Daring Confessions (Bend To My Will #10) (8 page)

Already, the man considered Jacob his nemesis. Unprovoked, he’d come after Jacob, and threatened to continue in that vein. It was uncertain what impact this new twist would have on Kenyon, or how he might seek retaliation. But Jacob didn’t care. He hadn’t been afraid of the man before, and he certainly wasn’t now. Whatever insane plan of attack he came up with, Jacob would continue to knock him down, and eventually take him out of the game for good.

Chapter 9

When Jacob went to San Francisco, he took Vivienne with him on the trip. The city in Northern California was on the tip of a peninsula surrounded by the Pacific Ocean and San Francisco Bay. Vivienne had seen pictures of its hilly landscape and year-round fog, but hadn’t been there before.

She couldn’t wait to tour the city to watch the cable cars traversing up steep hills, and to see the colorful Victorian houses up close. The afternoon they flew in, Vivienne saw the Golden Gate Bridge spanning the blue water, and the city sprawled at the base of the hills, with fog hanging low.

Jacob had reserved a specialty one-bedroom suite at the Four Seasons Hotel, which was larger than Vivienne’s apartment. It had views of Yerba Buena Gardens and the San Francisco Bay. The super-fancy details included custom hand-made woven rugs and pure silk wall coverings. There was also a wine refrigerator with over thirty bottles of wine, hand-selected by the hotel’s sommelier.

The first day they visited Golden Gate Park, rode in a cable car up a sharp incline, and made it to Lombard Street. It was a crooked street that zigzagged up a very steep hill, the street constructed in a series of switchbacks. The view of the city from the top was worth the trip up. Apartments and houses lined the street, looking like colorful building blocks about to come tumbling down.

Later in the afternoon, they went to Fisherman’s Wharf, a very popular tourist area. There were lots of old ships, and a plethora of vendors selling fresh-off-the-boat seafood. Vivienne and Jacob walked up and down the boardwalk, breathing in the smell of sea air.

They stopped at one of the sidewalk eateries for a sourdough bowl filled with fresh clam chowder. And they went to Ghiradelli Square to buy chocolate. One of the coolest parts was all the street performers, who were very talented, and whom Vivienne found inspiring.

The temperature was in the fifties, and with the wind from the bay, it felt very chilly. Vivienne was glad she’d worn a down jacket and gloves, or she would have been freezing. By the afternoon, there was heavy cloud cover, and without the sun it was even colder.

The next day Jacob had meetings until late in the afternoon. He’d shared the details of his new venture with Vivienne, and she was excited for him. He was meeting with some key players, retailers who might buy a high volume of wine online from Rinaldi Imports.

While Jacob was gone, Vivienne made use of the amenities at the luxury hotel. After sleeping in, she went downstairs to have a late breakfast in the restaurant. It was very chic, with brass detailing, dark oak floors, with hunter green and black leather accents throughout.

Vivienne ordered a cappuccino and lemon ricotta pancakes, which were delicious. When she finished her meal, she went to the spa for some pampering. She had a facial and a massage, but even after all that luxuriating, there was still plenty of time before Jacob would return.

The shopping at Union Square was only two blocks away, so Vivienne bundled up against the cold and walked over. The indoor mall included Nordstrom and Bloomingdale’s, as well as six levels with hundreds of shops.

It was easy to find items to purchase, and after hours of being lost in the fashion wonderland, Vivienne was loaded with bags. It would soon be time for Jacob to get back to the hotel, so she buttoned her coat for the two-block walk back.

Just as she entered the lobby, Jacob texted her:
Just got back
.

I’m here. On my way up.

Jacob in a chair by the fireplace scrolling on his phone was a welcome sight. Vivienne dumped her packages on the sofa and went to sit on his lap. With her arms around his neck, she said, “I missed you.”

Jacob smiled, and with a glance at the pile of bags on the sofa, he said, “It looks like you found a way to occupy your time.”

Vivienne laughed. “I found some great stuff.” She kissed him, and he dug his hand in her hair to prolong the kiss. “But I’m starving. Let me change so we can go eat.”

