Cipher (23 page)

This was where it always went wrong. The energy usually exploded around me in all directions, but I was trying to send it to Knight. It sounded simple to direct the power toward him. Easy even. But we’d been at it for hours and I hadn’t gotten any better at hitting the target.

I let out a slow breath and concentrated on Knight. He stood a few feet away, holding his palms out to me, stance wide, waiting to take the hit.

A hit that I didn’t want to give.

Maybe that was the problem. “What if you get burned? Or your heart stops? I don’t know CPR.”

He crossed his arms. “I promise you’re not going to hurt me. I can take it.”

“I could kill you with this much energy.” I’d built so much up that even my teeth were tingling. I didn’t know how much it was exactly, but it was more than it took to kill a person.

“No, you can’t. I’ve grounded you before. Why’re you hesitating?”

Because I hadn’t cared this much about him before. Now I did.

What a jerk.

I knocked my lip ring with my teeth. “This is a supremely bad idea.”

“Stop being such a baby and do it. Hit me with it. Do it. Now. Don’t be such a chicken—”

I flung my hands in his direction and released the energy—lightning sizzled down my arms, arcing straight for his chest.

Knight grunted as he took the hit, stumbling back a few steps.

Holy crap.
I didn’t mean to do that.
It was too much. I knew it was too much. At least he wasn’t on the ground.

He bent over with his hands on his thighs for a second, panting, before looking at me with a grin. “Now that’s what I call a hit.”

My jaw must’ve been on the ground. “You’re okay?”

“Yes, I’m okay.”

I closed the distance between us and patted him down, feeling for any injury. I barely even noticed his bare abs as my hands ran over them. “Really? Are you sure? You’re not feeling faint? Funny?”

“Oh, I’m feeling really funny.”

Something about his tone had me stopping my motions. “You are?”

“Yeah.” He drew out the word. “Super funny.”

He leaned down like he was going to kiss me and my breath caught. I wanted it. Wanted to feel his lips against mine.

He picked me up and I ran my fingers through his hair. I started to lower my head to his when he took off for the water.

“Not this again! Knight! Seriously?”

His laugh rumbled through me, and I couldn’t help it if I held on tighter and never wanted to let go.

***

Knight and I sat on the quiet beach while the sun set. I’d tried a few more times to replicate what I’d done before, but couldn’t get it to work. We decided to stop for the day since I was only getting more and more frustrated.

I twisted the fake wedding band around my finger as I thought. It’d become a comfort to me. Which was a dangerous thing. “Do you ever wonder what our lives would’ve been like if that day hadn’t happened? Like, would we still be friends?” Sensing his gaze, I stared straight ahead, watching the sun disappear behind the horizon.

“Of course we’d still be friends. We’re friends now, aren’t we?”

I blew out a breath. “I guess.”

“You guess?” The tease in his question was thick.

I gave him a half-smile. “Okay. We’re friends.”

He snorted. “You don’t have to keep that wall up, Em. It’s just you and me here. We know all of each other’s secrets.”

Not even close. I hadn’t been willing to tell him when I thought he was just Knight, but even now there were things he didn’t need to know. As soon as he’d freaked about why I was short, I’d known I had to protect him from the rest of my past. Besides, he hadn’t told me much about what he’d gone through at the Trials or helix school.

Hunter or Knight—I knew who he was inside, and he knew me. “Just in case I don’t get a chance to tell you, thanks.”

“For?”

“For being you.”

He laughed. “Okay.”

I was hedging and he knew it, but opening up even that much was a struggle. Losing everyone I’d ever cared about had done a number on me. “For not forgetting about me. For getting your DNA altered for me. That was kind of a crazy move.”

“Necessary.”

“What?”

“Necessary move. Not crazy. I needed help, so you helped me. Now you need help, so I’m helping you. No agenda. That’s what friends do.” He paused. “I asked Lady Eva to pair me with you. Most Reds need a balancing person for their ability. As soon as I found out, I wanted to be there for you like you were there for me. I probably should’ve waited and asked you first, but…”

I didn’t know what to say to that. He’d changed everything for me. Given up so much. He kept saying that he owed me, but I was finally understanding how much
I
owed
him.

