Denying Ecstasy (The Guardians of the Realms Series) (20 page)

She sat up on the bed and started rummaging through the bag. She kept the blanket at her breasts. “There are clothes.” She sounded relieved.

He’d rather she stayed naked, but they still had to talk. He sure as hell wasn’t looking forward to it, but he’d said they would.

“Sirena said Alyssa packed you a bag when I took you.”

He saw her lips tilt into a small smile. He knew it wasn’t for him, more likely for her friend’s thoughtfulness. He stared at the small dimple that appeared on her cheek. He wanted to trace it with his tongue. Shit.

“I’ll be on the patio,” he said, turning to leave. He needed to get somewhere her scent didn’t linger. The pain wasn’t nearly as bad as before, but he wanted her. Worse after smelling her juices flow after porting her there. Her small body was readying for his possession, and he was dying to be back inside her tight little pussy. He ran his hands through his hair and walked into the kitchen. He hoped she used the cream.

He went straight to the fridge, which was always stocked with beer. He’d need to get some food for her. Immortals fed off the world’s energies, but she wasn’t Immortal, yet.
Conn, can you have someone drop food off at the beach house? I’m not sure what Rain likes to eat, so variety would be good.

No problem. I’ll drop it off inside the back door in a few.

Thanks, man.

He pulled out a bottle and twisted off the cap. He stood inside the fridge door, feeling the cool air over his heated skin, and took a few long pulls. He grabbed another and considered what she might want to drink. A smile tilted his lips as he remembered her comparing the taste of his kiss to her favorite sweet wine. He bumped his head into the freezer door, to clear his mind of more heated thoughts. Wine it was. He knew the one his sisters preferred and grabbed a bottle.

Wine, corkscrew and a glass in one hand, his beer in the other, he headed to the big patio. He took another long drink of his beer after opening the wine bottle and pouring her a glass.

He sat with his feet up on another chair and looked out to the surf. It was calling to him. It always did. He wasn’t sure what to do now that he’d claimed her. He was off patrol, probably until he completed the mating ceremony, but they were inundated with beasts and fucking possessed. He frowned, not thrilled at leaving his brothers to do all the work.

How long could he hold out for Sirena to come up with something to prevent Rain from seeing his blood memories? No one so innocent should see that.

He heard and felt when she came out onto the patio. He got up from his chair as she sat next to him and stared at the wine. She smelled of shampoo and coconut. Her wet hair looked sexy as it fell around her face. She was in a short tan skirt and purple tank top that hugged her beautiful breasts.

He cleared his throat. “I poured you a glass.” Was she remembering comparing him to the wine? He hoped not. “There are plenty of other things to drink. Are you hungry?”

She shook her head as if in a daze. “What’s going on? Now you’re concerned? I really don’t get how you can hate me so much and then flip so fast to being sweet and acting like you give a shit about me.” She didn’t shout, just stared at him, a little wrinkle over her nose.

Chapter 18

Guardian Beach House, Tetartos Realm

Rain watched Dorian, waiting. He was gorgeous sitting in the partial shade, looking out to the beautiful beach. She wondered where exactly they were, but in the end it didn’t matter.

He was in the same clothes he’d worn when he’d barged into the treatment room at Paradeisos. His large body lounged back in the chair. A bottle of beer dangled in one hand. He gazed off for a moment, letting her really study him. His hair was wild and looked wet as it stuck out in every direction. She stared, remembering just how soft those strands were. His entire appearance was deceptive. She wanted to believe that things would go smoothly now that he’d claimed her, but that was a child’s dream, nowhere near realistic. Things were likely to change at any moment. She sat waiting for an answer to her question. She needed to understand what was going on in his mind. Figure out what he’d do next, and be prepared.

“I never fully realized how much it affected you. I was too focused on not allowing the mating to happen; I never took into consideration that you would suffer. I’ve always thought the Immortal suffered the brunt of the frenzy.”

“Why couldn’t it happen?” She knew some, what Sirena had told her, but she needed to know from him.

“There are things you don’t know about me.”

She debated whether to tell him she knew some of it already, but he floundered for long moments, so she prodded him along. “Sirena explained some.”

His head turned to her, eyes flashing darkly. “I should have guessed she would.”

