Disillusion Meets Delight (5 page)

It was a chilly autumn Saturday as Ian stepped out for his morning run.  He loved to be active.  It stemmed as far back as childhood.  His mother could never keep up with his wild energy and spent much of her time enrolling him in activities from karate to water polo.  It was something that Ian appreciated to this very day.  As an athletic young man in high school, he kept fit and never had difficulty with meeting girls.  A lacrosse scholarship kept him at University of Virginia for four successful years and earned him a degree in Business Marketing.  After college, he spent some time with friends backpacking through Europe.  Very cliché but it helped him focus on where he wanted to attend grad school.  He was torn between Northwestern and Georgetown.  Although he loved Chicago, he decided to come back home.  Ian loved the hustle and bustle of the city but there was something more to Georgetown.  Perhaps it was the myriad streets loaded with shops and restaurants and variety of people gathered on the sidewalks.  Perhaps it was because it was a hop and a skip from the Kennedy Center or maybe it was the great athletics.  Whatever the reason may have been, it was the best decision he could have made.  He got a great education from a wonderful school and consequently was able to get a great job, even if it did transfer him to the other side of the country. 

Since his arrival in Portland, he was able to meet one woman besides crazy video store girl.  Her name was Jenna and she shared his love of running.  She was already seeing some guy in real estate but he really enjoyed her as a running partner.  They met one morning in the park stretching out and began a conversation that turned into a protein shake at the local juice bar.  Jenna had mentioned that there was a friend she wanted him to meet once but never really did anything about it.  He felt awkward bringing it up because the last thing he wanted was to seem desperate.  He and Jenna met a few times a week to run and he figured eventually she would bring it up again.  He hated being fixed up on blind dates though.  The last blind date he went on was dreadful and if his memory was correct, the ones before that were equally tragic.  Why do friends assume they know your type more than yourself?  Ian dated a broad spectrum of women but they all had similar things in common, they lacked substance and charisma.  He preferred a woman who was educated and liked the arts but wasn’t stuffy.  He liked going out to nice dinners but also loved the idea of ordering pizza and renting a movie.  The older he got, the more difficult it was to find a decent woman.  Was he too picky?  Should he reduce his standards?  Absolutely not, he had decided.  If he was to spend the rest of eternity with one person, it was going to be right person hands down.  Who in the world would want to live with a mediocre soul mate?  Hell no!  Granted, he hadn’t been laid in almost a year and a one night stand was looking better and better, but Maggie kind of complicated things with that.  He didn’t want Maggie to think that a one-nighter was an acceptable way of hanging out with the opposite sex.  It got him through college just fine but his life was a lot different now and sacrifices had to be made, along with a subscription to Maxim.

As he and Jenna ran today, she seemed more distant than normal.  One trait that appealed to Ian was that Jenna was a great conversationalist.  She didn’t divulge her life story but was very open to him about things in her life.  This morning however, her eyes were filled with a story that he was curious to hear but unsure if Jenna was willing to tell it.  After reaching the one mile mark, which was the corner Greek deli, Jenna began to talk. 

“Ian, if you were in a relationship with a woman and she bought a wedding dress even though you had not proposed yet, would you think she was crazy?”  Jenna asked through breaths.

“Um yeah a little bit.  Guys don’t like to be pushed into the marriage game.  My ex-girlfriend told me that if I didn’t propose to her by the end of grad school that she was going to marry Hamilton Stewart instead.”

“What? Who in the world is Hamilton Stewart and why did she have a back up fiancé in the first place?” Jenna asked bewildered.

“He was the guy her parents wanted her to marry.  His family had been friends with her family for years.  He was a member of the polo team and was prepping to dabble in politics, which is very important in D.C.  Politicians equal power and power equals money.” Ian replied.

“So, I’m assuming you told her to go jump into the Potomac?” Jenna asked.

