Lifting the horn to his lips, Gabriel blew out a long, plaintive note. I knew the sound could carry great distances and would be impossible to ignore for any of the heavenly host. Heck, it made me want to move closer to him and I was only a few feet away. The sound had a profound effect on Bunny though. She wrinkled her face up and screamed bloody murder.
As I tucked her up against my neck and patted her back soothingly, Gabriel blew his horn again. Angels began to descend, alone and in pairs until the clearing was full of every angel in that part of the world. Gabriel remained still until satisfied there were enough of us to bear witness to the sentence.
“Please, Gabriel.” Nathanael licked his lips, and I felt a measure of satisfaction in seeing him squirm on the ground like that. “I shall repent, you need not cast me from Heaven.”
“Talk about the punishment fitting the crime,” Adam smirked, and I saw Sam nod in approval.
“Can he do that? Kick him out of Heaven?” I whispered and Sam nodded.
“Oh yes, if he’s been given dispensation by God to cast Nathanael among the Fallen, any archangel may deliver His judgment.”
“Nice,” I nodded, hiding my smile behind the baby’s blanket as I held her close. Luckily, she settled down as soon as Gabriel quit blowing on his horn.
Nathanael’s head bowed as he was forced to deliver his own sentence to the crowd assembled. “Let all who gather here bear witness to my shame. I am cast out of His favor, cast out of Heaven, never again to dwell among my brethren. Hereafter I shall seek my shelter among men, joining the Fallen for all eternity.”
His head lifted and Nathanael met Gabriel’s gaze squarely. “I take full responsibility for my actions and humbly accept His justice. Pray do not judge my brothers as I have been judged. I led them to believe I acted upon His orders, but it was my own selfish desires I sought to fulfill. It was I who sent the Angel of Death to kill the Bringer of Life, and it was I who sought to absent the child from the world. I ask no mercy for myself, and stand ready to accept my fate.”
“Did he just say…?” I started to ask Sam, but he shook his head. It wasn’t the time for words, but I couldn’t help but reel over Nathanael’s confession.
He
was the one who send Raziel to kill me? Did that mean I wasn’t in God’s bad books after all?
Gabriel laid a hand on Nathanael’s head, almost like a benediction, but for the sorrow in his eyes. “So let it be done,” he said softly. His hand began to glow and Nathanael’s entire body grew rigid as though in terrible pain. I thought I could watch it, but I didn’t like to see anyone suffer, even the man who’d never treated me with anything but disdain.
Tuning away, I saw Adam’s jaw tighten and Sam stared at the ground. No doubt they were remembering their own similar experience and I figured it must be awful even thousands of years later. Reaching for Adam’s hand, I gave it a squeeze and he looked away from the spectacle, eyes haunted. Sending him soothing Grace, I saw some of the tension leave his jaw and he offered me a sad smile.
When I looked back to the center of the clearing, Gabriel had released Nathanael and the new Fallen lay panting on the ground, broken.
“His will be done,” the angels chanted as one.
Gabriel approached us, his face solemn, and I felt Adam stiffen beside me, but the archangel’s expression softened as he looked down at Eve. Gently, he touched the dark fuzz on top of her head, his mouth splitting into a wide smile when she yawned. “Your journey is just beginning, I think. Love her well and all will be as it should.”
“So… I’m really not in trouble with God? He doesn’t want to kill me or the baby?”
Gabriel only smiled and launched himself up in the air, taking to the sky. About half of the angels immediately followed suit, the others staying behind to help heal the wounded. A few approached offering their apologies, Davael among them, and I mumbled thanks, not sure what to say to someone who’d been hell bent on taking my child not a half hour before. Neither Sam nor Adam seemed to think twice about it, taking the apologies in stride.
The boys looked like they wanted to stay a bit longer, maybe feeling deprived of angelic company for a while, so I let them visit for a few minutes. I retreated to the cave to change the baby with the supplies I found, satisfying my curiosity that she really was unhurt by the ordeal. I found ten perfect fingers and ten perfect toes with everything in between looking completely normal, as far as I could tell. Apart from the golden glow she looked like any other newborn, no scaly patches or other monstrous features.
