Dangerously Hers (11 page)

“No, no.” Jess held Yazmine’s hand. “I want to tell you. I haven’t spoken about this to anyone before.”

Yazmine nodded.

“I’m only free because I gave up on life.”

“I don’t understand.”

Jess took a deep breath and exhaled, trying to calm herself. “I escaped from my room because I…” She paused, too ashamed to say what happened out loud. “I was looking for a way to kill myself.”

“Oh Jess.”

“Everyone thinks I did something heroic.” She shook her head. “I didn’t. We weren’t allowed any items that could be used to do ourselves harm. I was so tired of living and doing…those things that I snuck out and stole some clothes. I wanted to find a weapon so I could end it all.” She let out a nervous laugh. “The guards stopped me and asked me for payment. They thought I was a patron.” Her laughter came easier this time. “When I didn’t have anything to give them, they forced me to leave. There was an unattended vessel and I snuck on it. By the time I finally found a blaster, the crew boarded and the vessel took off.” She shrugged. “So you see? It was by accident.”

She hiccupped and Yazmine ran her hand across Jess’ hair. “But you made it away safely.”

“I stayed in that cabin for days. Just me and that blaster.” She looked down at her hands, remembering. “I willed myself to use it. I had escaped one prison for another. I didn’t want to live another day being forced to have sex. Sometimes I would stare at it for hours, wondering if death would claim me quick.”

“What happened? What changed your mind?”

Jess shrugged. “Sometimes I wonder if my mind is changed.” She looked at Yazmine. “Some days I get out of bed filled with spit and hellfire and others I want to curl into a ball and die.” She squeezed Yazmine’s hand. “But I’m here. I choose to live. I choose to not let those brothel bastards win.” Jess let out a heavy breath. “Sometimes I think of going back there and killing them all. And knowing my temper, I just might one day.”

“Eva killed Umar. I’m glad he’s dead but a part of me wishes he was still alive so I could do it myself. I feel like it would help with closure,” Yazmine said.

Jess gathered Yazmine into a hug. “There may be days when you feel like ending it all but you must realize there is a reason you’re alive and he’s dead.”

Yazmine nodded.

“You know who helped me through it all?”

“Kane?” Yazmine asked.

“Yes, but mainly JB. He was always there when I needed someone to talk to or if I just needed a shoulder to cry on.”

Yazmine slumped. “He has tried to get in touch with me. I didn’t want to contact him. I can’t continue the relationship that we had on the vessel.”

Jess rubbed her back. “Hon, that’s not why he’s contacting you. He wants to see how you are doing.”

Yazmine wiped her tears from her face.

“Go see him. I’m sure you won’t regret it.”

“Thank you for sharing with me.”

“Anytime.” Jess rose and helped Yazmine to her feet.

“When I am ready to talk about what happened to me, can I come back?”

Fresh tears overtook her eyes. She pulled Yazmine into an embrace. “You can come back any time you want.”

* * * * *

“Marcie is under the impression you want me.” Rasha watched Jess in order to gauge her reaction.

Jess removed her eating utensil from her mouth and let it drop with a clang on her dinner plate. Immediately her hand flew up to her lips. “I think I threw up a little in my mouth.”

He studied her food. “Is the food unsatisfactory?” The only reason he had suggested the
buro
flank was because Eva swore it reminded her of chicken, whatever that was.

Jess swallowed and slowly turned to face him. “Marcie has nothing to worry about.”

He settled back into his seat. “I think she does.” Her eyes narrowed at him. “I am attracted to you.”

“You can’t be serious,” she muttered. Jess focused her attention back on her food.

“I am.”

He’d thought long and hard about revealing his feelings to her. Eva told him not to expect Jess to be receptive but Eva was wrong. Jess was more than receptive. He’d caught her eyes roaming the length of his body more than once. And by the glint in them, she appreciated his body just as much as he appreciated hers.

“I told you before. I’m here to work for you. If we can’t keep this professional, I’ll have to quit. I don’t need a complication.”

“I’ll let you think on it for a little while then.”

