We ended up back in his bed—to rest this time. He curled his body around mine, his chest pressed against my back. We had stayed silent like that for a while before he spoke up. “I’m crazy about you, Mac. I hope you know that.”
I smiled to myself. “I know.” And I did. He’d made that perfectly clear since day one. But hearing him say it now, somehow felt different.
“I don’t know what it was about you, but when I first saw you that night—I just knew I needed to know you. Something drew me to you.”
I turned and faced him, throwing a leg over his, and intertwining our bodies together. “Would that something be alcohol and poor judgment?”
“Do you always have to be a smart ass?”
“No, not always.” I smiled as he leaned in and kissed me. “So…” I inquired. “Do you think you’d be a chef if the circumstances were different?”
He narrowed his brows at me, obviously thrown off by my misplaced question. “I like to think I would’ve pursued it had the option been available.”
“And why wasn’t it?” I asked, not understanding why it was labeled negatively. “You love to cook. At one point, you considered it. What happened?”
He swallowed, his face tightening. “Do we really have to talk about this? It’s in the past. It was something I wanted years ago. There’s nothing I can do about it now.”
I drew my brows at him, curling my lip up on one side. “You’re the same age as I am…it’s not like you can’t change careers. I mean, if that was something you really wanted.”
He shook his head. “It doesn’t matter. It’d never be allowed.” I knew he was talking about William and that
he’d
never allow it, but it didn’t make sense to me. If being a chef was frowned upon, no wonder he’d been urging me to quit my job. Being in fashion was a joke to him.
“That’s bullshit, Alex.”
“Well, when your life is pre-planned out and all financial stability is controlled for you, it leaves limited options. You do what you have to do to keep little control that’s left. So in order to keep up the Lancaster name, I studied politics and business. At least that way, I can initially choose which position I want to get into.”
“Are you looking for jobs now?” I asked, curious as to what his future plans were.
“Yes, I’ve networked with peers and have interviews lined up through the month, starting next week. Being a ‘Lancaster legacy’ at least gives me opportunities most people my age wouldn’t even be able to touch. So, it comes with benefits, I suppose.”
“Boring benefits,” I added, smirking just enough so he knew I was messing with him.
“I know. But either way, at least I’ll have a job and can move out. Because, I’m pretty sure I’m going to need my own place pretty soon.” He looked down at me, neither of us wanting to talk about how this will change everything. We both knew it; we just weren’t sure what actions needed to take place. At least, I didn’t. There was no way I could sleep in the same bed with William and not tell him. There wouldn’t be enough time to find a place of my own, but I knew Staci would let me crash with her until I figured it out.
“I’m telling William when he gets home,” I began. “I’m just not sure how.” I shrugged. It stung a little saying it aloud, but I knew we needed some kind of plan. We’d both be kicked out and with the media ready to run any story that revolved around William, we’d need to be as quiet about it as possible.
He cupped my jaw and brushed his lips against mine. He told me a thousand things in just that one kiss. Hope. Faith. Strength.
“Will you tell me about your mom?” I asked nervously, sucking in my lower lip. “William would never tell me much.” I felt him inhale a deep breath against me, his eyes peering up at the ceiling. I could tell I hit a nerve, so I wasn’t going to force him to talk about it. “It’s all right. We don’t have to talk about her,” I said softly.
“No, it’s not that. I love talking about her. I just…there’s a lot people don’t know. I’ve had to keep it all a secret and…it’s the reason my dad and I don’t get along very well.”
I sat up and leaned against the bed frame. His face was so tense and his eyes stayed low. I could tell this wasn’t easy for him, but I was glad he was willing to talk about it.
“What is it?” I prompted.
He met my gaze and I could see the pain in his eyes. There was an underlining reason behind him and William’s relationship—I always knew there was—but William would never tell me anything. That man was apparently full of secrets.
“She didn’t have cancer…it’s what he told the media, but it was a lie.”
“What?” I gasped. “Did her family know?”
“He paid them all off.” He scowled. “He pays everyone off to keep up his reputation.”
What?
It took me a minute to absorb his words, to come to terms with the fact that the man I had planned to marry was not the man I thought he was. “Why hadn’t you ever told me before? Surely, that would’ve grabbed my attention much earlier.”
“You wouldn’t have believed me then. I knew if I told you before, you would’ve thought I was lying, just to say it so you’d leave him for me.” I didn’t argue with that, it was true. I probably would’ve accused him of making it up just to get me in bed with him.
“So…how has he been able to get you to keep a secret all this time? I mean, what’s stopping you from running to the press with it?”
