“No.”
“I thought all Americans married at twenty-one and had dozens of children.”
“I'm divorced.”
“You must tell me what went wrong. I collect misalliances. It's helpful as well as amusing.”
“My wife talked baby talk to me. I couldn't stand it.”
“Why didn't you simply tell her to stop?”
“I didn't think she wouldâor could. She was a Jewish princess.”
“You mean she was spoiled by indulgent parents.”
“That's part of it.”
“I had parents like that. You should have been more understanding, compassionate.”
He shook his head. “She made me realize I didn't want a Jewish wife.”
“Why not?”
“That's hard to explain. My grandfather went to his grave in 1939 believing German anti-Semitism was a passing thing, a minor flaw in a nation that had produced the greatest music, the greatest literature, the greatest philosophy of modern times.”
“My grandfatherâand my fatherâbelieved the same thing,” Amalie Borne said.
“I want to prove to myselfâand perhaps to othersâthat Jews can be Americans firstânow that Germany's failed them.”
“Fascinating,” Amalie Borne said.
For the first time, Dick felt he had gotten her attention. It was also the first time he had ever tried to explain his feelings about Jewishness in such detail to anyoneâincluding himself.
Amalie held out her glass for more champagne. “But ultimately perhaps as foolish as the dream of German assimilation?”
“Perhaps. But people in the plane business like to live dangerously.”
The fishy, garlicky odor of bouillabaisse began to fill the apartment. Annette opened a table before the sunny windows and they sat down to steaming dishes of it, with a Puligny Montrachet which Annette opened with a flourish that made Dick ashamed of his struggle with the champagne. They discussed recent German literature, notably the Catholic novelist Heinrich Böll, whom Amalie urged Dick to read. “Among his many virtues, he never was and never will be a Nazi,” she said.
The wine flowed and Dick asked her how she came to Paris. For a moment she seemed to ponder what to tell him.
“An American general brought me hereâand left me when his wife arrived, after the war. For a while I almost starved. Then I met Madame George and began my ascent. I'm now as spoiled as my father ever dreamt of making me. Somewhere I like to think he's smiling.”
“Considering what you went through during the war, you're entitled,” Dick said.
She laughed and his body almost dissolved. It was more than her beauty, it was the mystery, the aura of hidden pain that surrounded her. Absurd romantic ideas crowded Dick's brain. He would rescue her from the degradation of one-night stands with macho slobs like Gumpert. He would take her to America, convince her it was a refuge she could trust.
Over dessert of
profiteroles au chocolat,
Amalie proclaimed their mission for the afternoon: to see Heinrich Heine's Paris. Germany's greatest romantic poet had lived in the City of Light for the last twenty-five years of his life in protest against the anti-Semitism and conservative politics that kept him in a frenzy of ambivalence about his fatherland.
They began with a stroll down the Champs Elysées, the poet's favorite boulevard, where he and his friend Balzac used to parade arm in arm. Then a taxi whirled them to the site of the glove shop in the narrow Passage Choiseul where Heine had met Mathilde, the nineteen-year-old peasant girl who would dominateâand ultimately destroyâhis life. “I come here often to try to understand the way fate waylays a man,” Amalie said.
“He loved her.”
“He loved a great many women. Too many. Mathilde was woman's revenge. She was all body and no mind.”
Another taxi took them to streets where the poet and Mathilde had livedâRue d'Amsterdam, the Grande Rue des Batignolles, the Avenue Matignon, where he died. In each site, Amalie meditated on Heine's erratic, erotic life. Gradually Dick saw him looming over her, part guardian angel, part idol, part threat.
“He was an old-fashioned romantic,” Dick said as Amalie recalled the poet's last love affair with the adventuress he called Mouche.
“What does that mean, exactly?”
“He fell in love with almost every woman he met.”
“We moderns don't believe in love?”
“Not that effervescent kind. We're more inclined to make distinctions. Sex is not the same as love.”
“How profound. Tell me more, Mr. Stone.”
Confused by her sudden hostility, Dick blundered on. “Weâwe Americans anywayâbelieve in falling in love with one womanâand hoping the love will grow deeper and richer and more powerful as life goes on. For romantics falling was the most important part of love. I prefer the American approach.”
“That's so naive,” she said, looking up at the sagging shutters and crooked windows of the half-dozen nineteenth-century houses still standing on the Avenue Matignon. Once more Dick sensed he had gotten her attention.
“I don't know,” he said. “At the end, didn't Heine wail,
âWorte, Worte, keine Taten!'
âwords, words, no deeds. That's the verdict on romanticism in my opinion.”
“You don't understand romanticismâor me!” she said, springing out of the taxi and striding down the street.
In his bad French, Dick told the driver to pursue her.
They kept pace with Amalie while he leaned out the window, reciting the rest of Heine's disillusioned cry:
“Immer Geist und keinen Braten/ keine Knödel in der Suppe.
ӉAlways spirit and no roast, no dumplings in the soup.
“You're disgusting,” she said. “Disgusting and naive.”
“How about dinner at Verfours tonight?”
“I'm engaged.”
“Tomorrow night?”
“Don't you have airplanes to worry about?”
“They can wait. I've fallen in love with you. But I want to get beyond Heine.”
“There's nothing beyond him. There never will be!”
They continued to creep along beside the striding defiant Amalie for another block, while other taxis and cars beeped angrily behind them. Dick cheerfully recited more Heine. “
Lass mich mit gluhnden Zangen kneipen, Lass grausam schinden mein Gesicht.
