Destined to Play (20 page)

Wave after wave after wave of intense sublime pleasure …

Creating orgasmic flows of energy …

As if my body has never before reached true orgasm …

How long can this last?

I release a silent guttural scream, long and hard though it can’t be heard.

And immediately inhale deeply and desperately as though I’m a sexual newborn drawing its first breath, urgently seeking oxygen for survival.

My arched back finally releases from its rigid, captive state as I gasp for more air and allow the oncoming bliss to encompass me entirely. I groan with joy and heat and freedom and ecstasy and leave this earthly world to experience heavenly bliss … I am the sex goddess of the universe …

‘Oh, Alexandra. You are exquisite. You have blown our minds.’

‘And our analysis.’

‘Absolutely. Beyond all projections.’

Is someone talking? Don’t know, don’t care …

I’m so very far away …

All I know is that the vibrations pounding through my body are truly, fucking unbelievable!

And I am absolutely, comprehensively shattered.

‘Alexa! Can you hear me? Are you okay? Here, please drink this.’

I can smell delicious hot chocolate. Someone helps me sit up. I am on a firm bed of some sort, with soft cotton sheets.

‘Be careful. It’s hot.’

Something touches me and brings a cup to my lips.

It tastes like heaven and its heat cascades through to my chest.

‘Jeremy …’ My voice is barely a whisper.

‘Don’t strain, this will help your voice. Here, have some more.’

I finish the drink.

‘That’s it, now snuggle in. Understandably, you’re exhausted, it’s time for you to rest.’

He lays me down again, covers me up with a feather quilt and seems to secure me in place.

It’s warm and cosy and he’s right, I’ve never felt more exhausted.

‘Go to sleep, sweetheart, we’ll talk later. You were beyond my wildest dreams.’ He kisses me gently on the lips and smoothes my forehead. I begin to waft into a subconscious state …

dreams … sounds like a good idea.

‘All good here. Our work is done, for the time being at least. Great job, Dr Quinn.’

‘We’ll just pack up the rest of our things and leave you both to continue on your journey.’

‘Remember, J, the next twenty-four hours are critical, and the situation will need to be closely monitored for the next three or four days. Confidentiality is paramount. She must not see or speak to anyone other than you. Our competitors would kill for these kinds of results.’

‘Of course, not a problem, I have it completely under control.’

‘Well done, gentlemen. Until next time. This has certainly exceeded our expectations. We shall look forward to the complete results. Keep us posted in the meantime.’

‘Will do.’

Doors slam shut.

I’m not sure what the distant voices are talking about as they swirl around me. I feel so mellow. I vaguely hear engines vibrate beneath me …

And I drift into a totally unconscious state.

Part VI

‘The magnitude of a sensation is proportional to the logarithm of the intensity of the stimulus causing it.’

— Fechner’s Law, 1860

M
y fingers greedily feel for their surroundings.

Luxurious, soft delights. They explore a silky mound and discover its pinnacle.

I curl up in delight. What is this I have discovered? A breast?

I cup it and feel its suppleness against the palm of my hand. I play with its mountain peak until it hardens, and then have the good fortune to discover another.

I tease it to life so it matches its twin.

These are the softest pillow breasts imaginable. Oh so reactive, so full, so very changeable under my touch.

I continue my playing, my teasing … they just feel too good to pry myself away.

Another hand gently touches the breast.

‘They do feel amazing don’t they?’ says Jeremy’s voice softly.

I pull my hands away, embarrassed. I thought I was alone. ‘Oh, I didn’t realise you were here. I’m sorry.’

‘Nothing to apologise for, Alex. They are yours to touch.’ I can hear the smile in his voice, which reminds me I’m still blind.

Strong arms wrap around me, cradle me.

‘And of course I’m still here. I said I’d look after you.’

My thoughts feel vague and scattered.

‘Have I been dreaming?’ I smile to myself … Ah yes, amazing dreams and fantasies, like nothing I’ve ever experienced before in my life. My body reacts instantly to the memory, the intensity of feelings trembling through me.

‘Are you okay?’ Jeremy asks urgently, his voice concerned.

