Carla Kelly (25 page)

“That seems so long ago,” Libby murmured.

“The beginning of summer,” her replied, handing the salts to Mama. “And now it is hops harvest, and that brings me to the reason for my visit.” He leaned forward and rested his elbows on his knees, looking Joseph in the eye. “It is a two-part errand I come on. I have a proposal for Joseph and a statement for Elizabeth that I dare not postpone further.”

“Speak on, then, sir,” said Mama, the light leaving her eyes. She glanced at her daughter and began to twist her wedding ring again.

“Joseph, I have hired a groom to replace the poor excuse that Father sacked. Perhaps you know of him. Granger of Llydd.”

Joseph sucked in his breath. “Who doesn’t know him, sir? In his day, he was the greatest rider at Newmarket.”

“In his day, lad. That day is long over, but he still knows more about horses than any man who ever drew breath, I declare. He has accepted the position and will work out well, but he needs an assistant. Someone young and agile, someone like you, Joseph. Would you consider the position?”

Libby watched her brother’s face. She glanced at her mother and looked away quickly. Mama was crying, the tears sliding quietly down her beautiful face. Impulsively, Libby turned to the doctor. “You’re the best man I know, Anthony,” she whispered.

“I hope you still feel that way in a few minutes,” was his only comment to her. “Well, Joseph, I have put it to you. We can discuss salary later with your uncle, if your mother thinks that advisable. Your duties will also include driving me on calls occasionally, particularly if I have been out already and am too tired to do so myself. I recall that was good advice from Nez, and I shall take it.”

Mama blew her nose, composed herself, and looked at the doctor. “Sir, does your father know of this?”

Anthony smiled. “It was his idea, ma’am. I wasn’t bright enough to think of it.”

Mama began to cry again.

Joseph leapt to his feet. “I will do it, sir. Then Mama will not be a watering pot.”

They laughed, and Anthony rose, holding out his hand. “Let us shake on it, Joseph. Very good. Is it too much to ask, or could you leave with me in the morning? Hops harvest is upon us, and we are all needed at home.”

Joseph looked at his mother, who nodded through her tears. “Yes, sir, I can. I shall go pack right now.” He ran to the door and looked back at the doctor, his voice filled with quiet dignity. “Of all things, this is what I wanted the most, sir: the chance to earn my own way. I’ll never disappoint you.”

It was the doctor’s turn to look thoughtful and rub at the spot between his eyes. “I know that, lad. Seems to run in your family, doesn’t it?”

Joseph was gone, pounding up the stairs. They heard him let out a shout as the door closed to his room.

Mama dried her eyes and managed a watery smile.

The doctor was still on his feet. He held out his hand to Libby, who took it and let him lift her up. “The second matter requires a different setting, madam. I have something I need to say to Elizabeth that I have been putting off. Will you excuse us?”

Mystified, Mama nodded and went back to her handkerchief. Elizabeth reached for her bonnet, but the doctor set it aside. “No. I can’t see your face with that lovely bit of foofraw on your head.”

Wordlessly, she followed him into the street and onto Marine Parade, where other couples strolled. He made his way toward the Promenade, her hand clutching his arm rather too tight.

Now he will cry off, she thought, and braced herself for the inevitable. To her surprise, he began to speak of inconsequentials. In another moment, she was at her ease and laughing along with him. And noticing, too, how ladies glanced his way, some peeking around their escorts for a second look.

“Don’t look now, sir, but you are being much admired,” she said as they strolled along. “Gentlemen and ladies both seem to find you notable.”

“Ah, silly you! If it is men, they are admiring you, my dear, as all men always will. It is their nature. If the men glance my way, it is envy.”

She laughed and he tipped up his spectacles to give her that nearsighted stare she had been missing. “Envy, dear Elizabeth, envy! I hope that I also give them something to live for. The knowledge that no matter how well-stuffed and homely the man, it is possible to engage the interest of beauty.” He kissed her hand. “Heaven knows how, but there you are.”

“Knothead,” she declared with some feeling. “When it is women who plainly admire you, how do you explain that away, Doctor?”

“Doctor, is it? Simple, Elizabeth, simple! I am surprised that your fine brain did not beat me to the reason. The women admire you first, as all women must. It is their nature. Then they look at me and realize how great is your compassion.”

