Dimples appeared, and he lifted her onto the desk, laying her out beneath him. “In
fact, how about next month? I already had two plane tickets to Paris I was going to
surprise you with. Thought you’d like to visit the mecca of all things pastry.”
She stared at him. “You’re taking me to France?”
He pressed a kiss to her parted lips. “No, now I’m
marrying
you in France. If you’ll have me.”
“Wyatt . . .” Everything inside her went still, quiet, as she wrapped her mind around
what he was saying. She saw their future roll out before her. A life filled with shared
laughter and dorky movie references and long mornings in bed.
And hot, kinky sex.
Her normal. Their normal.
“Just say yes,” he said softly.
She smiled, remembering his request from prom. And this time the word was even easier
to say. “Yes.”
He cradled her cheek in his palm and rocked into her. “Come for me, my love. We’ve
got a life to plan.”
She wrapped her arms around his neck and dragged him down for a kiss, crying out in
bliss as they fell over the edge together.
She’d been wrong. So very wrong.
Reality kicked the shit out of fantasy.
Keep reading for an excerpt from the next Loving on the Edge novel by Roni Loren
N
EED
Y
OU
T
ONIGHT
Available soon from Heat Books
PROLOGUE
Someone’s naked ass is on my imported marble counter
tops
. That was Tessa’s first thought when she walked into her kitchen that warm Tuesday
afternoon. Not,
Why is Doug home this early?
Or,
Why does he have his pants around his ankles?
And most definitely not
Why is my best friend moaning like an injured cat?
Nope. Tessa’s brain couldn’t absorb those things just yet. Instead all she could think
about was how there was a butt crack sliding along the spot where she’d chopped strawberries
for breakfast.
The two occupants in the kitchen didn’t even notice they were no longer alone, apparently
too caught up in their counter defiling to bother. God, were they
that
oblivious and swept up in passion? It’s not like she’d been particularly quiet walking
in. And she’d slept with the man who’d dropped trou in this little tableau for the
last ten years. She knew he didn’t inspire losing yourself to the moment. But maybe
he saved his good tricks for Tuesday afternoons when he fucked the woman Tessa would’ve
trusted her life with before today.
Tessa cleared her throat, attempting to draw their attention, but all that greeted
her was the sound of Doug telling that
lying bitch
how hot she was. Rage washed through Tessa in a slow, powerful roll, boiling up and
over until she was shaking with it. She calmly set down her purse next to the fruit
bowl and wrapped her hand around a large navel orange. Without pausing to reflect,
she lifted the fruit and launched it right at her husband’s head.
It went whizzing past him without notice, sailing into the living room, but she couldn’t
stop herself now. She picked up another and hurled it even harder. This one hit him
right on the ear with a fat thud.
“What the fuck?”
Doug’s hand went up to his ear, and he swiveled his head her way. “Shit.”
The traitor on the counter opened her eyes then, her gaze going wide.
But Tessa kept throwing. Oranges, a grapefruit, apples. It was as if some other force
had possessed her. Fruit whizzed across the kitchen, pelting both of them as they
scrambled to get up and pull their clothes around themselves.
“Ow, Tessa, stop it! What the fuck is wrong with you?” Doug roared as he yanked at
his pants with one hand while trying to fend off flying fruit with the other.
“What is wrong with
me
?
Me?!
” Tessa shouted, knowing she sounded like a lunatic but unable to stop herself.
“Tessa, honey,” Marilyn said, hands out in front of her, blouse still hanging open.
“Let’s just calm down, okay?”
Tessa pinned her former best friend with a glare. “Did you just
dare
speak to me?”
“Marilyn, sweetheart,” Doug said softly, putting a hand on her elbow and blocking
her from Tessa with his body. “Why don’t you get out of here? I’ll deal with her.”
Sweetheart? Deal
with her? Loud, crashing bells were going off in Tessa’s head. She was glad the knife
block was out of reach because she wasn’t sure she could trust herself in that moment.
Marilyn nodded after a quick, worried glance at Tessa, then hurried through the living
room toward the sliding glass doors that led to the pool area and a backyard exit.
Apparently, she knew better than to try to walk by Tessa to get to the front door.
Wise move. Because Tessa was ready to throw down, Jerry Springer style.
