Kaylee pressed a fist to her mouth as she hiccoughed, then swiped tears from her cheeks. Her lips trembled as she gathered words. “But you’ve found it now…this wisdom you need?”
“There’s no simple answer to that question. I’m searching, suppose I’ve been searching for a long time, even though I’m just now beginning to realize what the years away from here, from you, have done to me. Coming back, seeing you, I realize all I’ve missed out on. I feel as if I’ve woken from a deep, exhausting sleep.”
She understood exactly what he meant because she felt it, as well. As the gentle heat from him warmed, her nerve endings fired and her pulse thrummed like a guitar string that had been skillfully plucked. She drew a deep breath and stilled for a moment, simply reveling in the feeling. Then, calling on every ounce of willpower she possessed, Kaylee stepped away, breaking contact. She smoothed a hand over her sweater and moderated her voice.
“Thank you for the tree.” She crossed the room to grasp a bough. Her fingers came away sticky with the scent of pine and she inhaled deeply, waiting for the room to right itself. A bell tingled from a blown-glass ornament, piquing Fluffy’s interest so the kitten scampered from the tree skirt to mewl around Kaylee’s ankles. “It’s gorgeous, and you certainly delighted Rosie.”
“It pleased me, as well, to see her so happy.” He shifted feet and Kaylee saw a flash in his eyes that said he feared he’d lost her for good. Maybe he had. Time would tell.
“I can’t imagine my life without her, Riley—can’t imagine sending her back to the sorrowful place she came from. Don’t get me wrong, I love my brother. But he needs help that he refuses to seek. You and I both know the devastation that can lead to.” She shook her head. “I won’t take that chance and absolutely refuse to place Rosie in jeopardy. Perhaps you’re right about letting you help. Are there papers you can have drawn up? Something quick and painless that would guarantee Rosie would remain with me, at least as long as she wants to?”
“I’ll get the ball rolling, try my best to make the process as painless and quick as possible.” Riley jammed his hands into the pockets of his jeans. “Do you think Cody—or his ex-girlfriend—will object?”
“I don’t see why.”
“OK.” Riley took a tentative step toward her, drew her in once more. “In the meantime, I’d like you to trust me, Kaylee, to trust the love I feel for you. Do you think that’s possible?”
****
Riley toweled water from his hair and shrugged into a T-shirt as he padded across the bedroom. The scuffed wood floor creaked with age, reminding him of the memories that lingered. Down the hall, Gran’s less-than-dainty snores told him she was sound asleep. He was glad she’d found a portion of rest—it must be difficult to slumber alone in a bed that had been shared with her husband for nearly fifty-five years.
He thought of the grizzle-haired man who’d possessed a quick wit and slow temper. Rarely had Gramps ever raised his voice to anyone. He didn’t have to—his very presence demanded respect. He’d stood the test of time as a man of honor; Riley had never known him to go back on a promise or place blame where it didn’t firmly belong. Gramps had set a first-class example of what it meant to be a husband, father, grandfather and friend…as well as a true and faithful believer. Riley had been fortunate—truly blessed—to be the grandson of such a godly man.
Remembering that, dwelling on it, brought home just how badly Riley had missed the mark in that department—especially when it came to Kaylee.
Tonight she’d spilled her heart to him, and he saw the cost of her words in the tears that flooded her eyes, heard the echo of heartache in her anguished voice. How had he missed the fact that, in the weeks and months…the years following the accident, she’d been left so alone? He’d had Gran and Gramps…had always had them, even before he’d lost his mother. He’d spent the better part of his childhood running through the meadow, roaming the woods. His earliest memories included Gramps and Gran…their laughter and gentle guidance.
His memories included Kaylee, as well. Friends practically since the first day they’d both stepped foot into Maple Ridge Elementary and settled into the kindergarten story circle side-by-side, they’d shared winter days and summer twilight. Over the years, their friendship had flourished into something rich and deep. He’d fallen in love with her…as deeply in love as a seventeen-year-old could tumble. Back then, before he lost his mother and then, later on, Gramps, he didn’t understand the depth of that emotion—the power. But, now, with time thieving his days and experience on his side, the gravity of his love for her—love that yesterday he was sure had evaporated like raindrops in a gust of wind—pierced and gripped like a vice.
