Determinism (Cara & Abel's Story) (18 page)

“I can drive us all,” Abel says. “My truck has a lot of room, and that way you ladies can all drink and I’ll be the responsible driver.

“Cara, he’s a keeper,” Amber says shooting up from the couch and heading towards the door.

I know Abel is trying to earn brownie points with my mom and I give him credit for it. She nods her head and we all head outside, Abel helping each of us climb into his monster of a truck. “Sorry the truck’s so tall,” he says.

“Don’t be sorry,” Amber says. “This thing is bad ass.”

Pulling away from the house, I program where we’re headed into the GPS. The ride is eerily quiet minus the voice of the navigation as she says,
‘Left turn ahead.’

Thankfully, it’s a quick drive, and Amber has helped by making some small talk asking about our life at home in Colorado.

Arriving at my aunt’s house for the party, I’m struck again by its beauty. The house is a long, sprawling ranch with a tile roof and walls of signature Arizona stucco, and surrounded by the typical rocks and cacti. My little cousin, Zane, runs out and greets us, slamming into my legs. It makes me a little wobbly because of the heels I’m wearing, and Abel steadies me as I look down at the six-year-old who is grinning at me with his missing front teeth. He is my Aunt Chanel’s youngest son and she is the youngest of my dad’s siblings. Zane removes himself from my legs and grabs my hand, dragging me inside the house.

“How are you, buddy?” I ask.

“Good. I miss you, Care-bear.”

“I miss you too, buddy.”

“Are you going to come and stay with us again?”

“I’m afraid not, little man. I have a job now and a lot of people depending on me back home in Colorado.”

“Ahhh, okay.”

“Is that my Care-bear?” my Aunt Chanel asks from another room. Zane gets distracted and runs off with some of the other kids, and I grab Abel’s hand giving him a reassuring squeeze. My mom and sister separate from us and go into the living room. I don’t follow them because I have to see Chanel. She is so much like my dad and we’ve always been close. Abel kisses my shoulder just as we walk in and she sees him do so.

His actions don’t faze her one bit as she moves to hug both of us. That’s just how she is, plus I have gushed over the phone about Abel, so she knows how happy he makes me. Pulling away from us she looks between Abel and I. “Abel, I hope you don’t mind the hug, I’m just overjoyed for my Care-bear.”

“Geez, will you stop calling me that? I’m not a kid anymore,” I say.

Laughing, she says, “You’re right, you’re not. You are a gorgeous young woman. It’s been far too long since I’ve seen you.”

“Thanks,” I respond. “I miss you too.”

“Thank you for having us today,” Abel says. “And I don’t mind the hug.”

“Oh, it’s my pleasure. Now you two better head out back. Nana is dying to see you and to meet Abel. We’ll catch up in a bit.”

Heading outside there are crowds of people and we are constantly stopped, greeted, hugged, and chatted up. There are so many people I haven’t seen in years. It seems to take forever until we finally reach my Nana. She is sitting with her back to us on a wooden bench that Chanel put here in my dad’s memory. It overlooks the red rocks, which is quite a stunning view.

She is knitting, and you’d be hard-pressed to find a time when she isn’t. “Nana,” I say as we step around the bench.

“Oh darling, you made it. You look lovely,” she says embracing me in a tight hug.

Letting go of Abel’s hand, I wrap both of my arms around her. She means the world to me. This woman has been there for me through every experience in my life whether it was good or bad. I can’t think of a time when she couldn’t make me smile; there is just something about her that makes everything better. Being in her arms makes everything right, regardless of the issues with my mom.

When we break our hug, I can’t wait to introduce her to Abel. “Nana, this is my boyfriend, Abel.”

