Bunches (17 page)

Mortified, I meet JJ’s beautiful
gray eyes.

“Yes, look at me, examine the
beauty in my eyes,” JJ says, grinning, and I shrink even further.

“Did I tell you that last night?”
I ask, a total ball of mortification.

“Oh, yes,” says JJ, beaming.
“Obviously, I was flattered.”

He looks like he’s about to say
something else, but then he stops. We both go breathless at the same time.

“What are you DOING here?” I cry,
shocked again.

“You said goodnight,” he shrugs.
“I thought that was an invitation to stay. It was really late. You didn’t want
me to go all the way back to my apartment, did you?”

“Of course I did,” I say, feeling
my face heat up. “I don’t give a damn what happens to you once I’m
comfortable.”

I clap my hand over my mouth as
JJ chuckles. “Hard-hearted despite the sweetness. I get it.” He shifts the
pillows and braces his head on his laced hands.

“I’m not going anywhere,” he
says. “In fact, I think you should make me breakfast.”

“Did one of the guys at the Black
Jack hit you really hard in the head?” I ask. “Because that’s not happening.”
It’s mostly not happening because I wouldn’t get out of a bed I’m in with JJ
for a million dollars. I have a bucket list to finish, and I’m going to do it.

I snuggle further into the covers
and JJ’s eyebrows rise.

“You aren’t teasing me, are you?”

I grin at him in what I hope is a
suggestive way.

“Nope,” I say coyly. Gosh, people
actually do stuff like this? I kind of like it.

“Didn’t think so,” he, says,
looking away. “By the way, I did my best to help you out, but I stopped short
of removing your makeup for you.”

It takes me all of half a second
to process what he’s saying. With a scream I leap out of bed and rush to the
bathroom, the sound of JJ’s chuckle following me.

I’m a mess. I mean, since I’ve
never cared what guys think about me, I barely wear makeup. Looking good would
get in the way of the whole blending in so no one ever notices me thing, and
I’m not a self-conscious girl. But I seriously want to die when I see my face.
My mascara is streaked and my eyeliner is in all kinds of places that aren’t my
eyes.

After about ten minutes I feel
presentable and head for the kitchen, but JJ isn’t there. Frowning, I check the
living room.

No JJ.

Finally, carefully, I returned to
the bedroom. Sure enough, there he is, curled up with a book. My traitorous cat
is snuggled into his side, purring like a fire engine.

I lean against the door and fold
my arms over my chest, mostly to hide the fact that my hands are shaking. JJ
looks good. Like, really good. He gives me a boyish grin and looks up from his
book.

No wait!

It’s my book.

I want to melt into the floor.

“I have to read it for school,” I
say, shrugging.

“Most girls like any excuse to
read
Pride and Prejudice
for the millionth time,” he says. “Mr. Darcy’s
so sexy.”

“How do you know I’ve read it a
million times?” I ask, still glued to the door.

“Because this book is worn
through,” he says. “I’m surprised it’s staying together.”

“I got it used,” I say.

“Sure you did,” he smiles.

I quirk an eyebrow at him.

“You’re entirely too comfortable
in my bed.”

“There’s no such thing,” he says.

“You should get out of my bed,” I
say, but there’s no heart behind it.

JJ can sense what I mean, and
instead of responding to what I actually say, he just sits up a bit. Snick,
realizing snuggle time is over - at least for him - picks himself up and leaps
off the bed. My heart is racing.

JJ crooks a finger at me and
mouths. “Come here.”

Steeling myself, I walk over to
the bed.

JJ takes my hand and pulls me
down so that I’m curled on top of him, my head resting under his chin. He
lightly rests his other hand on my hip, keeping hold of my other hand with his.
Lightly, I rest my free hand on his chest. I can still feel the heat of his
skin, his hard pecs, and the beat of his heart.

I snuggle closer and JJ gives a
contented sigh.

“Comfortable?” he murmurs. He
brushes the top of my head and holds me closer.

