Carole Singer's Christmas (21 page)

Walking home towards the cottage, Carole wasn’t so sure about that. She was beginning to get the feeling that her heart was leading her in completely the wrong direction and there seemed to be less and less that she could do about it.

‘Hold up!’ Josie yelled after her. ‘I thought we were going to the pub?’

‘Sorry Josie,’ Carole said, ‘I’m not sure I can face it. I’m tired and it’s freezing. I just want to get home.’

‘Don’t be such a grouch. I need a drink and so do you by the sound of it. We’re going.’

CHAPTER EIGHTEEN

‘Come on then,’ Josie asked impatiently, ‘tell me what’s wrong. I thought you’d be blissfully happy now that your mum is almost back to her old self. You seem to be getting on great and Jamie’s really lovely, isn’t he? So what’s up?’

‘Nothing,’ Carole replied, fiddling with the stem of her wine glass.

‘Yeah right! You’re staring into that glass as if you’d like to dive into it head first and drown yourself. Come on. Spill. And I don’t mean the wine.’

Carole smirked. ‘It’s just ... why does life have to be so complicated? Just a few weeks ago, I was happy and content with my life with Dom and now ...’

Josie looked thoughtful. ‘Perhaps that means you weren’t. Happy and content I mean. After all, if you really, truly were and if you really, truly loved Dom, you wouldn’t be thinking of leaving him, would you? Let’s face it. It’s better to find out now that you still have feelings for Sebastian or even that you may have feelings for someone else, than to find out ten years down the line that you’ve made a huge mistake.’

‘Like Sebastian, you mean?’

Josie shrugged. ‘Yeah. Or anyone. Lots of people do it. They get married for totally the wrong reasons and then regret it. I know you love Dom but it seems to me that the real reason you wanted to get married was just so that you could change your name from Carole Singer to Carole Smith – and frankly, I’m not convinced that’s a great improvement. Carole Singer sounds jolly and light and carefree, like the Carole I know and love. Carole Smith sounds ... well, sensible and ... boring.’

‘Hmm. Jolly, light and carefree? I think you have me confused with someone else, Josie.’

‘Rubbish! I’m sorry to stir up painful memories but before your dad died, you were the life and soul of the party. I know you went through a terrible time and then all the stuff with your mum and Sebastian but you came through it all and even at your lowest moments, your dad’s death and Seb leaving you, you managed to retain some humour. I’m sure that’s what got you through it all. And you get that from your dad. And let’s be honest, if you really hate your surname so much, why not change it by deed poll?’ 

Carole stared at her friend. ‘Because it’s my dad’s! I ... I couldn’t do that. I’d ... I’d feel as if I were betraying his memory somehow. I know it sounds stupid but changing it by getting married is different. That ... that seems okay because that’s the natural course of things.’

‘Hmm,’ Josie said. ‘I forgot mad. Jolly, light, carefree and as mad as they come. You could have changed the Carole part. No, don’t tell me. That was the name your dad gave you.’

‘Well it was!’

‘Fine. Anyway, I’m just saying, perhaps instead of trying to decide whether you love Dom or Sebastian or ... you know who, who just happens to be walking in the door right now, perhaps you should try to decide
why
you love them. Hi Nick. We missed you at rehearsals tonight.’

Carole’s back was to the door but she could feel Nick’s eyes on her as if an archer had loosed a quiver of arrows at her.

‘Hi,’ he replied, walking over and standing beside their table with Nicodemus following and sitting at his feet. ‘I had an emergency call out. Couldn’t make it.’ His eyes seem to scan the bar. ‘Where’s Sebastian?’

‘No idea,’ Josie said.

‘Oh! I’d heard you were–’

‘You heard wrong,’ Carole interrupted, seeing him direct his comment to her and knowing what he was going to say.

She stroked Nicodemus’ head and tickled him under his chin. He leant towards her, resting his body against her legs and his head on her knee.

‘Oh,’ Nick said, giving Nicodemus an odd look as if to say ‘traitor’.

‘But I am tomorrow,’ Carole added as an afterthought. He’d no doubt find out anyway so she may as well get it over with. She waited for the sarcastic barb but there was none.

‘Oh. Can I get you a drink? Wine is it for both of you?’

‘Yes please,’ Josie said.

Nick headed to the bar whilst Nicodemus stayed where he was. Carole couldn’t help but notice that the hound’s eyes were watching Nick’s every movement and she suddenly realised that hers were too. Eventually, Josie leant in towards her.