She hugs him too. “So this is the one, Cara?” I feel embarrassed that he hears her question. I told her the other day that I felt like he was the one for me. “Yup, this is him.” She grabs his hand guiding him to sit down next to her. As their conversation begins to flow, I sneak away. I know she is harmless and only wants to get to know him better. She’s a little kooky in her old age, but in a good way. She’s funny as hell, so I know they’ll enjoy their time together. I look back over my shoulder as I wander off and she has her hand on his cheek. I can tell she instantly loves him, just like I do. Do I love him? Honestly I can say that I do. I can’t believe I’ve fallen in love, and with no one other than Abel. Glowing inside with this realization, I flutter among the guests and enjoy myself while my Nana spends time with Abel. I steer clear of my mother as I notice she is drinking heavily. It feels like we just got here when the sun starts to set. Most everyone has left, and it has been so great to see all of my family members. The day passed with record speed and now we have to say goodbye. This is always the hardest part.

Hugging my Nana, tears fill my eyes. Every time I leave her, I feel like it may be for the last time, and the older she gets, the stronger that feeling is.

Scanning over my face she says, “Don’t cry, honey. We’ll see each other soon. I know there’s a wedding in your future with the strapping, young fellow you’ve snagged. He may not want kids, but keep working on him. I told your mother the same.”

“Nana,” I snap. She smiles at my tone, I’ve never yelled at her and she knows I don’t mean anything by it.

“Yes, dear, do you have something to add?”

Shaking my head, I’m unclear what to say to her. “Did he really say he wants to marry me?” I whisper.

She squeezes my hand and ushers me off of the front porch towards the truck where everyone is waiting. “You’ll have to wait and see. But you’re right, he is the one for you.”

Walking away I give one last wave to my family and climb into the truck. Amber and my mom are laughing when I get in, enjoying their own conversation. I stay quiet as Abel grabs my hand and I let my mind drift to thoughts of a future with him.

Does he really want to marry me? I mean, did he really say that? We’ve never talked about those sorts of things, so I’m kind of shocked to think that’s where his head is. Do I want to get married, and even more — would I be any good at being a wife? I honestly feel dumbfounded, and then there’s the comment my Nana made about how Abel doesn’t want kids. I’ve always hoped for them one day. But honestly, I guess I could go either way. I’m not the warmest person and don’t know how that would be perceived by a child.

If one were to ask, I would say that’s part of the reason why I’ve always fallen fast and fallen hard, deep down I’m searching for the affection my mom never gave me. I wonder what Abel’s reason for not wanting kids is. I’m sure it’s legit, but I’m not about to go and ask him what it is just yet. He squeezes my hand and I look at him.

“You okay?” he asks.

“Yeah. Thank you for going today. I hope it wasn’t too much for you to handle?”

“It was great. I really liked your Nana. She reminds me a lot of my mom.”

“Really?”

“Uh huh. It was nice to visit with her and get that vibe.”

I smile at him and shake my head knowing exactly what he means. “What are you two cackling about back there?” I ask, looking back at my mom and sister as they are laughing uncontrollably. My mom is clearly tipsy, as is my sister. They both continue to giggle, not paying attention to me or my question.

“Mom, did you hear me? What’s so funny?” I ask.

She glares at me and waves me off. “I heard you, Cara. I chose to ignore you. Why doesn’t Abel tell me why he doesn’t want to have kids with you?”

“Oh my God, Mom. You can’t ask people questions like that.”

She has an evil glow in her eyes and I don’t like it. “Abel, don’t answer her.” I forgot how crazy she could be, especially when she is drunk.

“Well, Abel?” she slurs. “Is Cara not good enough for you?”

“Okay. That’s way out of line. I’m not sticking around for anymore of this. I hope you enjoy the rest of your weekend, because we’re leaving,” I say with authority in my tone to show her that I’m not only pissed, but I’m dead serious. I just don’t get where her hateful attitude comes from sometimes. Once we get back to her house, we are packing and driving back. I’m not about to watch her down another bottle of wine before she calls it a night and becomes more belligerent.

After driving for six hours, we decide to stop in New Mexico again and stay at our hotel. Being back in the suite is a surreal feeling. I really love it here. It doesn’t matter that it’s midnight; I feel well-rested and not a bit sleepy. As I flip through the room service menu, I’m debating between chili cheese fries and a banana split. It feels good to be all alone with Abel and far away from my mom.