I cleared my throat. “So, how long do we get to stay here exactly?”

“Until we get the call that we can go back.”

“How close are Jack’s choppers?”

“Last night they were pretty close, but today they’re gone. We’ll probably head out tomorrow afternoon. Next day at the latest.” He bumped his shoulder against mine. “Sick of me already?”

“What? No!”

“I was joking.”

“Right.” The guy made me stupid. My cheeks burned. “Really I was thinking about the packets. I’m hungry and I don’t know how much more of that crap I can eat. I’d kill for a bean and cheese burrito right about now.”

“We’ll get you some good food as soon as we get back to civilization. Promise.” He stood and held a hand down to me. As soon as I put my hand in his, everything quieted. Even if the noise was faint on the island, I always felt it buzzing.

When Knight touched me, it was like being covered in a warm blanket.

Peaceful.

At first, I’d found it disorienting, but now I was afraid I was getting addicted. It was like Knight could erase my helix with one touch. If I weren’t careful, he’d end up a crutch instead of a crush.

“How about an omelet?”

“No! Breakfast is my favorite meal. One packet and it’ll be ruined forever.”

“Okay. I have mac and cheese. Beef stroganoff. Or more chicken teriyaki.”

“I’ll take the chicken. I’m already ruined for life on that one.”

“You got it.”

As we ate, I thought about all the times we’d hung out online. “Did you ever think you knew me from somewhere else when we gamed?”

“I really thought you were a guy.” He stabbed his spoon in the bag a few times. “It’s a little creepy when you think about it. I’m attracted to someone I used to think was a guy.”

That was too funny. “So my cover is full-on mindfucking you?”

He jabbed at me with the spoon. “It’s not funny. If we weren’t childhood friends, I’d be seriously annoyed.”

I barely swallowed down another bite of the chicken mush. “All right. I think I’m done. I’m not full but not hungry anymore. I can’t stand this stuff.”

Knight reached for my packet. “It’s not that bad.” He took a bite and made a face. “Okay. Maybe it is that bad.”

“Yeah. Don’t give me any of that nonsense. Anyone with taste buds would know it was disgusting.”

“Meet you in the tent? I’ll clean up.”

As I got ready for bed, nerves twisted in my stomach.

It felt like we were leading up to being more than friends, and I was already getting too attached. If I slept with Knight, like really
slept
with him, then I’d never let him go.

I wasn’t that strong.

When he unzipped the tent flap, I pretended to be asleep. Avoidance seemed the best way to go about things.

I stayed still on my side, facing away from him. I kept my breathing as steady and even as possible, but I wasn’t prepared for him to plaster himself to my back. His arm slid across my stomach.

“Good night, Em.” He brushed a kiss to the top of my head. “I…”

My heart picked up its pace until it thundered in my ears.

He wasn’t going to say what he thought.

“I’ll see you in the morning.”

I let out a breath, and was surprised to realize that it hurt that he didn’t say the words I wanted.

But how could I ask for those words when I couldn’t say them in return?

Chapter Sixteen

KNIGHT

Choppers.

The rhythmic sound of blades cutting air jolted me awake.

They’d found us. The only way off this island would be stealing one of their rides.

This one fuck up was going to cost me everything.

“Cipher.”

Her eyes fluttered open and she shot up as soon as she heard the noise. “Let’s go.” She jammed on her shoes and started to grab the pack.

“Leave it.” I pulled out weapons, jamming one gun in the back of my waistband, and leaving another to carry. The spare ammo went in my pockets. Anything more and it would slow us down. We couldn’t afford that, and we were way beyond needing to hide the camp.

They already knew we were here.

I unzipped the tent and stepped toward the beach. Still dark. Five beams of lights meant five choppers overhead. They’d be on the ground in minutes.

We only had two options, and I hated one of them. Really fucking hated.

Emma stood beside me. “What now? We’re stuck here. Sitting ducks.”

“I know.” I made sure one bullet was in the chamber of my gun before turning back towards the trees. “There’s a cave not far from here.” I grabbed two water bottles with filters and some jerky from the tent. It wouldn’t last us long, but it was the best I could do.