Vivienne carried the bags to the bedroom and dug out a knit dress that would be a good choice for dinner. She put on black stockings and leather heels, then went back out to find Jacob still on his phone. “It’s going to be a busy trip,” he said.

They went to the dining room on one of the top levels of the hotel. It had floor-to-ceiling windows with impressive views of downtown and the Financial District. After dark, the city’s lights sparkled on the tall buildings, and it all seemed very glamorous.

Vivienne helped Jacob polish off a bottle of wine with dinner, and the alcohol had its effect. She had a nice buzz going by the time they got back to the suite. They didn’t even make it to the bedroom, but began undressing as soon as they were alone.

Jacob stripped down to his briefs, taking Vivienne’s breath away. She had worn black stockings with a garter belt, and left those on when she peeled off her dress. Jacob’s lascivious look inspired her. Sitting on the sofa beside him, naked except for the sensual stockings, Vivienne rubbed her foot over the bulge in Jacob’s briefs.

His eyes filled with lust and he rubbed her foot, while she rubbed him. Jacob turned with his back against the arm of the sofa, so he was at a better angle. Vivienne slid his briefs down to free his gorgeous cock, then took the liberty of fisting and licking him.

“You taste so good.” The black stockings gave Vivienne an idea, and she leaned against the opposite end of the sofa with her feet on Jacob’s cock. His thighs were apart, making him entirely accessible.

Vivienne massaged his cock with her feet, the silk stockings caressing his velvety skin. It was very erotic and turned her on, especially when Jacob’s eyes glistened with arousal. He looked so sexy and virile leaning back on the sofa with both of her feet rubbing him.

Jacob’s breathing grew heavy and ragged, as did Vivienne’s. She held his cock between her feet, then hooked her toes over the wide crest. His nipples were hard, and the sculpted muscles of his body were rock hard.

Then Vivienne increased the pressure of her feet, while stroking faster, making Jacob groan. Cum spurted out onto his chest, while she pressed her feet to his pulsing cock. Seeing Jacob climax spiraled Vivienne’s arousal higher, and he was instantly aware of her need.

Jacob stood up and lifted her into his arms. He carried Vivienne to the massive bed, where they made love until the early morning hours. The orgasm he gave her with his hot mouth was only the first, and through the night they pleasured each other until they finally fell asleep in delicious exhaustion.

*****

The next day Jacob’s schedule was lighter, so they slept late and then ordered room service. Over eggs, bacon, toast, and coffee, Vivienne settled into a comfortable position in the thickly padded dining chair, with her legs folded underneath her.

It was all so cozy and relaxing and romantic. Vivienne looked at Jacob, with his short, silky hair, messy from sex and sleep. She loved him so much, and she couldn’t see why he wouldn’t give in to the emotion.

Was loving so difficult? Yet Jacob couldn’t let go of the past, and try as she might, Vivienne didn’t understand…not completely. Intimate moments like this made her wish that he would tell her how he felt, that she wouldn’t have to keep guessing…keep hoping.

“Why, Jacob?”

Jacob looked up and put his coffee cup on the table. “Why what?”

“Why can’t you say you love me?”

His agonized expression prompted Vivienne to think there was so much more that he hadn’t told her. Whatever it was, it was powerful enough to harden his heart against falling in love. And she had to know what was that potent.

“What haven’t you told me?”

Jacob pushed his chair back, and stood to pace the carpet. “Vivienne, you need to understand.”

“I’m trying to, Jacob. I really am…but you’re going to have to help me.”

Jacob shook his head. “I don’t know, baby. The past has a grip on me. I can’t escape it; can’t move on. I’m not able to let go.”

“But why?”

Jacob stared out the window so long that Vivienne thought he wasn’t going to say anything more. Then he came back to the table and sat down. He looked into her eyes, then proceeded to make confessions, each one more alarming than the last.

“You know how much I hate Carl Hahn, but…it’s more than that.”

“Tell me.”

“When I was around him every day, witnessing the abuse, experiencing it…I wanted Carl to die. I wished for his death, and used to fantasize about ways it might happen.”

