Chompin' at the Bit (Horse Play #2) (42 page)

That
was what she meant when she said it was too soon to tell anyone? Had I ever misinterpreted that. Kaylie really had fucked me up.

Madison turned to face me again, her tears gone—hopefully for good. “We can tell them, though, if that’s what you want. I realize now how selfish it was of me to ask you to keep it a secret given everything you’ve been through.”

“If it makes you more comfortable to wait, then we’ll wait. I’m sorry for thinking the worst,” I told her.

“Only if you’re sure, Jensen,” she said, her eyebrows raised and pulled together. “I don’t want this to be the source of anymore discord between us.”

“It won’t be,” I assured her. “Now that I understand why you wanted to wait, I can see your point.” Feeling the need to show her with more than words just how happy I was that we had been able to discuss our feelings with each other, I leaned in for a kiss.

Before my lips could make contact though, Madison turned her head away from me and pulled herself out of my arms. “I’m sorry. I’m still just kind of … reeling, you know?” It physically pained me when she started for the door, and she must have sensed my unease because she turned to me. “I’m just going for a walk. I need some time to think about everything. I’ll stay on the grounds. I promise.”

Even though I didn’t want her to go anywhere, I nodded, hoping to show her a little of that trust that I seemed to have been lacking earlier. “Okay. I’ll be here.” Just as she moved for the hall again, I called out to her. “Madison?” She turned back, meeting my nervous-as-fuck stare. “Are we okay?”

The right side of her mouth turned up, and she nodded. “We will be …” She paused, looking at the floor and then back at me on her bed. “I’ll be back in a bit.”

Inhaling a deep breath, I smiled. “I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

I remained frozen as Madison disappeared from the doorway. Time didn’t seem to matter as I lay on her bed, staring up at the ceiling. I wasn’t thinking of anything in particular, just running our conversation over and over in my mind. It wasn’t until Bones whimpered that I turned to find him with his paws up on the bed, his head resting on them as he looked at me.

“How’s it going, pal?” I asked him, causing him to perk his ears forward. I scratched his head and it lolled to one side, his eyes closing as he seemed to enjoy the affection. “Come on,” I ushered quietly, pushing myself off the bed and heading for the door. “Let’s go and start on dinner before Mama gets back.”

Forty-five minutes later, dinner was ready and Madison was still nowhere to be seen. I tried not to worry, but I couldn’t help it. Instead of letting dinner get cold, I put the food in the oven’s warming drawer and decided to do a bit of light tidying to keep from focusing on when she’d return.

I wandered through the house, picking up Bones’ toys that he’d left lying in the middle of the living room or halfway down the hall before grabbing our hamper and taking it to the laundry room. After putting a load in, I went back to our bedroom to tidy up a bit more. The room seemed a little stuffy, so I opened the window to let the cool fall breeze in while I cleaned.

Madison still wasn’t home by the time I finished, and I had to fight every impulse I had to call her and make sure she was all right. I checked the clock and realized that Madison had been gone for over an hour. While I wanted to give her the space she needed, I also needed to be sure she was okay. Just as I picked up my phone, the front door swung open.

“I’m back,” Madison announced.

I wanted to race to her, but I didn’t. I waited for her to come to me. “Dinner’s warming in the oven.” Turning toward the stove, I grabbed the oven mitts, removed the two dishes from the oven, and set them on the stovetop.

“Smells amazing,” Madison said, her soft voice right behind me. I didn’t even get a chance to turn and face her before I felt her arms wrap securely around my waist.

Basking in her affection, I placed my right hand over hers and held her there a moment longer before I patted it and twisted in her embrace, forcing her hands to rest loose on my hips. Something had changed from the time she left the house until now; she definitely seemed happier, yet still a little timid about something.

Ensnaring her waist, I tentatively leaned forward, our eyes locked the entire time, and pressed a gentle kiss to her lips. I could feel her smile against my mouth, and I felt an overwhelming sense of relief as I wrapped her in a tight embrace and exhaled. “How was your walk?” I asked.

“It was fine. Thank you.”

I wanted to tell her it was no trouble, but that would have been a lie. Instead, I just nodded. “Come on, let’s eat.”