He sighed, obviously upset over the whole thing. “Honestly…my trust fund. He holds it against me, only gives me enough each month to survive until the next. He never fully signed it over to me, and without it, I wouldn’t have been able to finish school. That’s why I had to move in here until I found a job.”
“Yeah, he seemed awfully glad you were staying. Even said he expected you to stay for a year.”
“That’s because he knows once I move out and can support myself, I could easily share all the Lancaster secrets. But he’d just find something else to hold against me.” He shrugged, looking defeated. “He knows it’d ruin my name too, once I do find a job. It’d be a ripple effect. He’s made sure of that.”
“Wow…” My eyes widened in shock. I could hardly believe the words he was saying. William had been good at deceiving me, at letting me believe everything he was saying was truthful. “I’ve been pretty naive,” I said aloud. “I had no idea.”
“It’s not your fault, Mac. He’s a professional. He’s made lying his career to get what he wants from people and to keep it that way. He’s a master manipulator.”
I swallowed, my body shaking with the realization that I’d been with someone I hadn’t truly known. I felt sick.
“Are you okay?”
I shook my head, not really knowing if I was or not. “I will be,” I reassured him. “Once this is out in the open, and I don’t feel trapped by his lies anymore. What about you?”
“What about me?”
“What will you do about your trust fund? Aren’t you worried?”
He shrugged. “Since meeting you, the only thing I’ve been worried about is losing you. I knew I wouldn’t make it here a year, living with you, watching you marry him, so I’ve been putting money away in an account he has no idea about. It’s not much, but it’ll hold me over until I find a job.”
I flashed a small smile of relief at him. “Are you afraid he’ll somehow jeopardize your chances of getting a job?” I asked nervously. “It’s obvious he has a lot of connections.”
“No, I haven’t really thought about it. But I don’t think he would…he’ll have to play fair if he wants certain things kept out of the public.” The thought sent an anxious shiver down my body. I hated that William had secrets I knew nothing about. But it didn’t matter anymore.
He held me in his arms, keeping our bodies close and secure. I hadn’t realized until now how safe I felt in his arms. His body towered over mine, making me feel comforted and secure.
“So, can you tell me the truth about your mom? Strictly out of curiosity…I can tell she meant a lot to you.”
I felt him exhale before speaking up. “I was pretty young, so Dad and Mom didn’t think I knew what was going on, but I did. She grew up in a high-society lifestyle like the one they were raising me in and she was unhappy about it. She begged him to move to the suburbs, to work less, to be home more. She was lonely. She’d spend days in bed, not talking to anyone. Dad said he’d go to therapy with her, to work out their ‘issues,’ but he constantly canceled on her for work. A work meeting. A conference. Something always came up and she felt less and less important to him. She started getting more active in the community, organizing events, charities, networking with other women. You could tell getting involved made her happy. She still made sure to spend time with me, be home when I arrived home from school. One day, the nanny picked me up from school because I had been feeling sick. The school called her since both of my parents were usually busy during the day. The nanny tucked me in bed and said she was running out to get me some medicine. Before she even left, I heard her screaming.” He paused, inhaling a deep breath. His eyes were closed, memories floating around in his mind before he continued. “I rushed out of bed and found why she had been screaming.” He kept his eyes closed, breathing out in slow, calculated breaths.
I braced myself, ready to hear the words, but they never came. A slam of the front door startled us both, making us jump. “Oh my god,” I whispered in panic. “William’s home!”
William never came home early from business trips, which made my heart race at an uncontrollable rate. It was possible he’s called to let me know, but I hadn’t even checked my phone since early that morning when I messaged Chelsea and let her know I wouldn’t be coming into work today.
“He can’t find us like this!” I jumped out of his bed, searching for anything to throw over my body.
“Mac, calm down—” He put a hand out to me, but I ignored it. “He’s going to find out anyway.”
“Not like this!” I hissed. “I wanted to tell him in a more respectful way.” Although now knowing what Alex told me, he didn’t really deserve that. But still, I didn’t want him finding us now and kicking us both out before we had a chance to make any plans.
“Okay, just relax,” he soothed, embracing me in his arms. “He’d expect me to be home, not you. So you stay in here and I’ll go check it out.” I nodded, too shaken up to respond. He kissed the top of my head and slowly opened the door, closing it gently behind him.
I found a pair of his boxer shorts and put them on. I sat on the edge of the bed, waiting anxiously for him to come back. I listened for voices, for any kind of evidence, but he returned quietly before I heard any.
