Distraction: An underground kings novel (11 page)

“Whatever.” She turns on her heels and heads back into the living room, grabbing a coat off the couch and putting it on, tying the waist. “Your friend still owes me,” she says as she passes by Sven, who is holding open the front door. As soon as she clears the door, Sven slams it closed and presses his hand to the wood, dropping his head forward to hang between his shoulders.

“I was waiting outside of your apartment. I must have fallen asleep, ‘cause when I woke up, your car was gone. Do you know how fucking scared I was?” He turns to face me and pins me in place with the look in his eyes. “First, you run out on me, and then you send me a message saying that you need time to think.” He shakes his head, running his hand over his stubble-covered jaw. “What you need to think about, I have no fucking clue, because you have no idea what I’m feeling.”

“Sven,” I whisper as tears clog my throat.

“No, Mags, I’ve given you time. I’ve done everything but write it in the sky, and you still do not understand I’m in love with you. I loved you before I even understood the pain you caused in my chest.” He steps toward me then pauses as his eyes sweep over me and go soft.

“Then you gave yourself to me last night, gave me a gift that I know I’m not worthy of, but I took it anyway, only to wake up this morning in a fucking nightmare,” he says, and my heart that had been soaring begins to crash to the ground in a fiery ball of flames. “I’m at a loss, baby. For the first time in my life, I feel lost on what to do. I love you, but if this isn’t what you want, I need you to just leave, because I don’t have the strength to do this anymore.”

Tears begin streaming down my cheeks and I try to swipe them away, but they are coming so quickly that I don’t have time to catch them all. There is no way I can walk away from Sven, but the idea of being with him scares me.

“Why?” I shake my head, not sure what I’m asking. Why does he love me? Why is he telling me this now? Why is he doing this to me? Why am I not jumping for joy?

“Why?” he repeats, taking another step toward me and I nod. “I’m not sure. I wasn’t even looking, but then one day you were there and I knew you were it.”

“I’m not even your type,” I point out on a quiet sob as I cover my mouth.

“What type would that be?” he asks tenderly, pulling me up against his body, where I go willingly, melting into him. “The beautiful, sassy, smart type?” he questions, wrapping his arms tighter around me.

“You’re my boss.”

“Yeah, and if you’re
mine
…” He smiles a smile I’ve never seen before then dips his face closer to mine. “I’ll finally be able to do what I’ve wanted to do every time you’ve pranced around my office in those tight skirts and tights with the sweet little designs on them.” I feel heat hit my cheeks then duck my head so he can’t see how his words affect me. I have always been attracted to Sven, but to know he feels the same thing for me is overwhelming.

“We have to talk about last night.” I swallow and pull away, needing to put some distance between us so I can think clearly.

“Let’s go sit down.” His tone has my eyes flying up to meet his. Long gone is the sweet smile, and in its place is rage.

Leading me over to the couch, he sits then pulls me down onto his lap.

“Maybe I should sit over there.” I point to the chair that sits catty-corner to the couch.

“No, I need you right here when we talk about last night.”

Searching his gaze, I agree with a quiet, “Okay.”

“What do you remember about last night?” he asks, pushing some hair behind my ear as his eyes run over me.

“Nothing,” I say, feeling a chill slide down my spine.

“Nothing,” he repeats as his hand on my thigh moves in soothing strokes. “What was your last memory from yesterday?”

“I didn’t want to come home, so I went down to the bar to hang with Eva for awhile. When I got there, she still had customers, so she poured me a cranberry juice and we talked a bit, but she was busy.” I end letting my words hang in the air between us.

Leaning back, he pulls his hand from my thigh and runs it over his face. “When I got to the club, you were laughing and having a good time, but you weren’t blitzed.”

“I don’t know. I don’t remember anything. I don’t even remember seeing you.”

“Jesus,” he groans, wrapping his arms around me, burying his face in my neck. “You had to have been roofied and I didn’t even think about it. I just knew you were finally opening up to me and that was all I saw, so I took my shot.”

“Wouldn’t I have been passed out or something?” I whisper.

“I would never have gone there if I believed for one second that was the case, Mags. You have to believe that.”

