Don't... 04 Backlash (32 page)

“Hey,” said
Dare, giving a gentle stroke at Jan’s arm. “Not a good place, Jan.
Please, just—”

A thud came
from behind the double doors. It took all of Jan’s focus hearing
it. Shoulders were drawn back, breath barely given release as he
listened, just waited, then—

A cry came.
Jack’s. It didn’t sound like Trace, and Craig didn’t seem the type
to get involved. Another came, followed by a thud and a shout of,
“Fuck” and—

Jan’s first
shoulder-slam made no impact, but his cry met Jack’s in the next
breath, and this time the door whimpered and gave way. Dare didn’t
even have time to take in who was doing what or where. Jan shifted
through and made it onto the floor, to Trace, and he didn’t seem to
draw breath as his rough shove sent Trace stumbling a few
paces.

Jack seemed to
jolt, shout a warning, then scramble to his feet. “Hey, no. Easy.”
He came between Trace and Jan, but Jan was already taking a swing
at Trace. Trace had just enough time to push Jack away before
catching a fist to his jaw for his efforts. Jan hit blindly and
hardly even seemed to hunt for an apology before coming in for
Trace again.

This was
different from the Jan that Dare had met in America, the shy,
slender form he’d just seen cover himself in a huge towel to hide
past hurt. He didn’t know this aggression. There was no rage, no
anger, just the constant need for everything to...

“Stop.” Jan
shoved Trace back again, then again. Trace lost his footing and
Jack’s warning cry went up as Jan moved in to crack Trace’s skull
open with his boot. “Not so tough... not so fucking tough,
you—”

“
Jan,
no.”
Jack moved the
same time Dare did, but someone else brushed past Dare, making him
startle. At first he thought Gabe, then Craig, but there was barely
enough time to react to how Gray pushed Jack back, then shifted for
Jan.

Gray’s arm
snaked Jan’s throat, the other his waist, then Jan was pulled
around, away, and in the next moment he was forced out of the hall
so quickly Dare was left with nothing to do but look at Trace... at
Jack.

Out in the
hall, Jan cried out and Dare moved as a soft thud went up against
the wall outside.

Gray had Jan
pinned against it, body pressed in close, but with a touch running
down Jan’s jaw that cried tender brutality, one that Dare stopped
himself from breaking up. Whispered words came as Jan tried to
shake free. Then, as Gray pulled Jan in close with an arm circling
his neck, Jan cried out and held on.

“
Stop. Need it to fucking stop.”

“Easy, easy,”
whispered Gray, although when he looked in the direction of the
hall, the coldness made Dare want to slip back inside and pull the
door closed with the biggest bolt the world could offer.

“
Jack
.” That
came from Gray. “Here. Fucking
now
.”

Jack buffeted
past Dare, and as he made it over to Gray, Gray pulled Jack the
last few steps, into Jan. “You don’t fucking move from him. We
clear?”

Gabe came down
the hall the same moment Gray pushed away from Jan, and the look
that passed between Master Dom and Dom could have caused cold wars.
Gabe eased Dare away from the door, from all the heat, as Gray
pushed past into the hall, not saying a word.

“On me,” said
Gabe as Dare tried to follow Gray. “You let them deal now, and you
stay with me. We clear?”

Dare nodded,
barely, which was just as well as he caught Trace wiping blood off
his mouth. Gray’s vicious shove at Trace nearly sent him down
again.

“
What
the
fuck
are you
doing?”

Trace steadied
himself, uneasy seeing Gray. “Fucking hit me if you think it’ll
make you feel any better, Gray. You—”

Gray took Trace
to the floor with a sweep of legs, and—

“Don’t fucking
push me, Trace,” snarled Gray as he controlled the fall with a grip
at Trace’s collar. “I’m not Jan. I’m not Gabe. I’m not Jack. I hit
you, Micah will be fucking nothing but a ghost from here on
in.”

Trace didn’t
fight back, even though his hand was on the rough grip at the neck
of his shirt. “Yeah. I know you’re hurting, bright eyes.” Quiet.
“But Jack’s still stumbling from the last time you turned serious
on him. And Jan... He’s struggling to hold on to reality because of
it. Do you really want to go down this path again?”

