“What do you mean,
if
?” Cassy asked.
A tear fell from her eye to her cheek. Davey moved his hand to her face and held her cheek. The restaurant faded to the background as Davey slid his thumb along Cassy’s cheek, collecting her tear, wiping it away.
“Don’t cry,” Davey said. “I can’t imagine how hard it must be for you. Alone. Raising a baby.”
Davey’s heart and mind began to twist together. He wasn’t sure what to say or what to do. Logic and emotion hit each other inside his body, leaving him almost numb. The only thing that broke up what looked to be a romantic scene was Anna announcing her arrival with their meals. When Davey turned his head and looked at Anna -
my gosh, look at her eyes
...
- he quickly took his hand from Cassy’s face. He stared at Anna, unable to stop this time.
He didn’t realize that so many feelings could exist at one time inside a person. And to think that twenty-four hours ago he was on stage, playing guitar with the rest of Chasing Cross and Johnnie’s girl, Jess. It felt like a fantasy right then.
When Anna was gone, Davey forced himself to eat and tried to come up with a plan.
“Where is he now? Donald, I mean.”
“He’s at home, with a friend. He’s in good hands, in case you’re worried.”
“Well, of course I’d be worried,” Davey said.
“You don’t seem too concerned,” Cassy shot at him. “I mean, do you want to meet him again? Maybe actually hold him?”
Davey’s mouth hung open. He thought of his life and how everything played out. Of course he wanted to hold Donald. Hug him, love him. But things needed to be figured out first.
“You have to promise me,” Davey said, “that we can prove everything.”
“So my word isn’t good enough?”
“I never said that. I’m just being real here.”
“Real? And I’m trying to be respectful to you. You’re a celebrity, not me. If I go to the papers...”
“They’ll write a story and it’ll become public news when we get a DNA test,” Davey said. The anger boiled in him again. “You know I’m right. Whether you like it not, Cassy, I have a manager and a legal team behind myself and the band. And by all means, I’m not threatening you. I’m trying to do the right thing here.”
“The right thing would be to realize that you slept with me and now we have a baby together,” Cassy said.
Davey looked around, making sure nobody heard how loud Cassy had just announced that.
“Okay, okay,” Davey said. “Let’s just calm down. Please. Um... I would love to see Donald, again, and hold him. I swear to you, I’m not that kind of father.”
“Good,” Cassy said.
When their meal was finished, Davey had to endure the intense feeling of watching Anna clear their table. She was always smiling, always attentive, the kind of woman that lived on the bright side of life. Davey couldn’t help himself as he tried to picture her in a house or an apartment. What kind of drinks she liked. What kind of snacks she ate while watching her favorite television show.
Even when she leaned over to grab his plate, he couldn’t resist the urge to look at the top of her shirt. If only one more button had been undone on her white shirt...
Davey closed his eyes and mentally slapped himself. He gave Anna his credit card and when she left, Cassy gave Davey an ultimatum.
“Look,” she said, “I know I’m not being fair right now with the idea of a DNA test. Okay? But when I hear that, it just makes me think... I don’t know... it makes me think that you think I’m a slut. That I would just open my legs and whatever.”
“It’s not that,” Davey said. “It’s just I don’t remember us together. Not that it’s your fault. That’s my own damn fault. And it was so long ago. Plus, it would be nice to just see it, for my sake. For my peace of mind.”
“My word isn’t good enough then,” Cassy said.
“Not that. I just want to do what’s right.”
“Well, start by helping me,” Cassy said. “Help me pay for some things and then we can get a DNA test done. How does that sound?”
Money.
Davey took a much needed breath and watched as Anna strutted her way back to the table. He knew it would be the last time he’d see her. She thanked them and waited an extra couple seconds longer than needed. Davey felt her staring at him. He wanted to lock eyes with her and share everything but couldn’t. It actually pained him when she walked away.
Davey signed the credit card slip, adding a huge tip, and made sure Cassy couldn’t see. He hated the fact that he had to act so secretive with a woman he didn’t know.
“I’ll come to you,” Davey said. “Tomorrow. Okay? I’ll come to your house...”
“Apartment,” Cassy said. “I can’t afford a house. I’m a single mother.”
Davey winced. “Apartment. I’ll come to your apartment tomorrow. I’ll help you. I want to see Donald again.”
“I need rent money,” Cassy said. “And other things...”
Davey thought of Donald. The infant in the stroller. The way his eyes looked. The way looking into his eyes felt. Davey always swore to himself that when it was his turn to become a father, he would fix all the wrong he experienced. Sure, this wasn’t perfect, but it was something. It was his chance.
“I’ll be there tomorrow, and I’ll help. I swear on it.”
Cassy looked at Davey. He didn’t feel a connection but he forced a smile.
“Fine,” Cassy said. “That’s a start at least.”
Davey nodded. He’d take it. One step at a time.
As he led Cassy through the restaurant, holding her hand again, he did his best to keep calm. He wanted Cassy gone, for the night, and then he needed time alone to think.
(6)
Anna lingered around the bar, watching the body language between Davey and his date. She had no idea why she was doing it but she couldn’t stop herself. Even the bartender, Jeff, joked with her. He offered to splash some water on her face to cool her off. She threw him the finger and he replied, telling her she couldn’t get that lucky. But Anna knew better. She could get that lucky, especially with Jeff.
With Davey though?