“Mmm humm,” I say. “Very.”

“Good,” he whispers. He lets go
of my hand and I’m about to protest when he places his fingers under my chin
and tilts my face up.

We’re inches apart, breathing the
same air. I want to guzzle it, very unromantic. My silly thought must show in
my face, because his eyes spark.

“Yes?” he asks. I can feel the
start of a rumble in his chest, because, you know, I’m lying on top of JJ
freaking Curtis.

I shake my head, barely daring to
move. “Nothing,” I say.

“Good,” he whispers again, and
tilts his head down to mine. His lips are feather light, barely caressing mine.
I’m trembling all over, and he releases his chin as his hands find my hips
again. This time he gently turns me. It takes me long enough to realize what
he’s doing that I fumble with my hands. They hit all sorts of things, his
torso, his hip, his stomach and lower abdomen. At that one he gives a groan.

Nervous, I let my full body
weight fall onto him so that I can pick my hands up and grip his biceps. I feel
the heat of his skin and hold him closer.

Gently, with the same feather
light touch, JJ rests his hands on my back. I feel his body rise and fall under
me, his breath labored.

“You okay?” he asks hoarsely. I
met his eyes.

I nod once and he starts to rub
his hands over my back, gently kneading and massaging.

“Good,” he murmurs.

I’m staring at his lips. Like,
forget his gorgeous eyes. My eyes are locked on his mouth.

“What?” he asks, laughing a
little now. He almost dislodges me, and his hands tighten on my waist to keep
me steady.

“Nothing,” I murmur. My face must
be beet red and my head still feels fuzzy from the effects of last night.

His phone chooses that moment to
buzz and I silently curse it. I don’t know at what point I realized I wanted
this - I mean, I'm lying on top of him after all - but I do.

JJ swears softly and reaches for
the phone, which is sitting on the nightstand.

“It’s Lila,” he says frowning. “I
have to get this.”

I nod, but I refuse to move. He’s
grinning at me as he answers.

I can hear her tone, but not her
words. She sounds frantic. JJ’s face falls, and reluctantly I push myself off
him. Instantly I miss the contact, but JJ sits up and starts grabbing his
stuff.

“I’ll be right there,” he says.
“Is everyone okay?”

I can’t hear her answer, but JJ
nods. That has to be good, right?

He hangs up the phone and looks
at me. “There was a fire at the Remember,” he says. “They think it might have
been set intentionally.”

I clap my hand over my mouth.
“That’s awful. I’m so sorry.”

His eyes look so sad I can't bear
to look at them, and there’s tension in every line of his body. “Are you going
to be alright?”

“Sure,” I say. “I’m going to
spend the day seeing what it feels like to be an irresponsible lush.”

He smiles a little at that, and
my heart lifts a fraction.

“Good,” he says. “I’ll call you
later and let you know what’s happened.” He starts forward, as if he wants to
do something more, but then he thinks better of it, gives me a nod, and leaves
without looking back.

I feel lost. I had been imagining
that we’d spend the day together. Of course we have to respect the fact that he
and Jessie just broke up, but a moment before this I didn’t really want to. Now
the Remember might have burned, and I can't even take in what that might end up
meaning.

I check my phone and see several
messages from Lizzy, who wants me to meet her and Noah at the coffee shop. I
grab my wallet and rush out, eager to see what they’ve heard about the
Remember.

As soon as I walk in the door,
two sets of eyes turn questioningly toward me.

“Sooo,” says Lizzy gleefully,
“how’s our most recent lush?”

I roll my eyes and blush. I hate
losing control, and this time it didn't even make me feel better, especially
because JJ saw it.

Lizzy and Noah are sitting at one
of the tables in the corner, and I’m glad no one else is in the shop. I would
have felt uncomfortable talking about JJ in front of strangers.