She cast him a speaking glance and he threw back his head and laughed. The sound brought tears to her eyes, which she declared came from sand blowing in from the beach, when he broke off and looked at her with some consternation.

“Elizabeth, what is the matter?” he asked.

She shook her head and refused to look at him. “I think I am just glad to hear you laugh,” she whispered. “I didn’t leave you in very comfortable circumstance.”

He tucked her arm in his again and strolled along the boardwalk, moving away from the crowds that swarmed near the Royal Pavilion. “No, it was not a happy time. Father is better, but he will never be well again, I fear. Curious, Elizabeth, but he looks old now, where he did not before. He requires more of my time, and I give it gladly. I think we have talked more in the past month than we have in twenty-five years.” He sighed. “So much to make up for.”

And then she understood what he was trying to tell her. There wasn’t room in his life for her right now. She turned her face into his sleeve, feeling a physical pain at the thought of what was coming. She couldn’t bear a second rejection. Something in her rebelled against it. She would have to beat him to the occasion. She turned to face him, and he stopped walking.

“Anthony, you don’t have to apologize or run around Robin Hood’s barn.”

He looked down at her, surprised. “What on earth are you talking about? Here I am trying to work up the nerve—”

“Don’t,” she cut in. “I know that proposal of yours was impulsive, and please don’t think that I will hold you to it.” She held up her hand when he tried to speak. “Now, let me finish. It was lovely of you and I appreciate your kindness more than you know, but I’m not a fool.”

“I know that,” he murmured, looking at her with an expression very close to love. “You’re just a bit tired of being buffeted about.”

She nodded and leaned her forehead against his chest as the tears came to her eyes. “Let’s go back now. You don’t need to say anything. I understand perfectly.”

He took her by the shoulders and led her over to a nearby bench, sitting her down firmly. “You don’t have the slightest inkling of what I am about to say, my dear.”

She looked at him, wide-eyed. “You’re not going to cry off?”

“Good God, no,” he said, and put his arm around her. “I could never do that.” He looked out to sea. “No, no, what I have to say is something of a delicate nature that I tried to put into a letter, but thought better of it each time I tried.”

“I waited for a letter,” she said.

He smiled. “You’d have gotten plenty of them if thoughts were pen and paper, Elizabeth. I’m sorry.”

He stood up then, waited until a strolling couple passed them, and walked to the boardwalk railing, resting his elbows and looking at her. His face grew red. “My dear, when I wore my father down and he consented to frank me in medical school, he sent me off on the mail coach with a valuable bit of advice.”

“Yes?” she encouraged when he paused as another couple passed.

“Oh, dash it all,” he exclaimed, and took her by the hand, hurrying her along the boardwalk until they came to the end of it and there were no other couples. She sat down and dangled her legs off the walk as he sat down beside her.

“What was this valuable piece of advice?”

He took a deep breath. “Simply this. I was to avoid the prostitutes and devote myself to my studies.”

“Oh,” she said, her face reddening.

“It was grand counsel, Elizabeth,” he said. “Although I must admit that the ‘Edinburra hoors’ were scarcely tempting. All that wet wool and smelling of oatmeal. Oh, Lord, and when we got them in the infirmary and them so diseased!” He made a face. “I applied myself to my studies and finished at the top of my class.”

He took his glasses off, cleaned them, and put them on again, the high color evident in his face. “Well, my dear, what with one thing and another, the years have passed and all my knowledge of women remains theoretical and clinical.”

He peered at her and she looked at him. “Anthony, are you trying to tell me that . . .” She couldn’t quite think of how to say it.

“That I am totally without experience with women,” he finished in one fast sentence. “I am remarkably well-versed in female anatomy and physiology, but, my dear, I remain the veriest amateur.” He spread his hands out, palms up, in his lap. “Well, there you have it. I fear that would frighten off any woman. I know such behavior is not the norm in our rather promiscuous society, and from what I hear in the clubs, anyway, women seem to prefer a little experience in their men. At least that is the excuse that men give. How do I know? I hope you are not too disappointed. I wanted you to know.” He laughed softly to himself. “You’d have figured it out, in any event. Say something, Elizabeth.”