Abel walks out of the bathroom naked, drying his hair. He looks so yummy; there are small droplets of water on his perfectly sculpted, tattooed body. The towel is covering his cock, as I scan my eyes down him. His bare feet leave a trail of watermarks as he steps over to his suitcase pulling out a pair of sweats, grey, my favorites.

“Do you want me to order you anything from room service?” I ask.

Dropping the towel, he steps on it and then glides his sweats on. “Sure, kitten. What were you thinking?”

“Chili cheese fries and a banana split.”

“Can I share that with you?”

I glare at him.

“Come on, Cara, you don’t want to get that full, especially with what I have planned for you tonight.”

“Fine!” I snap jokingly and dial to order our food.

He tosses a red box on the bed and sits next to it. Ooh, I love presents! Damn this woman for taking so long to take my order! Abel scoots behind me and starts massaging my shoulders. Mmm, that feels amazing. “Have them knock and leave the food in the hallway,” he whispers.

I repeat his instructions and hang the receiver up. “What’s this for?” I ask.

“Just for you. I wanted to give it to you the last time we came here, but I never got a chance since we crashed so early. I’m not letting another opportunity pass us by; open it.”

He places the box on my lap and I notice it’s the same box I gave him his birthday presents in. I open the lid and tucked inside is a satin bag. Reaching in, I pull out a bright red dildo.

I look at him surprised. “What’s wrong with your penis?” I ask.

He laughs. “Nothing is wrong, at least I don’t think there is. This one vibrates and lets both of us pleasure you. I want to watch you slowly slide it in and out of your tight pussy while I do everything else to you that will make you go wild.”

I swallow hard and Abel watches me set it on the bed and then I stand to get undressed for him. I’ve never used a dildo, so I’m a little unsure of what to expect. Taking my time, I expose my breasts as I lift his soft, white t-shirt over my head. Before I can remove my pants he tucks his fingers into the waistband and pushes them down my legs. Slowly, I step out of them standing before him naked. Taking a deep breath, I reach over and pick up … the little red dildo — that’s what I’ll call it — and slide it in my mouth, gradually sucking all the way up and then back down.

Abel’s breathing skips a beat and I watch his hard dick pulsate through his pants. When I remove little red from my mouth it is soaking wet and I take it right to my clit, rubbing back and forth. I walk to the bed and lean back on the pillows.

“Take your pants off,” I demand.

Abel complies and kneels above me as I rub the outside of my pussy. Both of us watch as I move it back and forth. Abel then touches the button on the bottom bringing the vibration to life. It takes my breath away, causing me to orgasm almost instantly. Fighting through the pleasure, I push the button again and this time it starts to pulsate. I can definitely handle this. As pleasure burns through my system, Abel takes little red from me and gingerly slides it inside of me.
Fuck, it’s powerful.
“Take it back, baby,” he commands, handing me the dildo and begins to pay attention to my breasts, sucking on my nipples, all the while deliberately teasing my clit.

Room service knocks on the door and neither of us falters from what we are doing. “Grab your cock,” I tell him, and watch in complete lust as his skillfully trained hand wraps around the hard base of his shaft and moves back up.

“Jesus, you’re fucking hot as hell,” he says.

Closing my eyes, I enjoy the pleasure that is scorching through me. He plunges his mouth onto mine and I gladly accept his tongue. I moan in response and work myself close to oblivion.

He slowly pulls away and says, “Can I do that for you again?”

I let go and lean over grabbing his cock, jerking him just like he was. Abel pushes the button again on little red and I let go, calling out his name as he pulls the dildo all the way out of me and then pushes it back in, over and over and over. Slowing his movements, I stop twitching and he sets little red aside straddling me. His massive frame is pinning me beneath him, his hot dick is resting between my boobs and I grab each one squeezing them around him. Moving backwards and forwards he works himself between my breasts like he’s inside of me.