Christmas Delights 3 (55 page)

Jake stepped up behind Dain, who didn’t flinch or try to get
away. Dain had always kept Mick in view, prepared for attack. The trust he had
in Jake already was unprecedented. Safety and men didn’t mix for Dain. First,
his father, and then Gary, a verbally abusive prick who Dain had endured for
three months before Mick had come along, his knight in shining fucking armor.
Because of those three, Dain believed men only wanted to destroy him.
Not
Jake. He’s different.
While he believed it, there was too much blocking
their way.

Strong fingers touched Dain’s neck, kneading the rock hard
muscles. Dropping his head forward, Dane willed the relaxation to filter
through every muscle of his body.

“What happened that night, Dain?”

Two thumbs rubbed over the top of Dain’s spine and he
moaned. Any inkling of his migraine dissipated.  Soaking in every inch of those
hands, he said, “If I tell, it’ll grow arms and legs and a head and fucking eat
me alive.”

Jake leaned over his shoulder and whispered. “I won’t let
that happen. I won’t let anyone hurt you again.” Dain shuddered, and fuck, if
he didn’t believe every word. But the minute he spilled the details of that
awful night and his past, Jake’s touches would stop and he needed that touch
like a man dying of thirst. 

 Warm air feathered across Dane’s cheek and Jake whispered,
“I lied earlier.”

Dain licked at his dry lips. “About what?”

"I don’t want to be your friend, Sweetheart."

The seductive whisper ran straight to Dain's cock. Dain
wanted to touch Jake, kiss him, lick him. No one had touched Dain since Mick.
Fuck friendship.

 “Don’t want that either.” God, his dick was speaking for
him now.

Dain turned and a hot spike of desire shot straight to his
core as their eyes connected. Jake’s chest rose rapidly and his eyes hooded.
Dain placed a hand over Jake’s racing heart as Jake’s large hands settled
gently on Dain’s hips. With shallow breaths, shaky legs, and heart pounding
against his ribs, Dain lifted his chin.

“Kiss me,” he whispered.

Their lips crashed together like a breaking tide. Tongues
tangled and the kiss took on an increasing urgency, but Jake pulled back and,
with a frowning confusion, searched Dane’s eyes for something. Dain wanted to
question him, but need overruled. Opening for another kiss, Dain ate at Jake’s
mouth as if he were starving. Jake’s hands ran down Dain’s back then squeezed
his ass. Dain bucked his hips and Jake answered with a buck of his own. Shit, a
mammoth bulge pressed into Dain’s stomach. God, he wanted this man here and
now, forever.

When Jake squeezed Dain’s aching hard dick, white-hot fire
shot down his shaft and drew his balls closer to his body. Spots filled his
vision. Luckily, his arms were around Jake’s neck when his knees gave out.
Reaching between them, Dain grabbed Jake’s cock through his jeans.

“Fuck!” Jake exclaimed.

Jake ripped open the front of Dain’s jeans. When warm
fingertips brushed Dain’s head, his balls throbbed, his ass clenched, and he
fought tooth and nail not to come. Before he could beg for reprieve, Jake was
on his knees and swallowing his cock.

“Jake!” Dain wrapped those curls tight around his fingers.

Jake pulled off his cock. “Fuck my mouth, sweetheart.”
Jake’s hands then cupped his buttocks and pulled him forward as he sucked him
down again.

“Don’t stop,” Dain groaned, bucking into hot mouth. “God,
yes, c-coming!” Dain rode the blissful high that encompassed his very soul then
fell to his knees attacking Jake’s mouth. When he pulled back, the sated look
on Jake’s face turned Dain’s attention to his lover’s cock and his cum on the
floor. With a smirk, Jake said, “Couldn’t help it with the way you were fucking
my mouth.”

Dain could love this heaven-sent savior but he had to tell
Jake the truth about the night of his accident, and all of this would be over
before it began.

After a quick cleanup, they met in the living room. The
hopefulness in Jake’s sated face practically killed Dain. Jake cupped Dain’s
cheek and Dain nuzzled then kissed his palm. Jake smiled warmly and Dain pulled
Jake into a sweet goodbye kiss then stepped away. Wrapping his arms around his
middle, Dain lowered his eyes and for the first time ever spoke aloud about his
abuse.