Sam joined me as I was wrapping her up like a big burrito the way they’d shown us at the child birth class to make her feel secure like she did in the womb. “Is your reunion almost over? ‘Cause I’d like to get this little sucker home and get her something to eat soon.” I had no idea what they’d been feeding her so far, there might be cans of formula among the supplies, or they could have used wild goat’s milk for all I knew. Maybe she didn’t even need to eat with both my and Adam’s Grace to sustain her, but she looked hungry when I touched her cheek.
“We can go now if you like, Nathanael has fled.”
“Thank God for that, huh?” I breathed a sigh of relief, taking the baby into my arms again. “I’m thinking that was a pretty rare thing we witnessed, right?”
“Indeed,” Sam agreed. “It’s nothing to be taken lightly. Once one joins the ranks of the Fallen, there is no going back.”
I could tell it was a sore subject with him, and I tried changing it. “You know, I didn’t think Gabriel could actually talk,” I mentioned. “I thought he was a mute or a telepath or something.”
“You heard Gabriel speak?” Sam blinked in surprise. “You heard actual words?”
“Yes, didn’t you? When he did the thing with Nathanael and then when he came over to talk to me? You were standing right there.”
“You’re the new Clarion.”
“The what?”
“The Clarion. You alone speak for Gabriel when words are needed. Nathanael was the Clarion and clearly, Gabriel chose you to succeed him. That is so kewlies!” His face broke into a wide grin.
“Wait… so, I have to go to all those angel meetings and talk for him and stuff?” How come he hadn’t said anything about that or asked me if it was something I’d be interested in doing?
“It is a high honor to be chosen as Clarion. You should feel very flattered.”
“You guys ready to blow this popsicle stand?” Adam poked his head in. “I could use a hot shower and a week’s vacation right about now.”
“Sounds good to me.” I agreed whole heartedly, shifting my hold on Bunny as I left the cave. I was nervous about carrying her while I flew, but at the same time I didn’t want to give her up to anyone else to carry either. “Are you sure she’ll be able to travel so fast without being hurt?”
“Hey, she’s our kid, right? That means she’s tougher than she looks,” Adam grinned, offering his thumb to her little fingers which promptly wrapped around it. “See, she’s got the death grip down.”
“She should be well protected in any case. Even a normal human could survive the journey, though likely a bit of travel sickness would result,” Sam considered aloud.
“So, what do you say, Mercy? I’m betting Fiji’s looking pretty good right about now, isn’t it?” Adam waggled his brows at me and I hated to kill his playful mood, but there was only one place I wanted to go at the moment.
“I think I’d rather go home, where I belong.”
Chapter Twenty-Nine
Life goes on after you beat the bad guy.
You think life will go back to normal, but what
is
normal? Adversity changes you and it’s not always easy to change back.
Though the rational side of my brain knew Bunny wasn’t in danger anymore, I found it hard to relax my guard. It was like I was afraid to put her down for more than two minutes at a time. I didn’t sleep well. Maybe it was because I didn’t strictly need sleep anymore, or maybe it was nerves, I don’t know. I could only hope it would pass in time.
Nelo helped Parker recreate a pretty close match of the nursery, but there were a few things they didn’t think to get like a baby bath or a diaper bag, little things that weren’t readily apparent to the uninitiated. I didn’t mind the excuse to shop so much, especially when I found that Adam had Finch transfer a chunk of money directly into my bank account since I hadn’t touched his. I rationalized using the money for things Bunny needed, especially since I hadn’t gone back to work yet. In addition to the money, Finch helped get Bunny’s birth certificate in order since I had no record of ever being pregnant or giving birth at the hospital. Sure, I could have said I’d given birth at home, but it seemed simpler to let him handle it. (It did chap my hide to have to pay my high deductible for the stupid tonsillectomy I never had, by the way.)
Parker… he tried really hard, I could tell, but I know it overwhelmed him to have an infant in the house. Being a new parent is hard under the best of circumstances, and without much time to get used to the idea, he struggled with the realities of caring for a baby day in and day out.