With a tired sigh, Doug turned back to Tessa, his fly still unbuttoned and his cock
still half-mast behind the material. The bastard hadn’t even lost his erection. In
fact, he looked more annoyed that he’d been interrupted than ashamed of what he’d
done. Tessa’s fist balled. “You lying, cheating asshole.”
He pulled on his dress shirt and looked around the carnage of busted fruit on the
floor. “Call the maid and have her come in early to clean this up. It’ll draw ants
if it sits too long. I’ve got to get back to work.”
Tessa blinked, almost too stunned to speak. “That’s what you have to say for yourself?”
“You don’t want to hear what I have to say.” He adjusted his cuffs like it was any
other day of getting ready for work and not like the whole foundation of their marriage
had just shattered beneath them.
“Oh, no. I really do,” she said, seething.
His mouth curled in condescension. “Fine. You want to hear that I need something on
the side? That you don’t satisfy all of my needs?”
“Your
needs
?” If she’d had another piece of citrus to throw, she would’ve reached for it then.
How many nights had she put all she had into pleasing him even when he hadn’t put
half the effort toward her? How many times had she donned expensive lingerie trying
to catch his eye? She’d been willing to do
anything
for him. She’d loved him.
And he’d been screwing around on her the whole time. With her
best
friend
. The thought almost doubled her over. She reached out and grabbed the edge of the
counter.
“Look, you’re upset. I get it. But, Tessa, it’s just sex. I don’t love them, and I’m
not going to leave you for any of them. They’re not a threat to you.”
“You have the nerve to talk to me about love right now?” she asked, her throat trying
to close.
Them
. So it was more than just Marilyn. She wondered if Marilyn knew she was just the
tramp in the Tuesday slot on his calendar. “You’re disgusting.”
His lips curved back into that patronizing smirk he was so good at. “And you’re boring
in bed and my intellectual inferior, but I’ve learned to live with it. At least you’re
nice to look at now that you’ve gotten your gym routine back on course.”
The hateful words knocked the breath right out of her. Doug had said mean things to
her before in the heat of the moment. They’d been together since high school, so of
course they’d had their fights. He could be critical beyond reason, always watching
that she didn’t eat too many calories or go outdoors without makeup or say the wrong
thing in public. She’d tolerated it because she knew how concerned he was about image
in his business. And she’d comforted herself with those moments when he was sweet
and indulgent with her behind closed doors. He had the capacity to make her feel like
a princess. And even though those times had grown few and far between over the last
five years, she’d had no idea his opinion of her had sunk so low. Boring in bed. Inferior.
Stupid.
God, is that what he told the women he cheated on her with? My wife isn’t too bright,
and she’s clueless in the sack.
She grabbed her purse, her stomach threatening to toss up all its contents. She couldn’t
stand here for another second and look at his smarmy face, smell the scent of sex
in the air. “Go to hell, Doug. I hope you’re happy with your college-educated whores.
Now you won’t have to worry about me getting in the way.”
He scoffed. “Come on, Tessa. Stop being melodramatic. You’re not going to divorce
me. Your life and everything in it exist because of me. Leave, and it all goes away.
You’re going to give up all this just because I like a novel fuck every now and then?
Please.” He grabbed his wallet and flipped a piece of plastic her way. “Take the credit
card. Go punish me by buying something useless and extravagant—you’re good at that—and
we’ll move on.”
The credit card landed at her feet, and she had the urge to spear its platinum face
with the heel of her Jimmy Choo pump. He was right. If she left him, every bit of
her lifestyle would disappear in a poof. From the clothes on her back to the oranges
she’d just hurled at him—all of it was funded by him. There’d be no way to prove his
affair in court, not with the legal demons he could afford to hire. And she’d signed
a pre-nup. She’d be left with a pittance of alimony. All the comfort and security
she’d worked toward her whole life would be gone. She’d be back where she started
all those years ago—a nobody with nothing.
Alone. With no money of her own and only a high-school education to her name.
She bent and picked up the card from the floor, turning it in her fingers before dropping
it in her purse.
Doug smiled, satisfied. Victorious.
Without another word, she turned on her heels and calmly walked back out to her Mercedes.
When she made it into town, she bought the two most extravagant things she could think
of.
The services of an attorney.
And a plane ticket home.
