Crossing Boundaries (Cape Falls) (12 page)

The true answer is, I didn’t know and to be honest, I didn’t care. For once in my life I’m happy and I don’t want that to change.

Dear Diary,

Dean has been quiet lately. It’s the anniversary of his wife and child's death. I booked time off from the library and went with him to their resting place. He broke down and my heart broke for him. I knew then that he wasn’t over them. Would he ever have a place for me in his heart? I know he cares, but does he love me?

What am I supposed to do?

Dear Diary

Today Dean asked me what I wanted to do and I did it, Diary. I handed him the book he’d given me, where I had marked the pages for what I wanted to try. For days I’d been thinking about Dean being my Master.

He sat and read the pages. “You’re sure?” he asked.

I spoke no words. Instead, I gave a nod of my head, a simple movement.

Oh God, it was fantastic. Nothing could have prepared me for what happened next.

Recreating the scene from Surrendering to Her Master:

“
Remove your clothes, Laura,” Dean ordered.

I did. In no time at all my clothes were on the floor.

Dean got up from his computer and walked over to me. He circled me. Seconds ticked by and my anticipation grew. How could any woman stop themselves from talking?

“
Do you want me, Laura?” he asked.

“
Yes, Master,” I replied. Calling him Master felt so right.

“
Kneel and show me how much you want to please me.”

I went to my knees and still didn’t say a word. In the book, Lisa bowed her head and I copied the writing.

“
You look beautiful and submissive. What should I do with you?” he asked.

“
Reward me, Master.” I answered.

“
Did I give you permission to speak?”

“
No, Master.”

“
Five lashings for you. Get up and lean over the back of the sofa.”

I got up and rested my stomach on the back of the sofa, my hands holding onto the edge, placing my ass up in the air.

Like in the book, Dean ran his hands all over my ass.

I shook with excitement. Dean was going to punish me. Should wanting to submit to the man I love repulse me? I couldn’t think of a single reason to say no.

His hand landed smartly on one ass cheek and I yelped. The second followed by the third, fourth and fifth. Tears stung my eyes and he soothed a hand over the red flesh. My ass felt warm and hot.

“
Are you going to speak without permission?” he asked.

“
No, Master.”

“
Good. Kneel,” he commanded.

Without questioning him, I got to my knees before him and he played with my hair. I’d kept the length loose, as I wanted to be prepared for our time together.

“
Look at me,” he said.

I looked up and my eyes strayed to his hands on his belt. I watched as he unbuckled his belt and dropped his jeans.

“
Open those pretty lips,” he told me.

I opened my lips and he drove his cock into my mouth. My fingers went to his thighs and as he pushed his cock to the back of my throat, I took all of him in. He didn’t give me time to get prepared for what was happening. When he pulled out, he surged right back inside, going even deeper. I couldn’t stop gagging, and he went slower as he got deeper.

The trust I felt with him baffled me. I felt in my heart and mind that I could trust him. Dean wouldn’t do anything to hurt me. I know this and it gave me power. Filled me with the need to please him.

Once I pleasured him enough, he pulled his shaft out of my mouth and pulled me up with a tight grip on my arm. Not painful. He bent me over the edge of the sofa and thrust his cock inside my wet cunt. I was soaking wet. The tops of my thighs would be glistening with my arousal.

“
Fuck. Tell me, Laura, tell me you want me to fuck you,” he ordered.

Laura knew in that instant that Dean couldn’t take his pleasure from her without her permission.

“
Fuck me, Dean,” I whispered.

“
Tell me to fuck you hard and fast.”

“
Fuck me hard. Make me burn,” I told him.

He rammed inside my pussy and fucked me harder than any other time. Dean is a considerate lover and his fingers found my clit as he fucked me from behind. The mating was pure and carnal. I couldn’t stop screaming as a hand landed on my ass. I knew the scene from his book was changing with our own needs and desires. We didn’t need to follow a book to be turned on.

In seconds of him touching my clit I was climaxing. The longest and hardest one I’d ever felt. His cock went deeper, fucking against my cervix. The point between pleasure and pain became blurred. His hands went to my shoulders and he held on as he fucked me. Growls, flesh slapping and moans echoed round the walls of the office. Unlike the book, he didn’t pull out. Dean pushed inside me and climaxed, washing my womb with his seed. He pulsed inside me for the longest time. Not pulling away.

Something had changed. I felt it in the air. I didn’t know what it was, but I knew it was there. He finally pulled out of my body and, in my heart and body, I felt him draw away from me.

Dear Diary,

Dean has gone. He said he couldn’t take me with him because of my work and this was his own work he had to do.

I don’t know what I’ve done. Dean told me not to worry and said he’d give me a call when he’s ready to see me or when he gets back. I don’t know what I’ve done wrong. He assured me that nothing was wrong.

Dean said he had finished his book and needed to go and see his editor. I didn’t know authors had to constantly see their editors in person. He told me once that the ideal of being an e-book writer is that he could stay at home and email his manuscripts and that seeing his editor was only essential at pinnacle points in the year, like a convention or meeting or something. I guess the rules change to suit him.

