And not a moment too soon. The big cat was already beginning to step through the opened doorway, a feral eagerness filling it. It didn’t mind that it wasn’t yet lunchtime, it would be glad to make a meal exception in Lorand’s case. It snarled when it felt him beginning to search out its muscle and nerve connections and then it tried to attack, but by then its movements were no longer under its own control. Lorand felt the sweat breaking out all over him from the need to use that much strength, but he didn’t lose his grip on the struggling animal.
Instead he began to direct its movements, forcing it to walk stiffly toward him. The rat he’d done the same thing with had hated and feared being treated like that, but its inner raging had been nothing compared to the puma’s. Lorand knew instant death awaited the least slip in control; for that reason his attention was glued to the procedure, to make certain there
were
no slips.
Walking the puma back to its building was almost harder than bringing it to a point just in front of him, but Lorand managed to do both. Once the big cat was inside he turned to look at the two Adepts, both of whom were staring white-faced through the bars.
“Close that door,” Lorand gritted out between his teeth, unable to release the puma until that was done. When Morin hesitated, Lorand managed to add, “If I find I’m about to die, I swear I’ll take you two with me.”
That, at least, prodded Morin into motion, and he hurried over to the lever and moved it back to its original position. That made the door begin to close, but it’s movement was much too slow. By the time Lorand was able to release the puma, exhausted was too mild a word for the way he felt.
“Now get this gate open,” he growled at Hestir, in no mood to play any more games. “This makes a full three masteries, and I want to hear you acknowledge it.”
“Of course, sir, of course,” Hestir babbled, releasing the latch on the gate before stumbling back a few steps. “The masteries are yours, along with your new designation. I’ll fetch your dins and bracelet immediately, while you refresh yourself at a table.”
“What bracelet?” Lorand asked as he stepped out of the cubicle, momentarily distracted from what he’d meant to say.
“It’s your master’s bracelet, which shows you to be a full participant rather than just an applicant,” Hestir answered as fast as possible, the look in his eyes one of terror. “Please, sir, about what was done … I’d like to explain—”
“Don’t bother,” Lorand interrupted, the growl still clear in his voice. “I don’t care why you two did what you did, the action isn’t one I mean to forgive. Go and get what you owe me, but don’t try to talk to me when you bring it.”
“Yes, sir,” Hestir quavered with a gulp, then he hurried off in the direction Morin had already taken. Lorand followed more slowly, and was able to ring a bell for a servant before he collapsed into a chair. When Hestir returned, Lorand might not be
able
to speak, so he’d made sure speaking would be unnecessary.
The servant came quickly to take his order, which included enough solid food to fill the mile-deep hollow Lorand felt in his middle. Eating and relaxing would restore him to a great extent, but after that he’d also need some sleep. Tomorrow would be soon enough to demand explanations, when he’d have enough strength to stand and listen to them.
Lorand had the odd feeling that he was being stared at, and when he raised his head to look around he discovered he was right. Eskin Drowd stood near one of the practice cubicles, and his stare was filled with amusement and ridicule. At a guess Drowd thought Lorand had failed, and was taking the opportunity to laugh at him.
And that would be the second best thing about the day, Lorand realized as he sat up a bit straighter. He’d gained the masteries that he needed, and now Drowd would see him step up another level above him. The look on the man’s face would be worth seeing and remembering, but right after that and his meal he would go directly back to the residence. As soon as he got the sleep he needed, he’d have to find out what was going on
now
…
CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR
For the first time in a long while Jovvi felt utterly depressed, and would have let the coach ride to the practice area go by in brooding silence. She’d said her goodbye to Lorand last night when she hadn’t really planned to say anything at all, and then she’d gone to her bedchamber and cried. Telling herself Lorand was just another man wasn’t working at all any longer, but there was nothing to be done about it. She simply couldn’t bring herself to depend on his being there if she needed him, and that was the one fault she found it impossible to overlook.