It’d be the last of Doug Barrett’s money she’d ever spend.
ONE
“Hold up. Why are you buying condoms? You said this
was an emergency stop.” Tessa snatched the box of Trojans from Sam’s fingertips and
held them up like Exhibit A.
Sam sent her an innocent look, one that Tessa had seen her use rather effectively
on both sets of foster parents she’d shared with Sam. “What? I’m out. And we may need
them.”
“You may need condoms,” Tessa repeated. “For a
cooking
class.”
Sam grabbed another box from the rack. “
We
may need them. I’ll get some for you, too. You never know who we might meet.”
Tessa groaned and looked up at the buzzing fluorescent lights of the drugstore. Sam’s
ability to look for dating opportunities around every corner never failed to amaze
Tessa. “We’re not going to meet anyone. It’s a cooking class. It’s going to be married
couples, women, and gay men.”
Which is exactly why Tessa had agreed to go. After months of Sam trying to drag her
out to bars or clubs on Friday nights to get her over that “dickwad ex-husband,” finally
her friend had come up with something that didn’t make Tessa’s stomach turn and her
body break out into a cold sweat. But now, as she took in Sam’s snug skirt and high
heels, Tessa’s dread was growing. She’d thought Sam had simply chosen to dress up
because the class was being held at one of the swankiest restaurants in Dallas. But
now the puzzle pieces were locking together into a new picture.
“Straight men like to cook, too,” Sam pointed out as she strolled away from the prophylactics
aisle toward the cosmetics section. “Particularly when it’s a Perfect Match meet-up
event.”
Tessa’s shoe squeaked on the floor as she halted mid-stride. “Sam, you’d better be
screwing with me.”
Sam grabbed a lip gloss off a rack and held the colored cap next to Tessa’s mouth,
frowned, then picked up a different color. “I’m not screwing with you. I’m
helping
you. My friend is the receptionist at the local Perfect Match office. She offered
to sneak us onto the list because the event wasn’t full. How could I pass it up? It
was like fate tapping my shoulder. You want to scratch items off your list. This will
accomplish that and maybe get you a date as a bonus. Two for the price of one.”
“Learning to cook is on my list. Dating is not. Dating is actually diametrically opposed
to the whole spirit of the list.”
“Diametrically? Wow, someone’s getting A’s in her night classes.” Sam gave her a teasing
smile and dropped the lip gloss into her hand basket. “And if I’m not mistaken, one
of the items you have on that sacred to-do list of yours is to tackle being ‘boring
in bed.’ How exactly do you plan to fix that one without actually coming into contact
with the opposite sex?”
A guy perusing greeting cards across the aisle gave them a sideways glance and smirked.
Tessa’s face heated. “Could you at least try to keep your voice down while discussing
my sex life?”
“What sex life?” Sam replied, not bothering to lower her voice. “This is exactly why
we’re going tonight. You need to loosen up. Be open to a world of infinite possibilities.
And by possibilities, I mean hot men.”
“Ugh.” She should’ve never let Sam see her stupid list. It’d been something she’d
written down in those first few weeks after she’d left Doug and her life in Atlanta.
She’d landed in Dallas with no plan, no place to stay, no job. All she’d had was her
suitcase and a head filled with all the critical things Doug had said to her over
the course of their marriage and that final day in the kitchen.
He’d said she was nothing without him.
And as she’d sat in Sam’s guest room one night, trying to put together a resume to
apply for jobs and feeling sorry for herself, she’d realized the bastard had been
right on some level. Since she’d met Doug in high school, her entire existence had
been centered around being who he wanted her to be. Being what
everyone
wanted her to be. For Doug, it was the doting girlfriend. For her classmates, it
was the bubbly, popular cheerleader. For her foster parents, it was the girl who never
broke the rules and went to church with them every Sunday.
She’d been a master chameleon without ever realizing it. It’d kept her from being
moved to yet another home. It’d kept her safe from the vicious bullying in high school.
It’d given her a way to secure a future with a man who would take care of her. She’d
never be that little girl left alone and scared again.
Only the whole plan had been built out of Popsicle sticks. She’d counted on someone
else for her happiness and security. A fatal mistake. How had she ever let herself
be so stupid as to trust someone again? Her mother had said she’d always be there,
and look how that had turned out.
