Dark World: The Surface Girl (18 page)

              The flatfoots, who wouldn't have allowed me to speak to them that way in the real world, ignored my insolence and slammed the door behind them. The very next instant, my body was set free from whatever bizarre force had kept me from coordination. I rushed to the door and tore it open but they were gone without a sight or sound. No Grandpa Logan. No flatfoots. I fell to my knees as utter defeat and infuriation washed over me like a blanket of suffocation. Hate boiled up inside of me like a tornado, twisting and turning as it started in my gut, then reached my heart with its icicles and finally entered my mind, making me wish horrible, torturous things on the devious monsters that comprised of our government and everyone involved with them.
             
Wake up
             
Something echoed in my mind.
             
Ruby, wake up.
             
“Ruby, wake up.” The echo was clearer now and I recognized the voice. The red hot room around me turned to fuzz and began to dissolve. “Ruby?”
              I groaned as my consciousness slowly and regrettably seeped back into the waking world. The dream around me completely faded and all I saw was black. Begrudgingly, I opened my eyes and shifted, grateful that I could still feel the warmth of Reese by my side. When I glanced at him he curled the corners of his lips upward and smiled at me softly before his doe-brown eyes shifted. I followed his gaze and watched the little girl. She was curled up in the fetal position, clutching her stick-like legs and twitching in her sleep. I wanted to wake her from whatever frightening nightmare she must be having but the tiny hairs that stood up on the back of my neck alerted me to the presence of others.
              I snapped my eyes upward and swept my gaze from side to side. Four members of the Order had surrounded us. I pushed my hand against the ground and sat up, shaking my head a bit to toss away the grogginess that was trying to tempt me into more sleep. The hand lamps on the ground illuminated the four faces in an orangey glow. Their serious and tense expressions silently let me know that going back to sleep at the moment probably wasn't an option. I decided against saving the little girl from her probable nightmare because for that poor frightened confused child, reality was probably even more terrifying than anything her dreams could conjure up.
              “We've made a decision,” Evon stated begrudgingly. He stepped forward. “Ruby, the flatfoot that is assigned to guard your barracks was informed yesterday evening while the coded papers were dropped off that someone would be returning to pick them up at 8AM. That's only a few hours from now.” My eyes widened. How could that have only been last night? My father receiving those papers felt like a lifetime ago. “We’ll be sending Fawke to pick them up; he's the same man that originally dropped them off. He’ll enquire with the guard when the GP is scheduled to return to your barracks. Your parents will at least be safe up until that point. We will then intercept the GP before his scheduled visit.” Evon paused and glanced behind him at the others before fixating his gaze back on me. “Ruby, you need to understand something before we go any further. There's no safe way to go about any of this. Beyond that, there's no way to cover this up. Even if we succeed in warning your parents in time and even if we manage to coordinate getting them to a rendezvous point, our very best case scenario will be that, as far as The Complex will know, you and your parents simply disappeared, and obviously, there's no such thing as people in The Complex simply disappearing.” My throat tightened and my eyes shifted helplessly toward Reese. Evon was getting at something and that something had formed into a metal ball that was pressing down on my stomach making it churn in painful protest. “This rescue operation, even if successful, will end the facade of all of us living an ignorant and obedient life under the rule of Doctrine. The government will know with certainty that somewhere in The Complex, traitors who know more than they want us to know are hiding in wait to expose the truth.”
             
Traitors?
Is that what the Order was? Is that what
I
was? Why did that word bring with it such a strong sense of deja-vous that didn't seem to easily connect back to a classroom lesson?
             
War. Grandpa Logan?
             