“It’s just the maid,” he whispered, relief washing over me as I collapsed on the bed. “She comes every Wednesday afternoon,” he explained, which I knew, but obviously forgot.
“Shit,” I breathed out, waiting for my heart to stop pounding in my chest.
“Guess that means you’ll have to hide out in here until she’s gone.” He smirked, walking over toward me.
“That will take hours,” I groaned, but not really upset about it.
“Well…we’ll just have to find something to preoccupy ourselves.” He leaned over me, placing his hands on the bed next to me. His face inches away from mine, his lips lightly brushed mine.
“I’m sure you’ll think of something.”
And he did.
The maid finally left before dinner. Thankfully, she was a quick worker and we were hardly home to really make a mess anyway. Alex and I ordered in and sat on the couch watching movies. It was the perfect glimpse of what we could be—of what it could be with him. I knew in less than twenty-four hours, everything in my life was going to change.
I wanted to soak up as much of this as I could.
“What’s your favorite movie?” I asked, grabbing a handful of popcorn.
“Anything with Terminator.”
I snorted. “Of course.”
“And yours? Something cheesy? Flowers and romance? Rainbows and kittens?”
I narrowed my brows at him, laughing. “Not exactly.”
“Then what?” he prompted.
I hesitated before responding, “Con Air.”
“You’re lying.”
“I’m not!” I nudged him in the ribs. “There weren’t many options.” He looked over at me, curiosity in his eyes. “Growing up in shelters. We only got to watch movies that were donated or from the library. And it’s not like my mom would ever spend the money to go to a theater. My first time going was when I was nineteen. But Con Air was one of those movies I could watch over and over again. I loved the action. And since the shelters were blended with teens, men, and women, there weren’t many options that appealed to the majority. So basically, I grew up on war movies, action, and thrillers.” I smiled nervously in return.
“Well, at least it’s a decent movie. We’d have to renegotiate this whole thing if it were something else like…Casablanca.” He chuckled, obviously amused with himself. I just shook my head and smiled at him.
“I didn’t watch a lot of romance movies, but I always loved the ending when he finally makes it home and meets his daughter for the first time. I cried every time that dang song,
How Do I Live,
started playing.”
“Well, that explains a lot at least.” He grinned.
“What’s that mean?”
“Nothing bad,” he reassured. “Just that most girls always have a preconceived notion of what love and romance are supposed to be about.”
I didn’t grow up having any kind of notions of what love was supposed to be about. I didn’t read romance novels, or get sucked into Nicholas Spark movies, or have girlfriends to gossip with. I met friends in my fashion marketing classes and a couple from work, but by then, it was almost too late. The couple of guys I had met before William couldn’t hold a candle to him. He was so powerful, so intriguing compared to the rest, that I was immediately fascinated with him.
“Well, it’s safe to say I didn’t know much.” I frowned, but he immediately lifted my chin up to greet my lips.
I meant to ask him the rest of his story of his mom, but we ended up passing out on the couch together. His arms tangled around me, and I was helpless to move.
It was the first time since meeting Alex that I wanted to stay exactly as we were.
THE SMELL OF
coffee woke me early the next morning. I was still on the couch, but Alex was gone. I assumed he was the one making coffee, and after hearing my stomach growl, hopefully, breakfast, too.
I threw the blanket off and noticed the sun was just rising, which meant I’d have to get in the shower and get ready for work soon. William was scheduled to return some time tonight, and I wasn’t exactly sure how I planned to handle it.
I decided I should probably pack a bag just in case I needed to crash at Staci’s on a whim.
I found Alex in the kitchen, mixing a bowl of pancake batter in his perfect Alex form. Wild, messy locks, shirtless in only a pair of sweats that lay low on his hips, and a half weeks’ worth of stubble. No wonder my body’s reaction to him was potent. But getting to know Alex’s softer side, his background, and true personality—those were the traits worth risking everything for.
“Good morning, beautiful,” he said as I continued staring, taking him all in. He finally looked up at me and smiled. “You know…” he began as he started heating up the griddle, “you’re free to stare from over here, too.” He nodded his head toward the stool at the breakfast bar.
“Are you always a smart ass in the morning? I’m starting to notice a pattern,” I mocked, walking up to the counter and grabbing the carafe and a cup from the cupboard.
“It’s the natural Alex Lancaster charm.” He came up behind me and wrapped his arms around my waist, pressing his chest into my back. I laughed in amusement as he brought his head down and began kissing the length of my neck up to my ear. “Are you sure you can’t play hooky just one more day?”
I groaned at how amazing his lips felt on me, his hands finding their way to my panty line. “I wish.” I let my head fall back on his shoulders as his lips assaulted the flesh just below my lobe.
