Doubting Thomas (Tarnished Saints Series) (13 page)

“We don’t have to do this part if you don’t want to.”

Her heart sank, thinking he was giving her a way out. Ever since she’d been bold enough to kiss him on the cheek in the barn, she couldn’t stop thinking about kissing him again. She felt an attraction to Thomas even if he didn’t feel one for her. But if he didn’t want to kiss her, than she didn’t want him to have to do it.

“Well, I guess we can skip this part,” she said, hoping he would object, knowing he wouldn’t.

She felt a tug on her dress and looked down to see Gabby staring up at her.

“I think you should kiss him if he’s going to be my new dad.”

She looked back at Thomas, feeling her face flush. “Well, honey,” she said, talking to Gabby. “If Mr. Taylor doesn’t want to kiss me . . . ”

She got no further. His hand came around the back of her head and he leaned forward, gently pressing his lips up against hers. Her eyes closed partially and her head tilted back as the essence of his lips mingled with hers. Warmth flowed through her body as the kiss lingered. Odd, from a man who supposedly couldn’t stand her. She felt her knees buckle as he came back for a second kiss without hesitation.

“All right you two, save some for the honeymoon.” Gus chuckled, wiping his eye with the back of his hand.

Thomas pulled back and she opened her eyes wide. It took her several minutes to catch her breath.

“I just did it because I didn’t want to disappoint Gabby,” he mumbled.

She looked down, not at all happy to know he hadn’t done it on his own accord, still not sure she believed him.

“Of course,” she said. “We wouldn’t want to disappoint her.”

“Throw the flowers,” Gabby told her, backing away to catch them. Tillie smiled for the first time, holding on to the girl’s shoulders.

“Okay, catch,” she said, throwing them directly to Gabby. Somehow she missed them and picked them up off the floor, and jumped up, holding them up in triumph.

“Now go outside,” Gabby instructed. “We’re going to throw rice at you.”

Gabby was having so much fun that she hated to tell the little girl that she wasn’t even sure Thomas could be released yet. She looked over to him, a question on her brow.

“Can we do that?” she asked, then looked at the cop.

“He’s signed out,” said the deputy. “And since no one is pressing charges, he’s free to go home. But CPS will be coming to check on things in the home frequently.”

“I know the drill,” Angel told the cop and took Thomas by the arm. “Can we get out of here?” she whispered. Thomas nodded, leading her outside where Gabby so graciously threw handfuls of rice in their hair.

Angel laughed and picked up her daughter in a squeeze, then thanked Tillie. Thomas had a quick conversation with Gus.

“What happens now?” Tillie asked Angel in a hushed voice.

Angel sent her daughter over to Thomas before she answered.

“Well, it’s not like we’ll be spending the night on a heated honeymoon. I’m not even sure he’s not going to make me sleep in the barn.”

“Oh, Angel,” Tillie said with tears in her eyes. “What have you done?”

Thomas walked over just then, dragged by her daughter.

“Come on, let’s go home,” said Gabby, letting go of Thomas and running to the Ainsley’s car which they’d borrowed.

“Watch where you’re going,” shouted Tillie, running after the girl.

That left Thomas and Angel standing alone, awkward and speechless. She didn’t know what would happen now, and this scared her.

“You know I have to move in with you,” said Angel nervously. “If I don’t stay with you at the cabin, Child Services won’t be writing up a good report. They might even decide to take away the kids even though we’re married.”

“I know,” he said. “What about Gabby?”

Angel looked back to the car as Tillie helped the little girl inside. “I’ll have her spend the days at the cabin, but since the place is so small, I think she’ll be spending the nights at the Ainsleys. At least for now. I don’t want her sleeping on the floor.”

“Of course not.”

She saw a nerve twitch in his jaw and she knew her comment had upset him. She wanted to ask where she’d sleep, but didn’t have the guts. But then again, it didn’t really matter. With the six boys in the house she was sure she’d be safe from him. She may have questions as to the way he raised his kids, but she’d also seen how strict he was with them and the way they acted. One thing she was sure of  - he’d never touch her with his boys right there.