I go over and sit down. Noah has
already gotten me coffee, and he has a ridiculous grin on his face. “You two
better come back next summer when I’m twenty-one,” he says. “I hate missing
this stuff.”

“Assuming I let you back next
summer,” yells his grandmother’s voice from the back.

“Gram's here,” he says, still
grinning as he cradles his own mug.

“Tell. Me. Everything,” Lizzy
says.

I just shrug. “Nothing much
happened,” I say. “He just brought me home. Now there’s apparently a fire at
the Remember.”

“Oh, no!” says Lizzy, while Noah
holds up his hand.

“Hang on,” he says, “do you know
that because JJ texted you about it, or because he was there this morning to
tell you about it?”

“Ohhh,” says Lizzy, her eyes
lighting up. “Nora, tsk tsk.” She's laughing.

“Hey,” I say, “I’m young. I can
flirt.” But it’s more than that. It’s so much more than that, and we all know
it.

Lizzy rolls her eyes. “Yeah, you
can. I’ve been trying to tell you that for years.”

“What about you?” I say. “Where’s
Steven? You were supposed to spend summers together and you don’t. Instead, you
drag me and Aimee to bars and flirt with everything that moves.”

“NO I DO NOT,” Lizzy yells. “I
only flirt with
guys
that move!”

We glare at each other for a few
seconds, then break into uncontrollable laughter. I’m glad Lizzy has broken the
tension, because I hate fighting, especially with my best friend.

We sit there in the coffee shop
for a long time. I’m shatteringly happy, and I’m afraid that if I make a wrong
move or take a wrong breath, I’ll ruin it. The thought that JJ having to deal
with a fire at the Remember is on my mind, and I tell my friends about it, but
they tell me not to worry until I hear from him. I try not to, but I keep
checking my phone.

I just stay there hanging out
with my friends, smiling the whole time.

No one ever wishes the weekend to
last only one day, but I kind of do at this point, because Saturday was
wonderful and now Sunday sucks. I’m so wrapped up in talking to my friends that
I don’t hear my phone buzz. When I finally look at it I see both a missed call
and a voice mail.

JJ has probably tried to call me
and I've missed it! I scramble for my phone.

But the number isn’t JJ’s. I
don’t recognize it, except that I know it’s Boston. Fear grips me. What if
something has happened to my mom or dad?

Shoving that thought away, I
excuse myself and play the voice mail.

I had thought I was done with
defining moments, but I was wrong.

“Hello, Nora, it’s Mrs. Rockwell.
[pause] I know it’s been a long time. I wanted to speak with you, but your mom
tells me you aren’t going to be home this summer, which is a shame, so I
thought I’d come to you. I’m in Portland. Call me back at this number, so we
can meet up. [pause]” And then, her voice cracking, “Please.”

I lean against the wall of the
shop, feeling as if I'll fall over otherwise. Michael’s mom wants to see me,
like, today.

Lizzy and Noah see me and come
rushing out. I know my face has gone white from shock. I can barely get the
words out to explain.

“Are you going to call her back?”
Lizzy asks. I’ve wanted to talk to this woman, this woman I thought would be my
second mother, for five years.

There’s no way I have the
strength to meet with her, except that I do, because of JJ. Knowing I’ll get to
go home and tell him all about it and he’ll hold me gives me the strength that
I need to stand up.

I know I should have called my
mom. She must have given Mrs. Rockwell my number.

I should call Mom now, actually.
I can’t breathe and I press my hand to my chest, surprised emotions choking me.
Michael’s mom has just left me a voicemail.

Right after the anniversary of
Michael’s death she has called me, no, she has come all this way to see me, and
now she’s here.

With shaking hands I call her
back. Noah puts his arm comfortingly around my shoulders and Lizzy stands there
biting her lip, her eyes filled with sympathy.

Our conversation is very brief.
We are both filled with too much emotion. She’s staying at an inn on the
outskirts of town, but just for tonight. She can’t be gone long because of all
the last minute preparations for Amelia’s wedding.