So she would have been happier to pass the ride in depressed silence, but Tamma’s presence refused to allow that. One minute the girl was projecting excited anticipation at the top of her emotional lungs, and the next it was outraged annoyance tinged with faint apprehension being projected. Jovvi couldn’t have ignored that combination even if there hadn’t been so much strength behind it, so after a few moments she admitted defeat with a sigh.
“All right, Tamma, tell me what’s bothering you,” she said wearily, drawing the girl’s attention. “If you don’t, we’ll probably both explode.”
“Oh, Jovvi, I’m sorry,” she answered, blushing a bit with fluster. “I didn’t realize you’d—But of course you would, so—I’ll try to stop.”
“You’ll try to stop feeling completely scattered and almost irrational?” Jovvi actually smiled at the thought, Tamma’s regret and concern for her coming through just as clearly as the rest. “I appreciate your wanting to try, but if you ever found a way to do it, you’d probably be able to take the Fivefold Throne by yourself. Tell me what’s causing the storm.”
“One of my plans came back to bite me,” Tamma admitted reluctantly after a short hesitation, now looking down at her hands. “Specifically the one to discourage Vallant Ro.”
“Oh, dear,” Jovvi said, then curiosity began to move aside her depression. “I knew it would be difficult to get anywhere with that man. What did you try?”
“Well, I remembered a comment you made about his probably not liking women who lay with other men,” she replied with a vague gesture. “I decided that that would be the most likely thing to discourage him, so I lay with Rion and then I told the beast Ro that I had too many gentlemen friends now, and apologized for leading him on. But then—”
“Wait!” Jovvi finally managed to get out through her shock, one hand up to halt Tamma’s flow of words. “I think I’d better take this one point at a time. You wanted to tell Vallant that you had a lot of gentlemen friends, so you lay with Rion. I seem to be having trouble understanding why that was necessary, since you can’t call him a large number, only one. What’s the difference between a complete lie and an almost complete one?”
“The difference…” Tamma echoed, looking more perplexed than embarrassed. “I suppose you could say the difference is mostly in me. If it had been a complete lie, I never would have been able to say it. It was hard enough saying it after the experience with Rion, but
that
bit of truth let me lie about the rest. And besides … if this thing about the competitions comes to nothing and you end up opening a residence for courtesans after all… I want to be able to contribute actively, not just watch everyone else do the work.”
“I see,” Jovvi said, which wasn’t quite true. And her brows were still raised so high they might never come down, which was partly due to being impressed. “To be honest, Tamma, I never expected you to accomplish quite so large a change in yourself. The effort must have been enormous, and I admire you for having been able to do it. I take it you benefited from lying with Rion?”
“Oh, yes,” Tamma answered with a smile that made her look even younger and more innocent. “He promised to give me nothing but pleasure, and he kept the promise. I was so nervous and even frightened, but he just kept on being gentle until I didn’t want him to be gentle anymore. That was when he gave me the pleasure.”
“Yes, that’s the way it’s supposed to work,” Jovvi said, intrigued in spite of herself. A man like Rion, with almost no experience of his own, shouldn’t have been able to produce that much enthusiasm in a woman like Tamma. When your experiences have been nothing but painful, even ordinary clumsiness can bring back hurtful memories and ruin the pleasure. If Tamma had felt nothing
but
pleasure, then Rion’s performance must have been almost extraordinary.
“Well, that’s the way it did work with Rion, but after that nothing went right,” Tamma said glumly, all exuberance suddenly gone. “I told Vallant the lie as best I could, and for a little while he seemed to believe me. Then he came over and told me how hurt he felt at being led on by me, and a moment later I found myself insisting that he tell me what I might do to make him feel less … despised and left out. I even promised to do it without first hearing what it was.”
“Oh, dear,” Jovvi said again, now fighting to keep from laughing. “Even in general it’s a bad idea to promise to do something without knowing what the something is, but with a man like Vallant… I think I already know what he asked for.”
“Everyone in the world but me would have known,” Tamma said, self-disgust tingeing the glumness. “When he thanked me for agreeing to lie with him, I suddenly understood that he’d been planning that outcome all along. I was absolutely furious, and I told him that I might have to lie with him, but I certainly didn’t have to talk to him.”