“Considering you were hiding, someone had to tell me what was going on. She tried to explain away your desertion. I appreciated her attempt at making the rejection more about what you’d been through and not so much a complete denial of having me as a mate,” she mused wryly.

She raised an eyebrow, daring him to deny he’d been an ass.

He let out a self-deprecating laugh and took another drink. “If you know, then you understand that I couldn’t keep an Immortal alive. How do I, out of all the others, get a mate? As my mate, your big gift is a target on your back.”

“Bullshit. I was already a target because Alyssa and I are close.”

“Rational or not, nymph, that was a huge part of my staying away.” His eyes pierced her, and they looked ancient in that moment. He dressed like a young male with his bright tee shirts and blue-tipped hair. It was so easy to forget just how old he was.

“Please don’t treat me like an idiot. That might have been part of it, but that’s not all.”

He eyed her and nodded. “There were so many reasons I’d come up with, and that was just one of the big ones. Would you want to take something so rare and precious when you were the reason your friend was never going to have that? Because of your bad judgment? Drake said that fighting in the rings wasn’t a good idea, that getting too close to the Immortals wasn’t a good plan, but I didn’t listen, Cahal died and never gets a mate. But I do?
I’m
the lucky one? Over my brothers who deserve it so much more?” He frowned and shook his head. He looked back out to the sea and took another long drink of his beer, finishing it and setting it on the table in front of them.

She sat pondering that. She could understand the guilt. He was a Guardian meant to protect, and he would see his friend’s death as his fault. Even if it wasn’t. It didn’t make what he’d done to her any better, but at least she understood where his mind was. It was a lot like Sirena had said. Guilt, fear… Would she have felt the same if she’d gotten Alyssa killed? Maybe. “Would your friend have wanted you to suffer? You didn’t kill him, Dorian.”

He looked at her again. His eyes hard. “I didn’t save him either. He was there because of me. He was killed because of my shitty taste in females. I knew she was a bitch. That she wasn’t a good female, but I arrogantly assumed I could handle anything that came. I never imagined she would work with Cyril. I should have, she was that twisted.” His voice rose with each word. He honestly felt that he caused his friend’s death.

She shook her head, irritated. It was obvious that he wasn’t loosening the hold on all that guilt. Did that mean he was going to run again? Not knowing what was coming was frustrating. “Wow, you’re right. As a God among men, you should have known what was going to happen. It really is your fault that he died because some sick bitch got greedy. I’m sure your friend would love how you’ve honored his memory.”

His gaze snapped to her, surprised.

She added more matter-of-factly, “I would have thought something simpler would have worked. A memorial. Maybe naming your firstborn after him, but hey, suffering and making me suffer along with you was good too.” She shook her head and leaned forward to grab the wine he’d poured; she needed it now.

She was just lifting her hand for the drink when she was hauled into his lap, his mouth landing over hers. Her breath caught in her throat, and her lips parted, letting their tongues tangle. He kissed like nothing she’d ever known. It was enough to make her breasts ache and panties wet.

Enough. You’ve made your point. It wasn’t rational thought that ruled me.
His words were a slow glide inside her mind.

They rule you still. It was jealousy that finally made you claim me. If you hold onto the horrors of the past, where does that leave me? You’ll only run again.
She directed the words, hoping that they connected as her mind started to blur with what his mouth was doing to her.

I’d already decided to come for you. Drake said the same damn thing about Cahal. He also pointed out how much I was making you suffer. It was never my plan to hurt you, Rain. I just wasn’t thinking about anything but my own guilt and fears.

Having him inside her mind felt so damned intimate. She loved and hated it all at once.

It did hurt me. I know you don’t know me, but the rejection felt personal. I deserved some kind of explanation. I didn’t enjoy the pitying looks from your brothers as I walked around constantly aroused. I didn’t earn the shitty things you said to me, and I really didn’t deserve to have you spying on me the entire time I suffered. Alone.

He broke the kiss and looked at her, regret and pain filled his eyes. The back of one knuckle trailed down her cheek as his eyes searched hers. She knew he already housed too much shame for his friend and she was only adding to it, but she needed him to see that there was more happening besides what happened a hundred years ago.