Jess snorted. “That’s something I don’t have to think about.” She pushed her plate away and scooted back from the table.

“Where are you going? You’ll miss the entertainment.”

“Will it be something different than those reptile thingies who writhe and contort in the middle of the room?”
Hisnapol
dancers were legendary for their grace but by the way Jess’ face twisted into a scowl when she described them, he guessed she didn’t appreciate them as much as he did.

“No, they are scheduled to perform for the remainder of the lunar cycle.”

“Then I’ll pass.” Jess stood and said her good nights to everyone at the table. “They give me the heebie-jeebies.”

He stood to leave with her. “I’ll walk you home.”

As he approached her, she did a double take. “I can find my way. Plus I wouldn’t want to give Marcie any reason to think I’m moving in on her territory.” Jess glanced to the other side of the room.

He didn’t need to look to know she was watching Marcie. He was sure Marcie watched them as well. “I’m not hers. We are not bonded.”

Now that he’d met Jess, he could never see himself with anyone else. He’d tried to open up to the idea of committing to Marcie and having children but something was always lacking. After experiencing how his heart reacted to Jess, he knew what was missing and he wanted it.

“It doesn’t matter. She’s got her claws hooked deep into you, in your back to be more specific.”

Why did she have to bring that up?
“That was before.”

“Before what? I came along and made you forget about the other females?” she said, batting her eyelashes.

He nodded. “They are nothing but a distant memory.”

“They?”

“Jess, I’ve had my share of females.”

She didn’t slow her steps as she held up a hand. “That’s not the kind of thing you say to a woman you’re interested in.”

He shrugged. “I’m just stating a fact.”

Jess activated the door security and entered. “I was the only female in an all-male crew.”

He stumbled as he crossed over the threshold.

“Just stating a fact,” she added.

She was right. He shouldn’t have brought up other females. He definitely didn’t want to hear about her with other males.

Jess went down her hall without a backward glance.

“Do you think you could have feelings for me?” he asked, following her.

“It’s not that easy.” Jess stopped. “Even if I did, I wouldn’t act on them.”

“We are not that much different from each other.”

She exhaled. “Stick with Marcie, Rasha.”

He moved closer. “I choose you.”

She shook her head adamantly and placed a hand on his chest, stopping him. “I came from a brothel.”

“I am aware.”

“You don’t get it.” She hugged herself. “I’m not mate material. I’ll never be mate material.”

“Why not?”

“
Things
touched me there. They used my body.”

He wanted to wrap his arms around her. Jess needed him—a protector. He could be that for her. “Like many other human females, you were forced into the brothels. This was not your choice.”

Jess turned her head as if too ashamed to look at him any longer. “You don’t understand.”

Unable to stop himself, he reached out to her and held on to her arms. Her flesh trembled under his touch. “Tell me, make me understand.”

She didn’t push him away or flinch out of his grasp. He took a chance and gathered her into his arms, where she melted into him.

“They made me like it,” she said, disgusted.

He gently caressed her back. “Made you?”

“They would fill my room with, with…I don’t know. But it was sweet smelling. My stomach would churn every time the smell began to seep through the vents. I knew what was about to happen and couldn’t do anything to stop it. I would run to the door and bang on it, trying to force it to open. I would even hold my breath for as long as I could. By the time those things came for me, I was waiting for them. I would beg them to bed me, sometimes in tears because I wanted it so bad.” She sniffled and her breath hitched.

Great Ancients. If he ever got a chance he would split her former owners from groin to brain with his
jango
. Not only for what they had done to Jess but for what they were probably still doing to countless others.

“It’s called Xy. You could not have resisted if you had tried.”

She cried softly. Her tears wet his chest. “I’m disgusting. I did awful things and I enjoyed it.”

“That’s how Xy works. It’s made to make you want sex and to enjoy it.” He pulled her away from him. Her eyes were rimmed in red with tears spilling over and down her cheeks. “It’s not your fault, Jess.”

Her body trembled and her knees began to buckle. “I’m nothing more than a barren whore who’s trying to start again. I’m not good enough for you.”

His mouth crushed over hers.