“Well, not in so many words, but something like that.  I knew that I would never meet the standards her family had expected of her future husband.  I also knew that she obviously never loved me so I decided to forfeit and leave the prize to Hamilton.  I hear that they are now married and she is a miserable alcoholic.”  Ian hadn’t spoken about the event to anyone in a long time.  As horrible as his ex was, it was still difficult for him.  He lost a lot of faith in love and vowed that he would never let a woman get to him ever again.  In fact, no woman has risen his temperature since, except for one, the crazy video store girl.  The emotions that she invoked were different though.  Unfortunately, Ian could not pinpoint what exactly they were, which drove him mad. 

“Well Ian, I need to end it here.  My friends have probably been waiting at my door for the last half hour.  It’s time for me to meet my doom.  If you don’t see me next weekend, it’s because my friends have either sent me to the funny farm or shot me.  See ya later!” With that, Jenna jogged off to her apartment.  Ian didn’t really understand what she was referring to but he had a feeling the question about a wedding dress was not hypothetical.   

I was really looking forward to my quiet Saturday morning when the phone rings at 9:15.  “Who in the world is calling me at this time of day?” I wonder aloud with a few obscene alterations.  Even my cat is still in the fetal position on my bed purring away in peaceful bliss.  I reach for the phone, barely opening my eyes because the sun has just begun to peer through the cheap ivory blinds.

“Hello it’s Saturday morning...”  As I begin to utter the words of disgust I am interrupted by Mya’s exclamation.

“Natalie, get up!  We have a major issue.  I’m coming over right now!” She speaks with such exacerbation that I cannot help but be alarmed.

“What happened?!” I am now sat up in bed and have awoken my cat, Sylvester from his slumber. 

“I will tell you when I get there.  Don’t worry, no one is dead.” And with that, she hangs up and arrives at my doorstep 25 minutes later, with Starbucks in her hand.  Thank goodness because I really was about to strangle her little wiry neck for waking me up so early.  Granted, it was my fault for staying up so late watching reruns of the Cosby Show marathon on Nick at Nite but I also planned on staying in bed all morning as well.  I am so good at rationalizing the ridiculous.

“Okay Mya, what is going on?” I ask after a good long sip of my white chocolate mocha full fat with whip.  This must be serious.

“Natalie, you are not going to believe what Jenna did.  You know this guy she has been dating that is apparently the most amazing male since Matthew McConaughey?  Jenna has decided she wants to marry him!”

“What? They have only been dating like, two or three weeks!  Is she crazy?” I exclaim sipping my rather excellent coffee.

“Oh no Nat, it gets worse.  She bought a wedding dress yesterday!” Mya cries as her green eyes bulge out of her head.  I on the other hand have just spit out a whole mouthful of coffee on my recently shampooed carpet.

“What??!!!” I exclaim in disbelief.  “How can she do this?  We were supposed to be there when she buys her dress.  It was going to be an event.  We would go as a group and sip the champagne from the fancy boutique as Jenna tried on numerous dresses that all look phenomenal on her.  After she found the chosen gown, we would have a little cry and reminisce on how we knew she would be the first bride.  Later, we would go to the Park Tower for drinks and sit by the broad window overlooking the city and forever would share the memory of Jenna’s most important purchase!  It was all planned.”  I look down, realizing that I have missed an event in my dear friend’s life that I assumed I would always be a part of.  A tear begins to creep down my face as I look at a photo of Mya, Jenna and I at last year’s Greek festival.

“I know Nat, it breaks my heart too.  What I don’t understand is why she did it in the first place.” Mya states as she walks to the kitchen.

“What do you mean?  Hasn’t Rob, hasn’t Rob proposed?” At this point my mood has shifted from melancholy to flabbergast.     

“Bingo.  The guy hasn’t even asked her to marry him, Natalie.  I don’t know what to do.  I think she has really lost it this time and to make matters worse, she is really mad at me.  She feels like I am not being supportive.”

“Are you kidding me?  How can we support such a ludicrous idea as someone buying a wedding dress before the guy has even proposed and without the two most supportive people in her life?”  I have come unglued at this point and proposed that we make a morning visit to our dear friend Jenna.  Mya concurs and off we go to find some sort of rationale in someone that seems to have lost it all.