No sound came
from the floor. After a moment, Gray eased back. Trace got to his
feet and wiped at his jaw again, then looked at the blood on his
sleeve, at Gray.

“Five minutes,”
said Gray, his tone seeming to sting Trace. “It’s more than I’d
give anyone else for hurting him, Trace. You talk fucking
fast.”

“I’ll give you
two words instead. For Jan.”

All life
drained out of Trace as Gray eased back a touch.

“Nothing
happened here,” Trace said gently. “Just a suggestion of something.
But not for Jack, for Jan.” Trace went close to Gray. “Jack played
this right. Like you, he asked Jan to say stop, to say no, because
Jan so obviously didn’t want this to go down. We would have stopped
then if he had just said no.” Anger was back in Trace’s eyes. “That
could have been my boy on the floor. It could have been Gabe. It
nearly was Jack.” Trace eased off. “As much as I’m here to help
focus yours, I’m here for my kids too, Gray. I need to know they’re
safe. From what I just saw, we’ve not even touched Jack yet—and
mine are far from fucking safe.”

Gray took a
step closer. “Dangerous play, Trace. Done without me here, without
my fucking permission—with my fucking sub, my fucking lover.” Craig
got a look back too. “You agreed to this?”

Dare had almost
forgotten about the psychiatric nurse. The man hadn’t shifted and
thick arms were still folded, case close to his feet. Gray got a
shake of head.

“I was here for
Jack and Jan. I made it clear nothing happens here that could
trigger Martin; it’s not ethical, it’s not safe. From what happened
a few nights back, Jack’s not stable enough to consider a break
like that. The sedative was for your guys there if I thought that
any of them would breach Jack’s comfort zones by a fingernail. I
didn’t know that they hadn’t cleared this with you.” His look was
for Trace then. “I should have been told that.”

“You wouldn’t
have stood here if I had.”

“No.”

“Exactly.”
Trace dismissed him at that. “Jack timed it, Gray. He timed it
knowing you’d be here to intervene if something went wrong. But
also timed it so he had some breathing space beforehand to focus on
Jan without you pulling him back from handling him.” There was a
lot of hurt in Trace’s eyes, and for the first time, Gabe shifted
from Dare and went over to Gray, pulling something from his back
pocket as he did.

“Jack,” he
called out, not looking back.

Jack came into
the hall, and Gabe held something out to Gray.

“Put them on
him, Gray.”

Trace frowned
at the cuffs. Gabe hadn’t brought any with him. So these were
Gray’s. And from the look he gave as he glanced down, Gray
recognised them.

“Your
grandfather cleaned your bedroom the last time Jack wore these.”
Gabe glanced at Jan as Jan came into the hall. “Take them,” he said
to Gray.

Gray looked
down, then reached and took the cuffs. For a moment he turned them
over in his hands, feeling their weight, then he glanced across to
Jack.

Jack took a
step forward, but in the same instant, Gray backed off with just
the slightest movement.

“Enough,” said
Gabe, and he took the handcuffs back as Jan came over.

“Gray?” Jan
never looked so confused as he brushed a touch down Gray’s arm.

“Yeah,” said
Jack quietly. “I know I hurt you, mukka.”

“You called me
here because you trust me.” Trace gripped the back of Gray’s neck
and pulled his head to his. “You called my Doms here because you
trust them, because you thought Jack trusted Gabe.” He kissed at
Gray’s cheek. “Jack put Jan in our hands, Gray; he put you there
too, and that’s something so much deeper. He knows this isn’t just
about him. It’s about Jan—about you. Gabe was kept in isolation
away from any negative influences on Jack, with Craig kept close
because Jack trusts him to take him down if things did get pushed
too far, also Jan. He also trusted you’d be here for the fallout.
He anticipated Jan’s reaction, although it shocked the fucking life
out of us both when Jan—”

“Jack?” Jan
shifted slightly. “You... you.... What the—” Jack came closer and
Jan was all with him. “You... Martin... Trace said he’d
trigger—”

Jack’s face
creased and he shook his head. “No, soft lad. I wouldn’t ever risk
triggering Martin around you. And when you didn’t see through that,
I wanted to see if you could say you needed it to stop before you
went into this.” And the honesty there had Jan taking one step
forward. “Afterwards... we got in a little rough and tumble,
nothing more. Just some...” The smile there was so sad. “Cause and
effect.”