Wisdom…there was only one place to truly find what he sought. Moonlight spilled through the window, bathing Riley as he opened the drawer of the bedside table and withdrew the Bible Gramps had given him on his eighteenth birthday. It was still there, where he’d placed it when he left Maple Ridge for law school. He didn’t think he’d need it, figured he had all the answers to what he’d been through and what was coming. Now, he wondered how he could have ever been so foolish.
Riley slipped onto the edge of the bed, taking the Book with him. Flipping open the cover, he reread the inscription Gramps had penned long before the Alzheimer’s claimed him. He brushed his fingers over the letters as he read the words.
Dear Riley,
The years have claimed your childhood and formed you into a man ready to sample all the world has to offer. Be selective and use care with those you encounter. Like actions, words can never truly be retracted. This world has its rules and laws, but remember that the only true laws that matter are those assigned from above and that the greatest reference book known to man is the Bible.
In your life, you’ve experienced heartache beyond measure. The Lord never promised we would be without hurt and conflict, only that He would stand with us through the turmoil. Seek His strength and guidance in all you do.
It pains me to know your heart is riddled with resentment and fury. Much as a glass weakened by fissures fails to retain water, your heart is powerless to accept and hold onto the immeasurable love that waits for you. True healing begins with forgiveness, son. Letting go allows us to hold on.
Begin your journey with James 5:16…“Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The prayer of a righteous man is powerful and effective.”
Know, Riley, that you remain covered in fervent prayer as you step into the world. Allow the Lord to be your Guide and Counselor. Walk with Him and no matter the struggles you may encounter during the course of your journey, you will never be alone.
Godspeed, my son,
Gramps
6
Kaylee eased into line beside Riley and Rosie.
“Did you find everything you need?” he murmured.
Rosie was distracted by the jolly guy in a Santa suit and flanked by cheery elves. Her eyes were round and shiny as silver dollars while they stood three deep in the line. She paid no attention whatsoever to the grownup chatter.
“I did. Thanks for giving me the keys to the Escalade.” Kaylee handed them to him, winking. “I slipped the gifts into the trunk and covered them with the blanket you left there. We should have one very happy little girl come Christmas morning.”
We
…the world had skated out. Kaylee wondered if it was a sign of some internal change. Not a day had passed since Riley’s return that he hadn’t come to see her and Rosie. She wondered how long it would take for him to grow tired of Maple Ridge and decide it was time to leave once more. She tried not to think about it—or what losing him again would do to her heart.
“Who knew there were this many kids that wanted to put in a special order with Santa?”
“Saturday afternoon probably wasn’t the best choice to come.” But it was the only day she could get away from her duties at the hospital. “Thank you for waiting with Rosie so I could...” She glanced at Rosie, “…fill a special order or two.”
“It’s been…interesting.”
“Well, Santa has nothing on me.”
“Is that so?” Riley’s lips curved into a grin, making Kaylee wonder what he had up his sleeve. She assumed Rosie had filled his ear with her requests as the two shared chocolate chip cookies while waiting together in line. Riley’s generosity had given Kaylee a chance to snag a few of the toys she knew Rosie wanted, including a doll that cried and drank from a bottle and a couple of board games they could all enjoy together—if Riley remained in Maple Ridge. “We’ve almost made it through the gauntlet. Is your camera ready?”
Kaylee held up her cell phone. “Right here.”
“Good, because it’s show time.”
One spritely elf dropped the velvet rope barrier with a pert nod and a smile, and Rosie skipped through to scamper up to Santa. Without reservation, she climbed into the red-suited man’s ample lap. Kaylee snapped a picture, two, as Rosie leaned over to cup his ear and whisper excitedly. A short, hushed conversation ensued as the man glanced Kaylee’s way. Then, pleased as pie, Rosie offered Kaylee and Riley a little victory wave as she hopped from Santa’s lap and skipped back to grab Riley’s hand. “We can go now, Mom. Santa knows what I want. He promised to bring it, too.”
“And what, exactly, did you ask for?”
“It’s a secret. Only Santa can know.” She skipped down the aisle way, her blonde hair tousled. “But, don’t worry, Mom. Santa promised. And, just like you, he never, ever breaks a promise.”