Vivienne listened closely, already understanding that he was sharing something that possibly he hadn’t shared with
anyone
until now.

“This isn’t the sort of thing one talks about. What sort of boy becomes obsessed with the death of his father? Yet I
did
.” Jacob looked tortured by the admission.

“I don’t know where my father is now. He disappeared. I haven’t seen him since I was a child. Because of the way he drank, I’d be surprised if he’s still around. But it’s hard to know.”

“All of that happened a long time ago,” Vivienne said.

Jacob stared at her as if he hadn’t heard what she said. “There’s something I haven’t told you before.” He looked up at the ceiling, as if gathering courage. “I tried to block it out. It was too horrible to think about, and I shoved it into the dark recesses of my mind.”

“You have to talk about it, Jacob. If you don’t, it will eventually destroy you.”

“I did more than
wish
that Carl was dead,” Jacob said. “I tried to kill him.”

Vivienne was stunned; she had trouble imagining Jacob trying to kill his father.

“That fatal day when my mother was taken away by ambulance, I was distraught. My grief was usurped by blind rage. I hated Carl, hated what he’d done, so I ran to the kitchen and got a knife. I knew it was sharp, as I’d used it to do the chopping for my mother. It was one of the weapons I’d envisioned using against Carl.”

Jacob raked his hands through his hair. “I grabbed the knife, and with tears of rage streaming down my cheeks, I ran back to the living room. Carl had his back to me, looking out the door, as the medics put the stretcher into the ambulance.”

Without missing a beat, Jacob continued, “I knew how to kill with a knife, where to stab to hit the heart. I’d studied it in books at the school library, about anatomy and medical stuff. I figured it out.

“And I was strong for my age. I ran a lot and did lifting or heavy yard work to build up my arms. I think subconsciously I had been preparing for a physical confrontation, hoping I could best my father, that I wouldn’t always be a weak child.”

Vivienne held her breath.

“I waited until Carl turned to face me, wondering where I’d gone. Then I ran toward him with as much power as I could muster. He didn’t react, just stood there with a shocked expression. He was too drunk to move out of my way.”

“Oh my God, what happened?”

“I lifted the heavy knife over my head, and was just about to plunge it into his heart. I hadn’t noticed one of the paramedics coming back up the walk to see if I was okay. It all seemed to happen in slow motion.”

Jacob clenched his fists. “The medic rapidly took in the scene, and fell against Carl to knock him out of the way. I lunged, but when they moved out of my path, I fell to the ground and the knife clattered out onto the porch.”

Vivienne’s gaze locked with Jacob’s; then came another confession.

“I was taken into custody for the attempted murder of my father,” Jacob said. “I was only eight, so I was detained by social services, and my case was to be reviewed in juvenile court. It’s all sort of a blur, like a horrible nightmare.”

“That’s terrible.”

“I was a minor, but Vico stepped in. He retained an attorney to deal with the court, because he didn’t want me to end up in some state-run reform school.” Jacob sighed. “Carl was too out of it to press charges, so eventually I was released, and Vico began the adoption process.”

Vivienne was touched by Jacob’s daring confessions.

“I’m not the man you think I am,” Jacob said, his voice low, his expression hopeless.

Vivienne wanted to go to Jacob, to tell him that he was being too harsh in his judgment of his actions. He had only been a child at the time, and a victim at that. Surely, being brutally abused by his father would have been a defense against any charges.

But the cold look in Jacob’s eyes held her back.

“Vivienne…I tried to
kill
my own father.”

“But Jacob…you
didn’t succeed
.”

“A mere fraction of a second altered the course of events. That medic returning to the house changed my future. If not for him shoving Carl out of the way…I
would have
killed him.”

Vivienne looked into Jacob’s eyes, finding no mercy, no tolerance for what he considered an inexcusable offense. He believed that he was evil, that he had the temperament required to kill a man. Jacob thought he was bad, and now Vivienne understood why. Yet she had no clue what to do about it, or what future they could possibly have together.

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