“Cause...” Jan
sucked in a breath, took a step back. “Cause and fucking effect?
You. You....” A hand went to his mouth. “Ah. You set me up?”

“Not to hurt,
Jan. To find your voice before it started to hurt.” Jack looked
down, just briefly. “BDSM isn’t just about sex, soft lad,” Jack
said quietly. “It’s about us. How it affects us as a triad. I
needed to know how it would affect you because you damn well aren’t
talking to anyone about how all of this is hurting you: you weren’t
thinking for yourself and—”

“
Martin!”
Jack flinched at Jan’s shout. “This wasn’t about BDSM—you
fucking well said this—
this
—was
about Martin, not BDSM.”

Jack
nodded. “How he tears at you, it’s about that gorgeous vanilla side
of yours realising consent and safety isn’t just for kinksters,” he
said. “It’s about you and—ah,
fuck
.” He had the wind knocked out of him as Jan pushed past.
Jack tried to catch hold of his jumper, but Jan twisted viciously
around, snapping his arm away.

“No,” snarled
Jan. “Not these head games. Not you, you fuck.”

“Jan—” Jack
wasn’t the only one who called Jan’s name as Jan shifted down the
corridor.

“
Fuck,”
cried Jack, hands on his head. “
Fuckfuckfuck
...”

“You wanted a
reaction,” said Gray, not taking his gaze off Jack. “You got
one.”

Jack caught up
with Jan in a room known as the Oval. Just a few doors away from
the hall, the Oval was insulated with specialist material that
could scramble any listening device, giving Gray all the privacy he
needed with MI5 work. It had an office desk, air conditioning, but
no windows. The lights weren’t on inside, and the fading light only
managed to help darken the festering shadows in there.

Gray was forced
to slow his own pace as Jack tried to grab at Jan’s sleeve again.
It worked in part, but only because Jan spun around, pushing Jack
viciously enough he ended up on his ass.

“
No
.” Jan
looked back at the door, at Gray, as if questioning why he’d penned
himself into a corner. Then every part of heat and cold sweat was
focused on Jack. “Stay away from me.
This, you—
sick. So fucking sick and—”

Gray started
for Jan, but a quick raised hand off Jack warned him back. “Listen,
soft lad, you—”

“
I
can’t do this anymore,”
Jan shouted, jerking Jack to a halt with his cry as Jack
tried to get up off the floor. “Don’t.... Don’t make me fucking do
this anymore, Jack. Please.”

“
Make
you...?” Jack looked so puzzled as he stared up at Jan’s anger,
then it infected his own. “
I never make you do fucking anything, Jan.
I needed to show you that you
weren’t fucking acting for yourself, that you’re far from okay with
any of this.”

“
Then why
didn’t you look at me and
ask
me, you
fuck? Why this? Why... this?” A tear streaked Jan’s face and Gray
groaned, instinctively moving to try and stop the hurt.

“
No, not
you. Not him,” snarled Jan. His look was back on Jack, and he
closed the distance between them so quickly, looking ready to
finish what he’d started with Trace, but now with Jack there on the
floor. “Two weeks. For two fucking weeks I was chained away from
you, watching you raped, hearing you struggle for breath as Vince
nearly drowned you in a bath, seeing our worlds fall when they
dropped Gray’s photo and wouldn’t let you touch, let you find
comfort.
It buried
every part of me, Jack
. But when they pulled you away, you bastard—when they
locked the doors and it was only me, just listening... just
waiting... not knowing what was going on... it stripped every part
of my fucking soul. And you—” Grief came a little more freely now
as he grabbed Jack close by the collar. “You did
exactly
the same just. You locked me
away and all I could fucking do was think.”

“Easy.” Gray
needed to calm him down, but Jan’s focus was all on Jack.

“You got to
hide in the drugs. But me, I remember every... fucking... thing,”
said Jan. “Do you know what it’s like to be able to remember every
fucking thing, Jack? To not have the ability to forget all the whip
marks and burning skin like you do, you bastard? Do you—”