‘Oh, yes … but I’m not sure … what happened, Jeremy … where are we?’

I suddenly feel a dull pain across my buttocks as I ask these questions and instinctively stop myself from asking more.

‘Shh, just relax. You have been through so much.’ He gently strokes my hair.

Still in a fog, I decide this is the best option. As I snuggle into his perfect, firm chest I raise my hand to my eyes, confirming the presence of the silky blindfold.

‘Yes, it is still there, sweetheart. It will be for just a little longer.’ He kisses my hands, keeping them away from my face. He places a warm duvet over me.

I hear his voice from within his chest, but not his words. It lulls and soothes my thoughts like fluffy clouds floating across a blue sky. I’m in a blissful state, so very content just to be warm and safe and close to him. He could be reading me a story, a poem, a newspaper article for all I comprehend. I am unable to decipher his words … I hear his heartbeating with one ear and perhaps rain pounding against a window with the other and I concentrate on both sounds rather than what Jeremy is saying. I zone back in to his voice in time to hear, ‘Are you thirsty, hungry?’

Wonderful idea. ‘Is there any more hot chocolate? It warms me up from the inside out.’

‘Sure, I’ll make some more.’

The mattress moves as he shifts his weight and I feel like I’m falling. I grab his arm anxiously.

‘It’s alright, sweetheart, I’m not leaving you. I’m just getting your drink. Try not to move around too much.’

‘It feels so weird to move, like I’m really heavy.’

I hear him making noises. It sounds like he is in a kitchen which seems odd in a hotel room.

He returns and places my fingers around the mug. I can’t quite grip it firmly enough.

‘Let me do this for you.’ He brings the warm liquid to my lips.

‘Ahhh, thank you, you do make a great hot chocolate, Jeremy.’

I picture myself sitting here blindfolded, with Jeremy and a hot chocolate, after all I have just been through. It is as if we are completely ignoring the elephant in the room. For some reason this thought sets me off into a fit of the giggles. I can’t contain the laughter that erupts from within me at this thought, as if releasing all my nervous tension.

‘What’s so funny?’ Jeremy grabs the mug from me before I drop it.

I am gasping for air and my stomach starts to ache from the spasms as I try to explain to Jeremy what is so funny. I can’t get the words out because I’m laughing so much, which sets me off again. I hear Jeremy chuckling now too, probably at me. I don’t care, I haven’t laughed this hard in years; it hurts but it feels good. My eyes are streaming. I try to contain the spasms overtaking me, to get some breath into my lungs. I’m going to wet myself. I move to the edge of the bed and collapse straight onto the floor, still paralysed with convulsions.

Jeremy is instantly at my side. ‘Oh, my god, Alexa! Are you hurt?’ His words come out in a rush.

‘Ba — ba — bath — bath ro — om,’ I frantically utter between gasps.

Jeremy scoops me up off the floor and places me on the toilet just in the nick of time. My bladder explodes in relief and appreciation. I take the opportunity to calm my stomach muscles and inhale much-needed air as the release of my bladder continues. I look directly into his concerned eyes and wonder why he looks so worried. It takes me a moment to register that I am, in fact, looking at a vague image of Jeremy’s face. Excitement flushes through me.

‘I can see! It’s still very dark and you are extremely fuzzy, but here you are, in front of me,’

I blurt out rather obviously. ‘When … How … Has it been forty-eight hours?’

‘More or less. The final effect of the drops will have diluted more quickly given that fit of hysterics and the blindfold came loose when you fell off the bed. So, yes, you will have complete vision back in a few hours or so.’

His words bring me instant relief, but also a strange sadness knowing our time together is coming to a close. It is weird, like opening my eyes in the middle of a cave, where I can’t see anything but what’s directly in front of me.

With my vision not restored enough to absorb much more than his blurry face, I feel quite unsteady and rather self-conscious that I’m sitting on the toilet staring at him as he holds me in position. Embarrassed that he is seeing me like this, I quickly wipe and get up to wash my hands, exceptionally grateful for my new-found independence. I take a step forward but my legs immediately go limp and I crumple into a heap. So much for independence.