It helped that he loved me and I could tell that he was charmed by Bunny most days. For her part, Bunny was an easy baby to love. Generally cheerful with a sweet disposition, she slept well and only cried when she needed attention. But did he allow her completely into his heart? I think something held him back from accepting her as his own.
Adam stayed away.
Before we parted, I repeated my offer to include him in her life if he chose to be involved, but he never gave me his answer. I think it hurt him too much to be around us and not completely
with
us. Not that he ever offered to make any kind of commitment with me beyond the crack about Fiji. For all I knew he still only wanted a fling in the Ether. At the end of the day I couldn’t make a commitment with him, that trust just wasn’t there.
Sam stopped by to visit every now and again, but only when he knew Daphne wouldn’t be around. I was glad he hadn’t cut himself off completely from all of us. I
knew
he’d been to see Daphne, only not revealing himself to her, and I knew it couldn’t be healthy for him in the long run. Then again, who was I to tell anyone how to love? My own relationships were notoriously screwy.
All the time I found myself daydreaming, wondering if I’d made the right choice in not trying to work things out with Adam for Bunny’s sake. Or if things between Parker and I would ever be the same again with that chunk of shared memories missing. But mostly I was too busy learning how to be a mother to dwell on it much. It wasn’t paradise, but it was enough.
Gradually I stopped watching Bunny like a hawk, coming to accept she wouldn’t disappear if I turned my head. I even left her with Parker to go visit Ben once a week. Sadly, Annaliese’s coven hadn’t been able to restore his mind and the regular doctors hadn’t made a dent in cracking his psychosis. True to his word, Adam put him up in the swankiest private sanitarium money could buy.
We didn’t talk much when I came to visit, mostly because Ben didn’t make much sense, but he always seemed happy to see me. As a rule, he liked to stack checkers and I watched, over and over again until they toppled and he picked up the pieces and started again. I brought him a box of Legos once, thinking he might enjoy building with them, but all he did was use the box as a base to stack his checkers on.
One day a few weeks after I started coming to visit him, I was surprised to find a man sitting with him when I arrived. Ben studiously ignored his visitor, his attention wholly focused on the growing tower of checkers. I thought about leaving to come back another time, but curiosity got the better of me. Especially when I saw his visitor was none other than the archangel, Gabriel.
“Fancy meeting you here,” he smiled when I approached. Once again I was struck by the sound of his voice, deep and even as though he spoke all the time. Hell, he could have done TV voiceovers, his voice was that smooth.
“Fancy meeting you anywhere,” I replied, taking a seat at the table. “Do you come to visit Ben often, or is this a special occasion?”
“Actually, I came to see you and I thought you might appreciate it if I approached you here rather than in your home.”
I thought that over and figured he was probably right. I might have gotten a little defensive if he’d appeared in my bedroom, angel style. “I do appreciate that, thanks. Did you need to talk to me about something in particular, or is this about one of those Clarion things?”
“I came to make you a proposal of sorts.”
The mind boggled. I couldn’t even begin to fathom what someone like him might propose. “Okay, I’m listening,” I said carefully.
“Merceline, you have been greatly wronged since you were first touched with Grace, and it has been suggested that reparations of sorts might be in order.”
“Reparations?” I blinked. And here I thought he wanted to ask me to do something for him. “Suggested by who?”
His eyes went skyward before they returned to me. “Indeed. What would you have me do to set your world to rights?”
“What are we talking about here exactly? Are you saying you could reverse what Nathanael did to Bunny?” I wouldn’t have to keep explaining why I suddenly had a baby to people, and my mom might get over her sulk at me having “kept her own grandbaby a secret” from her.
“It can be done if you so choose. Would you have me return things as they were before he altered the fabric of reality? Set them back on course?”
“You can really do that?”
“If that is what you desire to set your world to rights,” he nodded earnestly.
Set my world to rights. What was right? A future with Parker or Adam? If I could rewind the cosmic tape recorder how far could I go back? How far did I want to go back? “Wow, that’s… that’s quite an offer.” I let out a long breath. “Do I have to decide right this moment?”
“Not at all,” Gabriel smiled with a kindly pat to my hand. “Take all the time you need. You have only to call me when you decide.”