“We can drop you off, and I’ll go to the Ainsleys and collect my things. I’ll be there after I tuck Gabby into bed. And starting tomorrow, I’m going to have to stay at the cabin full time.

She started for the car, but he reached out and took her elbow, causing her to turn. Her eyes raised in question to his face.

“Thank you, Angie,” was all he said before he headed for the car. Such simple words, but they meant the world to her. She knew now she hadn’t made a horrible mistake. And maybe, just maybe, he would learn to like her through time.

Chapter 13

Thomas washed the last dish and handed it to Sam to dry. His boys hadn’t even mentioned the wedding since he’d been home, though they all knew about it. Zeke played with the kittens and Jake and Josh wrestled on the floor. Little Eli sat quietly at Dan’s feet listening to stories for the millionth time from the book of Grimm’s Fairy Tales. This was one of the only books in the house, one that had been Brianne’s favorite.

Thomas didn’t have money for luxuries such as books or toys, nor did he think the boys needed them. Not until now. Not until Angel pointed out to him that he wasn’t a fit father if he didn’t allow his children to play.

He’d always been strict with them in the sense that work came before pleasure. That’s the way he and his eleven brothers had been raised. But when Brianne was alive, she’d made sure to take them on outings or to the county fair. For their birthdays they each had the choice of either spending a day one-on-one with their parents, no siblings involved, or of receiving a present.

They had always chosen the time alone with their parents, so Thomas had thought presents and toys weren’t really important in their lives. Now he wondered if having the attention had been more important. He wondered if he’d done them wrong by raising them this way.

Because of Angel, he was starting to doubt himself again. Had he been blind to the fact that his children were only vying for his individual attention, which he’d neglected to really give them? Where had he gone wrong? And why in heaven’s name did it take an outsider like Angel to point out the fact his children feared him?

He wiped his hands in a towel and hung it up to dry.

“Come on, Sam,” he said with a shake of his head. “Come into the other room, as I have something to say to you all.”

Sam limped after him, and they joined the other boys in the living room.

“Josh, Jake,” he said, “stop wrestling and sit up. I have something I want to talk about with you boys.”

All eyes were on him immediately, attention focused. They knew better than to goof off when he wanted to talk. It wasn’t often he called them together like this in a meeting, but when he did they knew it was something serious. The last time he’d done it was after Fawn died.

“What is it Pa?” asked Dan, closing the book and placing it on the floor.

“Yeah,” Zeke added, putting the kittens back into their basket.

Thomas felt his stomach convulse. He knew he had to talk about marrying Angel and why he’d done it, but it certainly wasn’t easy. Three mothers in one lifetime was more than taxing on anyone, especially little boys.

“You all know I married Angie this afternoon.”

“Do you mean Angel, Pa?” asked Sam with a crease in his brow.

“Yes.” He still couldn’t call her by that name. He still believed God was punishing him for his mistakes and he refused to believe this woman was the angel he prayed for to guide him.

“I don’t love her,” he pointed out. “Nor do I ever intend to. I loved your mother  -  Brianne, and I always will even though she’s gone. I married Angie only because without a mother, Child Services was going to split you up and place you in foster homes. I did it for you boys. Do you understand?”

“Do you mean they were going to take us away from you forever, Pa? And we’d live with people we didn’t even know?” asked Josh.

Just the thought stabbed at Thomas’s heart. He’d come so close to losing his boys. And it was all because of Angel.

“That’s exactly what I mean, son.”

“Why?” questioned Zeke. “Why do they want to take us away from you?”

“Because they don’t believe I’m a good father to you boys.”

“That’s not true,” protested Dan. “You are the best father! How can they even think that?”

“Angeline is a social worker,” he told them. “She’s been spying on us, and because of her accusations we’re in this predicament.”

“No,” Zeke protested. “She’s nice. She wouldn’t do anything to take us away from you.”

