dibs (3 page)

“Jared?” I asked.

“Samantha?”

I nodded. “Nice to meet you.”

“And you as well. Wow, You exceeded my expectations.”

“Thank you,” I said, sitting on the park bench wondering why his nose was so red. “Which one is your grandson?”

He pointed to a group of children on top of the monkey bars. “The one in the Cubs T-shirt.”

The boy was adorable and reminded me of long ago days when Jake was little. How could time have slipped away so quickly?

“Ah-choo!”

His sneeze surprised me, causing my entire body to jolt.

He pulled out a handkerchief and blew his nose, which explained the inflamed schnoz.

I sat next to this man, honestly knowing there was no attraction, but how vain to ask to be excused from a date.

“Ah-choo!”

My body jolted again. I’d just shaken his hand, coming into direct contact with these germs.

“It’s that time of the year,” he said. “I’ll be blowing for the next three months. Just call me Rudolph.”

He read my mind. “Allergies?”

“Yep.”

“Papa!” a little voice squealed.

Both of us glanced toward the young boy who rested on his belly in the middle of a tire. We both smiled at the cuteness.

“Ah-choo!”

My body jolted. Three months of this?

My work cell phone rang. “Excuse me, Jared?”

It was the hospital.

“This is Dr. Casey.”

“Dr. Casey, the Whitman baby should be here soon. We need you to come in, please.”

“Thank you, Amber. I’ll be there within a half hour.”

Though relief washed through me, when I looked at Jared, disappointment crept into his expression.

“Duty calls?”

I nodded. “Yes. Babies don’t like to wait for us to be ready.”

He leaned back, stretching. “Samantha. You are a very beautiful woman. You should have no need for a dating site. Guys must be beating down your door. Honestly, even though I’m a federal judge, you…are out of my league.”

I began to protest, but his hand coming up stopped me.

“Please. Let me finish. If you ever want a night of fun…just grab a drink sort of thing, please holler. I’d be honored to share a drink with you. In the mean time, stop this website dating. You could run into some real creeps.”

“Jared. Trust me, I already have. Thank you. For all that you said.”

After we said our goodbyes, a small flicker of hope ignited inside of me—not for the perfect man, but for the goodness of humanity. Everything happens for a reason and I needed this encounter. As far as dating…as far as finding Mr. Right… it just wasn’t in the cards for me.

Cruisin’

When I zipped the suitcase and heaved it off the bed, a sharp pain shot through my damn back, tweaking it.

“Son of a bitch!” I shouted to no one, dropping the overweight bag directly onto my toe. There was no pulling it out from under the heavy bag. I had to lift the freaking thing a second time to free my foot, which consequently wrenched my back out further.

“Shit!” I hissed, squeezing my toes and rolling back onto my bed like a two-year-old mid-tantrum. “Shit! Shit! Shit!”

The toenail polish on my big toe was jacked up. As I tried to daintily smooth the almost dry polish, the corner of the toenail broke off.

“You have got to be kidding!” I screamed, pounding my fists on the bed.

I shot up off the mattress, yanked my other suitcase out from under the bed and randomly started transferring…throwing half the clothes and shoes from the heavy bag into the empty one.

In my mind I went down my checklist again. Mail stopped. Paper stopped. Patients covered. Clothes. Swim suits. Sunscreen. Medication. Tickets.

Jake...everything was in place. He was going home from school with a buddy and was staying with friends, for the most part, while I was gone. Bryan was still going to have his weekend visitation; hopefully he showed up. Jake and I had said our goodbyes this morning. But…leaving him was dreadful. The thoughts of having something happen to him while I was away were nearly debilitating.

There was no way to wrap my brain around what I was about to do. A 12-day cruise was ridiculously long, but Becca insisted I go, and rarely did I tell her no. Kat and Juls were already in New Jersey waiting for me.

As I rolled the suitcases over the bamboo floor, I saw Bryan’s stocking cap in the chair. Jake had worn it home from a visit. As much as I wanted to shred it, I left it lying there for Jake. I wanted all parts of Bryan gone. He was not welcome back in this home or in my life. For so long, the admission of letting go was too much to acknowledge, even though we were now officially divorced and had been for a year and a half. I left the light on over the sink so it would be on when Jake checked in.

