Closer to the Heart (The Heart Trilogy Book 3) (23 page)

Chapter 31

The next thing I remembered was my phone beeping and with bleary eyes I reached for it. It was Charlotte for one of our regular weekly chats.

"Give me ten minutes sweetheart" I texted back, before setting the computer and webcam up and then taking another few to wash my face. I hoped that she wouldn't notice my puffy eyes. Then I turned on the screen and saw her beautiful face, the wet tendrils of hair slipping from the towel wound round it.

"Hi Charlie, how are rehearsals?"

"Hey Mum, they're going well I don't have to be in until lunchtime today but then we're going to do our first run through of the whole thing"

"Sounds good, I so hope that I can come home in time to see you perform"

"Me too Mum"

I watched her sweep a strand of hair from her eyes.

"Are Nana an
d
Granda
d
ok?"

"As well as can be expected" I replied, I didn't want to worry her with the news of the previous night.

"Have you been home to see James?"

"No, I've been so tired at weekends that I sometimes don't get up until lunchtime
,
the
n
I'm practising"

"Well, don't burn yourself out, your health is important"

A brief flicker of something crossed her face at my comment and I almost pushed but she looked at her watch.

"I've got to go no
w
Mum
,
I'll speak to you next week"

"I'll look forward to it, love you honey"

"Love you too Mum"

I padded into the kitchen and started to prepare a salad and some chicken for dinner. Dad appeared.

"How's Mum?"

"No change, she's just lying there
,
it’
s
like she's given up living" his voice cracked as he slumped down in the chair.

"I'll come with you tomorrow and we can both hear what the consultant has to say"

After another silent meal he went down to the cricket club for a couple of beers and I took my book and music out to catch the last rays of sun. The next morning the weather seemed to match our mood, cloudy and grey. Dad drove to the hospital and after a silent half hour in her room the consultant appeared and ushered us into his office.

"So, when can she come home?" my Dad asked.

"I think after wha
t
happene
d
it might be better for her to move into one of our care facilities"

"But I want her home"

I could see the determination in his eyes as he stared straight ahead at the consultant.

"Dad, it might be best, we can choose the right one for her"

"No, she's coming home with me" he stood up and stormed out of the room. I hesitated in my chair.

He smiled kindly at me, his gaze taking in my scars.

"You understand, don't you?"

"Yes, but it's a hard decision for Dad to make, he's looked after her for so long now"

"She can stay here for now, but I'll need an answer after the weekend so we can get the paperwork completed"

I nodded and stood up to shake his hand.

"Has she regressed back to a time from your past?" he enquired, his fingertips jus
t
glancingove
r
the tip of my scar.

"Yes, sh
e
think
s
I'm still a teenager and yes that was when I did this" I motioned to my scars "I think she still feels guilty that she didn't realise how I was feeling"

"No one can ever know, but she's tried once so chances are she will try again. In a home she can be monitored twenty four seven, if you tried that even between the two of you, you'll be knackered before the week is out"

"I'll talk to him"

"Thank
s
Stephanie
,
and try not to worry about your Mum she's in a safe place"

I found Dad outside in the drizzle, his head bowed and hands shoved in his pockets.

"Come on Dad, shall we go home"

"No
,
let’
s
go to the Harbour"

Driving the now familiar road we saw the sea crashing against the protective barrier of the harbour wall. We both walked along the gangplank until we reached the yacht. I watched him climb aboard and then hold out his hand for mine.

"I don't think this is a good idea" I protested, as he passed me a life jacket.

"It probably isn't but I need to do it"

I sat down and let Dad steer us out into the choppy seas, the rain lashed at our faces and soaked our clothes. We flew down the coastline, faster than I had ever been before. I clung onto the side and watched my father battling with the forces of nature, the muscles in his arms straining to keep the wheel straight.

Turning I grabbed the sail round and we found ourselves at the mercy of the waves before the wind caught once more.

"Are you ok Dad?" I shouted into the air. He nodded and I watched his skill in handling the yacht in such stormy weather through the harbour opening. Back at our pitch I found my legs were shaking as I climbed down to tie us off. Russell and Wilbur had made the walk along and stood waiting for us.

"That was brave, sailing in this weather" he said, as my Dad stepped down.

"Probably stupid, but we're back in one piece" he said, smiling at Russell and reaching to stroke Wilbur.

"Come on Dad, we're soaked and I think in need of a hot drink"

"Yes, good ide
a
Step
h
and thanks for indulging your old man"

"Less of the old Dad" I jested, taking his arm in mine.

Back at home we each showered and I was about to put the kettle on when Dad gave me a glass of brandy.

"Think we need this more" he said, a small look of pain crossed his face. The liquid heated us from the inside and Dad scraped together some wood to light the fire.