‘That’s why I’m holding you, sweetheart, you’re not quite with it yet.’ Jeremy anchors his arms around me and I’m manoeuvred to the basin. Something about his face makes me smirk at him in the mirror.

‘I’ll be fine, really, you don’t need to fuss. I just need a moment.’

He holds his hands up in mock surrender, which I take as a positive sign. With a concentrated effort, I lean against the basin and wash my hands and face. As I turn around to face him, my legs fail beneath me again and this time he scoops me up before I hit the floor.

‘What on earth? I just don’t understand …’

‘That’s enough. You are not capable of looking after yourself at this point in time. That’s exactly what I’m here to do,’ he adds sternly.

With these words, I am whisked out of the bathroom back into the bedroom and placed carefully in the centre of a large bed.

For some reason, my uselessness sets me off once again into a series of giggles and I can’t even raise my head in protest. I realise then that I won’t be able to trust my legs for a little while yet. The look on Jeremy’s face registers with my brain that I’m staying put, regardless.

‘What am I going to do with you?’ At least he has a small smile.

‘What have you done to me? Don’t you think that is the important question here?’ I say to him, recognising my mind is starting to clear from the fog.

‘Fair point. There is a lot to explain, I suppose.’

‘Yes, I suppose there is,’ I agree.

‘Why don’t you start with what you remember?’

I raise an eyebrow at him. Oh, here we go … his clever trickery to get me to go first. He quickly adds, as if reading my thoughts, ‘Alex, sweetheart, you know I’ve always been honest with you.’

‘Yes, that’s true, even too honest at times.’ I can’t muster the energy to argue with him so I let my mind flick back to the memories of the weekend. I notice the strangeness of my memories as feelings come flooding back to me instead of clear images. In some cases I have a perception of what I believe my memories are but they aren’t represented visually, I just get an extraordinary rush of sensations through my body as I remember certain aspects. It’s really weird. I shake my head … my brain isn’t ready for this sort of overload.

‘I remember fear, excitement, shame, then exhilarating pain and pleasure bundled up so comprehensively it seems impossible to distinguish which was more overwhelming. Then sexual tension and arousal and all-encompassing energy; like the force of life itself was whisking through my veins, but it all seems somewhat muffled now.’ I know my cheeks flush as these words flow out in a jumbled mess. He strokes my hair in understanding and pulls the covers up to keep me warm. He is being very attentive.

‘What’s wrong with my head, Jeremy? I can’t think straight.’

‘It’s the sedative. It should be completely out of your system within twenty-four hours.’

‘What, you gave me a sedative?’

‘Yes, just to allow your body some time to recover. It was in the first hot chocolate I gave you before we came here. I should have remembered how much anything like that affects you so it may take a while longer for the impact to wear off.’

My head swirls with his words, as a distant memory comes flooding to mind.

I had gone to a bar in Kings Cross for a girls’ night out and ended up talking to some
guys we didn’t know. One drink later, I felt strange and woozy so my friends called
Jeremy, as they were really worried about me. Apparently, the guys took off quickly once
they realised we had male friends arriving, so we assumed they must have spiked my
drink. I was totally out of it, couldn’t stand up and don’t remember another thing. It was
scary how quickly something like that could take effect.

I wake up at Jeremy’s place some time the next day to him prodding and poking my
body and mumbling to himself. Feeling way less than average, I roll over in a daze and
continue my slumber. The next time I wake up, Jeremy delivers a cup of tea, which I think
is really sweet. I reach my arm out from the covers to take the cup and notice my arms
are covered in blue, red and green markers. I try to remember what happened last night
but my mind draws a complete blank, not a good sign. I place the teacup down carefully
and peek under the sheets to find my body entirely naked, covered with the same
markings: lines, arrows, circles — all colour coded. I groan in disbelief, not really
wanting to see if the other side was the same, but know it will be as I catch the cheeky
grin on Jeremy’s face.

‘Well?’ I raise my eyebrows to him, awaiting his explanation.

He’s like an excited puppy as he jumps on to the bed beside me.

‘Well … Alex … I was bored while you were out of it for so long, but I didn’t want to
leave you by yourself. I needed to ensure you were okay. So I decided not to waste my
time and do some study.’