Chapter Eleven

She didn’t resist. She couldn’t resist.

Jess didn’t know how she ended up with her back against the wall or when he had removed her clothes…or his. She couldn’t think of anything as his hard body pressed flush against hers, every muscled inch.

Her heart thumped erratically in a heavy beat that threatened to explode from her chest as he laid his golden forearms flat on the wall on either side of her head.

As if in slow motion, his lips descended on hers. The first time had been a surprise. This time she waited for it. Strong hands cradled the back of her head, angling it up and forward. Catching a breath, she held it, too afraid to move as he gently kissed her.

She parted her lips and welcomed him.

His tongue invaded her mouth. Instinctively hers met his. Circling each other, their tongues danced and explored.

Her chest burned and ached from the breaths she strained to take. Her mind was nothing more than a jumbled mess. She couldn’t grasp on to a thought. She couldn’t focus.

A deep moan reverberated from him as his fingers ran through her hair. Unable to resist touching him, she wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him closer, forcing their lips to crush against each other.

On a sinful grunt he grabbed her ass and lifted her off the floor. Without thinking of the consequences, she crossed her legs behind his back, clasping tightly to him. The hard bulge of his cock pressed where she needed it most. A groan escaped her lips as she ground against him with aching need.

He was huge. A hint of concern about his length and thickness crossed through her mind.

Breaking from him, she took two painful breaths. “Rasha, I don’t know…” Her sentence trailed off as he laid light kisses to her ear and down her neck. Her chest burned as if there wasn’t enough air.

“You can stop me any time,” Rasha whispered. His voice was deep and raspy, filled with unspoken need.

She could stop him at any time. But would she?

With soft kisses, he made his way down to her breast. He stopped there and hesitated.
Damn.
Biting on her lower lip, she held back a plea. She wanted him but she wouldn’t be the first to admit it.

Ignoring the pain in her lip, she watched as he placed more teasing kisses around her nipple.

“Your body should be worshiped, not abused.”

She shuddered at his words.

Her eyes closed when strong hands massaged her ass, grinding her mound on his thickened cock. With her fingers entwined in his hair, she led his mouth over the darkened bud standing erect for him.

“Let me take care of you.”

Take care of me.

Instant gratification was her only thought as he swiped a tongue over her sensitive flesh. Hissing, she pulled him closer. His sinful tongue licked again.

“Mmm,” he moaned as he pulled an erect nipple between his lips.

She let her head fall to the top of his. Tingles ran down her spine as he tugged and licked each nipple, alternating from one to the other. Kissing the top of his head, she encouraged him.

“That feels so good,” she murmured.

When was the last time someone touched her like this? After Kane, she’d had a fling with Kyle. But nothing either man did to her felt as good as this.

“Do you want me to stop?” he asked after releasing a nipple.

She rested her cheek on his head. “No.”

She moaned, grinding on his hot shaft. Her pussy pulsated, seeping with need. His fingers bit into her ass as he lifted her, positioning his cock over her opening.

“Rasha, now, please.” She couldn’t take it anymore, especially when she felt the heat from his head straining against her.

She held on to him tightly as his cock slowly breached her. His size was more than she could accommodate, stretching her.

A small whimper escaped her lips.

“We can stop if this hurts.” His voice came out as a strained whisper.

Stop?
Never.

Inhaling deeply, she relaxed her muscles and lowered her body.

“Argh!” he yelled. The muscles in his arms flexed as he held her tighter.

“No stopping,” she said as her walls throbbed around him, stretching to capacity.

He pulled back slowly and lingered around her pussy before pressing forward again, deeper.

She threw her head back and yelled out in pleasure. “Ahh.”

The sounds of his cock working in her slick juices danced off the walls. Her pussy grabbed tightly around his shaft, milking every swollen inch.

With her impaled on his cock, he walked her to the bed, where he laid her down.

He pulled out. His gaze roamed the length of her body.

She displayed herself proudly for him. She massaged her breasts but her attention was on his rock-hard cock. It was exactly as he’d boasted. Big. And it had been in her. Her glistening juices spread across his head was proof.