A moment of calm fell over us as we took a few bites of our dinner, occasionally looking up into one another’s eyes and silently admiring each other. As we ate, I remembered her gift to me; there were really no words to express just how much I appreciated the gesture, but I was sure as hell going to try.

“Thank you, by the way.” I inwardly rolled my eyes at myself for just how lame my gratitude sounded.

“For what?” Madison said, lifting her eyes to mine.

“My gift,” I explained. “I really don’t deserve it after tonight.”

“True,” she said, her lips fighting a cheeky grin. “But I’m sure you’d have redeemed yourself.”

“It was a lucky guess … figuring out what my favorite book was.” The grin that she finally allowed to appear on her face was one I had seen before: she had outside help. “How did you know?”

She shrugged. “Your sister.” I was stunned, and I was pretty sure that was evident by the way my mouth fell open. “Oh, I didn’t tell her. I said I was thinking of Christmas gifts already.”

I chuckled. “And she bought that? I’m a little disappointed by her naïveté.”

“I don’t know,” Madison said, sounding serious again. “I’m sure she suspects something. There was something in the way she told me how perfect the gift was that had me questioning if she hasn’t known for a couple of weeks. She and Willow were far too interested in what was going on between us while camping.”

We finished our dinner before I started cleaning up—I had a lot of making up to do, and I intended to do whatever I could to make sure I did it right. After suggesting Madison retire to the living room, I did the dishes and wiped the counters before sweeping the floor. When the kitchen was in pristine order, I found Madison sitting on the couch. Her legs were tucked to the side with Bones nestled into the crook of her knees. She was awake, but barely.

Grinning so wide my cheeks started to hurt, I walked forward and joined her, pulling her into my side. Madison snuggled in a little closer, her hand coming up to clutch my shirt as I draped an arm around her. There seemed to be something in the way she was holding onto me that told me she was upset.

“Love? Is something on your mind?” I asked softly.

Madison didn’t move except when she inhaled deeply and sighed. “I stopped by to see Dad when I went out for my walk.”

“Oh?” Hearing that she went over to see her father caused me to panic a little—okay, a lot. While I felt good about airing things out between us, I knew she would still be upset. Had she told Wayne about the fight? If so, did that mean she told him about the pregnancy?

“Yeah. It wasn’t originally my intention, but I just kind of found myself there.” She took another deep breath. “I didn’t tell him about the pregnancy yet; I figured we should do that together. But he knew something was wrong, and I told him that you and I had a fight.”

The man was going to kill me. The day I found out that he knew about us, he told me never to hurt her, and I had done just that. Yeah, it was pretty much guaranteed that I was going to incur his wrath in the very near future.

“He suggested some time away,” Madison said in a voice so quiet I almost didn’t hear her.

My fear was momentarily forgotten, and I laughed softly, feeling a little relief. “Baby, we’ve already taken advantage of his generosity and taken so much time away. I don’t know—”

Madison pushed herself up, looking nervous as she tucked her pale hair behind her ear. “No,” she interrupted. “Just me.”

“For how long?” I asked, trying to keep the hurt from my face when she turned to look at me.

“I’m guessing a couple of days?” I had to drop my eyes. I couldn’t hide my true feelings any more. She shifted against me before saying, “I’m not going, though. I can’t. Not after everythi—”

I interrupted her, wondering if maybe she needed this so much that her father had seen it before we had. “Maybe he’s right?”

Madison shook her head firmly. “No. He’s not. Jensen, we just made a huge breakthrough in our relationship, and I’m not going to risk taking four giant leaps back over something like
running away
.”

“Madison, I know I can trust you,” I whispered softly, my voice unsteady as I tried to convince myself.

“And I know you want to, but can you honestly tell me that if I went away for even a
day
you wouldn’t be out of your mind with worry?”

There was a beat of silence where we just stared at each other. “Madi, I know I’ve been pretty overbearing these last couple weeks,” I said with a small smile.

“You had your reasons, and I shouldn’t have been so closed-minded to miss the signs. I was so wrapped up in my own shit that I failed to acknowledge how my behavior was affecting you. It won’t happen again. I won’t let it.”