” Let me be pinched with red hot tongs, let my face be flayed from my skull, only do not make me wait any longer.
As they approached the Champs Elysees, Amalie's frown vanished. When he tried
“Noch einmal, eh mein Lebenslicht,”
in which the poet prayed that before his “life's light” was extinguished, he would be blessed once more by a woman's love, she capitulated and got back in the cab. They did not say a word all the way back to her apartment. As she got out she said: “What time, at Verfours?”
Verfours said a reservation was
impossible
. A face-to-face conference with the headwaiter and 150 dollars created a table. On the way back to his hotel, Dick realized he was supposed to be at a reception for Buchanan Aircraft at the West German embassy. He arrived as the party was breaking up. General Gumpert was still there, however, and was impossible to avoid.
“That was a fascinating creature you found for me last night, Dick,” he said. “She spoke better German than I did, in spite of being born in Corsica.”
“We thought you'd find her interesting, General,” Dick said. “Will you be seeing her again?”
“We were supposed to go to Verfours tonight but she's ill.”
“Too bad.”
“You've heard about the new crashes? The newspapers are going to crucify us, I'm afraid.”
“I believe it was one of Germany's aeronautic pioneers who said sacrifices must be expected.”
“Does that include my career?” Gumpert said.
“I hope not, General.”
Behind his soothing manner, Dick was thinking:
Fuck you, you Nazi bastard.
He was appalled. Did Amalie Borne have something to do with it? Had she reawakened a primitive Jewish identity in his soul?
Prince Carlo materialized to rescue Dick, an irony in itself. Dick instinctively disliked this urbane aristocrat. The Prince put his arm around Gumpert's shoulder. “Never be discouraged by a defeat in love, General. Tonight we'll go to a little place I have in the country, where complaisance is guaranteed. Would you care to join us, Stone?”
“NoâI have a previous engagement.”
That could easily get him fired from Buchanan Aircraft.
The Prince walked him to the door, sighing over the problems of the Scorpion. He was going to need more moneyâa great deal moreâto deal with it. Adrian Van Ness had authorized another draft of three million dollars. Would Dick see that it was deposited in the Swiss account tomorrow?
Dick fled to his hotel for a hasty shower and a dash to Verfours, where Amalie awaited him at their table, chatting with the headwaiter in flawless French. They were apparently old friends. After champagne cocktails, they feasted on truffles and pheasant under glass and a raspberry tart whose crust seemed mostly air.
Amalie insisted on hearing more about Dick's love life. Mixing irony and humor, he described the liaisons, the weekend flings, the one night stands of the Manhattan Beach aeronauts. He portrayed them as delayed adolescentsâand did not mention Cassie Trainor.
“Now, like Heine when he encountered Mathilde, you're weary with debauchery and long for the simple affection of an unspoiled heart?” Amalie asked.
“You could say that. But I wish you wouldn't.”
“How fortunate that we met,” Amalie said. “Perhaps I'm was wrong about fate being a dark presence in our lives.”
After dinner they lingered over a forty-year-old brandy Amalie selected. Dick tried not to look at the bill as he handed the waiter his American Express card. It probably exceeded his salary for the month.
They rode back to the Faubourg St. Germain through the mostly deserted midnight streets. A soft rain had fallen while they dined; the macadam gleamed beneath the lampposts. At the apartment, Amalie fumbled for her key and Dick stood by the cab, wondering if he should pay the fare. “Ten francs,
s'il vous plait,
” the driver rasped, perhaps trying to tell him that any Frenchman who escorted a woman this beautiful to her apartment would follow her upstairs if he had to climb the facade.
Dick paid him as the heavy door groaned open. “I have more of that brandy,” Amalie said.
He kissed her as they walked into her apartment. She did not resist, but she did not respond, either. “It's all wrong,” she whispered. “You must know that.”
“I only know I love you.”
“Shhh. Annette doesn't approve of you.”
“Why not?”
“You're too young. You can't possibly be rich enough.”
“I'm not.”
“Oh. Can't you see, can't you hear?”
“I only see a beautiful woman who doesn't believe in American love.”
“
âLieb Liebchen, leg's Händchen aufs Herze mein.'
Do you know that verse?”
“Yes,” Dick said. It was the Heine poem that had resounded in his head over Schweinfurt, about a lover's hammering heart becoming a psychic coffin.
“That's the literal truth about me.
Nicht worte, worte.
The truth.”
“
âTobende eile mich treibend erfasst,'
” Dick murmured, kissing her neck.
A wild unrest is desolating me,
another line from one of Heine's cries of romantic despair. Did he mean it? Was she using the other line to tell him of a twentieth-century despair? Dick only knew he could not retreat now. She was mystery and memory, Jewishness and the guilt of the navigator of the
Rainbow Express.
He pressed his lips against her pulsing throat and she seemed to crumple against him. The straight firm body dissolved into helplessness, sadness.
Undressed in the shadowy lamplight, she was a landscape, a country of love. A flat soft stomach descended to full thighs, ascended to coned breasts. She reached out to him like a plaintive child as he lay down beside her.
“Kommt, kommt,
” she whispered.
“Kommt feins liebchen heut.”
Come, come, come sweet love today. It was from the first verse of one of Heine's most famous song cycles.
Entering her was the most profound moment of Dick Stone's life. He felt like a conqueror of space and time, returning to the old world in his grandfather's name with a new and bolder love for it, an American love that could both master and transform its tormented history. Amalie gave herself without reservation, shuddering, sighing, almost sobbing and at the climax retreating into a dark silence, to emerge with a small final cry.