“That night, Mick and I went to the Pub. The entire night is
like a series of memory flashes with huge chunks missing from the knock on my
head. I do remember talking with other people and dancing, which is strange
because Mick didn’t allow that crap. Shit, I think that hit really scrambled my
brains because I remember getting hot and heavy with Mick at the bar and we
passed hot and heavy about nine months ago.

“We ended up leaving early because we got into a fight. On
the drive home, Mick was pissed because some guy had bought me a drink and
claimed I was drooling over him. Seriously, I don’t even remember the guy. The
last thing I do remember is walking up the stairs behind Mick to my apartment.
He was too quiet.” Shit, this was hard. Bowing his head, Dain continued. “When
Mick got to the top of the stairs, he turned around and”—that sneering,
malicious, plotting look on Mick’s face was forever burned into Dain’s
memory—“he pushed me.”

The silence coming from Jake made Dain look up. Jake’s face
had a pale and pained look as if someone had kicked him square in the chest. He
sighed heavily and muttered, “Fuck no.” The shake of his voice, the unmitigated
pain in those lovely hazel eyes nearly floored Dain. “It was me, Dain. Oh shit,
I bought you that drink. And it was me, not Mick, you were making out with.”

Dain sucked in a breath as the room spun. “What the fuck are
you talking about?”

“Since we met, you’ve reminded me of the guy I met at the
bar. It was at the same bar you were at with Mick. The same night. But that guy
had long curly blonde hair and a goatee and it was dark and I was drunk when
he—you—dragged me into that dark corner. Just now when you kissed me, it was so
familiar and so fucking sweet. I’m sorry, I didn’t know.”

Dain shook his head. He would never be so bold. He had been
plotting ways to break away from Mick, but making out with a stranger was
playing with fire. But now it all made sense. Mick had seen him with Jake. And
Mick had been beyond angry. Calm and cool and fucking planned, Mick had tried
to kill him. Fuck, his head hurt.

“It was my fault. He pushed you because of me.” Jake’s hands
shook as he wiped at his face.

Dain couldn’t stop the snort. “Yeah and what about all of
the other times the fucker hit me or kicked me or shoved me? Those your fault
too?”

The guilt on Jake’s face turned into horror that quickly
cleared and his face took on a stony calmness. Much like the sheriff that had
asked Dain to step out of his car. Shit.

“You have to press charges against Mick.”

Not the words Dain had expected. “Oh, fuck no!”

“Dain, it was attempted murder. He needs to go to jail.”

“No, no, no. Mick is gone.”

“The man abused you. He can’t get away with it!”

Dain shrunk back, leery of the growing agitation in Jake’s
face. “But he already has. Nothing will change what he did to me.”

“You’ll get justice,” the sheriff growled.

“Justice won’t fix anything. And Mick isn’t my biggest
problem.”

Jake moved forward and grabbed his biceps with a swiftness
that startled Dain. “You have to. You could have died!”

Anger swirled in Jake’s eyes and his hands were on Dain, and
shit if his years of reflexes didn’t kick in. “Just hit me and get it over
with!” Dain screamed and nothing could match the horror in Jake’s eyes as he
released Dain.

Dain slapped a hand over his mouth. How many times had he
begged his father or Mick to stop the emotional torture and just hit him? The
telltale flashes of light in his vision and the creeping numbness signaled a
full-blown migraine. Dain tried to suck in air that no longer existed as that
lovely holiday meal sloshed around in his stomach. He prayed he didn’t vomit on
Jake’s nice black leather boots.

Jake said nothing, trapped in a motionless stare and that’s
how Dain left him. This time Jake didn’t try to stop him.

Chapter Five

Dain wanted to die. The cold hard tile of the bathroom floor
did little to soothe the throbbing ache in his head. Any light stabbed hot
pokers into his eyes, and noises were atomic bombs in his ears. Any movement
had him dry heaving into the toilet above him. The bathroom was quiet and dark,
the window covered with a blackout curtain. There he’d floated in the surreal painful
land of his migraine all night, unable to move. He had no one to call, no one
who’d cared that he’d spent the night on the floor of his bathroom. If he could
call someone, they might think he was drunk because his words would slur and he
was having a hard time pasting together coherent thoughts. Death would be too
much of a reward right now. 

Jake was there in the darkness, the only brightness Dain’s
mind could stand. Jake had surely filed Dain under “don’t call again” by now
and that thought reached in and yanked Dain’s heart out of his chest. Dain had
thrown his crazy all over Jake’s world and the man would be lucky if he could
wash it off any time soon.