The laughter welled up inside her, but she forced it down. If I go into whoops, he will not understand, she thought. He will think I am making fun of him, something I would not do for the world. I wonder how much sleep he lost over this? Oh, Anthony.

She got up and dusted the bits of sand off her dress. She held out her hand to the doctor and pulled him to his feet. When he was standing up, she threw her arms around him and began to giggle. In another moment he was laughing, too, and it was the most wonderful sound she had ever heard.

She raised her face to his. “Kiss me, Dr. Cook,” she demanded.

He obliged her, kissing her slowly, over and over, completely absorbed in the matter at hand, even though couples strolled by, tittered, and hurried on. His glasses fell into the sand, but other than to push them away with his foot to make sure that he did not tread on them, the doctor let them go.

When he stopped finally and retrieved his spectacles, Libby could only regard him with new respect. She took his arm and started him back toward the Marine Parade. “I would say, sir, that your theories are sound, indeed.”

“You don’t mind that I am so inexperienced?”

“Sir, I am flattered,” Libby said simply. “You have paid me such a compliment.”

By the time they reached the house, they had agreed upon a wedding date in two weeks’ time at St. John’s in Holyoke.

“It is not grand enough for your cousin, but I think it adequate,” said the doctor. “Such short notice requires a special license, I suppose. Can you have a dress by then?” he asked, and kissed her on the ear. “Not that it signifies. The one you are wearing is lovely.”

Her eyes danced. “Yes, and only one shilling, remember? I will be a wonderful economy in your household.”

“Thank the Lord for that,” he declared fervently, with just a trace of unsteadiness in his voice. “That means I can spend more money on books. Oh, Elizabeth, I love you.” He put his arm around her waist. “And the wonderful thing is, I always will.”

He left in the morning with Joseph, both of them well-kissed and cried-over.

As soon as Libby’s eyes were dry, Mama marched her to High Street and selected yards and yards of white taffeta. “You will rustle in the most gorgeous fashion as you walk down the aisle,” she said. “It’s a sound I most want to hear.” And then Mama burst into tears, to the consternation of the shopkeeper, who hurried over to apologize for the material.

Uncle Ames returned that afternoon from London, grumpy over the division of his spoils with the Wiltmores. “Damnedest family ever,” he said, “pockets to let and expenses to choke an elephant. Don’t know why I ever agreed to such silliness so many years ago. I must have been polluted.” He growled himself into his favorite chair and stifled an oath as Mama pushed a pillow under his gouty foot.

He smiled over Libby’s good news and chucked her under the chin. “Good for you, minx,” he said. “I don’t know that I ever thought Dr. Cook would be the answer to a maiden’s prayers, but I’m happy for you. Does this mean I get his services free now?”

Libby laughed. “I shall ask him when is in a good mood.”

“And that will be every time he looks at you, puss.” He sighed. “I suppose I will have to give out another wedding gift,” he grumbled, and then winked at her. “Do you love him, dear?”

“I think so,” she said.

“But you don’t know? Time will tell, puss, time will tell.”

The dress was done a week later, a dream of a dress, low across the bosom and gently gathered into a graceful train at the back. Mama carefully packed it in tissue paper and rested it on the seat across from them in Uncle William’s post chaise. When Mama pronounced herself satisfied, the carriage door closed and they began the trip to Holyoke.

They arrived at nightfall, to be greeted by Candlow.

“Madam, what a pleasure to have you home again,” he said to Mrs. Ames, taking the dress box from her. He inclined his head toward Libby. “And may I be the first in the house to congratulate you? Dr. Cook told me, and I couldn’t be more delighted.”

He ushered them into the sitting room. Mama removed her bonnet and fluffed her hair, then crossed to the table where the mail was left. She set aside her letters and held out a package to Libby.

“For you, dear.” She looked closer. “Gracious! It has been franked by a lord. I wonder who can have sent that?”

Libby took the package. The handwriting was bold, but unfamiliar to her and she could not read the name. She tore off the wrapping paper and stared down at a box of Copley’s Finest Nut Mix. A note was tucked under the ribbon. With fingers that trembled, she plucked it out and opened it.

“Forgive me if you can. Nez.”