“You’re going to burn your hand if you keep pouring…” His breath tickled my ear, and I realized I was still pouring hot coffee into my cup. I set it down just in time, almost spilling it all over the counter.
“And you’re going to make me extremely late if you keep this up…” But I didn’t make any attempts to move, not just yet.
“Well…that’s kind of my plan.”
I finally broke free and turned around to face him. He was simply adorable, his eyes soft, his smile wide and charming. “You’re making it very hard to make the right choice here,” I groaned, wrapping my arms around his neck and pulling him toward me.
He closed the distance and kissed me, slow and passionately, as his hands gripped my hips and pulled them against his hard arousal.
Damn him.
I moaned against his mouth, his hands freely exploring my body and up to my breasts where they settled.
“Breakfast is never going to get made this way,” I teased, pushing him away slightly. “I need to shower. And get ready for work.” And pack. But I wasn’t going to tell him that just yet. It was in case of an emergency—AKA, William kicked me out before I could grab what I needed.
He leaned back on his heels as his head fell back, groaning. “Fine…you clean up, I’ll make breakfast.”
“See? I have you trained already.” I winked, kissing him once more before sliding out of his arms and grabbing my hot cup of coffee. I took it with me as I began walking out of the kitchen.
“I wouldn’t go that far,” he warned. I looked over my shoulder and smirked at him.
I GRABBED MY
Louis Vuitton suitcase out of the closet and began packing the essentials. I planned to hide it so William wouldn’t become suspicious until we could talk. I still wasn’t sure how I was going to tell him, or when, but I knew I had to as soon as possible. I wasn’t looking forward to it, but I was positive it was what I wanted.
Thinking back to just forty-eight hours ago, I couldn’t believe how much had changed. I hadn’t even had time to call Staci and fill her in, but I’d call her on one of my breaks and give her the quick rundown.
Once I finished packing, I hopped in the shower and got dressed. Nerves were already creeping in, making me feel anxious about how this day was going to go. I knew work would distract me at least, but it’d still be in the back of my mind.
I could smell bacon sizzling and decided I’d eat before finishing my hair and makeup. As I walked down the hallway to the kitchen, I heard Alex speaking. I stilled, listening as he spoke to someone on the phone.
I looked down at my phone and saw that it was only six forty-five. Who the hell could he be on the phone with this early?
I heard deep laughter and the sound of pancakes flipping. I tiptoed closer to the door but didn’t go through.
“Yeah, man…no worries,” he began and then paused before speaking up again, “Nah, actually I should be thanking
you
.” He laughed again, listening to the person on the other line before responding, “You would never guess who was there that night…no, man. You’ll never guess who I saw.”
Was he talking about
me
?
“Dude…my dad’s fiancée. She was there with some girlfriends and once I saw her…” I could hear deep, amused laughs coming from him, but my feet remained planted on the floor. My jaw dropped, my body heating up in anger as the realization came flooding through.
He knew.
“I fucked her all night long…” he continued, and I almost threw up in my mouth at the cold way he said it. “So good, man. Yeah, I’m living here.” More laughter. “What do you think? Of course.”
My body started shaking at the way he spoke about us—about me—as if I was just some pawn in his little scheme to get back at William.
“Yeah, she’s a fox…much hotter in person.”
I gasped, but quickly covered my mouth. I heard him shuffle around the kitchen as he ended the phone call and before I could stop myself, I moved through the kitchen entryway. His eyes locked on mine, shock and fear evident in his face.
“Mac…” he started, but I quickly cut him off.
“You knew.” I stood frozen, my jaw tight and fists clenched at my sides.
Silence.
“You knew who I was…” I continued as he stepped closer, my mind spinning.
“You weren’t supposed to hear that.” He brought his hand out to me, but I stepped back.
“Fuck you.” My blood was boiling. I didn’t want him to touch me. I didn’t want him anywhere near me.
“Mac…” he said again, but it had no effect on me.
“YOU KNEW!” I screamed back, pushing against his chest once he was close enough. “You did this on purpose. Some sick twisted get back at daddy revenge? You threw me around like a rag doll, making me second-guess everything I was happy with.”
“Mac…it wasn’t like that.” His voice was low, deep, and controlled.
“Shut up, Alex. I don’t want to hear it.” I turned and started to walk out.
“Don’t tell me to shut up. I’m not done with you, Mac.” He grabbed my elbow, pulling me toward him.
I yanked my elbow out of his grip and looked him in the eyes, cold and defeated. “Well, I’m done with you.”