Great.
Kaylee shook her head, feeling the beginnings of a stress headache weaving its way into her brain. She wondered how she would ever manage this one.
Just great.
****
“What do you think she asked for?” Riley inquired as Kaylee returned from tucking Rosie into bed. “Did she offer any hints?”
“No.” Kaylee blew a wisp of honey-colored hair from her pretty emerald eyes. “And I have absolutely no idea.”
“I’ll do a little detective work while you’re on your shift at the hospital Monday.”
“How will you manage that with Rosie at school?”
“She told me it’s only a half-day, the last school day before Christmas vacation begins, so I’ll swing by the elementary school and pick her up, take her to lunch.”
“Ah, that’s right.” Kaylee’s lips crooked into a knowing grin. “I planned to knock off work early, too, but if you want to get Rosie, spend a little time, that’s fine. It will give me a chance to run by the novelty shop and pick up her sheep costume for the nativity play.”
“Yes, she mentioned that, as well. I suppose I’ll be by to pick you up about five-thirty on Christmas Eve, and we can head to the church together?” He hadn’t been through the church doors in years, but right now the thought of heading there with Kaylee and Rosie, Gran as well, sounded better than a million dollars. Maybe he was losing his mind, but if this
was
going insane, he figured there was no one he’d rather head that direction with than Kaylee. “I don’t want to miss it.”
Kaylee crooked an eyebrow at him as she grinned. “She’s got you wrapped around her finger, Riley.”
“There are worse places to be.” He drew the Escalade’s keys from his pocket. “Do you think it’s safe to bring the gifts in?”
“Yes. Rosie was out cold before I left the bedroom. All this excitement…”
“I’ll be right back, then.” He strode through the front door. The air was crisp and cool, ripe with the hint of another round of snow. This just might be the year of the big one, like they’d experienced back in ’93. He’d been just a kid then, and he and Kaylee had spent a good part of the day riding the hills along the east side of the meadow. He’d have to stop by the hardware store, grab a couple of sleds, just in case the clouds dumped enough.
He drew a deep, cleansing breath as he marveled at the turn of events he’d experienced the past few weeks. Rosie was a treat—who knew waiting in line with her to see Santa would be so entertaining? It was almost like being part of a family…almost.
He lifted the SUV’s rear hatch and pulled a large box from the trunk. The label told him the carton contained a dollhouse. Riley sure didn’t know much about dolls and their houses, but with all the intricate parts in the picture, he figured it looked like a two-person construction project. He made a mental note to offer Kaylee help in putting it together.
Next, he withdrew a bag filled with a pair of board games and a doll the size of a real infant. At least Riley thought it was the size of an infant. He’d never seen a newborn in person, up close. Even so, he couldn’t imagine abandoning one. Which brought him ’round to Kaylee again, and reminded him of the letter he’d overnighted via certified mail to her brother, Cody, nearly a week ago.
That was one fringe benefit of working for a legal office—connections and the manpower to find people. It didn’t take Riley long at all to locate Cody just where Kaylee said she’d last heard from him—Albuquerque, New Mexico. The letter had solicited a phone call from Cody which lasted nearly half-an-hour, in which Riley gathered necessary information to move things forward. He then quickly followed up by faxing papers. The rest was in God’s hands, but he would do what he could to help Kaylee…and Rosie. Until he was certain of the outcome, he’d keep the details to himself so Kaylee wouldn’t have reason to worry more than she already had, especially this close to Christmas.
Riley secured the hatch with a swing of his hip and returned to the house, where Kaylee waited with a hot cup of coffee and a plate of sugar cookies.
“Rosie’s going to love that doll house.”
“Once it’s put together.” Riley set the box on the floor. “Looks like some project. I’ll gladly volunteer my services.”
“Thanks. That’s awfully kind of you. Perhaps I’ll keep you on retainer.” She stretched to her tiptoes and leaned across the box in his arms to plant a kiss on his cheek. “It’s a job for Christmas Eve, following the nativity and the candlelight service and after Rosie’s been put to bed. I suppose the holiday wouldn’t be complete without an all-nighter, assembling something annoyingly intricate and impossibly tedious.”