“Just hit me and get it over with.”

A throb of pain brought tears to his eyes. The look on Jake’s
face would forever sully the few good memories they’d had. What was Jake
thinking today?  “Thank God, I dodged that bullet.” “What a waste of skin.”
“That guy deserved to get hit.”

Dain bit down hard on his fist as sobs racked his frame and
stirred the nausea. Dain had deserved to be hit, had earned it, had begged for
it. Begged for it like a masochist. It was easier to believe he’d asked for it
than accept the reason his father and Mick and Gary had all given him for their
violence—that he was a worthless piece of crap. 

Deep in his bones, Dain ached for the last time he’d truly
felt safe. Images of sitting in his mother’s lap came to mind, her arms wrapped
tight around him. He’d called her momma right up until she’d died and he missed
her horribly. With that memory, Dain now remembered the reason for his father’s
first punch. After the burial, Dain had told his father how much he missed
momma. The resulting punch had floored Dain.

 “Momma, please. I can’t do this anymore. Please help me,”
he whispered to the darkness. Tears ran down and pooled on the floor beneath
his cheek. “Please, I don’t want to be alone anymore. I’ve tried to be happy.”
And he
had
tried, because he’d promised her he would. But he’d only been
fifteen and he’d wanted her to be proud. How proud was she now that he was
losing his will to go on? 

Daino, wait for the snow that brings miracles...

He didn’t deserve the miracles—only the hurt and pain and
misery.

The bathroom door opened. Opening his eyes, Dain screamed at
the light viciously stabbing his eyes.

“Dain! What’s wrong?”

“The light!” Dain cried out.

Jake closed the door, returning the darkness, but that
scream continued to echo through Dain’s head.

“Dain, sweetheart, I’m so sorry.” The man’s voice was a
shaky whisper. “I’ve been trying to call you all night. What’s wrong?”

Migraine,” Dain whispered, and he wanted to tell Jake to go
because he didn't allow men in his apartment but he was relieved Jake was
there.

“Why’re you on the floor? Let me get you to your bed.”

“No, don’t move me,” Dain said between sobs, his head
throbbing incessantly.

“Do you have meds?”

“Took them.” Too late, though.

A soft brush of fingers against Dain’s arm raised goose
bumps. Jake was here. He’d come. But not knowing why he was there, if he would stay,
was too much.

“Please, go away,” Dain whispered.

“No, Dain, I’m not leaving you like this. Tell me what to
do.”

“Nothing you can do.”

Jake moved away but then he was behind Dain, spooning him on
the bathroom floor. An arm wrapped around Dain’s chest then rubbed soothing
circles over Dain’s stomach. He rested his head back against Jake’s chest.

“Please forgive me, Dain. I didn’t mean to scare you. I
would never ever hurt you.”

“I can’t go after Mick, I can’t—”

Jake shushed him, then started rubbing as the base of his
neck. The counter pressure dulled the throbbing as a wave of fatigue washed
over Dain. His migraine was winding down and the resulting exhaustion would
knock Dain out for about twelve hours. He didn’t want to sleep, he wanted to be
with Jake, needed him to know everything.

“I see the real you, shiny and bright and soft,” Dain
mumbled. “I like shiny and soft.”

 “That’s what you told me at the bar. Then you stole my
heart.” There was a hitch and shakiness in his voice. 

“Can’t keep it. Too much of a coward...weak...let my father
and Mick beat on me. Never stuck up for myself.”

Jake rubbed cheeks with Dain’s in the sweetest gesture.
“You’re not a coward. You’re one of the bravest people I know. Weak people
don’t survive and you survived.”

 “It’s my fault. I asked for it. Asked to be hit and
punched.”

“Abusers thrive on mind games and mental torture, and
sometime it’s easier to piss them off and get the hit. Asking to hit is
survival, Dain, but it doesn’t mean you wanted it. It’s a battle of control.
Mick tried to keep that control and, when he thought he was losing it, he
pushed you down the stairs. But he’s gone now and out of your life.”

“Not over. My dad...Fuck, I’m so tired.”

“Sleep sweetheart, I’ll be here.”

“You can’t promise that.”

“I want to promise you forever.”

 Dain heard a whimper escape his throat as he drifted off.
God, how he wanted forever.