Bits and pieces of my dream flashed in short bursts just behind my eyes. I recalled talking with Grandpa. He told me that we were at war. I remember that I hadn't understood what he was talking about, but now I did. The word 'traitors' had been the trigger I needed.
              All of this wasn't happening because of the girl, this was happening because of
me
. The Order could have made sure the little girl was never discovered by the government. They could have bided their time and found the truth when they were ready, without putting others in unnecessary danger. Evon was telling me, right here and right now, that I was the catalyst to a war. War meant countless lives lost, far more than just my parents.
              I couldn't be a hero even if I wanted to. I could tell the Order to call off the rescue mission but I knew it wouldn't solve the problem. I created inevitable war the moment I crawled into the air vent and escaped while under confinement. I alone, and my naïve, ill-thought desperation to be with Reese again was about to change and endanger the lives of every single human being in The Complex.
              Bile quickly boiled up inside of my stomach like a liquid hurricane. Acid and bits of undigested crackers raced up my esophagus, scalding it with a hot burn before pooling out of my mouth like a projectile river. I heard people around me jump backward before the chunky mixture splattered down onto the floor and began to cascade outward. The last of the vile concoction dribbled down my chin and I was so horrified by my emotions that I barely felt Reese gently wiping it off. “But - what if GP Nolan doesn't want to help us? What if he tells the flatfoots?” I managed to choke out as my lurching stomach, unconvinced of its new emptiness, still tried to expel contents that no longer existed.
              “We have something he wants; something he
needs
. We're prepared to offer it to him in exchange for his cooperation.
              “We will instruct him to inform the guards that he has identified your father's nasopharyngitis strain as a new mutation of a recently and previously identified virus in a nearby division. He will then request to re-examine your family without the government’s direct presence, for their own safety.” I doubted the guards would persist. When it came to viruses and the fear of catching them, people always listened to a GP's instructions. Well, almost always. I was the idiotic exception. “He will assure your parents that you are with the Order and you are safe. He'll instruct them to leave their barracks at the precise time they would normally leave for work. Instead, though, they will come directly here.
              “He'll report to the flatfoot that your parents are cleared for work, but he'd like you to stay home one more day because you showed a possible symptom of potentially coming down with the virus. They won't expect to see you emerge from your barracks.”
              I bit my lower lip. This was
not
an iron-clad plan. What if my parents were still monitored even after GP Nolan cleared them? What if the flatfoot demanded to see me? This plan had only a small chance at success, not a guarantee. There were too many ifs, ands and buts. Even I could see that.
              “But my mom, she doesn't know about any of this. The Order...”
              “It will be your father's responsibility to enlist her immediate cooperation. Her life will depend on it.”
              “What if the GP can't be bribed? What if he tells the flatfoot, instead? What if the guards won't let him examine my parents alone? What if the guards try to follow them when they supposedly leave for work?” He sighed.
              “Ruby, let me remind you again that this is risky and there are no guarantees. This plan is far from perfect, but it’s the best plan of action we have.” Evon confirmed my fears and it was the opposite of comforting. I wanted more answers. I wanted the Order to be prepared for the what-if's. I wanted them to have a solid, branched out plan of action for all of the variables that could go wrong. I wanted them to fix the mistakes I made, mistakes that had put my parents in immediate danger in the first place.
              “What about Reese's parents... how will you warn them? And Sukie's family?”
              Evon sighed. “For Gaia and Thao, there's only one of two possibilities. They are either not under suspicion of anything yet, or they have already been put to sleep. And I'll be frank with you, with Reese's crimes against Doctrine..” Evon did not need to finish that sentence. Reese's hand tightened over my own. My stomach lurched again but although my shoulders were thrown forward, I dry-heaved and nothing more spilled out of me. I slumped against Reese's side, weak and defeated. “After we deal with the GP, we’ll pay their barracks a discreet visit and find out. We’ll do our best to warn them and bring them here, but,” Evon paused. I narrowed my eyes.
              “But what?” Reese joined in the conversation with an impatient, frightened tone as he sat up a bit straighter.
              “If they’ve already been taken, there won't be anything we can do.” I couldn't look at Reese right now. I couldn't allow my eyes to shift in his direction because I didn't deserve to see his face. This was all my fault. If his family had been put to sleep, their lives would weigh on my shoulders. How would Reese ever look at me again? I had just found love, literally hours ago – and now it would be spoiled forever and always out of my reach. Reese's resentment of me would grow deeper and deeper every passing day until he couldn't even stand to be around me or acknowledge my existence.
              Lives could be lost and I was sitting here mourning the fact that I could lose my one chance at love. I was a truly terrible, selfish person. I deserved every bit of resentment coming my way. I deserved to be punished for the lives that were going to be lost because of the things I had done.
              “Do you have any more questions?” Evon asked me with a bit of sarcasm in his tone. I dug my fingernails into my knee.
              “Just one. What are you offering GP Nolan that will convince him to go against Doctrine?” Evon paused before responding.
              “An answer to a question that has plagued him for many years.” When he didn't continue right away, I pressed my lips together with impatience. No one just casually asked another to go against Doctrine and deceive a flatfoot. We all knew what that kind of blatant insolence resulted in; being put to sleep. Convincing someone to risk their lives would take more than a simple bribe.
              “What question?” Evon licked his lips.
              “He’s been wondering what happened to someone he was once close to. Someone that was carrying his child. Someone that wasn't his wife.”
              My blood ran cold. It was as if it literally froze in my veins and simply refused to circulate further. A shudder ran all the way down my spine and pooled into a deep pit of dread at the base of it.
What was he saying?
              “He fathered someone's child?
He had a secret lover...?
” The last five words passed through my lips as a whisper of realization. Despite my own very recent acceptance of falling in love against Doctrine, I had never really stopped to think about how many other people in The Complex might also have secret lovers. I couldn't possibly be the only person who fell in love with someone they weren't mated with. “What if the government already saw Reese and I sneaking into the passageway yesterday?” Evon stared at me with a furrowed brow, then a relaxed brow as if he couldn't decide whether to be disgusted by me or empathetic toward me.
              “Then, it will be too late.” I shouldn't have asked. I shouldn't have considered that. But, I had to, didn't I? I couldn't just expect everything to turn out okay, because it wasn't going to. Even if a miracle happened for Reese and I and all four of our parents were alive and brought to safety, we could never go back. My mom's world was about to crash down on her just like my own had, but at least I had chosen this for myself because my old life wasn't what I wanted. My mom was about to be forced into this fear and uncertainty against her will.
              I rested my head back down on Reese's shoulder. I knew it was temporary. I knew that if things didn't go well with the Order's plan, there would be no more love between us and these two tiny days where my heart finally felt free to connect with his would be the only glimpse I ever had of happiness.
              How ironic that I even considered the word 'happiness' in the midst of all of this fear and turmoil to be a part of my life. Everything had changed when Reese sneaked me into the passageway. Some of those changes were obvious; finding the little girl, realizing the government was keeping things from us, discovering my dad was a part of this Order and then putting my entire family's life at risk because I wanted to save Reese – but some changes were internal, too. I had resented the government from a very early age, and then even more-so when I had watched them drag my grandfather away but to have those hidden questions in the back of my mind confirmed – to know with certainty that our meaningless lives shut away in The Complex didn't have to be this way, it was like putting a stick of dynamite right on the balancing-middle of a teeter-totter. Both ends would be blasted to bits, the fire-cracker side of me that was filled with resolve and fury, and the tired, overwhelmed, regretful side of me that wished I could have been a different person from the day I was born. If I had never questioned Doctrine and The Complex, I might have lived out my lie of a life without knowing it was a lie like most others seemed to. Maybe living a lie was better than getting everyone you loved killed.