I do actually believe he wouldn’t take advantage of me. I know deep down that if he thought for one second I had been drugged, I would have been in the hospital, not in his bed doing whatever it is we did last night.

“I believe you,” I tell him, running my hand through his hair. When his face comes out of my neck, the worry in his eyes is still there. I hate that look on him, but I have no idea how I can fix it.

“Where do we go from here?” he asks so quietly I’m not even sure those are the exact words.

“What do you mean?”

“You told me last night you were in love with me. Was that real? Do we even have a shot at fixing this?”

“You’re my best friend. I don’t want to lose that,” I tell him my deepest fear. Before Sven, I didn’t have anyone to lean on, anyone to protect me. I wasn’t sure I could trust what he was asking of me, but I also knew in my heart I would be stupid not to find out.

“What exactly are you looking for?”

“Forever,” he says immediately, catching me off-guard.

“I’m barely accepting the fact you would want to be with me. I mean, there was a woman in the house naked when I came home tonight.”
A woman who looked like she could have been on the cover of
Maxim
, for God’s sake
, I think but leave out. I know I’m pretty. I have been told that my whole life. I have no qualms about my size-twelve shape, but I have curves that take a lot more to cover.

“I have no idea who she was or how she got inside. I haven’t touched another woman since the night we met. I want you, Mags, and no one else.”

“You haven’t been with anyone sin…since we met?” I breathe out, searching his face for any sign of deceit.

“No one.”

I swear I feel my eyes pop out of my head at that comment. Sven is young, wealthy, and attractive. I know for a fact women throw themselves at him all the time. I have been there on more then one occasion when it’s happened, but if I really think about it, he’s not lying. I have not seen him return any of the advances he’s received. I don’t even see his phone light up constantly like it used to when I first started working for him, with names like Bambie and Lexus. I haven’t heard of him hooking up with anyone at the club.

“I’m no good at relationships,” I admit.

“I’ve never been in a relationship, so my standards are pretty low.” He smiles and I shake my head, wrapping my fingers around the side of his neck, needing him to understand how serious I am.

“After I broke up with Wyatt, I did some soul searching,” I say, ignoring the way his nostrils flare at the mention of my ex. “I realized I’ve constantly picked men who couldn’t let me down, because I didn’t have any expectations for them to live up to. Like Ace—I knew he wasn’t looking for anything serious, or Wyatt, who lived hundreds of miles away. I wasn’t invested in them, because I didn’t have to be.”

“Don’t put me in the same category as them,” he flips me to my back, making me squeak as he moves his face above mine. “This is me and you. I’m invested in us, and I expect you to be, too. I won’t let you off the hook or let you downplay what we have between us.”

“I wasn’t—”

“It sounded like you were making excuses for why this won’t work,” he cuts me off, holding my face in his hands. Crap, that’s exactly what I was doing, reassuring him that when things come to an end that it won’t be his fault, that it’s me who isn’t good at relationships. “I’m not saying things are going to be perfect, but the idea of not having you, all of you, isn’t going to work for me anymore. I tried to ignore what I’m feeling, but you got under my skin, permanently branded yourself there without me even knowing it.”

Tears fill my eyes and slide down into my hair at his confession. “This is a lot to take in,” I sob as his fingers slide under my eyes.

“This has been happening for a long time, baby,” he says, gently brushing his lips across mine.

“I know,” I agree, crying harder while clutching onto him. Rolling us to our sides with me tucked into the back of the couch, he presses my face into his chest, holding one hand behind my head, the other wrapped tightly around me. “I love you, too,” I whisper. His body stills and his arms tighten before he lets out a long breath.

“I know, baby.” Feeling his lips at the top of my head, I lean my head back to look at him.

“Are your friends still here?”

“No they caught a flight out before I went to the club last night.”

“That was a short visit.”

“It was just business,” he mutters then searches my face. “Did you sleep?” he asks studying me.

“Yes.” I nod, pressing my forehead into his chest.

“Did you eat?”

“No, I had a Diet Coke,” I say, cuddling deeper into him, feeling myself relax.

“You need to eat, and then I want to take you to the hospital.”

