tears threatened my eyes.

“Hey, now. What’s this?” he asked. His voice turned soft, as he leaned up on his elbow and touched the tears now springing from my eyes. “No crying allowed when you’re in Jesse’s arms.” He kissed my cheek and brushed away the wetness with his thumb.

I gave a short laugh. I felt ridiculous for being so emotional. “Don’t worry, they are tears of joy. That was so intense just now. You shook me to my core. I don’t usually trust someone, well guys that is, so easily. But with you Jesse, I feel safe, like I can trust you with my heart. You’ve opened up something in me that has been closed for a long time and it hit me really hard right now. That’s why the tears.” I smiled and looked up into his eyes with a long deserved happiness. I was convinced I saw the same returned in his look.

The slant of the afternoon sun had moved the shadows on the wall. I had totally blown off my classes for the day. School work had completely left my mind, but now a glint of guilt stung at me. Despite the fact that we both could have easily lingered in the throes of love making all day, we decided to get up.

I put my clothes on while Jesse stepped into the adjoining bathroom. I sat on the edge of the bed, dressing and gazed around at the moving boxes he had started packing, grateful I had gotten to him in time. My eyes stopped on, what appeared to be, old books and memorabilia that his uncle stored in this room before it became Jesse's bedroom. The fact that his uncle had not completely removed his belongings was a sharp reminder that Jesse’s stay in California was only intended to be for a couple months.

There on the wooden bookshelf, wedged between a small family Bible and another book was a worn green photo album. The thought of discovering old photographs of Jesse as a child piqued my interest and I reached for the album.

I sat down on the edge of the bed and gingerly opened the album, careful of its dried plastic page covers, now brittle and yellowed on the edges with age. I smiled as I turned page after page, of old photographs. I recognized some with a much younger and quite handsome version of Uncle Kenny. Pictures of smiling faces, arms around shoulders, family vacations and kids on dirt bikes. It looked like New York state.

Jesse walked out of the bathroom, saw the album and rolled his eyes with a groan. I was dying to have him confirm my notion that the photo I had my finger on, was him and his mother, such a sweet and innocent face looking out at the camera. I couldn’t wait to rib him about being “mama's little man”. Guys hated this kind of stuff. Girls loved it.

“Who’s this?” I pointed to a photo of a little boy standing in front of a calm lake, wearing jeans and a T-shirt. He held a fishing pole, with a tiny fish on the end, and had a big smile. Jesse stood in front of me and examined the page.