As Tessa had stared at that blinking cursor, she’d made a decision. Never would she
let herself depend on anyone else again. She would survive on her own. She’d done
it for years as a kid. She could do it now. And she wouldn’t just make it through;
she’d transform. Thrive. She’d vowed that by the end of the year, a resume of her
life would no longer be a stark blank page. She would take those insults Doug had
hurled at her and use them as fuel, not just to find a job but to tackle every facet
of her life. She’d prove that she was more than the trophy wife she’d let herself
become.
But that plan had not included dating. Sex, maybe. Eventually. She didn’t plan to
enter the convent and abstain for the rest of her life. But dating and getting any
emotional entanglements would only send her sliding backward. “Sam, I’m not ready
to date. You know that.”
Sam sighed and linked her arm with Tessa’s, leading her to the register. “So just
come for the food and cooking lesson then. The whole point of these meet-ups is that
it’s a no-pressure environment. And we’re getting sangria and a fancy meal
for free.
How long has it been since you’ve had a chance to eat in a restaurant that doesn’t
serve food wrapped in greasy paper?”
Tessa groaned. “Don’t remind me.”
One of the main reasons she was interested in cooking classes in the first place was
because she missed the delicious meals Doug’s housekeeper used to prepare for them
and all the gourmet restaurants she and Doug had gone to regularly. If she had to
eat another bowl of canned soup, she might stab herself with a spoon. But she didn’t
have the income to fund nice restaurants anymore. So if she wanted to eat something
that wasn’t frozen or canned, she was going to have to learn how to cook it herself.
Sam swiped her credit card and took her bag from the cashier. “Exactly. Barcelona
is one of the hottest restaurants around. This is your chance for a major treat. The
only sacrifice is that you’ll have to make small talk with a stranger who happens
to have a penis. Big deal.”
Tessa sighed, her ability to fight against Sam’s hopeful gaze crumbling. Sam had good
intentions, even if they were misguided. And really, what was a little awkward small
talk with someone Tessa would never see again when there was free sangria to be had?
“You’re lucky I’m a sucker for tapas.”
Sam’s face broke into a grin, and she pulled out the lip gloss to give it to Tessa.
“Gloss up, babe. Let’s go cook some shrimp and break some hearts.”
* * *
When Tessa walked through the doors of Barcelona, it
was like walking through a portal to a world she wasn’t a native of anymore. Soft
Spanish music played, the scent of exotic spices drifted through the air, and the
saffron-colored walls flickered with the dancing light of candlelit tables. Every
detail screamed trendy elegance and money. As did most of the guests sitting at the
tables. She could almost see her old self sitting among them, wineglass in hand, diamonds
sparkling at her throat, her husband sitting across from her telling her about the
latest acquisition he was working on. Anyone looking at them would’ve been envious.
But seeing the image in her mind’s eye now showed a picture that was warped and tarnished.
An illusion. The conversation would’ve been one-sided because Tessa had never understood
Doug’s business speak. The diamond choker around her neck would’ve probably been a
guilt gift he’d given her after one of his affairs. And the wine would’ve been her
attempt at getting in the mood for the lackluster sex they’d have later that night.
She didn’t miss this world.
And she didn’t miss that woman.
“Hello, ladies, do you have a reservation?” the host asked.
Sam stepped forward. “We’re here for the cooking class.”
“Ah, yes,” he said, his smile welcoming. “Follow me. You’ll be in the banquet room.”
The host led them through the main dining area and then through a short hallway and
another set of doors. The banquet room looked much like the other side of the restaurant,
but the lights weren’t as low and there were tables set up around the perimeter with
cooking equipment and little bowls of ingredients. In the center of the room, there
were smaller, more intimate tables where they’d presumably eat their meal after learning
how to prepare it. Pitchers of sangria gleamed ruby red on each table. A number of
people were already sitting at the small tables, mingling and drinking. The tinkling
sounds of nervous, first-date laughter mixed in with the music.
Tessa’s stomach did a flip, and she almost turned to leave. Sam put a hand on Tessa’s
arm, as if reading her unspoken intention, and guided her forward. “Don’t chicken
out now.”
A man with a clipboard near the entrance grinned brightly. “Welcome to the meet-up
ladies. I’m Jim, your event liaison for the night. Names?”