“Why do I need to go to the hospital?” I ask, feeling my muscles grow tight.

“I want them to take some blood so we know what you were drugged with.”

“Oh,” I whisper, tilting my head back to look at him. “You have a camera over the bar.”

“I do. Zack sent over the video, but it didn’t capture anything out of the ordinary. The only person who poured your drinks was Eva—”

“She wouldn’t drug me,” I say, cutting him off, and his lips brush over mine.

“I know she’s your friend, baby, but everyone is a suspect right now.” He’s right, and that sucks. I like Eva a lot, but she is the only one I remember giving me a drink, and knowing me, I never would have left that drink unattended. “We’ll face that bridge when we come to it, but for now, I want you to eat something so we can go to the hospital.”

“Okay,” I agree as he rolls us off of the couch and takes me to the kitchen, making me sit as he makes me a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Then he sits with me as I eat it before putting me in his SUV and taking me to the hospital.

“Are you on
any kind of birth control?” the nurse asks as another woman places the needle in my arm.

“No,” I tell her, absently noticing the way Sven’s body has gone tight next to mine.

“Are you on any medication?”

“No,” I repeat, watching the woman in front of me place a small cylinder on the end of the needle then let out a ragged breath as the tube fills with blood.

“Have you taken any drugs in the last twenty-four hours that your aware of?”

“No.”

“We should have the results for this test back in the next week. If the drug is still in your system, we will let you know what we find.”

“Thanks,” I tell her then watch her and the other woman leave the room. After putting on my sweater, Sven takes my hand and leads me out of the hospital to the SUV and helps me inside, making sure I’m buckled before going around the front to get behind the wheel. Once we’re halfway home, I look over at him, realizing he hasn’t spoken.

“Are you okay?” Lifting my hand to his lips, he kisses my fingers then says something against them I can’t make out as he drops our entwined hands to his thigh. “What was that?” I ask, studying his profile.

“We didn’t use protection.”

Blinking, I wonder if I heard him correctly then blink again as his fingers tighten around mine. “It sounded like you just said we didn’t use protection.”

“I did.”

“As in condoms?” I ask, and his face turns toward me as he pulls up to a stop sign. “Holy crap.”

“I assumed.”

“You assumed,” I repeat, because apparently that’s all I can do as I study him.

“Fuck.”

“Ditto,” I whisper back then blabber, “The chance of getting pregnant from having sex once is like almost nonexistent right? I mean, that kind of thing doesn’t happen like ev—”

“Four times.”

“What?” I breathe, looking over at him.

“It was four times, not once.” He clarifies.

“Four?”

“Four,” he repeats, turning onto our block.

And I don’t remember even one time.
“Was it even good?” I ask without thinking.

“The best I’ve ever had,” he says immediately.

“I was a virgin,” I whisper, wondering how the heck I could possibly be the best he ever had when I had never done it before.

“I know, and it kills me that you don’t remember.”

“Well,” I mutter, having no clue what to say now.

“I guarantee you will remember the next time,” he says as he pulls into the driveway and shuts down the engine.

Oh wow, okay.

Without another word, he gets out, comes around to help me down, and then leads me inside and upstairs. Pulling his hand when we reach the top landing, his eyes come to me. “That’s my room,” I tell him with a nod of my head toward my door.

“You’re sleeping with me.”

“Um…”

“Sleep, Mags.”

“I…” I mutter trying to come up with something to say.

“Let’s go.” He tugs my hand. I follow him past my door and into his room then into his bathroom where he set’s up his toothbrush for me. Without a word I brush my teeth while watching him watch me in the mirror. When I finish I watch as he uses his toothbrush. When he’s done, he takes my hand again, letting it go when I’m standing at the side of the bed. I watch him kick off his shoes and pull his shirt off over his head. “Come here.” He takes a seat on the side of the bed then drags me to stand between his spread thighs.

“What are you doing?” I ask as he unbuttons my shorts and slides them down over my hips, letting them fall to the floor leaving me in a pair of cotton boy shorts.

“You need sleep,” he mutters, pulling my sweater off my shoulders, letting it join my shorts, and then he runs his hands up my back, under my tank, unhooking my bra.