‘Shall I make an excuse and leave you and Nick to it?’

‘Don’t you dare!’ Carole exclaimed. ‘I mean it, Josie. No.’

‘Coward.’

‘I’m not a coward. I ...’

‘So ... how was the tree?’ Josie asked as Nick returned.

‘Not as bad as I thought it was going to be,’ he remarked, handing them their wine. ‘It’s difficult working at night and even with emergency lights and a generator, you can’t see as clearly. Shadows can deceive you so you have to be doubly careful but this one went very smoothly. How were rehearsals?’

‘Good,’ Josie said. ‘Astonishingly, it all seems to be coming together and with Carole’s scenery and the costumes I’m helping with, which even with my abysmal sewing skills, aren’t half bad, I think we’ll have a pretty impressive production. For a tiny hall in a small village, you understand.’

Nick grinned. ‘I saw some of the costumes the other night. They really are very good, Josie. Perhaps you should give sewing lessons as well as music lessons.’

‘I could have ‘sew while you sing’ evenings ... or should that be ‘sing while you sew’? Anyway, I can picture it now, all sitting round a roaring fire with our sewing baskets to one side, mop caps on our heads, me playing the piano, struggling to breathe in my whalebone corset. Oh sorry, I was forgetting which century we’re in.’

‘I can picture it too,’ Nick said with a serious look on his face as if he were doing just that. ‘A group of women wearing only mop caps and whalebone corsets...’

Josie gave him a playful slap on his arm. ‘Talking of women, Nick, is there anyone in the village who takes your fancy?’

Carole thought she saw Nick spill some of his beer but as she was trying not to choke on her mouthful of wine, she couldn’t be sure.

‘Well,’ he said, giving Josie a sideways glance, ‘if Mitsy were only a few years younger.’ He let out a long, dramatic sigh and grinned before gulping down several mouthfuls of beer.

Carole gave Josie a look, which she hoped said, ‘Stop it now,’ but Josie grinned at her, so she prepared herself for the next remark.

‘Carole looks remarkably like Mitsy did when she was Carole’s age.’

Carole hoped the gasp she made didn’t sound as loud to Nick as it had to her.

‘I know.’ Nick was giving nothing away in his tone. ‘I’ve seen the photos. And what about you, madam? Who’ve you got your eye on ... now that we know it’s not Justin Jarvis?’

‘Oh, I’m just waiting for Carole to make up her mind, then I’ll have one of her cast-offs.’

‘Josie!’ Carole shrieked, glaring at her friend.

‘And what if Carole decides to keep them both?’ Nick cut in, grinning, although there wasn’t a trace of humour in his voice.

‘Nah. She’s not the type, Nick. She’s a one man kind of woman deep down. She–’

‘Would you mind not discussing me as if I’m not here, please?’Carole snapped.

Nick ignored her and leant forward. ‘She...?’

‘Oh. She believes in
the one true love
. Don’t you, Carole?’

Carole saw Nick look at her but he quickly looked away.

‘So what if I do! What’s wrong with that?’

‘There’s nothing wrong with that,’ Nick said, ‘I happen to be a believer myself.’

‘She just can’t decide which one of the three is her true love though. Ah!’ Josie shot a look at Carole and clearly realised her mistake. ‘Two! I meant, which one of the two.’

Nick glanced from Josie to Carole.

‘I think that’s quite enough about me, thank you very much, and I also think it’s time I went home. I’ve got a really busy day tomorrow.’

‘It must be very difficult for you then,’ Nick said, staring her straight in the eye. ‘Being in love with two different men and not being able to decide.’

Carole swallowed and tried to avoid his gaze. She looked down at Nicodemus and stroked his head.

‘Dad used to say you should listen to your heart,’ she said. ‘So that’s what I intend to do.’

‘Your dad was right,’ Nick agreed.

‘And in the meantime she’s just got to figure out a way to keep them apart,’ Josie said. ‘Sorry! But it’s true.’

‘You could always try telling them how you feel,’ Nick said. ‘Being honest with them both might be a good place to start.’

Carole’s head shot up. ‘Is this going to be another lecture on my morals? Because if it is, I’m not sure I want to hear it.’

Nick shook his head and got to his feet. ‘Nope. No lecture. It’s none of my business anyway. And it’s time I took Nicodemus for his walk. I’ll say goodnight, ladies.’

Nicodemus was already on his feet  at the mention of his walk and both man and hound were gone before Josie and Carole had finished saying goodnight.

‘What the hell was all that about?’ Carole demanded when she was sure Nick was out of earshot.

