Changing Traditions, A Christmas Novella (8 page)

And so diary, it seems as though this Christmas has been the
best one so far! Though we are missing our Henry, nothing could
possibly be better. Seated around the table, I realize how blessed
I truly am. Everyone is laughing and the dinner has proved much
different than our one at Thanksgiving. Carolyn and Scott even
announced that they are expecting a baby sometime in early spring.
What absolute wonderfulness! Laura is in much brighter spirits and
I believe that deep down she is falling for her doctor. She says
that he, Dr. Luke, and Katie are stopping by later this evening and
she couldn’t be happier.

Adam and Rosie are running
around and Adam is reveling in all the presents that he has
received. This Christmas is a big deal for a little boy born during
the war. How I wish that situation could have been exchanged for
him.

And now I have my Jeremy
beside me. He enjoyed a Christmas dinner with us and was even a
part of Laura’s skit. I feel as though everyone is glad to see him
here and I feel as though he has fit in wonderfully. Jeremy left
for his family’s dinner for a bit, but now he is back to take me on
a sleigh ride. I shall have to write more later. But I feel as
though I couldn’t be happier than I am right now.

“
Bethany! Jeremy’s back!”
Laura’s voice carried up to the loft and she quickly put her diary
away before hurrying down.

Bethany couldn’t contain
the smile that spread across her face as she spotted Jeremy at the
door.

His appeared to match
hers. “Ready to go, Beth?”

“
Always,” she grabbed her
shawl and before heading out, turned to say good-bye. Poppa and
Momma stood there with strange smiles on their faces and Laura
looked ready to burst. Thinking that everyone was just happy,
Bethany left without thinking anymore about it.

As she sat in the sleigh
with Jeremy, Bethany slid her arm through his. “Have I told you
that I am so happy I’m here with you?”

Jeremy laughed as he
looked down at her. “You might have mentioned it once or
twice.”

“
Well, I am exceedingly
happy to be here with you. There, now I’ve said it three times.
Which tops you. I don’t think you uttered it once.”

“
I suppose I should change
that then,” but instead of echoing her words, Jeremy remained
quiet. She wondered what he could possibly mean, but right now, she
was content to just sit with him in the silence as the snow began
fluttering to the ground.

“
It’s snowing, Jeremy, on
Christmas. I love that.” Bethany closed her eyes, feeling the snow
fall on her face. A cold blast of air surrounded her and when she
opened her eyes, she realized that Jeremy was now facing her in the
sleigh and not just sitting next to her.

Jeremy clasped both of her
hands in his, “I know we haven’t been courting long, but I’ve long
since told you how long I’ve known you. But coming to this
conclusion, I just feel that it is as right as anytime and I even
had a chance to talk to your father before bringing you out here.”
Bethany looked up and saw that they were right at the lake. The ice
glistened over the water making it look picturesque.

Now, Jeremy was urging her
from the sleigh until they were both standing in the snow. Bethany
gave a slight shiver, “What are you up to, Jeremy?”

“
You’ll see,” with a
twinkle in his eye, Jeremy went to one knee, still clasping one of
her hands. “I am exceedingly happy that I am here with you and I
don’t ever want to be anywhere else. I promise I’ll love you
forever. Marry me, Bethany Woodsmall. Say you’ll be my girl
forever.” He withdrew a ring from his pocket, and though it was
simpler than what Albert’s might have been, Bethany couldn’t
imagine wearing anything else.

“
Yes, oh yes, I’ll marry
you! And I love you too!” As Jeremy slid the ring on her finger,
Bethany fell in his arms before he had a chance to get out of the
snow. Now, this Christmas couldn’t have been any better.

Carolyn’s Diary

January 12,
1855

Dear Diary,

Around lunchtime, it
started snowing pretty hard and around supper when I went out to do
the barn chores, it was turning into a real blizzard. I kept Laura
inside with Bethy when I went out, for I didn't need to worry about
her. As I went, I took a rope with me that attached to the main
house. I was quite relieved when I finally reached the barn door
and pushed it open. It was warm in the barn, most likely from all
the animals. Still, it took me twice as long to do the chores since
there was no one to help me.

As I was putting hay in
the horses' feed trough, the door flew open. A tall figure stood in
the doorway. I gave a small scream and grabbed the pitchfork, which
was right next to me.

The figure came closer
with his hands in the air. "Relax, Carolyn, it's only me." It was
Scott Harp.

With a sigh of relief, I
lowered my pitchfork, "You know, you shouldn't scare people like
that."

He gave a small laugh. "I
reckon not."

I continued my job at
hand. "So, what are you doing here? I would have thought that Luke
would've told you that Jesse wasn't here."

Scott started filling
another trough with hay, "He did, but we both thought that it would
be good for someone to check up on you girls."