With a deep breath, I lugged my bags outdoors. Becca met me half way attempting to take one from me.

“Get back,” I shooed her. “I got these.”

The circles under her eyes were not as dark today, but when she smiled the cracks on her lips looked painful.

“I can’t believe you are doing this,” she said.

“You made me!” I accused, slamming her trunk and sliding into the passenger seat. “I’d never leave you or Cali if it wasn’t for you demanding I go.”

“You’re forty! Juls is forty, and so is Kat! Caribbean Seas cruise lines has no idea who is about to board their ship. God, I wish I could be there.”

My heart squeezed in my chest. “You
will
be there. When we turn fifty!” I laughed. “That may be the next time I do something like this.”

We both laughed, and as I looked out the passenger window, I silently prayed she’d still be alive. I needed Becca more than she could know.

“Gate 43,” the Southwest attendant directed.

I reluctantly nodded and turned to Becca. My orange juice from that morning backed up, burning my throat.

“You’re going to be fine,” she said in her soothing voice, gripping my shoulders.

“Fine?”

“Yes.”

“It doesn’t even make sense, Bec! The damn plane weighs… what…like 150,000 pounds. How does that just lift up? How does that defy gravity and not fall to the earth?”

She gripped my shoulders tighter. “Samantha. Don’t try to figure out aerodynamics in the next ten seconds. Stick to vaginas and listen to me.” Her cracked lips wickedly curled up. “If you crash, it’ll happen so fast you won’t even know it.”

A loud gasp shot out of my mouth, and the ugliest, involuntary guttural moan crawled up my throat.

“I can NOT believe you just said that.” My teeth clenched together so tightly my jaw ached. “But then I also can’t believe you set me up with a crippling nail biter who had less manners than Andrew Dice Clay or Jay the limp…”

“Oh shut up. Jay drinks too much. That’s his only problem,” she interrupted. “Go get on the plane and have fun! You don’t even know what that is anymore. Your anxiety has only gotten worse since you’ve gotten older and since I’ve gotten sick. Enough already! You can’t control everything, Sam.”

“Well, I can certainly control who I fall in love with!”

Her lips twisted together as she rolled her eyes.

Serious Becca was way harder to take than Fun Becca. There was no part of me that wanted her to hurt, therefore I typically tried to do what she asked. So…I plastered on a smile.

“I love you.”

“I love you too. Now go have fun.”

After an official salute, quick hug and fake smile, I headed up the escalator. Forcing myself to turn and wave at her, the only thought in my head was the escalator not being properly supported as it inched upward. There I stood, stuck between an older couple and a family of four—all with smiles. I swear to God, I wanted to pull a Jason Bourne and knock all of them out of the way so I could dash one way or the other on this metal, man-made contraption. Instead, I counted beneath my breath, waiting to reach the top.

An arrow to gate 43 directed me down a crowded walkway. Stores all along the busy strip were filled with waiting passengers killing time. Some kids towed their own luggage down the traffic way. A smile touched my lips as I thought about Jake pulling his Thomas the train suitcase years ago.

Nestling into a seat in the gate 43 area, I watched a big plane taxi in at the next gate. As hard as I fought with the breathing I’d been taught, my chest tightened.

“You from Jersey?” a guy next to me asked with a strong eastern accent.

The Quaker State thick grease smeared through his hair kept his mane contained, and the gold nugget that hung from the massive chain around his neck reminded me of Flavor Flav’s clock and one of my hideous dates.

“No,” I said as I fought my lip pulling up in disgust. There was no part of me that wanted to be bitchy, it unfortunately just happened of its own free will. Once again, I was reminded of how truly lucky I was to have held onto the three girls in my life. The true blessing was that two of them lived in different states. So my opportunities to run them off were limited.

“Where are you from?” he continued.

“What state are you in?” I asked sarcastically.

“California?” he asked like he was unsure.

I winked, making a clicking noise with my mouth. “You got it.”

“What makes you go to New Jersey?”

“What
makes me
go to New Jersey,” I restated with a hint of sarcasm in my tone. “My very large boyfriend,” I smiled, trying to end the chatter.

His brow lowered. “Is that a yolk?”

“A yolk?”

“Yes. A yolk. A funny. Ha ha.”