“You’re ripping my heart out, Rain. No, you didn’t deserve any of it, and I’m sorry. I said those things to drive you away. Everyone told me how great you were, but that made me hate the thought of claiming you even more. I don’t deserve a mate, Rain, but I won’t leave again. You’re mine now. Tell me how to make it right.”

Her heart ached at the heated tenderness in his eyes; she knew just what he hoped would make it up to her. Damn male. He was so damaged, and now he was hers, and she didn’t know how to fix him.

Their breathing was ragged, and she felt his hard cock throbbing as she straddled his muscled thighs. She blew out a breath. She was already more than happy to screw him again. Feed the damn hunger that was only slightly sated from their first time. “I don’t honestly know what will make it right. I don’t trust you not to run off and trample my feelings again. I guess only time will tell.” She should move off his lap, but she didn’t want to. She wanted to feel all of him again. It was stupid. She would only tie herself tighter to him, but her body had suffered long enough. She wasn’t going to do it anymore. The cream Sirena put in the bag was amazing. Her bruised pelvis felt completely healed.

“Are you still hurting?” Her whole body tingled at the silky tone to his voice. “I wish I knew what you were thinking right now.”

She narrowed her eyes at the reminder that he’d been in her head. “I’m glad you enjoyed hearing all of my personal thoughts. Why don’t you open your shield and let me hear what you’re thinking?” She raised an eyebrow in challenge.

He sat there for a moment just staring at her before grinning seductively. Shockingly, his thoughts began sifting through her mind.

Pain. Arousal. Guilt. Hope that she’d used the cream. Hope that she didn’t hurt anymore, because he wanted inside her more than he wanted to breathe. He wanted to bend her over the patio table and eat her pussy and rim her little ass.

She panted and circled her hips on his lap as images of him pushing inside her body filtered into her mind. So many positions. She thought she might die from the need he stoked. Soon it cut off, and she fought for breath. She wanted him, so much. Her skirt was up to her hips, and his palms were caressing her ass as she moved against him. They would talk again later, for now she needed him to stop the ache.

“My thoughts stay along those lines,” he murmured next to her cheek. The fingers of one hand pushed back her hair, and he ran his tongue over her ear and neck. His other hand pulled her hip into his jean-clad cock. “I love your neck.”

She moaned as he spoke against her sensitive flesh. Her hands went to his shirt, and he leaned forward, allowing her to slide it over his head to fall on the ground next to them.

His eyes flashed. “You want my cock right here? Where anyone could see us if they port in?”

The image of Conn or Bastian walking up and watching her ride Dorian’s cock filtered through her head. She knew he was showing her his wicked side.

He grinned seductively as her tank top joined his shirt on the ground. His fingers quickly flipped the snap to her bra, and it followed her top. He lifted her higher and nipped at her hard nipples. She felt the hard muscles of his torso between her thighs. “These are so damn beautiful. Your tight little ass and these gorgeous breasts haunt me nearly as much as that piercing. I saw it the first time I looked through your eyes. I watched you trail water over your tight nipples and over your pussy and wanted to show you just what the water could do to you.”

She moaned at the thought of him watching her get off. “What exactly can you do that I can’t?” She could barely speak the words. He made her dizzy. His body was so hot, and her hands were all over his tattooed shoulders. The ink depicted a view of looking through rippling waves.

He tilted her chin up to look at him. His eyes danced with heated playfulness. “I can command it to be so much harder than you can. I can push it deep, just like my cock. Use it to hold you down as I pump inside your hot little pussy. Do you want that, Rain? Do you want me to be dirty with you?”

“Mmm.” She was incapable of speech at the moment. She’d never experienced anything so damn hot, and she knew it wasn’t just the mating that got her. It was him and his dirty mouth.

She was too far gone to stop. She unbuttoned his jeans, the backs of her hands grazing his hot abs, and she nearly groaned. Before she was able to caress the cock that came out to greet her, she was lifted up and carried inside. Her skirt and panties met his pants on the bathroom floor. She knew the shower was big; she’d just used it. She stepped in and turned around. The water came on as he crowded her against the wall. She was more excited than she ever dreamt possible. He was going to do hot and wicked things to her, and she was dying to experience every bit of it.