Catastrophe Practice (5 page)

Don't shoot! I'm pregnant!

After a time the Footman comes on through the loggia He stands on the top of the loggia steps. He watches Jenny
.

Jenny looks amongst the audience
.

The Footman goes to Helena's chair
.

Jenny lowers her hands
.

The Footman wheels Helena's chair towards the back of the loggia
.

Just before Helena and the Footman go off Jenny yells —

They can make you say anything!

Helena sits up gripping the sides of the chair as if terrified
.

Jenny smiles
.

Then the Footman wheels Helena off
.

Jenny goes and leans with her back against the proscenium arch, left. She looks up, as if basking in the sun
.

From now on, it is as if the actors were confident they had found a style proper for what they are demonstrating
.

After a time Ariel runs on from behind the pillar of the loggia
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He goes to the balustrade at the back and climbs on to it and walks along holding his arms out like a bird. Then he jumps off and goes to the crack in the rocks and squats down by it and puts his fingers in
.

Jenny remains with her eyes closed. Then she holds her hand out as if she were trying to make shadows with her fingers on a wall
.

After a time Judith comes on from behind the loggia. She wears her black dress. She moves along the balustrade. Then she turns to Ariel
.

Ariel is facing the audience with his eyes closed. Judith puts a leg up on the balustrade as if about to climb over
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— And would he never, never do this to anyone again.

Ariel does not move
.

Judith seems to become interested in what he is doing with the crack in the rocks. She climbs down from the balustrade. She walks about the stage, acting as if she were not interested in what she is saying
.

You know, when I was on that ledge, there was a humming bird in front of a flower. And its wings moved so fast that you couldn't see —

She comes and looks over Ariel's shoulder
.

And my body, which I hate, had wires attached to its shoulders —

She looks up at the audience
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So that when you pulled, you could see —

She waits
.

The back of your own head? Angels?

After a time she moves off round the stage again
.

I do wonder if you'll get that job! It's so difficult, nowadays, with so many opportunities open —

Ariel suddenly yells —

Judith stops. She stares at the audience
.

After a time —

She seems to find it difficult not to laugh — or cry. Then she goes to the balustrade and puts a leg up and climbs over
.

At the far side, she is on a slightly lower level to that of the stage. She walks off, left, with just her head and shoulders visible above the balustrade. She is like a target on a fun-fair shooting range. Ariel watches where she has gone
.

After a time Jenny, with her back against the proscenium arch, left, holds out her hand and lets fall from it a pendant which dangles on the end of a chain
.

Ariel gets up and stands by Jenny, and takes hold of the pendant dangling from her hand
.

He lets go of the pendant He looks at the audience
.

Jenny moves off round the stage like a water
diviner with the pendant dangling from her hand. She speaks as if she were trying out some formula —

Ariel goes to the balustrade at the back and looks over. Then he looks up to the flies
.

Jenny, walking round the stage with the pendant swinging from her hand, stops above the crack in the rocks, where the pendant becomes still
.

Jenny lowers the pendant towards the crack in the rocks. The backdrop flickers. Then the image of the tree goes out. There appear swirling red lights as if of a town burning. Ariel looks at the audience
.

He seems to be finding it difficult not to laugh. Jenny raises the pendant from the crack in the rocks. The lights on the backdrop become set, like lava
.

Ariel comes to the front of the stage and looks over the footlights
.

Jenny declaims —

Jenny lowers the pendant into the crack in the rocks again
.

Ariel looks at the backdrop
.

Jenny raises and lowers the pendant several times; the backdrop remains the same
.

Ackerman appears on the balcony above the loggia. He is holding what appears to be an old-fashioned gas-mask. He prepares to put it on. Jenny winds the pendant up into her hand
.

Ackerman puts on the gas-mask. He adjusts the straps
.

Jenny watches Ackerman
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— And its mouth was the same as its anus —

Ackerman stares out over the stage in his gasmask
.

Ariel looks at the audience
.

After a time Jenny goes behind a pillar of the loggia. She appears to be taking her dress off. Helena comes on through the loggia with her hands over her ears. She acts —

She takes her hands away from her ears
.

She looks at Ariel, then at Ackerman
.

Then she says in a matter-of-fact voice —

Have you taken the pin out? —

There are three loud bangs from behind the backdrop. Jenny comes out from behind the pillar. She carries her dress in her hand. She watches the backdrop
.

The backdrop begins to change back to the swirling lights of a town burning
.

Ackerman, in his gas-mask, begins to droop over the balustrade as if he were being asphyxiated. Jenny turns to the audience. She stamps her foot by the crack in the rocks; but nothing happens
.

Ackerman has slumped in his gas-mask as if he has been overcome by fumes
.

The others seem to have given up acting
.

Ariel goes to the balustrade at the back and looks over. Then he looks at the audience. Helena looks up at the flies
.

Jenny holds her stomach as if she might be ill. Then she seems to give up acting again
.

The lights in the backdrop become set, like red-hot lava
.

After a time there comes on from behind the loggia, right, Jason, a man in his forties. He wears dark trousers and a white shirt. He carries a coil of wire over his shoulder. It is as if he might be a stage technician
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He walks to the crack in the rocks and looks down. Then he looks up at the flies
.

The others act as if they do not know whether or not he is supposed to be part of whatever they are or are not acting
.

Jason puts his coil of wire down on the ground. He takes from his pocket a penknife and begins to trim an end of the wire as if preparing to make an electrical connection
.

Ariel seems to be amused
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Jenny looks at Jason
.

Ackerman is slumped in his gas-mask
.

Helena is staring at the audience
.

Jason, having trimmed the wire, squats down as if to make an electrical connection within the crack in the rocks
.

Jason looks up; looks round; then he goes back to making his connection in the crack in the rocks
.

After a time Ariel calls —

Jason pauses: looks up at Ariel: then goes back to his electrical connection. Then he stands. He moves to the balustrade at the back, paying out the wire behind him
.

On the way he glances up at Ackerman. When he is by the balustrade he turns and looks at Ariel. He holds out the wire coiled in his hands. After a time Ariel points at himself questioningly. It is as if he were asking — Me? Then he goes and stands by Jason. He raises his hands and acts —

Jenny says as if she were not acting —

Ariel looks over the balustrade. Jason has made a loop with the wire as if to put it round Ariel to lower him — or to rescue someone from down the cliff
.

Helena speaks to Jason
.

Ariel lowers his head. He looks up at the flies
.

Jason throws the looped end of the wire down over the cliff. Then he jerks on the end of the wire that is attached to the crack in the rocks. Jenny ducks with her hands over her ears
.

The others are still
.

Then there comes on at the back of the balustrade, left, Judith. She still wears her black dress. She moves along on the level slightly below that of the stage
.