“It’s her job,” he explained. “To find parents who neglect and abuse their children, and put the children into proper homes.”

“But she said she didn’t make the call to Child Services,” Dan pointed out.

“I know,” said Thomas. “But she was thinking about doing it, so it’s just as bad. That’s the whole reason she started coming here in the first place. She wanted to ruin me.”

“Pa,” Sam spoke out. “I know I didn’t like her at first, but I’ve changed my mind. If she wanted to ruin you, she never would have married you to save us from being taken away.”

“Yeah,” said Josh nodding in agreement.

“Maybe,” said Thomas, “but I still don’t like what she did.”

“Give her a chance,” Dan told him. “Please, Pa.”

“She’s your stepmother now,” he told them. “I’ll expect you all to be kind to her.”

“Yes, Pa,” they answered one after another, Eli nodding in silent agreement. Everyone complied except for Jake.

“Jake?” Thomas asked, with warning to his voice. The boy was leery of the woman and he couldn’t blame him. After the whole rock throwing incident, Jake had decided it was Angel’s fault he was punished, when all he’d been doing was trying to protect Eli.

“Are
you
going to be nice to her?” Jake asked brashly. The boy never ceased to amaze him. He was so much like Thomas when he was a child, that it wasn’t funny.

“Yes, Jake, I’m going to be nice to her. She’s my wife. I have no choice.”

“Are you two going to fight and scream like you did with Fawn?” He wouldn’t let up.

“Jake,” Dan warned him to be quiet, but Thomas waved him away with his hand.

“It’s all right, Dan. Jake is right. Things are going to be different this time around, I promise you.”

A knock sounded at the door and all eyes turned toward it.

“It’s her,” Thomas said, getting to his feet. He headed to the door, hand reaching out for the knob. Oddly enough, he felt his hand tremble. He turned and looked at his boys once more. “Remember what I said.”

They nodded in eager anticipation, and Thomas only prayed he wouldn’t break his own rules. As much as he wanted to stay far away from the woman who almost did him in, he knew she had also saved him. But he didn’t want to make the same mistake he’d made when he married Fawn. Thinking it was for the boys’ own good, that is. Well, it was too late to think about that now. They were already married. He did what he had to, and there would be no regrets. This time things would be different.

He pulled open the door to find Angel standing there, a suitcase in one hand, a very large bag in the other. Her Windstar was parked a short distance from the house.

“Hi,” she said, flashing a small smile.

Thomas reached out and grabbed the bags from her, his hands brushing hers in the process. A tingle swept through him and he cursed himself inwardly. He didn’t want to have feelings for this woman. She meant nothing to him, he tried to convince himself. It’d been a long time since he had sex and it was only his need for release making him feel this way.

“May I come in?” she asked, bright eyes looking up at him, her tongue flicking out to lick her lips. He felt a tightening in his groin just remembering the kiss they’d shared at the ceremony. He hadn’t meant to go back for a second helping, but damn, her lips felt good caressing his.

She smoothed a lock of hair away from her face, his gold hoop earring on her finger reflecting in the candlelight from inside the house. She looked beautiful. More beautiful than any woman he’d seen in a long time.

Her golden spun hair was pulled back and pinned to the top of her head. Several velvety strands hung across her face and one stuck to her lips and he wanted nothing more than to reach out and brush it away. Her eyes glittered from the sconces next to the door, bright green like newly mown grass. She wore a tight pink tank top that clung to her breasts, and from the night chill he could see evidence that her body was affected.

He hoped his sons wouldn’t notice, but he knew Dan would. She had tight little white shorts clinging to her hips, her navel exposed, about driving him mad. And the sandals on her feet showed off her pink toenails that matched her fingernails. A thin gold bracelet circled her ankle, tempting him to want to remove it with his teeth.

“Yes, come in,” he said blindly, feeling the tightening below his waist. Damn she looked good. Why hadn’t he ever noticed this before? Maybe because before today she was only a nosey vacationer. Tonight she was his wife.