I turned to him. "We don't
need checking up on, and besides, with a blizzard, there is no need
for anyone to put their lives at risk."

Scott stopped what he was
doing and looked my way. "Then just let the barn alone and stay
inside and I won't come anymore."

That was ridiculous. "I
can't do that! They'll die out here. What would Poppa and Jesse say
when they return and all their animals are dead?"

"They'll say that at least
you and the girls were safe. Just think if you were to get lost out
here. How would the girls find you?"

"My sentiments exactly,
which is why I have a rope hanging from the house to the barn. And
you do not, so you should get home before you get lost."

"Carolyn..."

"The blizzard might be
over tomorrow anyway. There is no sense in arguing this." I walked
over to the door and swung it open. There was nothing but absolute
whiteness out there. I couldn't even see the rope hanging in front
of me. I grabbed some pieces of wood before I grabbed to the rope
with one hand. I turned then to look at Scott who was just standing
there, watching me with a face that showed he disapproved. I tried
to smile, but none would come. "Please shut the door when you
leave." Then I left, out into the whiteness all alone. The wind was
so strong that I lost all of my wood pieces, but I didn't stop for
them. I could hold the rope easier now with two hands, though it
was swinging rapidly back and forth.

Finally, I stumbled upon
the steps. Crawling up, I pushed the door open and collapsed inside
the house.

"Carolyn!" Bethy screamed
upon my entrance. She and Laura pulled me in and settled me by the
fire. It took me this long to get here, how would Scott possibly
get home?

Bethany’s Diary

November 16, 1857

Dear Diary,

Today would have been
Momma’s birthday. It has been three years since cholera invaded our
house and Momma died. Carolyn seemed extra touchy, and she spent
most of the day out at Momma’s grave. Poppa seems much happier
since Momma Hannah’s been here. I believe that it is because we
were always missing someone but now the “Momma” void has been
filled. Momma can never be replaced, but Momma Hannah helps take
our mind off of what we lost.

After we were all in bed,
I could hear Carolyn crying from the next bed. Laura was asleep
beside me, and I’m pretty sure the boys were too on the other side
of the loft. I slipped out of bed and crawled in next to
Carolyn.

She turned over to me. “Is
everything all right, Bethy?”

“I was going to ask you
the same thing.”

I heard her sigh and
several moments of silence passed between us before she spoke
again. “How can you be all right with Momma not here? And Hannah?
You and Laura call her ‘Momma Hannah’ like it makes no difference
to you. I’m trying, Bethy, really, and I thought I was finally
getting over Momma’s death. But now…” I could feel her crying
beside me again.

What was I to do? Carolyn
had never come to me asking for advice before. I lay my head on her
shoulder. “I think you just need to open your heart and love Hannah
for who she is. No one will ever replace Momma in our hearts, and
I’m not all right with Momma not being here. I miss her terribly,
but I think you will find that the pain ceases when you come to
accept Hannah as another Momma.”

Carolyn didn’t say
anything for the longest time, and at first, I thought I had hurt
her feelings. Instead she leaned over and kissed my forehead. “When
did you become so wise, Bethy dear? I will try to love Hannah as
her own person, truly I will. You would’ve thought that after a
year, I would have. It just takes me a long time.”

We quieted down then to go
to sleep, but I could feel my mind going a hundred different
directions. Did I “forget” Momma too easily? Should I still be
holding on to the pain of losing her and not have accepted Momma
Hannah so quickly? I feel I have no answers for my questions and I
didn’t want to disturb Carolyn to ask her.

Laura’s Diary

Friday, August 3, 1860

I am not a writer. I much
prefer playing out of doors with my brothers than any inside task
my sisters or Momma require of me. For whatever reason, my sisters
believe that because they enjoy writing in a diary, I would as
well. And now I am jumping ahead of myself. How Carolyn would scold
me if she read this!

My name is Laura Anne
Woodsmall. Today is my thirteenth birthday, which explains the gift
of the diary from my sisters. Here I was, hoping for something like
a horse to ride or seeds for my garden, but no. My sisters, Carolyn
and Bethany, adore traditions. Carolyn is always reminding us of
this tradition or that tradition. She and Bethany both received
diaries for their thirteenth birthday and thus assumed that I would
like one as well.

When I told Carolyn my
worries, her eyes just danced. "Dear Laura. Stop being so
pessimistic. You don't have to write in it every day. Besides you
may enjoy it."

"Not everyone is a writer
like you, Carolyn," I countered, which brought laughter from the
rest of my family.

Bethany gave me a hug,
"Not to worry. You won't turn into a writer, but please, try to
think positively about it."

And I am. I am trying to
think as Carolyn or Bethany would, but I find that I am not like
them in any way. I even asked Bethany what she wrote in her diary,
because I was afraid I didn't have anything to write about. She
only told me that I would find my own style. Well, that wasn’t very
helpful.