Emma could hide in relative safety while I separated the strike force, taking them out one by one.

Still a crapshoot. We were too outnumbered.

But the second option…

Not yet. I wouldn’t even consider it.

“The cave is our best shot. It’s deep and the rock should block their tech from sensing us.” I pulled Emma behind me, moving deeper into the trees. Emma’s footsteps trampled the ground.

The only thing going for us was that it was night. The jungle drowned out most of the light. Emma tripped and I caught her.

“I can’t move this fast. I can’t see anything,” she said.

I squatted down. “Hop on.”

“What? No. You can’t carry me.”

“Yes, I can. You weigh a lot less than my pack. We don’t have time to argue. Hop on.” She jumped and I caught her legs around my waist. “Just hold on so I can keep my hands free.”

“Okay.” Her legs squeezed and I pushed away the unavoidable flash of desire. Now wasn’t the time, even if my body had a different opinion.

I could already hear the teams moving through the woods behind us. I knew the route, but with each passing second, we lost ground. They were going to catch us.

I was going to fail. I had Emma here, and I was going to fail.

Sweat rolled down my face, and I pushed myself harder.

Gunfire hit the tree next to me.

“Down,” I said, and Emma dropped off my back. I took cover and spotted three guys coming our way. All dressed in black.

Three shots and they were down. The sound echoed among the trees, silencing the night for a moment before more shouts rang out.

They knew where we were now. We were out of time. Complete and total fear gripped me. Adrenaline raced through my body and I knew we needed to run. Fast.

“Move,” I said and Emma didn’t hesitate.

We raced through the trees like the hounds of hell were after us.

Another shot rang out as we jumped over a fallen tree. Shattered bark bit against my cheek.

That was too fucking close.

I kept moving but Emma stopped. She stood next to the fallen tree, eyes wide in fear, cheeks flushed from running.

What the hell is she doing?

I raced back to her, pulling her down into a crouch, hidden in the brush. “Are you hit?”
Please don’t say yes
.
Please don’t say yes
.

She panted and shook. I tried to run my hands over her, but she swatted me away. “You have to hide.”

My blood chilled. “We.
We
have to hide.” She’d figured out the other option, and I couldn’t let her agree to it.

She shook her head. “We’re not getting out of this alive. I’ll surrender and go with them. But you have to come get me. You have to find me again.”

No. This was a bad idea. A really seriously bad idea. I couldn’t let the Seligo have Emma. Not for a day, not for a minute. They’d only let her live long enough to torture her as they probed her genetics. “No. We go together or not at all.”

Her gaze met mine, both determined and bright with fear. “It’s not your choice. It’s mine. They’re taking me either way, but if I go and you stay, then there’s a chance that we both survive.”

I searched for something—anything—that would change her mind. “Mona would disagree. Splitting up is a terrible idea.”

Emma gripped my hand. “It’s the only option. You’ll be safe. If I go, you’ll be safe.”

“No—”

“Find me.”

Terror gripped my gut, and I froze. She couldn’t do this. I wouldn’t let her. “No. Emma—”

She dropped my hand and lunged, heading for the beach.

My training said to stay. She was right—we needed to make this sacrifice.

Fuck that
.

“No. Emma!” I raced after her until I caught her hand.

“Don’t make this any harder,” she whispered harshly. Then Emma closed the distance between us, pressing her lips to mine.

I sank into the feel of her. It wasn’t enough. This wasn’t enough time. I wanted more. Life couldn’t be this unfair—to give me a couple perfect days and then rip Emma away from me.

“I refuse to watch you die,” she said as she pulled away. “I’m trusting you with my life. You find me. Save me.”

Shouts rang out nearby. It was either let her go or both of us died here.

My stomach dropped to my feet, and I couldn’t breathe. “You stay alive. You do what you have to stay alive.”

She nodded, and then spun. Racing toward danger.

I ducked behind a tree. It took everything I had not to charge after her.

Logic said I should run the other way, but I stalked through the trees, following the sounds as quietly as possible.

Black Helixes surrounded her in a clearing lit by chemlights.

Jack Parson broke through the trees in a rubberized protective vest. “Be careful. She’s dangerous even without wires around.”