“A joke?” I clarified, emphasizing the sound of the j.

“Yes! A yolk.”

I scratched my jaw, wondering why I had picked this spot to sit.

“No,” I lied. “It’s no yolk. I have three big black guys that share me and they lust white weenie blood, Excuse me,” I said, walking toward the magazine stand in the middle of the walkway.

“Dr. Casey!”

I heard my name and turned toward the greeting, hoping I could endure an additional run in.

“Amy. Hi.” I breathed out.

“I only have a second because we are getting ready to board, but I wanted to say hi. The baby’s first trip!” Her enthusiasm made me smile.

The tiny baby slept peacefully in her mother’s arms. Looking at the healthy infant was the best part of my job. This is why I did what I did.

I gave her a thumbs up as she dashed in the opposite direction.

Once in my seat on the plane, I fastened my seat belt and pulled on the strap, tightening the belt and nearly cutting off circulation to my lower half.

“You know,” an older lady next to the window said. “I never understood the point of having seat belts in airplanes. I mean what good are they really going to do in a crash?” she laughed.

My chest tightened, stealing my ability to breathe, and I gasped. “Oh my God,” I uttered beneath my breath and gave the strap one more tug.

“The last plane I was on, the turbulence was so bad we would have bounced out of our seats had we not had them on though, so I guess it is a good thing.”

I wanted to punch the lady in the throat. I hoped not responding in any way would let her know to shut up!

The flight attendant was screwing the door shut…like literally with a steering wheel thingy. Silently I prayed the Xanax would kick in soon so there would be no need to tolerate…people… or life for that matter.

The town car reeked of smoke but seemed otherwise clean. The girls were twenty minutes from the airport and the quiet ride gave me time to unwind…sober up from the double dose of Xanex. When the driver parked, I threw my neck from side to side, trying to relieve the whiplash from the stop and go driving.

The sunlight blasted through the door when he opened it. The brightness forced me to squint, but not before I saw them running at me.

“SAM!” one of them shouted. The screech echoed beneath the canopy of the hotel.

Juls’ body hit me with the force of solid muscle…exactly what she was. Her brown hair bounced in a messy bun.

“Jesus. You look thin!” she said.

Kat shoved her to the side. “Leave her alone, Juls. She looks fine.”

A berry scent in her shampoo rushed through my nose as Kat pulled me close.

“You do look great, Sam.”

“Great? The bitch is skinnier than I am and that is not ok.”

Kat winked at me, her blonde hair falling around her heart-shaped face.

“A couple of years ago, I was heavier,” I acknowledged.

“Heavier?” Juls asked rhetorically. “You looked like you’d eaten your kid rather than had one.”

“Juls!” Kat screeched. I crossed my arms over my chest, glaring at Juls. “RULE 15: Never make your friend’s weight an issue.”

She shot me a tight-lipped smile and then grabbed my suitcase. “Maybe that was exaggerating. You look great now, so whatever.”

“Dibs,” Kat whispered, and both Juls and I spun around in time to see the Harley riders decked out in their jeans, leather boots, bandanas, and body hugging T-shirts. There was no doubt as to the one Kat referenced. He demanded the attention of every guy and girl. Our eyes followed him as he swung his leg over his bike. When he started the engine, the rumble reverberated in my chest.

“You’re married, Kat,” I said over the roar of the bike.

“Doesn’t matter, Sam. Dibs overrules everything. You know that.”

“Clearly, we need to change the rules as time has passed. What’s the point in calling dibs if you can’t have the guy?”

The Jax Teller look alike lowered his reflective sunglasses, studying us…all three of us…now there was an idea.

Kat continued to talk. “Samantha. We’ve called dibs on hundreds of men and how many times did we ever sleep with them or did something come to fruition? Not very often! If ever…”

“Yeah, Sam. That’s the game. The rules have been the same for twenty-five years,” Juls added.

Truth. The game started when we were sixteen. No matter where we were, if one of us said Dibs out loud, the remaining two began searching for the hot guy within a hundred yard radius.

All three of us shrugged at each other, shook our heads and paraded into the hotel. Tomorrow I was getting on a cruise ship, heading out into deep water and hoping we’d all survive. Love was the furthest thing from my mind.