“I’m Samantha Dunbar, and this is Tessa McAllen.”
Jim scanned the clipboard, nodding. “Ms. Dunbar, your perfect match is Cory Heath,
table five. He’s already here if you’d like to head over and say hi. We’re letting
everyone chat and enjoy their drinks for a few minutes before the class starts. Break
the ice, you know?”
“Sure,” Sam said, peeking over at the dark-haired guy at table five, scanning him
from head to loafer. “Sounds good.”
But Tessa’s brain snagged. “Wait a second. I thought we were just mingling with everyone?”
Jim smiled. “Oh, no, ma’am. Perfect Match is full service. We took the profile you
sent us and matched you up with someone compatible for the evening. No use wasting
time on people you have nothing in common with, right?”
“The
profile
I sent in?” Tessa asked, shooting daggers at Sam.
Sam sent her a please-don’t-kill-me look and gave Tessa’s hand a squeeze. “Just try
to have a good time, okay? I promise, it’s no big deal. It’ll be fun.”
With that, Sam hurried off toward her “perfect match.” Tessa had to fight hard not
to lose it right there. Not only was she going to have to manage a date with a stranger,
but said stranger would be under the impression that they’d been matched together.
And God only knew what Sam had put in Tessa’s profile. She cringed at the thought.
Jim was scanning his list again, and Tessa smoothed the front of her dress. She hadn’t
thought to put much effort into her outfit tonight. This was supposed to be a cooking
class, after all. So she’d simply stayed in the black wrap dress she’d worn to work.
But now she felt plain and out of place. Everyone else had put on their A-game ensemble
for date night.
God, why was she even worrying about it?
This isn’t a real date.
She’d been trained by Doug to look her best at all times because you never knew who
you’d run into, and sometimes that old urge was hard to shake. But she wasn’t here
to impress anyone. She was here to drink sangria and to learn how to cook. That’s
it.
The door opened behind her as more people came in.
“Ms. McAllen?” Jim asked, a small frown curving his thin lips as he lifted his gaze
from the clipboard. “Do you have your confirmation number with you? You’re not showing
on my list.”
“My what?” She automatically put her hand on her purse, but knew she had nothing of
the sort in there. “No. My friend set all this up for us both.”
“Hmm.” Jim tapped his pencil on the clipboard. “Well, I’m not showing you on here,
which means we don’t have confirmation of your payment. If you’d like to pay the fee
now, we can let you stay for the class. Then if you find your confirmation, we’ll
refund you. But since you weren’t on the list, we won’t have a match set up for you.
You’d just be staying for the cooking portion unless we have any other walk-ins.”
No match sounded like a fantastic idea. Maybe this was a blessing in disguise. “How
much is it?”
“Two hundred dollars.”
A gasp escaped her lips. Two hundred dollars? She should’ve expected it, but the number
still caught her off guard. And it was a number she couldn’t fund. “I’m sorry. I’ll
just have to find out what happened to my original fee and do this another time. Maybe
I can talk to my friend and see if she has the information.”
He smiled kindly, but she saw it in his eyes. He knew she was bailing because she
didn’t have the money. “Of course.”
Shame tried to edge in, heating her cheeks. But she swallowed it back. She would not
get teary over missing some stupid cooking class. She took a step to head toward Sam’s
table, hoping that even though they were technically party crashers, her friend had
some magical confirmation number. But before she could move forward, a warm hand touched
her elbow.
“I’ll cover the fee.”
The rich timbre of the man’s voice rolled over Tessa like sun-heated ocean water.
She stiffened at the contact and her body’s unexpected visceral reaction. She spun
around, her gaze going up, up, up, and finally colliding with clear blue eyes and
a face made for Greek sculpture. Her brain forgot to form words.
“I’d hate for you to miss one of the best meals of your life because of a computer
glitch,” the man said, a ghost of a smile touching his lips.
Tessa simply stared back. The way he held her gaze had her thoughts scattering and
her brain reaching for some memory she couldn’t quite grab hold of. She shook her
head, breaking the gaze and trying to clear her head.
No
. This stranger was offering to pay two hundred dollars for her to eat. She knew how
that worked. She’d played that game before. “Really, that’s very kind of you to offer.
But I’ll just come back another time.”