‘I wanted to see what he’d say,’ Josie said, grinning.

‘Why? What good did it do?’

Josie furrowed her brow. ‘Didn’t you see him? Didn’t you see the way he looked at you?’

‘Yes. He looked at me as if I’m a trollop. ‘Be honest with them. Tell them how you feel’. How am I supposed to tell Dom that not only do I think I’m still in love with my ex-fiancé but there is a very strong possibility that I may also have fallen in love with a total stranger? And the worst thing about it, the absolutely infuriatingly sickening part of it is, he’s right. Nick is absolutely right. I should tell them the truth. And do you know what? I shall! Sebastian knows about Dom of course, but I’ll tell Dom about Sebastian on Friday.’

‘That should go down well. And Nick? Are you telling either of them about Nick?’

Carole shook her head. ‘There’s no point because nothing’s going to happen between me and Nick. I’ve just got to decide if I want to be with Sebastian or with Dom or ... with neither of them.’

‘That’s good. Because I have been wondering how on earth you planned to keep Dom from finding out, especially as everyone in the village knows that Sebastian proposed to you ... again. And I think you may be wrong about Nick. I wouldn’t be at all surprised if something happened between you two. Not surprised at all.’

***

Carole was beginning to wish she’d insisted on meeting Sebastian for just a drink and hadn’t agreed to dinner. It had been a very long Thursday, or at least it seemed as if it had and all she really wanted to do was curl up in front of the fire with a glass of wine and a good book.

She knew it was going to be a difficult evening when Sebastian texted her telling her to ‘dress up’ and she was tempted to send a text back saying, ‘No’, but she didn’t. It got worse when she went downstairs to ask her mum to zip up the dress she was wearing.

‘Mum, can you zip this up for me. I can’t ... Oh! Nick. Hi.’

Nick was chatting to Mitsy but he glanced round at the sound of Carole’s voice. And he did a double take. Even Mitsy saw it, Carole was sure.

‘Wow!’ he said, looking her up and down.

It felt to Carole as if the red crepe crossover bodice had suddenly constricted and she couldn’t breathe and that if it were possible for a dress to spring to life and flirt, then the A-line skirt seemed to be doing just that. It clung to her hips, swung around her thighs and danced just above her knees. If it had worn a talking banner saying ‘Look at me’ it couldn’t have got any more attention. And it certainly had Nick’s undivided attention.

‘Wow!’ he repeated when his eyes had scanned every inch of her. ‘You look ... incredible!’

Embarrassed and more than a little flustered by the strange look in his dark eyes she said, ‘You sound surprised. But thank you ... I think.’

‘I am surprised,’ he said. ‘Sebastian is a very lucky man. You wanted help with the zip, I believe.’

‘No! I mean, Mum can help me.’

‘She can’t, I’m afraid, sweetheart, Mitsy said. ‘She and Jamie have popped out to get fish and chips from the village. They’ll be at least ten minutes. And you do look gorgeous, dear. Come here and give me a twirl.’

‘Gran. I ... I’d rather not. And I can wait until Mum gets back.’

‘Don’t be silly,’ Nick said, walking towards her. ‘I’m perfectly capable of zipping up a dress.’ He took her gently by the arms and twisted her around.

‘Oh!’ she said, shocked by the feel of his hands on her bare arms.

‘And it’s not the first time I’ve had to do this you know.’

She felt her backbone stiffen. ‘I don’t suppose so,’ she replied which sounded somewhat snippy even to her ears. But when his fingers brushed her skin, ran over the hooks of her bra and trailed up her skin again, she had to close her eyes and bite her lip to stop a little moan of pleasure from escaping.

He slid his hands across her shoulders and turned her around to face him and they were just inches apart. He looked into her eyes and a slow grin formed on his mouth.

‘Mary was always asking me to zip her up when she was dating Harry,’ he said, letting his hands slide slowly down her arms before he turned and resumed his seat opposite Mitsy.

Carole knew the floor couldn’t be swaying but she felt as if it were. He did that on purpose she thought and it made her madder than she had been all day.

‘Well’ she said, ‘as you won’t be here by the time I get back and Mum and Jamie will no doubt be fast asleep in bed, I’ll have to get Seb to help me unzip it.’

She wasn’t sure which of them looked more shocked and annoyed – Nick, or her gran, but as the doorbell rang at just that second, she was saved from their responses. She quickly slipped her arms into her matching red, fluffy shrug, grabbed her coat and dashed towards the door.