“Hi, Angel,” said Zeke, rushing over to her with a kitten in his hand. Eli ran to her and threw his arms around her legs.

“My, what a reception,” she said with a laugh.

“Kids, I’m not sure you should be calling her by her first name. Angie, did you want them to call you something else?”

“Like what?” she said, smiling at the other boys in the room.

“Like . . . ” Thomas had a hard time saying this, but had to approach the issue. “Like, Mother?”

Her head snapped up and she met his gaze. Her guarded look was amplified by her words. “Is that what you would like them to call me?”

God, he hated these kind of questions. No one could ever replace their real mother. The boys had called Fawn by her first name, but then again she never showed the boys half the attention Angel had already shown them. He couldn’t make this decision, nor did he want to.

“What do you boys want to call her?” he asked, looking for a way out.

“Whatever you want us to, Pa,” said Sam, coming over to say hi to Angel.

“I’m never going to call her Ma,” complained Jake from across the room. This was one time Thomas was glad for the boy’s stubborn streak.

“Well, then I guess it’s settled,” said Thomas. “You’ll call her by her first name.”

“And what name might that be?” Angel challenged him, staring him down for his answer. She knew he wouldn’t say it. He couldn’t call her Angel even if his boys did.

“I’m calling you Angie,” he told her firmly. “They can refer to you however they please.” He kicked the door shut with his foot and headed for the bedroom with the bags.

“Put the shopping bag on the kitchen table,” she called out. “I have presents for everyone in there.”

He stopped in the doorway, letting the suitcase fall from his hand. “We don’t exchange presents.”

“Well, why not?” she asked, getting a squeal of excitement out of Zeke and Josh, and a big smile out of Eli.

“There’s no need.”

“I feel there is a need,” she defied him. “This is my first day with my new family, and I’d like to show I care about them.”

“Thanks Angel,” said Dan coming to her side. “We’ve never really had presents before. Usually Pa lets us choose for our birthday if we want a present or time with our parents. We’ve always taken the special time rather than the present.”

“Really?” Her gaze shot over to Thomas, a surprised tone to her voice.

“But my seventeenth birthday is next week,” continued Dan. “And this year I’ve chosen the present.”

“Well, then we’ll have to have a party, won’t we?” Thomas caught her gaze and shook his head. “Ah. No parties either,” she said. “Why am I not surprised?”

“Dan is too old for parties,” Thomas told her. “He doesn’t want one.”

Angel couldn’t believe the coldness of a father to his sons. She wanted to shout out and tell him he was wrong. She wanted to ask him how he knew his son didn’t want a party when he’d never had one in his life to know what it felt like. Things were going to change now that she was married to Thomas, like it or not.

“Well, give them the bag, Thomas, so they can see what I brought them. Each present is marked with names.”

The boys stood still, the anticipation thick in the room.

“Can we, Pa?” asked Zeke. “Just this once? Please?”

Thomas’s mouth was set firm and Angel hoped he wouldn’t disappoint his sons by saying no. As his wife, she knew she needed to respect his wishes, but if he said no, she was going to have to drag him outside and do her best to convince him. He wasn’t going to spoil her special day. The boys’ special day. Not if she could help it.

He placed the shopping bag on the table and answered in a low voice. “Go ahead. But don’t think this is going to be happening all the time.”

“Yippee,” shouted Josh, and the boys ran over to the table. Even Jake. They dug through the wrapped presents, Dan handing them out one by one. The excitement in their eyes was unbelievable and she wondered if they’d ever experienced a Christmas.

“Angie, I want to talk with you in the other room,” said Thomas, heading for the bedroom.

She wanted to stay and watch the kids open their presents. She wanted him to watch it too. But instead, she did as ordered, following him into the bedroom. He pulled her suitcase inside and closed the door behind them.

Apprehension surged through her, being in a closed room alone with Thomas. The last time she was in here she’d been caught snooping. She felt uncomfortable already.

“Sit down,” he told her, pointing to the bed.

She didn’t want to sit on his bed. Not with the door closed. Not all alone with him.