“And then you stormed back into the house,” Jovvi said with a nod. “I wondered what had happened this time, and now I know. It explains why you’re so annoyed, but there’s one emotion you’ve been projecting that you haven’t discussed yet. You may be furious over being tricked, but you’re also … anticipating the time, aren’t you?”
Jovvi had tried to put the question very gently, but Tamma still flinched on the inside.
“I’ve—come to the conclusion that lying with Rion might have been a mistake,” Tamma muttered, back to looking down at her hands. “As long as I thought of a man’s use as painful, I had a—a—barrier of sorts to protect me from Vallant. Now … all I can think about is how marvelous it will be with him, and I don’t want it to be marvelous. If it is…”
“If it is, you’ll find it painful in the extreme to keep from becoming involved with him,” Jovvi said, at least understanding
that
part of it perfectly. “So what are you going to do? Tell him that his having tricked you means you don’t have to keep your part of the bargain?”
“It was a promise, not a bargain, and he offered to tell me what he wanted before I gave my word to do it,” Tamma responded, the glumness having deepened. “I was the one who insisted on giving my word first, so now I have to keep it. In one way I hate the idea, but in another…”
This time Jovvi simply nodded, the point much too familiar to need discussing. She’d always remember the time she’d shared with Lorand, and that was a good part of the trouble. If only she were able to forget, she might find it possible to believe that she’d turned her back on a man no different from any of the others she’d known…
The rest of the ride went by in silence, and once again Tamma was the first to get out. Jovvi simply readied herself until the coach reached her own stop, and then she got out and entered the practice area. There were more people present than there’d been yesterday morning, but all of them were sitting at tables and drinking tea. No one seemed to be watching the practice buildings, waiting for people to come out so that they might take their turn, and somehow that wasn’t surprising.
“Good morning, Dama Hafford,” Jovvi heard as Genovir, her Adept guide, suddenly appeared beside her. The tall woman was apparently trying to smile, but the result looked far from natural. “I hope you had a pleasant, restful time after leaving here yesterday.”
“I certainly did,” Jovvi replied with her own smile, then she looked around. “I don’t see Adept Algus. He does have to join us for the testing, doesn’t he?”
“You’re already prepared to continue?” Genovir said, still maintaining that forced smile despite the—lurching distress—Jovvi was momentarily able to feel in her. “We expected you to practice a bit first… I’ll fetch Algus at once. Please feel free to sit and have tea while I do so.”
Genovir turned and hurried away, leaving Jovvi with the impression that the larger woman’s balance was on the verge of coming apart. Under other circumstances that would seem curious, but with the testing authority involved the reaction felt more suspicious. Those people were up to something, and the something wasn’t likely to be to her benefit.
Jovvi considered taking the suggestion about tea, but old habits made her decide to sit down and simply wait. As a child she’d learned better than to eat or drink near people who couldn’t be trusted, especially not when those people had access to what she would be eating or drinking. She remembered that very pretty young boy who had roamed the same part of the city that Jovvi and her brothers had. The three of them had watched the boy accept food and drink from a smiling stranger, and afterward they’d never seen the boy again…
After a few minutes Genovir reappeared with Algus, both of them coming from the second small practice building. Their pace was less hurried than Genovir’s departure had been, but there was a definite …
determination
to the tall, thin man’s stride. Jovvi wondered about that, but as soon as the two reached the place she sat, it was no longer necessary to wonder.
“Well, good morning, Dama Hafford,” Algus said in an attempt to sound jolly. “Genovir tells me you’re ready to try for the next masteries, which is fine. But I must insist that you pause for a cup of tea first, which will help to relax you. It would distress me to see you faint from your efforts.”
“That’s very kind of you, sir, but unnecessary,” Jovvi said as she rose, interrupting Algus in the process of reaching for a bell rope. “Since I haven’t fainted yet and have no intention of doing so in the future,
I
must insist that we get on with the testing. Once I’ve achieved the masteries, I’ll take a cup of tea as my reward.”