"So Dad, I think we really need to consider the offer, Mum is not safe by herself and we can't provide the kind of care that she really needs now"

"You're right, it's all I've been thinking about since the other night but I feel like I'm letting her down"

"You're not Dad, she will still be nearby but you can try and still have a life, you know take the yacht out in better weather than today? Hang out with your friends at the club"

My Dad caught my eyes and his gaze was warm, he opened his arms and I snuggled into them.

"We'll do it, I'm going to find it hard at first but you need to go home to James and Charlotte, where you belong"

"Dad" my sob broke and he held me as I cried. Cried for all the times we had shared as a family, for the time we had spent apart and for the Mum I once knew. He stroked my hair and I pulled my emotions back in.

"I'll stay until she's sorted and you are happy"

"Just the sorted will do, just promise you'll come back to visit and bring my beautiful granddaughter with you"

"I will Dad, believe me I will"

The next day we returned to the hospital and started to fill in all the paperwork so that enquiries could be made into the best place for her. We went out for dinner in the pub by the harbour and enjoyed the view of the calmer sea.

"The yacht's yours, why do you think we called it Stephanie's Star"

"Thanks Dad, you can look after it for me until I come back"

That evening I called James and told him everything that had happened.

"So when will you be back"

"I'll check the flights tomorrow, but I want to see Mum settled in the home and that might take a week or two"

"So you might be back for Charlotte's premier"

"You bet I will, even if I have to come straight from the airport to the theatre"

"She'll be overjoyed"

"I know and James, I can't wait to see you"

I left Charlotte a text message and her reply woke me in the middle of the night, a smiley face adorned the words "Can't wait"

The hospital called the next morning and arranged the date for Mum's move, so that we had time to choose some things for her to take from home. I booked a flight and managed to secure one for the day before the premier before I walked down for what would be one of my last few sailing lessons. I was the first aboard and as I waited fo
r
Se
b
to arrive I stroked the smooth surface of the yacht that would one day belong to me. I was still day-dreaming about the perfect sailing trip with James beside me, looking for a sheltered cove so that we could undress and make love on the sandy shore.

"He
y
Steph, you're looking better today"

I blushed as my memory faded and I turned t
o
Seb.

"Yes, things are moving in the right direction and it looks like I might be on my way home soon"

His face fell slightly but he hugged me and then we set sail together. The sea was calm and still so we struggled to catch the wind at times and just coasted along. I told him about my trip out with Dad in the storm and watched as his face paled, a memory flickered there.

"Dangerous thing storms, you can never guess their next move" he mumbled, as h
e
tie
d
off a few knots.

"I know, I was clinging on and praying but Dad was in control. I guess I have a lot still to learn"

"Not really, just one lesson I'm going to tell you today"

"What's that?"

"We'll stop half way and I'll share it with you" he smiled, sadly.

We went in the opposite direction and as I steered I admired the more rugged coastline, sharp cliff faces dived into the deeper sea. But then we rounded a point off the mainland and I gasped.

"Wow, a beautiful hidden beach, you should have bought me here yesterday"

"It’s a special place for me" he whispered, standing close as I slowed. He gathered in the sail and I dropped the anchor. The warm sun beat down and I stripped down to my bikini.

"Sorry I can't resist"

I left him stunned on the deck as I dived into the deep azure ocean beneath us. Surfacing I lay on my back and gazed up at Stephanie's Star bobbing around on the swell.

"Come o
n
Seb
,
it’
s
exhilarating"

He stripped off his shirt and tightened his shorts before he jumped in to join me.

The water stripped me of my inhibitions and I playfully splashed him as he surfaced. He spluttered and aimed a splash back but I had already turned to swim. I stroked strongly towards the shore of the deserted beach, I could hear him gaining on me so it was no surprise when his hand grabbed my foot and pulled me under. He let go and I surfaced to find him bobbing in the water ahead of me.

"That's what you get for splashing me" he laughed, his face the most vibrant I had seen since our first meeting. The joy of simply playing in the waves had allowed the years to strip away from his features. With his wet hair curling over his face he looked younger than his 36 years.

"Race you to the beach" I shouted, kicking off into a frantic front crawl.

"You're on"

He had a slight head start on me but I soon caught up and passed him, a first for me as when I raced James he always won.

I flopped down on the wet sand just beyond the reach of the waves and stared up at the cloudless sky
.
Se
b
did the same a few moments later, each of us panting to catch our breath.

"You'd better not tell anyone I was beaten by
a
girl
,
I have a reputation to uphold"

"A reputation, you do surprise me"

He turned onto his side, resting his head in his hand.

"There's a lot you don't know about me and I guess with you going home you're not going to find out"

I could detect the flirtation in his voice as I mirrored his move and stared back at him.

"So why is this special to you?" I asked "since we're chatting"

He lay back down on the sand, staring into the sky.

"Are you ready for a lon
g
story"

"Yes" I replied, rolling onto my stomach and resting my chin on my hands.