Chapter Fourteen

Laura hadn’t heard from Dean in a few days and she wasn’t in a good mood. In between stacking books and talking to Peter, she thought about the last time they’d been together. She couldn’t find anything that would have made him upset.

Laura stopped. She had half a day, as it was Friday, and her bag lay on the table. The main librarian had told her to finish putting the books back in the reference section and then she could go for the day.

“Peter, I told you I don’t want that,” she said and placed the final book on the shelf.

“All I’m asking is for a chance. A chance to prove to you I’m not an insensitive jerk,” he pleaded.

She hated herself. Why had she thought that she and Peter could just be friends without Peter expecting something from her in return?

“It’s nothing personal," she replied. "I don’t want to explore that side of things with you.”

“Is there someone else?” he asked getting to his feet.

Laura hesitated for a split second. Dean was the main man and only man she wanted in her life. Telling Peter about him would be a big mistake.

“Don’t be silly,” she denied.

“Why did you have to think about it?” he argued.

“For God sake, Peter. I’m tired. There isn’t another man in my life and I don’t want to have dinner with you.” She grabbed her bag with force, placed it on her shoulder and moved toward the exit.

Laura growled and stormed upstairs. She needed to get her own place. Being at home was stifling her. She was twenty years old and a grown woman. She collapsed on her bed and waited for the day to be over. It was Friday and she didn’t want to go anywhere; except to the one place unavailable to her.

* * * *

Peter watched her leave, again. He always said the wrong thing. Nothing he did seemed to help in any way. He grabbed his stuff and turned to leave the library, stumbling on a book on the floor. To catch himself from falling, he dropped his own books in a pile. He’d started bringing some work to do while waiting for her.

He cursed and picked up the books. When he placed all of his in a pile he saw a plain brown book. He opened up the first page and saw Laura’s name. A quick flick threw the pages he saw her writing on most of the pages. He slammed the book closed. This book was her diary, her personal thoughts. Reading the pages would be an invasion of her privacy. Unable to resist the pull of knowing more about the woman he cared about, Peter opened to the first entry. His heart stopped and, for the first time in his life, he knew what it felt like to be heart broken.

The library closed and he spent the rest of the weekend reading her diary.

Chapter Fifteen

Monday morning shone bright as ever and Laura couldn’t find her diary. She’d booked the shift for Monday. The whole weekend she’d looked everywhere for it. Shrugging, she had her breakfast and walked to work.

Her day went by slowly and half way through Dean phoned her at the library. He told her he got home safely and he’d see her soon. She felt better and was pleased she could get home by four. The library didn’t stay open late on a Monday. Peter didn’t show and she was pleased.

When it came to closing time, Laura rushed out of the library looking forward to meeting with Dean. He hadn’t told her he wanted to see her, but she wanted to see him. She spent most of her time thinking about him and wanted nothing more than to spend all of her spare time at his house. Over the weekend she hadn’t thought about anything but seeing him again. She wanted to understand why he’d backed off. She loved being with Dean.

Laura stopped as she saw Peter paused by his truck and staring back at her.

“What’s the matter?” she asked and went over to see him.

Peter didn’t do or say anything, just stared at her. The car park was full with shoppers. The noise was a distraction. Laura started to feel uneasy as he simply stared at her.

“You’re starting to scare me with the intense stare you’ve got going ...” Her words stopped when he pulled out her diary. In an instant she understood the look and she reached out to grab the book from his fingers.

“Where did you get this?”

“You dropped it in the library on Friday,” he replied.

Laura placed the book into her bag. Her heart pounded against her chest. She glanced up into his eyes and she knew her thoughts were no longer private.

“You’ve read my diary?”

Peter looked away and Laura, mortified and scared, glanced around the car park. No one looked their way. She stared at Peter and didn’t know what to say. Instead she stormed away, the accusation she saw in his eyes was more than she could bear. Her time with Dean was hers. Everyone took her time. Her parents and Peter, even Dean took her time. The diary was hers and he’d read it.

Laura didn’t want to think about what he’d do with her information. She was scared and wanted to go and see Dean first. Would he call it all off? After his time away and the withdrawal of the past few days, she didn’t know how he felt. She knew he still had feelings for his wife. He wore his wedding band even when they were together.

Peter reached out and grabbed her arm, stopping her progress. They then walked for several minutes before stopping on the sidewalk in town. When a car passed them he took her behind one of the main buildings and pushed her against the hard wall.

The privacy for their conversation was welcome. Tears were close to the surface. She wanted to run home and weep. Going to see Dean after he’d told her not to would be a mistake. He hadn’t arranged for her to come to his place and had asked her to wait until he called her. Before he left she was free to go to his house at every chance. Dean was already placing restrictions and she didn’t have the time to think about it.

“How much did you read?”

“All of it.”

She felt a blush spread through her cheeks and she couldn’t stop the outrage. More than her privacy had been invaded, every part of her time with Dean had been shared with him.

“I hate you,” she growled and pushed against his hold.

Peter grabbed her hands and pinned them by her head. She couldn’t move and her frustration at being overpowered was evident as the tears she'd tried to hold back burst forth.