As we drove down to Jenna’s apartment I tried to gain composure.  I wasn’t exactly sure how to approach her.  I knew she would be defensive because marriage was a subject that Jenna took very seriously, surprisingly.  If Mya and I came at her like bulldogs, Jenna would run away and we wouldn’t see the white of her eyes.  I was nervous.  Would my emotions get the best of me?  Would Jenna understand our feelings of hurt?  It all seemed so petty in the long run of things, but sometimes it is the little things that make a difference and cause the most pain.

“Mya what are we going to say to her?”  I ask in desperation as we walk up the flight of stairs to Jenna’s apartment. 

“I think we should be casual, you know, like act normal.  Maybe let her bring up the conversation with us.  Once Jenna has initiated it, then we can express our side of the story and let her have it!”

“Mya you know how defensive Jenna can be.  This could be disastrous and furthermore, we could drive her to run off to Vegas the first chance she gets.”

“You are forgetting one important detail my dear.  Real Estate Rob hasn’t even proposed yet.  For all we or Jenna knows, he could have no intentions whatsoever of marrying her.  Just because a guy talks about the future with you doesn’t mean he is sincere about it.  A man will do anything to get you to give him a blow job.” 

So, there we were, outside Jenna’s door.  Actually, we had been out there for several minutes and not a soul had responded to the annoying ring of the doorbell. 

“Well, this is rather anti-climactic.  Here we are, ready to read Jenna the riot act and she isn’t even here to get it.  Did she know we were coming and make an early morning exit?” I ask realizing that Jenna was probably on to what we were going to do and did not want to bear witness. 

“Let’s wait a few minutes more.  Maybe she went out for a run.  She has been doing that quite a bit lately.  I think since she has been dating Rob, she has felt inspired to become perky fitness girl.  Who is this guy anyway Nat?  We haven’t even met him and she has already cut us out of her life and is acting completely different.  So far, I am not impressed.”  Mya is starting to get steamed up again and I wonder if maybe it would be better for us to confront Jenna at a different time.  But it is too late.  As Mya continues her tirade, Jenna strides through the parking lot and up the stairs to her apartment.  When Mya sees her, she instantly stops talking and we just stare at each other.  What was said two minutes ago has now just floated away and Mya, Jenna and I are at a loss for words.   

After his run, Ian decided that maybe he and Maggie should spend some quality time together.  The past couple of weeks had been very busy at the office and he knew that his social butterfly sister was suffering from major cabin fever.  Maybe they could get lunch or he could take her to finish her school shopping.  It was quite difficult for Ian to get used to the fact that he was now mom, dad and brother rolled into one.  Luckily, there was never a dull moment with Maggie around and he had to admit that perhaps it was he who needed to be entertained.  God, he was really beginning to feel like a loser.

“Maggie!  Hey Maggie where are you?” Ian bellowed through the hallway.  Maybe she was still sleeping.  It was almost 11 A.M. though and she usually did not sleep in that late.  As he walked into the kitchen he noticed a piece of paper on the bare stainless steel refrigerator.  It was a note from Maggie. 
Ian, went to the mall with Becky Johnson.  Be back later.  I have my cell.  Maggie. 
Even Maggie, throughout her social drought was able to have a social life.  That was it.  He was going to have to call Jake and have serious drinks tonight. 

Jake Miles was a colleague from work.  He was everything Ian wasn’t: confident, outgoing and a total man-whore.  Every Monday morning for the past 6 weeks, Jake has come into the office with a weekend tale of sex and debauchery.  Granted, it wasn’t the finest trait a guy could have, but Jake’s life seemed far more interesting and Ian was becoming rather tired of playing mother goose.  It was time he began living the life of a single man, at least a bit.  Maybe he could talk Maggie into staying the night at this Becky’s house just in case he got lucky.  For crying out loud, he was already anticipating a one night stand from the mere thought of going out and getting drunk.  It was that moment Ian decided he really needed to focus on an active social life so he didn’t become Jake Miles in a matter of two tequila shots.