She could dream. And that’s what she told herself. Because one thing was for sure, when she punched out, she would face the torn battle between being in the house of her dreams (the house her grandparents left her to care for) and fighting with credit card companies and student loan companies who were getting more and more impatient. Being threatened didn’t bother Anna much, but threatening to take the house from her was on another level.
Finally, Davey stood from the table and started to leave. Anna pictured Davey leaving the woman behind, but he took no more than two steps before the woman reached for his hand, again, sending the message to everyone looking that Davey was spoken for.
Like hell
, Anna thought and then giggled at herself.
Like she could ever be that abrasive. Hell, she felt bad for arguing with the collection people, the ones that bothered her all day and most of the night.
“Well, your dream date is gone,” Jeff said as he twisted the top off a bottle of beer.
“That’s the key word, Jeff, dream... kind of like you and I.”
“Nice,” Jeff said and walked away.
Anna moved to go clean the table when Debbie, one of the oldest waitresses there, stopped her.
“Hey you. How’d it go with the rockstar?”
“I served him food,” Anna said.
Debbie smiled. Her face wrinkled ten times over. She looked her age and had no problems with it. She drank. She smoked. She loved her job. And she took half her ex-husbands money when she found him in bed with one of his college students. That was the best night of Debbie’s life as far as she was concerned. It was her free ticket to live happily ever after. Which she did by serving tables because she claimed it was what she was born to do.
“At least you met him,” Debbie said. “He sure was cute. If I was ten years younger...”
Anna raised an eyebrow.
“Okay, fine, twenty years younger,” Debbie said and stuck out her tongue.
“Oh, shit,” Anna said.
“What?”
“I didn’t even get his autograph.”
“Keep the credit card slip.”
“Isn’t that illegal?”
“I don’t know,” Debbie said. “Just don’t tell anyone. What happened, did you freeze up?”
“No, not that. He seemed pretty cool. It was that woman he was with...”
“Yeah, saw her. She looks like she needs a steak and a slap in the face.” Anna smiled. Debbie leaned in and said, “Not to mention the rockstar. He looked like he needed a good fuck.”
Anna’s cheeks turned red. “Stop it! Like I’m sure he’s going days without it.”
“I don’t know. That woman looked pretty bitchy.”
“I know,” Anna said. “Seems like they were having problems.”
“You could only dream, right?”
“Yeah. Dream.”
There was that word again.
Dream.
Anna didn’t mind dreaming but sometimes getting stuck in one only ruined the outside world, the real world. She lived in a dream world with Eddie, taking advantage of the nights when he wasn’t gambling, drinking, or managing his drug habit. Those nights they went out, they bought things, did whatever they wanted, all at the swipe of some plastic. Eddie was supposed to be opening a nightclub with his one friend but when it opened, he was offered a bouncer position. Little different than a partner in ownership. By then, Anna expected the lies and none of it surprised her.
Anna started to clear the table. She hoped that Bill would reward her for doing such a good job by letting her off early. Cash out on all the tables she worked on and go home.
Again, one could dream.
When Anna opened the bill and saw Davey’s tip, her mouth fell open. He was well over fifty percent on the bill. She didn’t believe it was right, but it only served to remind her again that Davey was the guitarist for Chasing Cross. The money he spent on dinner, drinks, and tip was probably nothing compared to what he had.
She reset the table and found Bill waiting for her at the bar.
“How’d we do?” he asked.
“You tell me,” Anna said.
“I haven’t heard a thing.”
“No news is good news.”
“Good. Thank you so much for doing that.”
“Doesn’t bother me. He tipped very well.”
Bill smiled. “Okay, you can have your tables back now.”
Anna smiled, expecting nothing less from Bill. If you were at the restaurant, you worked. Bottom line. Not that Anna could complain. If she had been sent home, she knew she’d end up in a hot bath, listening to Chasing Cross songs.
Then again, that didn’t sound so bad...
“You have three tables waiting,” Bill said and patted Anna’s arm with his famous clipboard.
He kept the thing full of papers and flipped through them like they all contained the meaning of life.
The restaurant stayed busy, right up to and through closing time. They were supposed to stop seating at eleven, but Bill kept adding more and more people to the waiting list. He sent the hostess home at ten because she had school the next morning. Leaving Bill to seat people was the equivalent of opening for twenty-four hours. Bill was single and had two cats, so he had no major obligations to run home to. It wasn’t until Jeff finally said something to Bill about getting backed up because of the bar being full and tables still ordering drinks and Bill finally realized what time it was.
“Ten minutes,” he announced to Anna as he stormed by.
Anna nodded. She took care of her last two tables, reset them, and then finally went back to face her cell phone. Not a bad night at all. Only seven calls and three voicemails. Each one being a stern voiced male looking for some kind of payment. Anna knew that game. If she called, they’d haggle for more and more. She hoped once she tipped out, she’d actually have enough to get caught up for the month. That alone would be a blessing. She thought about getting another job, just for the summer, but mentally, it just seemed wasteful to try to make a few extra bucks over the summer. It wouldn’t put a dent in her debt.
She had a couple texts from friends, asking about Davey. Anna shook her head, wondering how they knew he was there. She then realized that between the people who worked at the restaurant and the customers who all had smartphones, able to sneak a a picture and posted it online.
She started to reply to one of her friends when Debbie appeared in the doorway, her hands on her hips.
“There you are. You’re going to miss the show.”
“The show? What’s Bill doing now?”
“Oh, nothing major... just giving you a second chance.”
“Giving me a second chance? At what?”
Debbie reached for Anna. She helped her up and started to fix Anna’s shirt and hair.