My expression softened, and my smile widened. “You realize what’s happening right now, right?” I asked, causing her to drop her hands to her lap and look at me with a puzzled expression on her face. “We’re
talking
. Pretty big step, don’t you think?”

She shrugged flippantly, almost like she was pretending it was no big deal. “If you say so.” The smile that slid across her face gave her away.

“Always a smart ass, huh?” I teased. “Seriously though, I want to thank you for talking to me about this instead of just doing it. I really appreciate it. Can you do me one favor?” She nodded. “Take tomorrow.”

“What do you mean?” she asked, slightly confused.

“Tell Wayne you won’t be in for work—I’ll cover your workload. Go get a massage, shop, do whatever it is you need to in order to unwind. The only thing I’ll ask is that you be home for dinner,” I explained, my tone wavering slightly between conviction and doubt.

“Will you be able to handle that? I don’t want to cause any undue stress on you.”

Sighing, I turned to face Madison completely. Bones decided we were both far too restless and hopped onto the floor before heading outside. “Madison, I need you to do this. I’m not saying I won’t have my moments, but I think it will be good for both of us. I need to learn how to let go of my past, and you need some alone time. I think this is the best way to accomplish both of those things. Please?”

“I just don’t know if
now’s
the time to be messing around with something like that.”

“Baby,” I whispered, cupping Madison’s slender face in my hands this time. “I’m only asking you to go pamper yourself, and when you come home, I’ll have dinner waiting.”

Nodding in my grip, she agreed to the offer. “Okay. I’ll take tomorrow off.” She turned her face into my left hand and kissed the palm, bringing her right hand up to cover it. She paused when she noticed the bandage.

“What happened?” She pulled my hand down to inspect it.

“I had a minor disagreement with a hacksaw this afternoon while you were gone. I may have been a little distracted,” I explained, pulling my hand back so she’d stop fussing over it. “It’s fine, I promise.”

“See. This is why I shouldn’t go anywhere tomorrow. You’re going to be too focused on me to work safely.”

Chuckling, I pulled Madison into my arms and kissed the top of her head. “The difference between today and tomorrow will be that we’ve discussed everything, so it won’t come as a big surprise.”

With a hesitant nod, she agreed. “Okay.”

“Okay,” I parroted. “So, what do you want to do?”

“Honestly?” My head bobbed up and down. “I’m exhausted. I’d like to have a shower and hit the sack.”

A much better idea came to me, so I hugged her to my chest and whispered, “How about a nice soothing bath? I’ll give you a neck rub and then we’ll go to bed together?”

While I started the bath, Madison called Bones in and closed the patio door. The dog ran straight to the bedroom while she entered the bathroom to climb into the tub. With a contented sigh, Madison relaxed back against my chest, and I wrapped my arms around her, placing tender kisses along the shell of her ear, down her neck, and over her shoulder. Starting at her neck, I massaged, moving my hands in firm strokes down her shoulders until I reached her lower back and hips.

I leaned forward until my lips brushed the shell of her ear. “I love you.”

Madison hummed softly tilting her head back to look at me. “I love you, too.”

I placed a tender kiss on her lips before continuing my massage. We were silent for a moment as my hands moved over her waist, coming to a stop on her abdomen. Soon, her belly would begin to grow as our baby did, and I couldn’t wait for that to happen. When she placed her hands over mine, I twisted my wrists until we were palm-to-palm, lacing our fingers together as I lifted them from the water and kissed her left hand.

The minute my lips touched the warm skin of her hand, my eyes fell to her naked ring finger and my thoughts shifted. What if there was no “right moment?” I was pretty sure our relationship would attest to the fact that things always just happened for a reason and that you can’t always plan them out to the letter. What would make this any different?

Keeping her hand within sight, I continued to stare at the bare skin of her ring finger where I knew a ring should sit. Madison deserved more, and I wanted to give it to her. My thumb grazed over the back of her hand, causing her arm to break out in goose bumps as she giggled and turned to press a kiss to my neck before snuggling in and inhaling deeply. 

It was then that I realized that
this
was the perfect moment. We were alone and together; it didn’t get more perfect than that. Sighing against the top of her head, I whispered, “Marry me, Madison …”